Sally A. Curtis moved from overwhelmed multi-business owner to networking expert by focusing on congruent messaging and asking questions about others instead of yourself. She maps contacts in layers, identifies key connectors, and uses an edification model to introduce valuable people to each other, turning networking into collaborative work toward shared purpose.
Chapters
So I was a highly overwhelmed and very, very stressed multiple business owner. In other words, it's you and your messages. Are your messages congruent with everything that you do, you say, etc.? Do people go, oh God, what do they want now, when they get a phone call from you? Or do they go, great, sounds fun, let's, let's do something? So if you're focusing on other people and asking great questions, your torchlight is focused on them. But when you are asking questions such as, are they going to be a good customer to me? What do I need to say next? Your focus is on yourself. It is not on the other person. You're having a good, good conversation with them, and then all of a sudden it can crash and burn. And that is based on that unconscious scorecard and the level of congruency in the messages that you're delivering to people. Now I'm sure all of us have at some point in our life had an extremely messy desk and we can't find anything and it's frustrating and we spend half the day tidying that desk up so we can actually get back into proper activity. So they love to get bogged down in the details. Shut up. And they would prefer to be in their office with their head in the details or looking at the spreadsheets than out dealing, mixing with people. That's just where they prefer. They prefer to be bogged down in the, how do I improve this? How do I get this to work more effectively? And all great networks and all great companies have these. And the best way to create atmosphere for me is giving people chocolate. I like to give people chocolate about this point. It gives them a bit of a boost and they will get in your good books, Michelle, with you. They want to have the iPhone when it first comes out. They want to be seen to be one of the cool kids, or at least I did. And Tyson's out there and he says to me, how do you want these cooked? How do you want these potatoes cooked? Sounds like a simple question, doesn't it? So I respond, however they come, because I don't like that question. It's not one of my questions. He looks at me with the— and I said, however they come, I don't really care, just however they come. And then he looked at me and he said, when should I take them off? As soon as they're crispy. Do what others won't so you can play how— because I know how to play well— and where others can't. Think of the key people that you know within your network and think about other key people that they should be introduced to and use that edification model to do so. Atmosphere is a pervading mood, and didn't the atmosphere change when you all got chocolate? It creates a distinctive quality, and when you look at your network in a layered perspective and you start to look more at a strategic wealth network and understanding who are the key people to be connecting with and who to invest the time with, it becomes a lot less hard work. In fact, it becomes a lot easier and becomes more of a playground where people with common interests and commonalities and core values are actually playing together with a common purpose. So if you would like to come and ask me questions or you want some dirt and some gossip and, you know, anything else, you've got plenty of other people in the room. Thank you very, very much for joining me this evening. Really look forward to meeting you at a workshop and at an event or online or in person. In any time, I would look forward to that, and I look forward to meeting you very, very soon. Thank you very much. You have a fantastic day. Bye.
