Success Secrets Exposed - How to Make Yourself Referrable

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Welcome to Success Secrets Exposed with Sally A. Curtis, where we share stories of challenge, success, and inspiration, along with practical tips and strategies to move you forward. And now here's your host, Sally A. Curtis.

Good morning, good evening, and good day to you all. Welcome to another fabulous show. Today we're going to be talking about how to be more referable, and it's one of my favorite topics, referral marketing. So for those that are new to the show, my name is Sally, obviously, and I'm a marketing problem solver and growth expert specializing in content repurposing and LinkedIn strategy specifically for coaches, consultants, and speakers. And it's my job to help you amplify your voice, your message, and your impact. Now today I have a very, very special guest, Steve Sweeney. Who is a referral marketing expert and trainer. Now, Steve is the owner and head trainer of the Australian Referral Academy, a training academy, and he believes it's better to attract clients than to sell. Steve has trained thousands of business owners and their teams to attract businesses via referrals through such organizations as BNI, Business in Hills, coworking spaces, and multitudes of independent networking groups. His trainings include referral generation strategies, presenting to attract business, and how to conduct profitable business meetings. So you're going to learn some really, really great tips today, and of course the big one, how to be more referable. So please help me welcome to this

It's my absolute pleasure to be here, Sal. I've been looking forward to this since we organized it way back in May, I think it was sometime. So yeah, it's great to be here. Thank you for having me.

You're very, very welcome. And as I said, it's one of my favorite topics, referral marketing and/or referrals in general, and putting strategies in place to help businesses to maximize that underutilized resource. So I'm super excited to be sharing you today. So thank you. Can I ask you to tell us a little bit of your background? Why did you start the Referral Training Academy?

That's a great question, Sally, and thank you very much. It's a— look, I kind of fell into it, to be quite honest. So as you mentioned in the intro there, I was once part of an organization, which is a magnificent organization called BNI. And I kind of progressed up through the ranks there of the director ranks. For the people out there who are familiar with it, there's ambassadors, directors, Area directors, director of this, director of that. And I became— one day, the boss came to me and said, Steve, I can't actually do the training today. You know this stuff, kinda. Would you do it? And I said, all right. Anyway, so I stood in front of a room full of, I don't know, 40 or whatever it was, new members in the region that I was operating in. Wow. And I did what is BNI's basic training and it went well. The feedback was terrific. And then from there, the boss kept on giving me more and more gigs until he kind of invented this role of Director of Training. And that was fantastic. I absolutely thrived in that. So at one point I was responsible for training roughly 1,000 BNI members across 2 separate sectors of BNI and just getting around to all the different chapters and learning about how referral marketing works. And so I kind of did all that for 4 or 5 years. And then I thought to myself, you know what, it's time to leave the nest. Spread your wings. It's time to give it a crack, Steve-O, and get the heck out there. And one of the other things that I do, just as a by-the-by, which kind of relates to this, is I help out at Deakin University and the Cancer Council and a couple of other places in teaching doctors and nurses and any types of medical people kind of the art and science of creating rapport and trust with their patients. And so, the communication skills that I've learned there are more or less directly— you can take them out and implant them into the business world, which as you would know, Sal, is a lot about building trust quickly with prospects, with colleagues, with employees, with suppliers, you name it. It's all about trust. And so I find that, you know, I'm able to add that little extra something to the training that I carry on with these days. So yeah, it's a lot of fun. And that's, you know, in a nutshell, that's my journey.

Yeah, lovely. I've recently done some improv work, and there was a number of doctors that were coming along to learn the ability to be a little bit more improvised in their reactions. And it was funny because they were the most beautiful and warmest people I've met, there was 2 doctors. But as they said, they've got so academic that they've actually become quite stilted. So that's why they were there to learn to be, in his words, a little bit more human again, which, as you said, certainly builds that trust. He was a beautiful human being, but just needed retraining or unlearning or whatever the terms would— relevant terms would be for there. So no, great from a rapport-building perspective. And trust is so important. And I'm finding, as you probably have, that there's a huge increase in requirement of trust with business owners and in that purchasing and sales process at the moment. Have you been finding that with your clients that you're working with as well?

Absolutely. People are always seeking to know a little bit more, just like you've done. You started out with the question on the backstory, right? And people are always seeking find out a little bit more about the human being they're going to be actually interacting with through the course of any business operation or relationship. And so, and that's where the trust begins, you know, that's where that little kernel of trust slowly begins to grow and become something that, you know, we obviously call a relationship for mutual benefit. And so, yes, I'm certainly noticing that. And one of the things that I think is, you know, it's pretty obvious the situation we're all in right now with COVID and whatnot. And so it's that, that the minimization of the face-to-face interactions, the in-person face-to-face interactions, I think has affected that. And we've all become experts on various platforms now that are exactly like the one you and I are currently on. Yeah. And that, and being able to do that and being able to stand in front of a camera and smile and look at a person on a screen and all those types of things, They are the sorts of things that are very, very important for the development of the trust that's required to build a business relationship.

And I think we've also, as part of that process, got even better at cyberstalking before we even actually meet the person. So we actually do— we're able to do more research and find more stuff out and find more information that helps us build that trust and tie in and understand that human being a little bit more. Because we're always looking for that. Are they trustable? Will they do what they say? Can I put my faith in them?

Yeah. And are they good at what they do as well? That's one of the other things. Can they actually do what they say they're going to do? And so it's interesting you bring up cyberstalking in a light kind of manner, obviously. But it's, yeah, we all absolutely do it. People leave a digital footprint. And so as business owners, when I talk about make yourself more referable, You absolutely need to make sure that your cyber footprint assists your referability. It doesn't detract from it, you know, because people will check you out. It's just that simple.

Yeah, absolutely. And we'll probably come back to that, but I'd love to ask you, why are referrals so important in business in 2021 right now? Why are referrals so important?

Because it's to me, okay, one of the things that separates referrals from leads or digital marketing or all of those other things. So they all lead to a human-to-human interaction, whether it's a digital connection or a lead that you've got to chase down. And leads have a pretty low conversion rate depending upon the nature of the lead that you are given. Conversion rates on leads are sometimes 10% is a good conversion rate. Whereas with a referral, if it's set up properly, the conversion Conversion rate can be up in the 70% and 80%. Yeah, exactly. And that's because of the trust that exists. And so being able to have that trust, so, you know, you recommend me to somebody else, and of course that other person that you recommend me to actually trusts Sally Curtis, then that's a good thing. So you actually begin to cut through all of the other marketing noise that's out there. And when people are, you know, picture yourself as a consumer, right? You know, you've got this, you know, you want an accountant. You've got this wall of accountants on Google, right? An absolute wall of accountants to choose from. And whenever somebody is at the smorgasbord, you know, the first thing they do is stand back and think, what the heck am I going to do? You know, that's what they do. And so what is the normal human interaction there? I'm going to talk to somebody I know who's been here before and made a good choice. And that's where referral marketing assists you to get to that face-to-face conversation sooner than digital marketing, than leads, than all those other things. Is that I was having this conversation with somebody the other day who's hell-bent on an email campaign. And I said, that's great. You know, go out there, send your emails and do whatever, but you're going to end up at a face-to-face conversation. You can take the long way or you can take the short way. And referrals is kind of the short way to that face-to-face conversation. conversation.

It's always fun. I find that interesting. I'm so loving that we're kindred spirits because I find so many people from a networking perspective, if we go outside of a BNI or a networking organization, so many people will go to networking events to pick up leads, but it's all that cold marketing where you've got that 10% opportunity of potentially getting to a face-to- face opportunity. Whereas, as you've said, and I share it all the time, when you're actually— and particularly with collaborative relationships, which is a type of referral marketing— is through those known relationships, those recommendations, you've got that opportunity of that 60 to 70%. So you're automatically increasing your results potential dramatically. And so I'm glad that you actually said that because I'm often saying that to my audience and they're probably rolling their eyes going, she's saying it again. I'm glad you've said it.

Well, maybe now they're rolling their eyes again that, oh God, she's brought somebody else on who's saying the same thing. But it's interesting you say that. I was having a— I got a recommendation which was very, very nice on a Facebook page just this morning. Okay, it's absolutely wonderful. But so did 30 other people. And I don't have— I have a relationship with the person who recommended me. She's lovely. You know, we've known each other for quite some time. But now I need to, you know, if I— when I want to chase that one down, I've got to try and get to this person. And I'm one of 30 other people that are trying to get to this person that wants the service. Now, don't let me understate the value of being tagged on Facebook or LinkedIn or anything like that. It's very, very valuable. It shows people that you care. It shows people that you're capable and all that kind of stuff. But still, the chances of you being viewed as just one of the herd and still this person who is the prospect, they're still standing in a smorgasbord and they've got all those people there. So yeah.

Yeah, it's time to ask the person that tagged you to do an email introduction,

I reckon. And this is it. So there's this hierarchy of communication whereby you can up the ante a little bit in terms of your likelihood of actually getting to that face-to-face conversation, which is the all-important conversation you've got to have.

Yeah, absolutely. So some of the areas that I'd love you to chat around are some of the common problems that you see out in the marketplace. And when I was looking at some of your training material, I love that you use the word of cringe factor. as it relates to selling, because so many people don't like actually selling themselves. And one of the other things that you talked about was the need to have a strategic approach and actually practice. So can you walk us through some of those elements as well?

Sure. So the cringe factor is always one of those fun ones, you know, whenever I'm in front of a group doing training of some description. You know, it's a common thing that I'll ask, you know, if it's, you know, a networking event and they've asked me to give a presentation or something, and I'll say, Hands up everyone who's come here to sell something tonight. And, you know, 50, 60% of hands go up, right? Yeah, exactly. And then you ask the next question, hands up everyone who's come here to buy.

Right question.

And there's absolutely no one that's there to buy, you know. And so the idea that, you know, you might be going there to pick up a lead or whatever like that, to me, that's It's perhaps the mindset issue that is at, you know, the problem that needs to be solved there, you know. And so talking with people about what they're actually, what's realistic to achieve before they walk into any type of networking event is a good place to start that conversation so that that cringe factor of being there and selling yourself doesn't ever exist because you're not there to sell anything. And that's one of the benefits of referral marketing as well that a lot of people talk to me about and, you know, I kind of, it's all over my website as well, is that if you're surrounded by 8, 10, 12, whatever it is, number of people that have got your best business interests at heart and you vice versa have their best interests at heart as well, you don't sell yourself. They sell you. And so, you get recommended by other people who are trusted in their networks by their colleagues, suppliers, whatever it is. And that's the great way of avoiding That cringe factor of, hey, Sally, want to buy a watch? You know, you don't want to do that. You don't want to be that guy, right? You don't want to be that person who's thinking like that. Because here's what happens, right? You go into these networking events like this and you are spotted in a heartbeat because of your body language, because of your demeanor, because of your hawkish eyes. Hawkish. Exactly. I'm gonna pin you to the wall and you're gonna buy my freaking watch, you know. And that's not what you want. So it presents opportunities to avoid that type of reaction and being able to move on. I'm sorry, Sal, in my elongated answer, I've forgotten the second part of your question.

That's all right, because you've actually— I'll repeat that for you. But what you've actually just reminded me of is one of your quotes that I also saw on your website, which was to turn your great reputation into referrals. referrals. And that's exactly the outcome that you've just discussed there. So the other, the other question was, you, you also talked about having a strategic approach, but you've actually mentioned the word practice. And again, my community is going to be rolling their eyes because I'm always going, practice, practice, practice, practice, practice. So I'm assuming that you're a practice, practice, practice, practice person as I am. So I'd love to talk around strategic approach and actually practicing the pitch or whatever you're going to be doing so you are comfortable with it, not so you sell something, but so you're comfortable with it.

Yeah, so one of the things that, you know, in one of the courses I've developed is developing a USP, okay, which is the unique service proposition. Many people out there in listener land will be familiar with that, but they forget the meaning of that first word, unique. I mean, and it's hard in this marketplace to actually be unique. There are so many accountants, bookkeepers, insurance brokers, whatever out there. And they just tend to want to fade into the background. And that is a huge strategy mistake. If you're at that smorgasbord and you don't stick out for all the right reasons, you're not likely to be the person who is selected. And that's even if you're not relying on referral marketing. All right. So, one of the great strategies before you walk into any networking room is to have that business asset in place in your mind or written down somewhere your, you know, in your marketing strategy is your unique service proposition. Okay. And so that when you are describing who you are and what you do and how you do it and why you do it and what drives you and all that kind of stuff, then you stand out as a person who actually cares about the outcome of the client. Yeah, it's great to get paid. We all love to get paid, but you're only gonna get paid if you're demonstrating to the client That you actually care about the outcome for them. And so many people forget that element, that humanness as a strategy. Okay. And it all comes down to stop being a robot and repeating yourself and dressing in your, you know, in stuff that makes you tight and constricted. Relax. Get out there and have fun with people and be a human. And that is one of the absolute best strategies you can employ. And then, but it takes practice, OK, because many, many people have come from corporate backgrounds, right? And in a corporate background, you know, it is a little bit, you know, tuck the suit in and look like everybody else and don't put a foot out of line. Otherwise, somebody will shoot you down because of the competitive nature of many corporate environments. So relaxing into being a human being, Is a great thing. And you do actually need to practice that. And then actually making that mental leap to become confident to do it is another factor as well. Okay. Because, yeah, okay, if that's your background, some sort of corporate background, and you have come to be a solopreneur or whatever that you currently are now, then that's the reaction that you know in your head. That's how you deal with stuff, is that corporate entity that you once were. Yeah. Go back to that person who first walked into that corporation. Become that person. That person who cares about outcomes, who cares about people, who isn't trying to climb a ladder and get over the top of other people, who is helpful, who is sincere, who is genuine, all those types of things. But like I say, it does take a little bit of practice. But having that USP, that unique service proposition, actually nutted down as a strategy that you can put into practice will help you magnificently in terms of building the relationships that actually matter.

Yeah, and I think too with what you said there, when you're coming from that care element and you've got your USP strategy worked out very, very well, then that can only actually increase your own level of confidence. Because the sort of work that I do with speakers and coaches as they're coming out there, they're always saying, I want to increase my confidence. Well, by caring more and being less rigid and being more playful, etc., then you do actually increase your own level of confidence because everything changes when you come from that place of care. So I'm glad you've actually mentioned those 2 words, care and confidence. So

thank you very much. And it makes you, it makes you more natural as well, you know. And so we, I mean, we've all got our radar up for someone that we think is bogus. And we all, as humans, we are so sensitively attuned to spotting someone who's false. We just spot them in a heartbeat when the verbal and the nonverbal messages are a mismatch. We just can't always put our fingers on it. Yep, exactly. We can't always put our fingers on it, but we always know, oh, there's something not right about Steve. I don't, or whoever it is you're talking to. And so, being genuine, Because you care is what's going to happen— is what's going to help you maximise these types of opportunities when they arise.

Beautiful. We'll go to a quick break in a minute, but I'm going to come back and ask you the question around what makes a great referral team and how does the referral team bridge into that care element. So we'll just nip to a quick break and then we'll get back to answering that question.

Sure.

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Welcome back. So now we're going to be talking about building or creating a referral team. So over to you, Steve, tell us about a referral team.

Well, referral teams are, they're not new, they've been around for a while in a variety of different ways and places and all that kind of stuff. You know, just picture the, I don't know, the ancient Greeks, the ancient Romans, they were quite the traders, weren't they? And they knew who they trusted and who they were associated with and all that kind of stuff. So it's not new. I'm not claiming to have invented this. But I suppose what has happened through the course of the centuries a little bit, I suppose, is that it's been kind of codified. The method of building them has been developed along the way. And anyway, so maybe that's what I'll start to talk a little bit about. And one of the first things you've got to realize about a referral is that it comes from someone else. Okay. So, that's one of the basic building blocks of understanding referral marketing. So, in order to build a team, it makes sense to surround yourself with the people who are best positioned to pass you referrals. And that is based on who you are and what you do. Okay. And so, think about, for example, you service the business-to-business target market. All right. So in that target market, there might be accountants, there might be bookkeepers, there might be insurance brokers, a lot of marketing people, blah, blah, blah, all the usual suspects, right? Because they service the same target market, then every customer of one of theirs is a potential customer of all of theirs. All right. And so let's just say for ease of arithmetic, you know, you got 10 different professions represented in a referral team and each of those has 100 colleagues, prospects, clients, whatever that are in their database, right? Alone, that's all they got, but together they've got 1,000. And when you build the relationship up to the point whereby it's, okay, I actually want to help your business sell, I actually want to learn about who you are and what you do and how I can help you because I know you want to do the same thing for me. Yeah. A lot of referral training in various organizations is about developing know, like, and trust. And they're great. They are 3 very, very important elements to it. But nothing is going to happen unless you want it to. So, you've got to develop know, like, and trust and desire to actually help everybody else out. And once you've developed the desire, and the desire comes from the knowledge that other people are helping you. Other people are going out and talking to their clients, their colleagues, their prospects, their whatever on your behalf and bringing them to you. And so, it's recognizing who your natural referral partners are is all based on having the same or similar target market. Because once you've got that sorted out, then that's how it rolls.

Yeah, or those that serve those before you and serve them after you. Yeah, I talk about a lot.

Yeah, yeah,

yeah. Beautiful. I was just gonna ask around that too, because lots of people don't, don't understand who they've got around them that do serve the same customers. And I think one of the missing elements, they all go, yeah, yeah, yeah, we can refer business to each other. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But they don't do any education to each other. So each other understands understands it enough to be able to speak in a caring and confident manner about that other business as well. So they'll think there's a— and that comes into that, as you've talked about, the desire element is they have to— you all have to have the desire to want to be able to do that, but you need to also have the desire to be able to do that with care and confidence.

You do, and those 2 elements come from educating yourselves about each other's businesses, you know. And so some people say, well, Steve, why don't you build referral teams of 30 or 40 or 50. Well, how many relationships can you really maintain? You know, whilst it's numerically possible, the, you know, as you get further away from, you know, the central people around you, the desire and the ability to maintain the relationships fades. And therefore, so does the ROI. Let's face it, we're business people. We want to put efforts into, you know, the things that we do that are going to actually bring us some return back, right? So, but yeah, And so, there's a large part of referral marketing which is actually just educational. And then through the provision of the education, that's where the rapport is developed as well. That's where you see the human being that runs the business as opposed to just the front person.

The facade.

Yes, exactly. And so, you get past the facade and let's face it, we all put it on to some degree, but the sooner you get past that, Then, you know, then you're dealing with the human and it's finding out their goals, their emotion, what drives them, all those types of things. That's what makes you want to help them. I want you to retire in the Bahamas, Sal. You know, how can I help you get there?

This made me shiver. I'm sitting here in front of my heater and you just mentioned the Bahamas and the sun and I shivered.

I feel your pain. I'm in Victoria.

Yeah, I can understand that. So I'd love for you to share some of your tips with the audience and the listeners as it relates to how do they actually become more or be more referable? What are your tips?

Sure. So I've mentioned one of them already, and that is, and it's in relation to business assets. And it's also in relation to something else that you said before too, you know, we're all cyber stalkers, you know, in a non-threatening, you know, nice kind of way. investigative type of way, right?

Yes.

Very, very nice. Yeah. Anyway, and so having some of the basic assets, business assets, like a USP, like having your website make you referable. And so I don't know about you, Sal, but sometimes, you know, you say you go check somebody out, right? Because that's what we do. And somebody may have been referred to you and you think, okay, just before I make contact or they make contact with me, I'm going to do this cyber stalking. And, you know, the person who referred Joe to you said wonderful things about Joe, but you're just thinking you're going to do your own little bit of investigation, right? So you go check out Joe's website and Joe's website kind of lets Joe down a little bit, right? And so immediately you've got a grain of salt growing in your mind about Joe's ability to actually do what this other person who referred him to you says he can do, right? And so having that business asset, your website, So I use a lot of technical language. All right. So having your website tickety-boo is going to help you to get to keep the referrals that have actually been given to you. And so there's a number of tips about that. We probably don't have time to go into it, but if anybody wants to contact me, then I'm sure they can find me anyway. But another one is your LinkedIn profile. All right. People will check you out on LinkedIn. Make sure it's good. Just make sure it's good. All right, make sure there's a human-to-human contact there because they want to deal with a human. That's what they want. And there's Facebook. All right, if you're on Facebook, if you use that, same type of thing. All right, make Get those business assets in place and actually have them as assets instead of detractions for you, because that's how you can actually help to seal the deal with the referrals that you're given. And then none of that even relates to going to events. Do you want me to work on about that for a little while? Oh,

absolutely. Yes, because I think events is a big area, whether they're doing online events or, as many of us are doing at the moment, networking online. A lot of people do rely on events and having collateral. It's one of the greatest— or one of the conversations around some of the greatest mistakes thought leaders wish that they did differently was to have the right collateral when somebody asked for it. So it amazes me still to this day how many people don't have a sales brochure or don't have something to take to meetings with them, which is all part of the education and leaving them with something element. So yeah, don't get me started on the collateral and assets thing. I'll go back to you as it relates to networking.

Well, and so, well, in relation to collateral, I can tell it's one of your favorite topics there. Here we go, Sal. Anyway, one of the things, and I made this mistake when I first started out, I absolutely made this mistake. Yeah. And we all make them, you know, okay. And it's, you know, we're all human. That's, and that's just the way it is. But I was going to a lot of networking events and I still do go to a lot of networking events. Just these days they're virtual, not in person. But anyway, when I went to a lot of the face-to-face ones, I was, you know, you're meeting people, you're having a good conversation with them. And, you know, it's time for the conversation to naturally draw to a close. And then it comes time to hand across business cards and to promise each other you'll follow each other up, right? And I was handed these magnificent business cards on thick card. There was embossed, you know, I could read them clearly. It was fantastic. And then I thought of what I had to drag out of my pocket and got embarrassed. I thought, oh, Steve, why didn't you spend the extra $40 or whatever it is? And we've all been there. We've all started out. But if you're, you know, when people need to make decisions about where they're going to put some investments in terms of their marketing collateral, you know, that's just life when you're a business person. Your website, your LinkedIn profile, your business cards. When you're trying to make a decision about what to invest in, think of those things because they are the elements that are freely out there and you need to be able to confidently dip into your pocket Pull out your business card and hand it over with confidence and self-assurance, knowing that the other person isn't going to look at it and think, well, that's going in the bin. You absolutely want that. So having just that really, really simple business card, your name, your contact details, and a little bit on the back about some of the problems you solve, the services you provide, whatever, but that type of thing.

Yeah, all helps to build confidence and care in yourself, I think, by having the right collateral. And actually, as you said, also helps to build that trust element. So let's perhaps circle back because we talked about trust quite a lot at the beginning. And let's have a chat now as to how trust can either accelerate referrals and the ways in which you see that the levels of trust that you talk about And the types of strategies that you bring into referral marketing can actually help amplify that trust element.

Sure. So the absolute best way to— I mentioned before this communication hierarchy, okay? And so when you're starting out with people, the sooner you can get to a face-to-face conversation of some description, the sooner you can be visible to the person that you're talking to instead of an email, a text, a social media comment or post or whatever like that, that will very, very quickly help to elevate their level of trust in you. As long as you're doing it right and coming across properly and naturally and genuinely and all that kind of stuff. But you've got to get to that nature of conversation first. And these days, of course, we need to be behind keyboards for obvious reasons. We don't get to go out as much as we did. But one of the other things you can do when you are selecting the types of events to go to, because this is where the trust is sort of at its initiation phase, right? Make sure you contact the event organizer. If people take only one thing away from today, let it be this. Before you go to any event, be it virtual or face-to-face, contact the event organizer. Make sure the people that you want to talk to are there. Make sure you get an understanding of the flow of how the event is going to go, be it virtual or face-to-face. And, you know, because there might be some sponsors talking for a while. There might be some other presentation. And there's mingling time and all that kind of stuff. All right. And if it's online, which a lot of them are right now, of course, then they are— make sure there are breakout rooms.

Yeah.

If there are no breakout rooms, the ability to build trust with anybody is way low. It is absolutely way low, you know, because otherwise, you're, you know, you're a face on the screen with 40 other people or whatever it is, you know, and you're just going to get lost in the crowd. Yeah, OK, you can text people. Digital. OK, a digital kind of message. Low level in terms of, you know, the building of trust. It's something, but it's low level, right? But if you can get into a breakout room with 3 4 or 5 other people, whatever it is, and you can have real meaningful conversations with people. That's where you can start accelerating trust as well and swapping your details, putting an email address in the chat box or whatever the opportunities are for that platform. And then you can help to— and that will help you then to cement the next thing.

Yes.

Because you haven't gone there to sell anything. Because we've already spoken about that, haven't we? Anyway, you haven't gone there to sell anything. You've gone there to initiate or develop relationships that already exist. And so, and if you're in the initiation phase or the development phase, then the actual purpose of going to a networking event is to ascertain who it is you're going to follow up with.

Yeah.

Because if all you do is go there and have a virtual connection, or you shake a hand or whatever it is, I can guarantee Absolutely nothing is going to happen for either of you.

I'm going to be cheeky and say that's called coffee and kisses.

Exactly. And there are some people that call it ninja networking. So they rock up with their business cards and they're going, thing, thing, thing, thing, thing. Yeah, doing all that kind of stuff. And absolutely nothing is going to come of it. I was dealing with a client a little while ago who said, it was an insurance broker, said, Steve, mate, he said, I don't get it. I'm going to all these networking events. I'm meeting so many people, you know, 30, 40 people at each of these events. We're exchanging cards and nothing ever happens. Nothing ever happens because there was never a human connection. Yeah, there was never a human connection. So in terms of, you know, still answering your question, building that trust and getting it to the next phase, if you're the purpose of going to any networking event, face-to-face or virtual, if you make the purpose of it to get to the next phase and have a one-to-one conversation with somebody, then your results are going to be so much better than if you just bring a few cards around and then rest on your laurels waiting for your phone to ring.

Waiting for them to come running through the door.

Yes, because they don't know who you are. They ain't gonna come running.

No, that's exactly right. One of the things that just that you mentioned there, and I loved around the events, was obviously speaking to the organizer. And that's something that I've generally always done, as you said, to check out who's in the room to make sure I'm actually attending the right event. But I got caught out probably about 12 months ago because it was during COVID because I've jumped into the US market. And I asked the right question, was the right people in the room, etc.? And what was the the flow, you know, they do. And she talked about doing the breakout rooms because I knew how important that was. But one thing that I didn't ask, mind you, I didn't know what the— wasn't sure what the right question at the time was. Because their version of a USB or their pitch question was very different to what we did in Australia, and I got completely caught out. Right. So we do a 30-second pitch. It's usually, you know, this is what I do, blah, blah, blah. But in the States, they actually do a 2-minute pitch.

Wow.

Yeah. And so to give context, that's actually a full A4 sheet of paper. Um, but so I've had my, you know, crappy little 30-second pitch with, you know, no, no meat or anything to go with it. And just listening to theirs, the level of connection I got, the level of understanding about who they are, what they specialize in, who their clients are, what sort of clients they're looking for, a little bit of their background, some of their fun stuff. It was actually a really different experience because I really felt like I connected with somebody. So, A, that was a mistake on my part. I didn't know what their functionality was as far as the USP or the length of time. But falling flat on my face, I came, brought that back to Australia and said, you know, This is what they do in the US. And as you said, from building trust, my experience was I was actually much deeper connected with people because I got to hear more about them.

And isn't that amazing? Because it's that, it's that depth of the, of the relationship that's going to lead to something else. You know, and there are so many organizations in Australia, we all know who they are. And they often have This 30, this 45, this 1-minute pitch, whatever it might be. But it becomes a pitch.

Robotic.

Yes, because they're scripted in terms of a template to follow. I used to teach it, but I've gone in a different direction because I don't want you to be robots. Anyway, but the idea is, if you, and you're quite right, if you've got a little bit longer, you can get to to the emotional connection as opposed to just, this is who I am, this is what I do, this is how I make your life better type of thing. Because it's that emotional connection that actually makes people take action. Yes. As opposed to, I talk about this when I'm talking about how to have the closing conversations with people. And it's, so you run them, you run people through a story, you listen to their, you've already heard their pain points, what's bothering them and all that kind of stuff. And one of the things I've learned with the communications with the doctors, and there's obviously more to it than I've got time to go into here, but it's, uh, we talk about not just, uh, the problem, all right? Because a problem is a problem. We've all got problems and we're all living with them too, right? We're not in a position where we're prepared to take action, right?

Yeah.

But when you start talking about the effects of the problem— sleeplessness, irritability, um, I'm kicking the cat, You know, anxiety, stress, those types of things. Those are the types of things that make people take action because they don't want to live with it. Yeah. But reminding them, and it's only the people that are actually suffering from these things that will take action. But you just talk about a problem, everyone's got problems. Start talking about the effects of the problem, it's a whole different ballgame.

Yeah, huge takeaway for everyone there. Talk about the effects of the problem, not just the problem, just as a bit of a recap there. So thank you. So Steve, how can people get in contact with you?

They can get onto my website, referralacademy.com.au. They can see what I do there. They can also email me, which is info@referralacademy.com.au. And if they want to get on the phone, because let's face it, there are various levels of communication, if they want to get on the phone, then that's fine too, 0459 412 521.

Beautiful. And so notice there, there was much more offer for a human connection. So just, just making sure it everyone's caught that one as well. So as we go towards the, uh, towards the close, we've got a couple more minutes left. I'm gonna— um, oh yeah, thank you, Peter. Peter's just said great tips, um, Steve, and thank you. So with the last few minutes, I'm going to give you your soapbox.

Okay.

Go on your little rant and tell people what, um, some more, you know, what, what do they need to hear? What's the biggest takeaway that they need to hear as it relates to growing their business through referrals?

Be yourself, you know. So be yourself is absolutely the most important thing because people are going to find out who you are anyway. So the sooner you become yourself, and this takes confidence, it absolutely does, but the sooner you become yourself, you become something or a person other people can care about. And that is what drives their activity to want to help you. Yeah. If you're someone who goes around pretending your life is perfect and there's no need for anybody to help you, then you're putting up a barrier. It's okay to be imperfect. It's okay to be vulnerable. We all are. It's fine. Get over yourself. I mean, you don't want to turn into a crying sap every time you walk into a room. That's not what I'm talking about here. But it's okay to have problems. It's okay to have problems because once you've got a problem, you know, the human condition is for somebody to want to give you a solution, right?

Yeah.

Or point you in the direction of a solution. So hopefully that wasn't too soapboxy, but in terms— Sorry. But in terms of things that can generate better quality results, that's a good one. And here's another one. I don't know if I've got time, Sal. Might take about a minute.

Yeah.

Okay. So another thing is, so whenever I give a training session, all right, it's, you know, training is great. I love doing it. And people, you know, in the audience or, you know, whatever the situation is, love hearing it. And it's a lot of fun and all that kind of stuff, right? But at the end of the day, I can stand up in front of a whole group of people and impart a whole bunch of knowledge and put you through a whole bunch of different workshops so that you're acquiring knowledge and you're practicing stuff and all that kind of stuff. All right. And in that kind of environment, it's, you know, it's wonderful. It's safe. It's secure. You're not risking anything. But then you go out into the big bad world. They've learned into practice.

Yeah.

Until they do this. Here's where they are over here on the left, and over here on the right is where they'd rather be. And in between where they are on the left And where they would rather be on the right is a whole bunch of awkward.

Yes.

You absolutely have to go through awkward to become the person that you want to be, who's getting the results, who's going to retire on a beach in the Bahamas. Okay. Now, as adults, we get less and less able or desirous of actually wanting to take a risk. We want to stay this small person because this person doesn't get embarrassed. This person doesn't get stretched. This person doesn't get uncomfortable. Yeah, this person may not be getting results either. It's okay if you're happy there. If you're happy there, that's great. But if you're not happy there and you stay there, that's where futility and regret live.

Live.

As children, we stood up, we fell down. We stood up, we fell down. We stood up, we fell down. We stood up, we took 2 steps. We fell down. We stood up, we took 5 steps, we fell down. We all learned how to walk, right? But as we became older, our egos got in the way and we stopped wanting to, or, you know, being exposed to falling down because, oh, I've made a fool of myself and everyone's seen it, you know.

Yeah.

You gotta go through awkward, and going through awkward means that you gotta put education training into practice and just having a crack. You know, just being that genuine person. Yeah, given being that genuine person, because you want to be this person over here on the right who is now proficient at the skills you've just been practicing. And that proficiency is what's going to give you the results.

Beautiful. Well said. Thank you. Beautiful soapbox moment. Thank you very much. From my perspective, just a couple of things that I'm a prolific note-taker. So I've written, and the whole element of networking is to have the purpose of getting to the next step, which is a face-to-face humanized interaction. I've also written down and said, so I've got circles around certain elements. The other one is educate your referral team and spend, invest good quality time in doing that. And the last massive takeaway for me was practice.

Yeah.

So thank you very, very much, Steve. It's been an absolute pleasure and an honor to have you on sharing your insights today. Thank you so much. And we will look forward to seeing everybody next week on next week's episode. Big, big thank you to Steve.

It's been my pleasure, Sally. Thank you very much for having me on. I've really appreciated the opportunity. Thank you very much. And I hope everybody got something out of it.

Lovely. Thank you so much. Take care.

Okay, bye everyone.

That's it for this week's episode. Thank you so much for joining us. I trust you got some inspirational tips to move you forward. See you next Thursday at 7 PM Eastern for more Success Secrets Exposed.