Success Secrets Exposed - Understanding yourself for Personal & Professional Growth

The topics and opinions expressed on the following show are solely those of the hosts and their guests and not those of W4WN Radio, its employees, or affiliates. We make no recommendations or endorsements for radio show programs, services, or products mentioned on air or on our web. No liability, explicit or implied, shall be extended to W4WN Radio, its employees, or affiliates. Any questions or comments should be directed to those show hosts. Thank you for choosing W4WN Radio.

Welcome to Success Secrets Exposed with Sally A. Curtis, where we share stories of challenge, success, and inspiration along with practical tips and strategies to move you forward to your success. And now here's your host, Sally A. Curtis.

Good evening, good morning, and g'day to you all. Welcome back to another episode of Success Secrets Exposed. Today we're going to be talking about all things understanding yourself, for business growth and personal growth. And I'm super excited because I do have a guest coming on today that you've— we've had on the show before, uh, Gary Prigg from Who Am I Dynamics. So we'll be talking to him shortly about this topic of understanding yourself so you can get the level of business growth that you're looking for through the level of personal growth that you take yourself through as well. So for those that are new to the show, I'm a marketing strategist for speakers, coaches, and consultants, and it is my role to help you amplify your voice, your message, and your impact. And we do this in a number of ways. We help you to repurpose your content so you can gain more visibility and credibility online through shining through your inner genius. And we also help our clients with some LinkedIn lead generation and profile writing. So that's just a little bit on me, but more importantly, let me tell you a little bit more about Gary. So Gary is a life— sorry, a transformational life master. He has an extensive business background, which I'll just give you a little tidbit on now, and Gary will certainly share a little bit more. So he's been in business and around business for a long time. He's been a CEO, he's been a board member, He's been a business innovator as well as a mentor, mentor and advisor to very, very large businesses. He has extensive background in the property arena, certainly helping lots of people get into their first home as well. He's done 20-plus years in the disability arena, particularly with children and adults with cerebral palsy, and he's going to provide his insight as to why that's become so significant for the work that he's been doing in the last sort of 6 or 7 years, as it relates to helping people transform their lives through understanding how these children have actually been able to transform and relearn things so they can grow and adapt into a new life as well. So without any further ado, please help me welcome Gary Brig back to the show.

Good morning, Sally, and good morning to your— or anywhere in the world— to your international audience. Great to see you again.

Yeah, likewise. Great to have you back. And as you so aptly put it, to dance across the airwaves and channels, etc., today. And another great topic to be sharing with you today. So thank you for joining me again.

Great to be here.

Can I ask you to just share a little bit more of the details of your background? Because there is quite a lot of depth to your business background, particularly as it relates to business. And then we'll sort of transform it into how that relates to understanding yourself and getting the growth that people are looking for.

Thanks, Sally. Yeah, I've had over nearly 40 years experience in industry, in business. And one of the things that I'm blessed to have experienced is being a chairman of a board, right down to running my own business. So that I've seen the spectrum from the top of the apex right down to the grassroots where I love working as well. What's really important, it doesn't matter whether it's the peak of the apex as a CEO or a chairman of a board or running your own one-man business. The reality is, if you do not seek additional information and knowledge, you will fail, or you will be mediocre, or you'll, you'll work for 40 years and find that you've made little progress in fulfilling the gift that we all have within. It's really important. You need to be able to define who you are yourself within, personally, personally. And then from there, you apply those principles into your work, whether you own your own business or You are an employee seeking to climb the ladder of influence within the company you work for or another one at a later date.

And I think you've touched on a really beautiful scenario there. It's that ever-expanding and absorbing of knowledge, which is where we actually create influence. Using those 2 words, knowledge and influence, I think go hand in hand. And that the ability to influence your own understanding, which then helps create your own growth, which then ripples across to the business that you work for or the business that you're building. So can you share some of the background, um, as it relates to the insights that you've got with working with the children with cerebral palsy?

Sure.

And that's, um, how that's led you to where you are now, because obviously you've been on your own self-discovery journey as well, um, as the rest of us. Um, so can you highlight some of those elements?

Sure. So about 30 years ago, I became involved with children with cerebral palsy. And these were children at the age of 12 months to about 18 months. And I mean, these were the most severe and multiply disabled children. Excuse me. Sorry, Sally. Just 2 seconds, Sally.

I know what that's like.

I had a big— couple of big sessions with clients on the phone last night. Sorry. So what I saw was these little children aged 12 months to 18 months of age, very severe cerebral palsy is caused by lack of oxygen to the brain at birth, during birth, or just after birth as well. So part of the brain dies, never recovers. So watching these children learn over time with programs That would teach them to put their feet flat on the floor, learning to push through their feet, one day being able to stand, then take steps, even with a stick, or then with a walker. All those times it was independent. But what I realised after I'd left my association with the organisation is that we are all affected by our neurocognitive pathways. Mm-hmm. So children who were unable to use their bodies in an able-bodied way could be taught, or their brains could be taught, how to interact and take a leadership role in the way that their body would work. So I saw that as an analogy in business or in life, that people who have been influenced by their genetic inheritance or their environmental background can rewire their mind, their brain, so that they can create a whole new different life scenario. And that is one of success, one of happiness, one of joy, one of love, instead of being caught in the quagmire of the historical past that has influenced their life up until now.

Yeah. Beautiful. So that sort of ties into the, the, the The rituals and the daily habits and the practices that you hear that success— that successful people have. Yes, it's a practice or a meditation or something that they're doing repetitively. But, uh, the, the scenario also marries across that by doing, uh, repeating tasks or repeating knowledge or creating, uh, mini or micro steps, you actually create your own achievement. It creates that forward movement. It's that repetitiveness. It's the rewiring, the recreation of new habits or new pathways, as you say.

Yeah. And that's critical, Sally, because with our mind, it's already preset, and we can continue to play that script out. But with the changing of how we create our thinking, so There's an old saying, and I coached cricket, junior cricket, for a long time, and I remember hearing this fellow say practice makes perfect. I realized that was wrong. Practice does not make perfect. If you are practicing a bad habit, a bad technique, all you've got to do is enhance that technique and you will reach a level where over that you'll fall over the edge because you don't have the fine-tuned skills. So In my world, with my clients as transformational masters, what they seek to do and what they achieve is, is to literally write up their own life plan.

Hmm.

Life plan comes before anything in business because it defines who you choose to be. And then by building a ritual— now, not everyone's going to be like I am. I have a ritual that takes me through for an hour in the morning and an hour at night, sometimes longer. But even having a ritual for 10 or 15 minutes every day can, once you've built your plan, can then by habit and practice embedded into your mind so that you then have a reference point to go to. So when something comes up, the old mindset says, oh, we go this way, and that's the only option you have. However, if you build this new program embedded When that choice comes up, you can either go to the old mindset software program, most times, which is about failure, fear, limitation, or you can go to your new mindset software program. That's the one that you've created and repeated and with ritual embedded. So you now have a reference point that encourages success, encourages you to listen, learn, observe. And then you'll be— people are astounded how quickly that kicks in. People see them differently. They start to get what I call miraculous milestones in their life, big and small. But it's all about stopping and recreating a new mindset software program. So, for example, if you and I are traveling somewhere and put the GPS on, we know our destination.

Yeah.

Now, on that, on that destination, if the traffic is heavy, we can deviate around. And go some other way. That's the way business is. But it's knowing your destination that is critical, then putting it in your own GPS, so to speak. And you know what GPS stands for, don't you, Sally? Gary Prigg Strategies.

I've

done that before. But so yeah, your GPS to get to your destination. And by getting to your destination, it can take a long time or it can take a short time, but it's all predicated on having plans, day-to-day plans, week to week, month to month, so that at the end of every week, I spend 2 hours assessing my performance of what I've done during the week. Successes, things to do, things that I have missed out on doing that I've got to recalibrate and put back on the list.

Yeah.

So having a plan is imperative.

Yeah. And having that top, the top of, top of mind. You made me laugh when you were talking about GPS because I have Siri on my phone. So she's my GPS. And her and I have arguments quite regularly because I know she is not taking me the fastest route. And then when we get into it and I've argued with her, I end up in the traffic where the roadworks are versus I had— had I listened and followed and gone through, we might have actually gone around those, um, though the, the, the traffic, uh, problem or the roadworks or whatnot. So it's about, um, in that scenario, sort of turning your voice off or my voice off to argue, arguing with Siri and just following the plan and getting into, uh, what I would call that flow, more of that flow state versus the, um, the force state.

Correct. And, and look, in business, if, if you have your own, and I call it your own life plan, and that just does not include business, it's a whole range of things, whether it be relationship, money, um, you know, spirituality, things you wanna learn. But once you've got that embedded As to the way you want to live your life, you then pick that up and roll that into your business because you're clear about what you desire for yourself. And once you're clear on that, you then start to apply those principles into your business.

Yeah.

And the relationship that you will change with your staff or your fellow employees, it is again one of those miraculous milestones. Things change because you change.

Yeah. And very, very quickly. So when it comes to, um, if we, if we start exploring the self, because obviously it's the self that then makes a difference, uh, within the business, because I was going to be cheeky and say to you, so let's talk about business transformation. Then I thought, no, no, no, because Gary will catch me up on that and he'll go, no, no, no, business transformation will start with the individual. So let's— Correct. Yeah, exactly. And certainly been my experience, um, with working with you and certainly seeing it the work that other clients have done as it relates to forming daily habits, et cetera, as well. So what are some of the things, um, that are missing for people, uh, when they're sort of wishing and wanting and hoping for change and transformation, but they just are feeling— I'll use the term rudderless. They're sort of, they're, um, not quite satisfied. They, they're happy, but they know, but they know there could be more. And they've, they're looking for that sort of, they're not. They just know that there's more inside them. What's the starting point? What's the tipping point for those people to help recognize what they can do as their first step?

Okay, step 1 is, and I'll use this quote, and I've used it for many years. Over the years, I've learned many things. I've gained much knowledge, skill, and expertise. With age comes wisdom. And this is my wisdom. The more I learn is the realization of how little I know. So it's having a hunger and a thirst to learn new things.

Mm-hmm.

It's also important to talk to someone outside your business or outside your work environment, outside your, your relationship environment, because you're only seeing the world from your habitual environment.

Mm-hmm.

So getting someone outside to come and talk to you and to listen to what you're doing, then step 1, What are your desires in life? Not what you want, need, must have. They're words in quantum physics space that say you don't have it. So what do you desire in your life? And the desiring in your life is in space first for relationship with yourself. What do you desire that's going to make you happy, that's going to make you feel fulfilled and free? So in that space, We would go through a whole process of downloading what hasn't worked, then rolling into what you desire. Now, where the area of what has not worked, we don't go back and fix anything. The more energy you focus in on what's not working in quantum physics space, the more you will give it energy, and it will continue to manifest and grow in the not working space. However, If you define what your desires are in your personal life, and for example in business, if you if you define what those desires are, you can then focus on them. They are written down every morning. I'll sit down and write out what they are. They'll be part of my meditation practice. So I'm embedding them. So instead of focusing on what doesn't work. We focus on what our desires are. And in focusing what those desires are, you build strategies around them. You actually write down, get it out of your head and write down what you desire in your business, but then reach out. So for example, if someone's looking to grow their business in the space of— and I'll use you, Sally, you know, you're one of the leaders in that field. If they're trying to utilize their LinkedIn business If they're trying to do it themselves and they're doing the Google, if they don't bring in and source a skilled, competent leader in that space, if they don't do that, they're going to go really slow or they're going to muck it up and waste a lot of money.

Yeah.

So in business, it's about setting aside a budget that you can put towards someone with a skill that you don't have. That doesn't mean you have to spend Hundreds of thousands of dollars, but every month dedicate a certain amount of money to a person that's going to enhance and upskill you and your business.

So let's just— there's a couple of key things that you've actually said in there and key buzzwords that Sally likes. We talked about fresh eyes, having— bringing somebody in with fresh eyes to help you self-assess, but self-assess through your own conversations and doodling or journaling, et cetera. Um, and I do find that people, um, especially in the early days when I had more of the coaching practice as opposed to more of the agency, is people, um, really don't understand or haven't taken the time to actually really dig into what it is that they're actually really good at. Um, and therefore, because they don't know what they're good at, they then don't know what they perhaps should be doing or what they then desire. So they sort of get stuck in this spot of being stuck because they're trying to look at it, uh, with their own lens versus getting, speaking with somebody and having a fresh perspective with a new, new lens to help you flesh it out. Because from my own experience, uh, and I see this all the time, uh, we don't, we don't actually appreciate and value our own, our own inner genius elements, because they're so effortless for us, we don't think that they've got any, that they might, they're not valuable. Um, but, and we see the inner genius in others going, oh wow, look what they can do. They do it so well. Not realizing that that very same person is thinking the same of us because we've all got very specific skill sets and what we admire in others, we've often got it, got in us. within ourselves anyway. Um, but it's, it's that starting point of getting unstuck is sort of really helping somebody, helping you discover who you really are and then perhaps who you're really wanting to be. And then through that, what are you wanting to do, do with that? So do you find similar things that people have those similar sort of roadblocks before, um, they get to that point of being able to get down to their desires and their life plans? Gary?

Look, one of the blocks I think for many people, Sally, is that they don't know what they don't know, but they think they know it all. And I can remember back in 2015, whilst everyone said I've been a very successful person, both in business, in the area of supporting children with cerebral palsy, I actually stopped and said, I'm going to pretend I don't know anything. So I booked myself into a full-day workshop with a fellow called Simon Reynolds. Simon Reynolds had sold his business some years back for $700 million.

Yeah.

Now that is a huge— that's just so far away from where I was. But then I thought, well, why not meet someone and listen to them that has done that journey? Now, I sat in that workshop for a full day in March 2015. I took about 18 pages of notes. He came back 6 months later and I sat in on exactly exactly the same workshop and I took another 17 pages of notes. Both were different. Yeah. So my listening had changed, my application had changed, but it just opened my world up to think that what I know is so small. So every fortnight I encourage businesses to listen to a podcast— excuse me— a podcast of something that's of value to your business.

Mm-hmm.

Or if you have a really good confidant, if, if you talk to them once a week about what you're doing and get them to listen for an hour, those people will open you up because everybody has an inner genius. Absolutely everybody. And the genius that we have is to listen to other people, open them up to say, tell me what you feel I could do better. And by peeling away the outside, you find what your life desire is. And once you find what your life desire is, that as long as that life desire fits in the space of enrichment of other people.

Hmm.

So you build yourself as an edifice of knowledge, of commitment to other people. And then as you take your business or your, if you're in a charity or whatever, you then have the chance to enrich the lives of others. So grow self, then learn about self, take that into your own life well beyond. So you just expand it so that you actually enrich the lives of others. And if you're focused on the enrichment of others, you are guaranteed to be successful. It's a promise. It will happen.

Yeah, absolutely. That's given me some good insights and some reminders for myself. I've got Uh, 2 little stories just from an everyday perspective. Um, I'm going to say to everyone that's listening, how many times have you watched, um, one of your favorite movies? And as you start watching it, uh, so I'm a repeated, uh, movie watcher. I love watching the same movie over and over again. But how many times have you actually watched, uh, your favorite movie and gone, I don't remember that bit. Oh, I don't remember that bit either. Correct. And that's, as you said, that's that, you know, that self-evolution and that Uh, realization that you're now listening and hearing, um, differently. And I've also got another, another funny story. I watched, um, uh, the, um, Steve Jobs, uh, the Stanford, um, ceremony when he's at Stanford University, uh, talk that goes for about 18 minutes. And it was with my ex-partner at the time, and we both sat down and watched it. And I heard all of the relationship elements that were discussed within it, and he heard all of the business bits in it. And we actually then were discussing it afterwards, and he didn't hear any of the bits that I heard, and I didn't hear any of the bits that he'd heard because we were seeing exactly the same information, but we were skewing it based on what we were seeking or what we were wanting to understand, which was very, very different. And so that's where the, as you said, sort of seeking out people that have been there and done it, experience as you did with Simon, um, and, uh, people that have, uh, able to and willing to listen to you to help you, uh, discover, um, the things that are inside you for yourself. So I think that's very, very important.

And it's getting out of your own head as well. If you're getting out of your own head and engaging with the energy of other people, your listening changes because you are picking up new things as you just talked about watching that movie. So as you are engaging with new people, they bring in new insights. You hear differently, you think differently. And what happens? You grow the menu of who you are. You take that into your business. It's impossible for your business not to grow.

Yeah, beautiful. And I absolutely agree with how quick those— what did you call them? The miraculous milestones.

Yeah.

people have changed and how quickly you just have a little bit of an insight or a bit of growth for yourself. And then you go into a workplace or an environment or even the family environment, and then the dynamics change. So can you tell us some stories about, um, you know, some of those little dynamic changes occur for people when they just make a little transformation of their own?

Well, I'll give you 3 quick examples. These are 3 clients that have been doing the program, the Transformational Mastery Program. And within 2 weeks, the 3 of them said, I need more money. I said, well, no, you don't need anything. You have a desire for more money. Well, have you written it down? I just desire more money. And how much? Oh no, we haven't. I said, well, come on. This is what this program is about. So anyway, they wrote down what their desire was for more money. One lady, because of COVID lockdown, was really struggling. She was getting the JobKeeper, that was fine. She focused on it for 24 hours. She got a phone call from her employer saying, listen, you've been really valuable, you've been doing some great stuff, we have a bonus for you of $2,000. Is that okay?

Hmm.

So that just— but it's getting in that mindset. Then another one of my clients, and this young gentleman's been with me for 5 years, he's 22 years of age. Extraordinary young man. He was saying that where he's working, he was unhappy because he wasn't being recognized financially. So I said, why don't we focus on what you're worth? And he said, but they won't listen. I said, yes, they will if you write it down and have the conversation. So he wrote it down. The next day we went back into work, they offered him an extra $100 a week. So it's opening a conversation with the universe And making a request because that's where all energy, everything already exists out there in the space of quantum physics. So if you ask for it, what happens if you receive it? Things start to fast track.

Yeah.

Everything that you seek, if you, if you focus in on asking for it, you will receive it. Now I've got a, a new client, and I've gotta say, she would have to be perhaps one of the most extraordinary people I've ever met in my life. She was a world champion, uh, in her respective sporting field, elite business leader, one of the greatest brains I've met. And yet in the fulfillment of who she is, her next step up is being able to focus in on herself. And even in the short space of 24 hours for her, She's opened up now where she's actually tilted the paradigm of who she is and her life has changed. And so, as I said earlier, Sally, if people come to you to get advice on, you know, how to utilize LinkedIn, they add value to who they are. Yeah. And the same with people when I talk to them, if they define who they are, create— and I have 7 pillars of what I call 7 pillars that if people want to learn more, you focus in on the learning. If you want to become spiritual, you focus in on the spiritual. If you want to be a volunteer in community, focus on community, your relationships. Then there's money, there's business, and your physical well-being. And all of those are encapsulated within the Transformational Mastery. And by being able to write them down, I do see daily Miraculous miracles, these milestones that people achieve. And after a while, when people ring me, they don't even bother to say to me, hey, Gary, you're not gonna believe this, because they know I'm gonna believe it because I see it happen daily.

Daily. Yeah. I, I think that's one of the, the great, uh, beauties of the conversations we've had. And certainly the, the insights that I wanna give, give the audience is, uh, the, the, the ability to focus on even the fundamentally tiny little things that you want to do. So an example of my own was I've always wanted a business, um, a business family. I always thought my business family was going to be my partners or life partners that I would, would with, and we would get, we would build, uh, you know, uh, a business around those sorts of things. Um, but with some, with that clarity and writing the elements down of what I was looking for, I didn't know what I didn't know. I didn't know what it could look like, or I just knew what I wanted. Mm-hmm. Um, but through that, you know, through— and we talked about collaborative partnerships and all the rest of it— a lot of that has transpired for me. But what I want to share with the audience was I've wanted that for a very long time. I didn't know how to express it, and I, and I therefore I didn't. I didn't have anything written down. And I don't know how many times you've— we've been to, you know, starting the new year and, you know, write your goals down, but we, you know, you don't actually really write anything that's really I'm going to call it deep and meaningful, that's transformational enough for you. Um, but just having the insights of sort of writing some of those elements down of, you know, how, how do I want to show up in the world? Therefore, you know, who do I want to attract into the, into my world? What do they need to, what are some of the characteristics that they look for or I look for and those sorts of things? Um, and writing those elements down helped me discover what I didn't No, I didn't know. Uh, and therefore I was then able to focus, as you said, uh, on what I was actually looking towards or forward for. Um, whereas before I had, you know, I just had nothing. Um, and it brings me back to the saying that I heard of, you know, if a man stands on mountaintop with a mouth open waiting for roast duck to fly in, he's going to have a very long wait. And that was effectively what I was doing. I was just waiting, going, well, where is it? But I didn't know what the where or the what was. So it's around having some form of focus. And from a little bit of focus with a few keywords and a few key elements or emotions or feelings that you're looking for will actually build on the next series of words or elements. And then you start to be able to map out and get that, that clear picture of who you, um, who you are and then what you're looking to be able to provide for others, which then of course relates, transposes over into the business realm of awesome. I'm actually now able, I'm this person that does these awesome things that helps these people in this way. This is the way I'd be of service. So I just want to express that sort of really that, um, it comes back to that. We hear it all the time, focus, but I think as humans, We overcomplicate it. It's, you know, yeah. So,

so, Sally, if we do a quick, if we may do a quick modeling here, because I know that your vast audience, a lot of those people are in business and are seeking to elevate who they are in business and become successful. So if we were to do a quick checklist of things, and reality is most people will spend around 40 years working. Now, with those 40 years that they're working, they're spending about 12 hours a day from the time they leave work— leave to go to work and get home at night. That's 12 hours. So what if they hate getting up in the morning and heading out to work? If that's like it is every day, they've got 40 years of living this. Or, you know, are they enthusiastic about where they work? You know, do they work in the leadership group? Are they on a team? Or do they just kind of sit on the peripheral edge of being in their business. And I love asking people this question. So when you get home from work, would you like to meet yourself when you walk in the front door?

Some days, no.

Absolutely. So if, you know, if you've got a partner and children and you are walking through that front door with the, the weight of the world, the weight of what's happened during the day, And you haven't even liked going to work in the morning and you've lived it during the day and it's just not uplifting. What are you bringing back into the home?

Hmm.

What does that do to the family life? So, you know, the person comes in, they are already psychologically exhausted. They haven't enjoyed their day. They haven't enjoyed their life. They come home, they slop down their dinner, they get on the couch, they sloth it out. Come 10 o'clock, oh, it's time for bed. And dog, what happens? Everything gets repeated next morning.

Yeah.

Now, if that's the way people wanna live, that's their choice, but there are options to get off that. So, you know, if, if, if that's the way people wanna live, that's great. But if, if we were to look at what is the option and look at your work life where you spend most of your time, and just on that, when you come home at night, If you've been driving, before you get out of the car, look in the rear-vision mirror and have a look at yourself. Is that the face that you would like to greet you if you walked in the front door?

Sorry, that's all right, you keep going. I've got a little story to add to that which I can't remember. Keep going.

So if what you see is what you're going to be confronted with if you went in the front door, would you open the front door? and wrap your arms around that person, give them a kiss, pass them a glass of wine, say, hi, hi, hi babe, great to see you.

Yeah,

no, you probably find, you know, I'd be out in the laundry somewhere wanting to just hide myself. They're getting ready to peg the washing out.

Yes. Yeah, yeah. You've just reminded me, and I can't remember, I think I've probably shared this story with you personally, but I can't remember whether I've shared it on, on the radio, uh, on the, on the show before. But it was a period when I was actually working and I wasn't happy, and I was at angry person that everyone wanted to avoid when I walked in the front door.

You, you angry? I could not imagine that, Sal.

Yeah, yeah, you can't now, but back then, not nice. Um, but the boys actually— this is Rory and my partner at the time— coined the phrase, especially when we sat down at dinner, that— and I didn't know this had been going on for a while, and then they did, they were brave enough to say, say, say something, which obviously then brought it to my awareness and we changed some things. But they used to go, oh God, we're going to get angry cooking tonight. And I can assure you, angry cooking did not taste good and it was a foul, foul thing. Um, but they actually noticed the difference in the level of care and love that I would give the cooking when we were— when I was making food for them versus mum's in a really angry space and we're going to get angry cooking tonight. And it— and yeah, the angry cooking. God awful, let me tell you.

But actually, that's such a good— that's a great example. So if there's angry cooking, when you're cooking, they're not only observing you, they're picking up on your energy. You are angry. You're emitting that. So if you have the angry— you can— we can use this, Sal. If you have the angry cooking model in your workspace where you're working,

yeah,

are people going to be magnetized towards you? Are they going to push back from you?

Yeah. Not pleasant. No. Yeah.

So we're gonna use that from now on, the, the sell angry cooking model. And it's either the happy model or the, the, the bad food model.

Yeah. And the difference was, cuz Rory and I, as you know, I've got a great relationship with my son Rory and we, we, we can talk about it. We've talked about it now and he remembers that I'll, I'll say it was a Chinese dish, for example, the, You know, the— normally the rice is fluffy and just how he likes it, and the vegetables have still got their beautiful color, and the meat's not tough, and it's actually got some flavor to it, versus the rice has gone to crap, the vegetables have probably burnt because I've been—

Or soggy. Yep,

or soggy, and the meat's as tough— the meat was as tough as leather. Same dish, happy mom versus angry mom. Um, and all of what comes out, and of course they're then absorbing that into their, into their worlds as well. I'm really glad that we were, um, able to have a conversation around it and they were brave enough to, uh, sort of just point out the whole angry cooking thing. Um, and as you said, that's, um, that's understanding self and your own self-improvement, which then, uh, ripples across into your business life, your family life, and, and/or your work life as well.

There's something there as well. Have the courage to actually Call out. Now, it's not in an angry way, but if you see someone that could be caught up in that angry cooking model, have the courage to speak to them in a loving, caring, nurturing way. But just say, look, I've noticed this is happening. And then you pop in, is there anything I can do to help you? Is there anything I can do to help you? So you're just not letting them sit there with that immediate response back. So if you apply that across to the business world, one of the things you keep coming back to me about having a personal life plan. As part of your personal life plan, what I always like doing as well, Sal, when I do these interviews is to give people a couple of things to take away.

Please.

And for example, if you're going to look at creating your own personal life plan in the area of my employment or my business, you know, just do a checklist of what is your business or employment history. What have you been doing?

Hmm.

You know, uh, what's not working in your work life? Write them down and start to get them out. Then you ask the question, well, that hasn't worked, but gee whiz, what have I been successful at? And you fine-tune and write down what you've been successful at in the workplace or in business? And then what are you grateful for? What are you really grateful for that you've manifested either as an employee or in your own business?

Hmm.

And then what do you really love about your business and your occupation? And if you really find those things that you love and can become even more passionate about, you can then say, do I have the skill sets to go to the next level? If I don't, who can I reach out to or what courses can I do that can elevate me to the next level. And that's where these courses can come in. I know with what you do is, is really, it just changes the dynamics of business. And some of your alliance partners that you've got, I've having spoken to them, they change the dynamics of business. So you go to the next level of, you know, what can you, what do you really love?

Yeah.

What do you do to improve that? And then what type of work or business inspires you. So if you've got the qualifications or you're elevating yourself, what inspires you? And if that means taking 2 or 3 months off, if that's possible, to recalibrate, what's going to happen is you're going to be happy when you get up in the morning. And you know, the Japanese have got a wonderful philosophy called ikigai, and ikigai is about having something to jump out of bed in the morning for and be enthused. So if you then have created a new paradigm of who you are with the work that you're doing or the business you're creating, you cannot but get out of bed in the morning inspired. So as you're creating that energy of inspiration, that permeates out to everyone. And then in that area, and people talk about— I know it's hackneyed— the area of, um, you know, drawing people to you.

Mm-hmm.

That's what's going to happen because you're either going to be drawn to— you're going to be drawn to the unhappy cook or you're going to be drawn to the happy cook.

Yeah.

So as you start to work in environments where you love what you're doing and you're passionate, what's going to happen is you will start to sip from the chalice of success. You will start to see differences in yourself and people will be coming to you and you know you're on the right path and come someone says, You've changed. What's different about you? Yeah. Simply because you've changed who you are within and you find things that you love about yourself, that you're passionate about, and that drives your whole life. Now, there are some days that— I've got this saying, every day is a day in paradise, some are better than others. So you will have low-energy paradise days, but the more you stay in the higher energy of doing what you love and you have a plan that you develop and stick to it, then revise it, then stick to it, I promise life becomes just one joyful big bouquet of flowers. And that's very poetic.

Yeah, yeah, very much. I love it. That's— it's all about those. And I always come back to the incremental steps forward. And I remember, I just wanted to share too, as it relates to you talking about You know, the history of what you, what you're doing and what, uh, what, uh, inspires and what, what's working and what's not working. For me, when I was the, uh, very much the angry cook, um, was I, I couldn't think about what it was that I wanted or liked, but I could certainly, and how, how often is this relevant for all of us? We can write a list down of things that's really giving us the, you know, irritants. Yes. So we can write down what we dislike. But so for me, I actually had to start there. Um, and that was very easy to do. And I couldn't do the likes very easily, but, uh, but by writing the dislikes down and getting it out of my head, I could actually see what was causing me the frustration. Mm-hmm. And then sitting down with somebody with fresh eyes that didn't say, what's wrong with you? Um, but actually had, you know, asked different questions and we were actually able to Um, transform the dislikes into, so what do you actually want it to look like? Uh, so sometimes we can't make that transformation for ourselves, which is why it's so important to speak to somebody, um, and actually have somebody help you work through, well, if you dislike it in this way, what are the ways that you would like it? So you've, you've got that new perspective so you can then make those incremental steps to be able to move towards the new changes.

Yeah. And look, they're one of the things that I, that whole template is in my book, which I, you know, you and I have talked about at different times, you know, how to live life with purpose.

Yeah.

But so that idea of writing down, everyone will tell you what's not working, as you've said, but by writing down that whole list of what's not working, and until you find someone that can act as your mentor or your coach, All you've got to do is, if it's not working, turn it around 180 degrees and then write up the opposite to what you've written down that's not working.

Yeah.

It can be that damn simple. But then what will happen is the old mindset software program will kick in. It will suck you back into the vortex of the past, of your genetic inheritance, of your environmental background that's influenced you, and you will go back to repeating the old. And that's where having someone who is your mentor, your coach, your confidant that trusts you, but you trust them and you challenge them. And by challenging them, you are able to get them back on course again. And I'll give you an example. This, this particular lady I was talking about that became a world champion— extraordinary— part of her success when she went to Europe was that she was able to get one of the greatest female coaches in her particular sport to coach her. And then she was able to learn new— she had all of the skills, she'd been successful, but she was able to then finesse her skill set, finesse her mindset. And on those, right, you know, on the, you know, when she was doing her particular area of sport, that she had that finesse. to be able to get that extra 1% and that extra 1%. And over the challenge of her sport, whether it be for 5 hours or 6 hours or whatever the time was she may be doing it, that 1% could add up to a 10 or 12 or 15% advantage over the competitors.

Yeah.

So if we look at ourselves as sports people, you know, people like Federer They have people that will look at the fine-tuning of their diet, the fine-tuning of their mind, the fine-tuning of their techniques, and then learning those techniques and practicing techniques that will finesse and improve their skill set. They will have— the only one thing that's going to happen, they're going to have success. And we apply that to our personal life.

Hmm.

We then can roll that into business life, and it is impossible for someone not to climb the ladder of success, whether that be as an employee or in business. But the Stephen Covey quote of, if you want to climb the ladder of success, make sure you got the ladder on the right wall.

Whoa. Yes.

And that's defining what do you desire in your life? And in defining what it is, then getting someone to help you create it, write it up, build a ritual, and by then repeating it daily, and then with repetition it becomes your new mindset software program. Success is guaranteed. And you've been part of that journey where you were really successful. Look what you've done for yourself. You've taken yourself to a whole new echelon of the way you think, the way you act, the way you speak. And what happens for you, you are just escalating now beyond even your greatest beliefs.

Yeah, very much so. So in a bit of a, bit of a recap there, you've just given me another sort of everyday story. And again, being that movie buff, it's like putting the DVD player, the DVD into the DVD player that's got scratches on it. So you're happily watching your movie and it's getting the clinks, kinks, or it's reversing back and it's, it's not playing forward, but you're watching a movie and it's just, it's just not working. The, the movie's just not playing versus just a little bit of refinement, getting a little bit of the dust particles off the DVD, putting the DVD movie back into the player, and then the movie plays out as it should be at the speed. speed that it's meant to be, uh, telling the story in the way that it's meant to be versus the, um, it's stuck, it's stuck, it's stuck, it's stuck as it happens. So as a bit of a, uh, a wide, um, just a bit of a recap as we just sort of come to the end of the show, um, as, as Gary's expressed, he works with all sorts of different, uh, individuals and organizations to help people define what it is that they really want in their life and also help to create a map and a blueprint for that. It is a very, very simple process. If you want to start the journey for yourself, you'll be able to see in the ticker going along the bottom that Gary does have a free book that you can download and access for yourself. And that'll give you the opportunity to also connect with Gary there as well. So I'd love to say thank you once again for joining us on the show to discuss all things transformation, personal growth, and business growth, Gary. Any, any short little insight from you very quickly in the last few seconds of the show?

Most important, stop what you're doing, write down what you desire, whether it be a business or personal life, write it down, then seek someone that is going to help you move out of your old mindset software program to create a new mindset software program, which becomes your reference point of success for the rest of your life.

Yeah, beautiful. Thank you very, very much. Thank you very much for joining us again on the show. For the audience, thank you, Gary, and we will look forward to seeing you again next week for more Success Secrets Exposed. Have a great week. Thank you very much.

Thank you, Sal.

That's it for this week's episode. Thank you so much for joining I trust you got some inspirational tips to move you forward. See you next Thursday at 7 PM Eastern for more Success Secrets Exposed.