Why I Celebrate Every Win; And You Should Too

How many times have we got to the end of the day and rather than taking pleasure or joy or patting ourselves on the back about all the good things that have happened or the good things that we've done, we beat ourselves up for the things that we didn't do, for the things we didn't cross off the to do list, for the things that fell by the wayside. That's what we do to ourselves. You're listening to the Circle C Project Foreign welcome to the Triple CE Project, the podcast that helps you gain clarity, boost confidence, build courage so you can live lifeless. I'm your host, Ryan Spence, the big lord, dropout, life coach, author, speaker, lover of hoodies, hip hop and big hairy, audacious goals. If you're tired of living the life you think you should want and ready to start living the life you do want, this podcast will help you get from where you are to where you really want to be. So now with friends, I invite you to grab a drink. Take a seat. Allow me to guide you towards living a life that's lit. Hey hey. Welcome to episode 81 of the Triple C Project. A few days before race day for me, if you've been following the last few weeks, you'll know that I've got a 10k race coming up and you'll also know that I had issues with my back which hampered my training, but I'm back on track and actually a few days ago, as you're listening to this, I went for a super early morning run, 5.30am, still dark outside and it was fantastic. I live in the city of Sheffield in the UK and one of the things that is Sheffield is famous for is its hills. And where I live, if I'm going for a run, I've got at least two real major hills to get up or down depending on where I'm going. And this week's run I was out at 5:40am Within a few minutes I had the first hill did that and then the end of the run ended with the second hill did that. And it was great because when I started training a few weeks ago, those hills scared the hell out of me and the idea of running up them just wasn't going to happen. And so I was pleased with myself because it just shows the consistency of training. Even though I had those spells out has really helped me not just physically but also mentally. And so this is why I talk about consistency beating intensity, because if I just gone out for a really hard run, I would never have made it up those hills. But it's those little gains, the 10 minute runs, the 15 minute runs, the 1530 minute runs, the speed runs, the interval training altogether that have made the difference. So we'll see how I fare on Sunday. I still don't feel I've trained enough, but I'm just going to go there and enjoy the process. So one of the things that I have started doing more now every time I go out for a run is apart from really enjoy trying to enjoy the process of the running, it is to celebrate at the end of the run. So I'm a massive, massive Rocky fan. I love the Rocky movies. The Rocky movies are fantastic. And even if you've never watched the movies, you probably know that famous scene where he's running through the streets of Philadelphia in that gray sweatsuit and then all of the kids are following behind him and then he runs up those steps to that statue and he kind of jumps up and throws his hands in the air. Kind of what I do at the end of a run, not quite, but I do kind of give myself a big yeah out loud and throw my hands in the air. And it's not just because I want to emulate Rocky, and it's not because I want to show myself up around whoever else is watching, but it's because it's important to me to celebrate the fact that I completed the run, the fact that I got up but I didn't want to, particularly at 5:40am when it's still dark outside and it's raining, got on my running shoes, got on my running gear, got out for a run, kept running and finished the run that I intended to do. It's important for me to celebrate along the way, and that's what I want to talk to you about this week, is celebrating your wins. I used to talk about celebrate the small wins, but actually, scratch that, I now want to talk about just celebrating all wins. Because I think that when I talk about celebrating small wins, sometimes people get hung up on, well, is this a small win? Is this a big win, is this a medium win? And actually, all I really care about is that you celebrate your wins. So one of the first questions I ask clients when I'm working with them at the beginning of every session is what went well for you this week? What, what, what are the wins for you since our last session? And I asked that because, partly because I love the reaction and partly because we are always our own worst critics, how many times have we got to the end of the day and rather than taking pleasure or joy or patting ourselves on the back about all the good things that happened or the good things that we've done. We beat ourselves up for the things that we didn't do, for the things we didn't cross off the to do list, for the things that fell by the wayside. That's what we do to ourselves. And if we treat ourselves that way, if we keep beating ourselves down, if we don't celebrate ourselves, then who's going to celebrate you? You've got to be looking out for yourself and be recognizing the things that you've done to give you that motivation, that inspiration, that desire to get up the next day and to keep on going. That's why I ask clients the question. And the interesting thing about when I ask that question is nine times out of ten, with every client, they start off by saying nothing because they want to start the session by usually talking about what didn't go well that week and what they want to focus on for that session, what they need support with. And that's all cool, but try it. Think about it. Whenever you are in that headspace of feeling down, look at how your body language is. Your posture goes. You maybe hang your head low, you know, maybe you feel quite tense or quite anxious, and that's not a good state to feel inspired and to get shit done, right? But when you start to think about wins, things that excite you, things that you've done well, everything changes. Your shoulders roll back, your chest puffs out, your head hangs up. Maybe you even get a little cheeky smile on your face, you know, and you feel, yeah, I'm great. Okay, what's the next thing? And you build up this momentum. And so that's why it's important to take note and celebrate all of your wits. Now, there's a number of ways you can do that. I used to be pretty consistent at keeping a win journal. And every month I would sit down and think, what are my wins for the month? Inevitably, I think I had none. And then within the space of about 10 or 15 minutes, I would just have a list of 15, 20, sometimes more things that had gone really well that month. I'm not as diligent at doing that anymore. And it's maybe something that I'll get back to, but I will sort of take time, post my mold of meditation to a bit of journaling, just to kind of think about what's. What's coming up for me and what's going well. You can take notes in your phone, maybe just keep a running total in your phone at the end of each day, if that's something that works for you. But finding some way to reflect upon the things that went well will stop you dwelling on the things that didn't go so well. And the more that you build up this body of evidence, this body of wins that you have, that's going to kind of help you when things aren't necessarily going your way, when obstacles arise. So celebrating your wins is very important. Now you may say to me, I really don't have any wins, as clients do. I really don't have any wins. And if you really can't think of any wins, the best thing that I find to do is start with the things that are staring you in the face, which you might not even class them with class as wins. So the, I guess the prevalent one is the fact that you woke up today and you're alive. That's a win, it might seem. Oh, yeah, but that's nothing. I didn't do anything. But you did. You got up, you could have woken up staying in bed all day, you could have skyed off work, you could have just hidden away in a corner somewhere. But you got up, you probably got yourself dressed, you made yourself food, you woke up in a place with a roof over your head. Maybe you had some money in your pocket. You had somebody who you could converse with, a companion, a friend. You helped somebody out of a sticky situation, you gave somebody advice, some advice that they really appreciated. You did a really good piece of work. Even if you hated your job, you actually went in and you crushed it today. You did something great that a client really appreciated. You ate some really good food today. You didn't drink today. If you're trying not to drink or you didn't eat any junk food today. If you're trying not to eat junk food. Throughout the course of every day. There were so many wins that you can have, that you will have had. But unless we take the time to really focus on celebrating those wins, those wins are going to pass you by and you'll be left with this pile of things that didn't go great, that are going to continue to weigh you down. So that's my message for you in this week's episode. Celebrate all of your wins, no matter how small you think they are, whether they think they're medium or large, they does not matter. All wins create this foundation from which you can launch yourself from they launch this body of evidence that's going to help you counteract the negative feelings when things aren't going your way, when challenges Arise. I know this because I do it. And I know this because clients do it. I see the shift in them when I ask that question. And I don't let them off the hook by saying nothing happened. I just sit there and wait for them to bring something up for me. Maybe they've even told me about something in the previous week. They've mentioned something in a message that they may not have thought of as a win, but I would have seen the growth or I would have seen that development in them. And I can point that out and say, but what about this? Didn't you feel good about that? You said you felt great about that. You said that this is a change from what you may have done before. And I can help them to see for themselves that they have got more wins than they ever thought that they had. And once they see that, their body changes, their whole demeanor changes. And we can then proceed to the remainder of the session with them in the right frame of mind. Open minded, curious, positive, determined. So that's what I want for you. You're not sat in a coaching session with me, but you can still do this yourself by taking the time each day find is useful each week, whatever frequency is good for you to think about. What are my wins today? What are my wins this week? How have I succeeded? How have I done what I set out to do or made steps towards what I set it out to do? How have I made somebody else's day better? It doesn't really matter. You can call it a win, it doesn't matter if somebody else calls it a win. It's about you. It's about what's furthering your mission, whatever that is. Whether it's personal growth, whether it's knowing yourself better, whether it's getting to a particular place, whether it's acquiring a particular thing. Wins will happen for you every day. And even if the only win you can think of that day is the fact that you woke up and you're alive, that's still a win to be celebrated. And as to how you celebrate that win, entirely up to you. You can be like me and reenact Rocky 2. You can get yourself a nice glass of champagne, which I also partial to time to time. You can just say to yourself, good job. Just nod your head, just sit in silence for a minute and just reflect on, yeah, that was something really great that I did. That's something really good that I've done. I'm really pleased with the way that that went. Doesn't matter. Big celebration, small celebration. You can tell people about it, you can shout it from the rooftops, you can post it on social media. Again, it's all about what you feel comfortable with and what works for you. But please don't let those winds pass you by because you're going to need them. You're going to need to rest on those, to hold onto those. Because things are going to get tricky as you go from living a life of lethargy towards living a life that's lit. Things are going to challenge you because you're changing the whole way that you think, the whole way that you live. You're changing your whole being in some senses. And so having those wins to see that, yes, I have made a lot of progress. I am on the right track and this is what I have to show for it is really going to help you keep going and keep moving forward. Thanks for listening this week. As always, I'd love to hear what you take away from this episode. Tell me. In fact, tell me one win that you are celebrating today either as you listen to this episode. What's one win that you will celebrate today? And how will you celebrate it? And send me an email. Hey am Ryan Spence.com or hit me up on Instagram am_spence or over on LinkedIn, find me Ryan Spence. All of those links are in the show description, so please tell me. I really want to hear and I want to be able to cheer you on. And if you want to experience what it's like to be in those sessions with me where I sit back in silence staring at you as you frantically try to think of what wins you've had this week and then see how that changes how you progress and helps you move further forward from that life of lethargy towards a life that's lit, then I'd love to hear from you. Head to iamrianspence.com coaching and book yourself a consultation call. We'll sit 50 minutes, we'll chat, I'll find out more about you, find out where you want to get to, and together we'll formulate a plan to get you there in a way that's sustainable to you, in a way that acknowledges your strengths, in a way that acknowledges where it is that you want to get to, and in a way that helps you build a healthy practice of celebrating all of your wins. Thanks for being here and I will catch you again next week for another episode of the Triple C Project. Until then, stop living a life of lethargy. Start living life. Thanks for tuning in to the Triple C project. In the spirit of the Triple C, here's three things that you can do to support the show. Head to ratethispodcast.com or over to your favorite podcast app and leave a review. Reviews really help people checking out shows to see what they can expect and how the show can help them. Second thing you can do? Share. Share this episode Share a previous episode with a friend, Someone who you feel could benefit from what I'm throwing down on this here show. And number three, head to iamryspence.com get on the main list. I'll be sharing news about the show, news about what I'm up to. My new book Start writing soon. So to be the first to be in the know, you need to get yourself on the list. Really appreciate you being here. And until next week, stop living a life of lethargy. Start living life lit.