Success without Sacrifice: Advance Your Career Without Sacrificing Your Personal Life

Secrets Exposed, where we have intimate conversations with today's thought leaders, changemakers, and disruptors to bring you tools, strategy, and insights on personal growth and business challenges and business growth, revealing the humanness of both success and challenge. For those that are new to the show, I'm Sally A. Curtis. I'm a content repurposing whiz And we work with brilliant individuals to help them leverage their existing content through the power of visually dynamic social media posts. What we're best known for is turning books into 2 years' worth of social media posts. Our done-for-you service provides the opportunity to amplify your impact because you stand out, you connect deeply with your audience, and your message is heard and in reach more people with ease. And today we've got a really, really hot topic for you. We're going to be talking about success without sacrifice, how you can advance your career without sacrificing your personal life. And our guest today is Eva Medlic, who is a certified high-performance coach, an international speaker, and a number one, number one bestselling author. She works with both men and women in the areas of high performance, personal development, leadership, as well as creating inclusive environments and mastering success habits. She specializes in helping busy entrepreneurs create successful businesses whilst they're still in their day jobs, and she shows you how to generate energy to reverse burnout and overwhelm, which we all experience when we're trying to do it all. She uses her personal experiences along with her leadership, her relationship, and high-performance training to teach you how to have it all without sacrificing your health and relationships. So please help me welcome to the stage Eva.

Hello, Sally.

Good morning. Oh, good afternoon to you. I should be— Yes, yes, it is afternoon here.

I love how we can connect across continents like this. It's amazing.

Isn't it? I love having the conversations about different times with different people, how I'm in the future and you're in the past, and I speak with people that are in my future and all those sorts of things. It's a highly connected world now, which I love. So thank you for joining us. I'd love to start and share a little bit and ask you if you could share a little bit of your backstory with the audience so we can pre-frame what we're going to be talking about today.

Yes. Well, you know, I love to talk about how to have success without sacrifice, you know, creating that both and, you know, career advancement and healthy, happy life with positive relationships. And the reason why I love helping my clients this way is because I didn't always have that. I consider myself a high achiever. Which is different from performing well, being a high performer. And, you know, I spent, gosh, close to 40 years as a dental hygienist. And back in 2010, when I was preparing to celebrate my 50th birthday, I had a really good job in San Francisco as a dental hygienist, and I was newly married. And like I said, preparing to celebrate my 50th birthday when my boss called me into her office. Oh, no. to tell me that I was being downsized to part-time and my salary reduced. And, um, it, it really knocked me for a loop. But, you know, sometimes the universe gives you a reason and the opportunity to dream bigger. But most of us get so, um, comfortable being miserable that we put our dreams off, right?

Yeah.

Because we think, you know, well, now is not the right time. I can't afford it now. I can't do it now. And so, um, I used the opportunity of that experience of going for interviews at the age of 50, which was quite humiliating, to become an entrepreneur and to start my own side hustle or side business, if you will. And I built a real estate investment company. I decided that was the route for me. And as I was working as a dental hygienist, I found a supplemental job. So I was working full-time as a hygienist, I was building this successful business on the side, but I was also like most busy people doing all the cooking, all the shopping, all the laundry, right? All of it. I don't know if you did back in like the late 1970s or early '80s or something like that, there was this commercial for a perfume that depicted the ultimate successful woman. And she came out in 3 different outfits. One was like a business suit, and then she was a housewife with a frying pan, and then she had this sexy ball gown and she's singing, I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never, never, never let you forget you're a man 'cause I'm a woman. And that tagline, right?

Mm-hmm.

Anjali, the 8-hour perfume for the 24-hour woman. So I thought I was that woman, right? I can do it all. But what happened was my health was affected, my well-being. You know, I had migraines, neck, shoulder pain, my well-being. I was always busy and complaining about being busy and cranky. And then my relationship with my husband was affected because I was trying to do it all, to have it all. Mm-hmm. And, um, but like most busy people, right, I thought we had time, you know, with, with the relationship, right? Well, as soon as the business gets to a certain level, as soon as we make a certain amount of money, as soon as we own a certain number of properties, then we'll have time to spend together and work on our relationship. And, um, you know, I'm sure a lot of people have as soon as disease, right? Right?

Guilty at times more than others. Yeah.

Well, as soon as came for me when I realized that my relationship was in danger of divorce due to betrayal, and I realized I could lose everything, everything I was working so hard for. Because, you know, how many times have we said we're working this hard for our spouse, for our children, for our families, And yet we're spending very little time with the people we claim we're working so hard for. And so that was the wake-up call for me because I realized I had to own the responsibility for the breakdown in my marriage. It took two of us. And it was in that moment that I realized that I was prioritizing my job and success in business and putting my health and my relationships on the back burner. And I didn't want to lose everything I was working so hard for. And that's when we had to get help, hire coaches and therapists to help us learn how to be better versions of ourselves. And I had to learn how to move from underperforming in my life as a high achiever to high performance living. And that was the distinction for me. And I realized that I could not be the only one. And so I started dedicating my coaching. I became certified as a high performance coach as well and dedicated my coaching to helping people how to still have it all, but not do it all and jeopardize the very relationships and the family and the lifestyle and their health. Because most of us wait for a life-changing event before we change our lives.

So very, very, yeah, so true. It's that, um, what's that version they say? You can either have the feather, the brick, or the Mack truck. And we usually get run over by the Mack truck before we make changes.

Yes.

Yeah.

And so it's usually health or relationships or finances. For me, it started with finances and then it was, you know, migrated to the relationship. And I'm like, you know, we're working this hard. to build a lifestyle for ourselves, and there's no guarantee we're going to have that life with each other. And I just immediately thought, like, wow, what's the point if I'm not enjoying it?

Yeah, I think you just touched on something there too that I'd just love your further thoughts on, is we often think it's a life-changing something or other, um, but you've just talked about how it started with finances and then it became relationships, and then it was, it was health. So there is very much that, that sort of snowball effect. But for me, that was just an aha moment, even just for me, because I realized that that was a similar journey that I had been on as well. But we all still, when we retrospectively think back, we think it was only one. But it's a starting point and giving us the opportunity to catch it early. Is that something that you see fairly frequently as well?

Most of the people that come to me to be high performers think they're coming to be better at business or entrepreneurship or their executive presence or get that raise or promotion. And then when we start peeling back the layers, how you do one thing is how you do everything. You realize that even though they've achieved a certain amount of success in business, You know, the home life is not as rosy as it appears on Facebook or Instagram.

Yeah.

You know, they— Inc., I think it was the— what is it— the Inc. magazine did a story once about how the happiest posts on social media are usually the most depressed people or people who, you know, end up doing self-harm or dying by suicide and things like that. And, you know, I told my husband and we committed to this, like, I don't want a fake book life. I want a real life. You know, it's really important to me that the life we have at home is closer than whatever other people see outside and not the other way around. Yeah. And I can't tell you how many people I've talked to that are bickering with their spouses all the time, or spouses are complaining that they work too much, that they don't spend enough time with the family and The rationale is, but I'm doing it all for you. Well, there's no guarantee you're going to have them by the time you reach, you know, and the bar keeps getting set higher for some people. When we make this amount of money, well, now we need this amount of money. Well, now we're having another kid, so we need this amount of money. And it's the relationships behind the scenes that are in breakdown for most people. Yeah.

And isn't that usually the greatest source where we get our greatest joy and our inspiration from to do different, to do different things and be better people. And it is that, it's that dichotomy of the, you know, wanting more to support them, but, you know, yeah.

And they're getting what's left over of us, right? All of our energy is spent, you know, at work, in the job, building a business, whatever it is you're doing. And I always liken it to french fries, right? You get french fries and they're hot and crispy and lovely, and then At the bottom, there's always those little burnt pieces. That's what your family's getting. They deserve, you know, the fresh batch of french fries.

Yeah, yeah.

Not the crumbs at the bottom.

Not the crumbs at the bottom. Absolutely. So I'd love to, um, just— we spoke— when we spoke, um, before you came onto the show, we were talking about, um, that you just recently, uh, spoken at an event and it was standing room only. And I know we're sort of jumping the gun a little bit as far as— because I want to come back to some of the topics, but the topic that you were speaking on then was burnout. So clearly, there's lots of people in need, different levels of need that are experiencing something that's making them really uncomfortable, especially if you're, if you're speaking to events and having standing room only. So can you share a little bit of the insights of what you got from that? that experience when you were speaking to a standing room only around burnout?

It was interesting because I was speaking at the Employee Research Group conference in New York City. I live in California, by the way, so I flew out for this event. The name of my talk, I think they picked the title, it was Burnout CPR because I have this CPR formula to jumpstart high performance. It was strategies for restoring well-being. Now, as a lot of these conferences, there are different breakout rooms that you could go to depending upon the topic. And I was surprised. I had 2 rooms and it was standing room only. And when I asked people in the beginning, like, why did you pick this particular one? There were a lot of people who were already burnt out. There were a lot of people who could see they were on the path to burning out and they wanted to know how to avoid that. And there were a lot of people who were afraid of burning out. There was one woman who shared that she had had a health scare, a life-changing event where she had to change. But now that she healed, she found herself going back into the same pattern that caused the health scare to begin with. Yeah. So it was eye-opening to me how many people are experiencing imbalance, if you will, in taking care of their career aspirations And having a well-rounded, healthy, fully charged life outside of that. And it was a real issue for both because a lot of people identify themselves by what they do. Very few people identify themselves by who they are. And some people don't even know who they are outside of work.

Very, very true. So with that, and I find that really interesting, that there was— that people were on that path to burnout. And I think we all have become a little bit better at recognizing that, certainly probably in other people first, and then we realize that we're shining the mirror up to ourselves at the same time. But also that fear of falling back into the old, into the old patterns, which is so easy to do if you haven't created, you know, your forward plan for success habits. So what were some of the tips and advice you would, would have given to the women in the room that helped them, um, sort of identify either the symptoms and where they're at and what they can do to create those or start to create change?

Well, actually it was a mixed group, so there were men and women. And so men experience burnout as well. And, um, but one of the things, it's, it's a myth, you know, we're, we are living in a society where many coaches and gurus are actually making a living telling us to do more, and we're taking on more and more in our life and business because we're constantly being told that more is better. And, um, but success is actually about letting go of things.

Yes, love that.

And giving things up. I, I use this example. For example, you don't get healthy You have to give up what's keeping you from getting healthy or making you unhealthy, you know, unless you have a life-threatening illness or something like that, or an autoimmune disease. You know, you don't get happy. You have to give up what's making you unhappy. And most people are thinking, okay, what more do I need to do? Because if you look at— if you were to open your calendars right now, to anybody who's watching this live, you know, my guess is that it's filled with more, right? More classes, more courses, more webinars, more trainings that you think you need to be more successful in your life and business, but actually leaving you exhausted and overwhelmed and frustrated. And it's probably the reason why you don't have much time left over for anything else and to take care of yourself. So one of the things that— it's an exercise that I have people do in my workshops. is to take out 3 blank sheets of paper, and on the first sheet of paper, write down how your life is now, right? Kind of the State of the Union, how it is in your personal life, your work life, your health, your relationships, your mental energy, your physical energy, all of that. And then take out the next blank sheet of paper And write down how you want it to be. Like, what is the dream life? You know, how do you want your relationships to be? How do you want your energy to be, your health to be, your sleep to be? All of those things. You know, what is that raise or promotion that you want at the job? Or do you want to start a business? You know, kind of what's your perfect average day?

Yeah.

And then on the third sheet of paper, this third blank sheet of paper, What do you have to give up to get from sheet number 1 to sheet number 2? You know, you want to spend more time with your family and have close relationships. Well, maybe you should give up bringing your phone to the dinner table. Maybe you should, you know, shut down your laptop and your computer at a certain time so you can have dinner with your family. You want to get more rest and sleep. Well, maybe you have to give up checking emails late at night and getting your nervous system all hyped up because all of the things you're going to have to do tomorrow when you wake up or what you think you have now or why the da da da da da. You know, so look at what you have to give up to get from where you are to where you want to be.

Yeah, that's such having this. I've never actually heard the third sheet version, but that's actually the absolute. That's the absolute key to it all is actually recognizing what you're needing to give up. Now, as, as simple as they sound, and they are as simple, it is, you know, it is as much as turning off that phone. It's just taking that initial step and turning off that phone or shutting down, shutting down the lid on the laptop. And when you are in that, I'm going to call it that, I call it rushing women, that rushing women state where you're You're all hyped up and you did the beautiful demonstration of what it's like when you check your emails late at night, you're worrying about all the things that you've got to do.

Oh, girl, that struggle is real, right? And we have such FOMO. We're like, what are we going to miss out if we don't check our emails late at night? And the other thing is looking at it first thing in the morning too. That creates that anxiety, if you will, and overwhelm. And so there's strategies for that too, how to set up your morning to win. I mean, I see you have the energy generating habits Part of, part of that is really having a routine that sets you up to win the day, you know, first thing in the morning and not turning on the phone, looking at the emails that, you know, Eva told me not to check late at night. So I'm going to check it the minute my eyes open up. No, you're not going to do that either. The world is not going to blow up and implode if you don't check your email first thing.

And I think you've just highlighted again something else there, which has become very relevant when you're, when you're generating and creating these habits. And, you know, Eva said don't check it in, in the evening. So I'm going to check it first thing in the morning. We do have that innate— I'm going to call it the rebel, the rebel, which says if I can't do it that way, I'm just going to squeeze it in that way.

Right away.

Yeah, it's actually overcoming that and actually creating and that, you know, as you said, that ability to To just, um, to let go of it and just start to create the habits. Because obviously habits need to be created and there's timeframes to create those habits. Um, but it comes back to honoring yourself and sort of working to what you're really working towards, which is the newer, better version of you and your life, et cetera. So yeah.

You know, most of us have developed our habits, you know, based on our early life experiences and, and those learned habits are what's sabotaging us from creating the success successful lives we want. You may have a successful business, but listen, most successful people are miserable in their lives because success is lonely. And you're often working alone and in isolation from your life and from your families. And learning what habits are going to give you that both/and, and it's not an either/or. And how to have it all without doing it all. And sometimes that means giving up control. And so I'm going to look in the camera. I don't know who's looking back at me, but I'm talking to you sometimes as a recovering control freak.

So

I'm literally looking at myself. We've got to give up control because controlling everything is exhausting. Yeah. I'll share something I had to do. When my husband and I were in that horrible breakdown in our relationship and we were fighting for a relationship that we both desired and deserved, and we were fighting to become better people for each other. One of the things, like I shared, I was doing all the cooking, the shopping, the laundry, all of it. And no matter how many pictures I took of what to get at the grocery store for my husband, somehow it never quite worked out. And it would give me agita. So I'd have to like let go of that control. The other thing I let go of was cooking dinner every night. And it wasn't that we eat out now, but what I bought him for Valentine's Day that year, and we're talking like 5 years ago or so, I bought him one of those subscriptions that come with all of the food, all of the ingredients, pictures, and instructions for him to take over dinner 2 nights a week. So I gave up that control. of the kitchen. And it was hard, Sally. It was hard because I love to cook. I love to make sure my family is getting healthy meals. I like to control the ingredients because nobody's going to do it as well as I do, right? Wrong. And I just had to— when I tell you the amount of energy that I was able to generate just by giving up trying to control everything and control the outcome of everything was a Incredibly difficult but freeing.

I can imagine. Yes. I'm gonna— I want to dig into clarity and priorities and responsibilities as part of the conversation we're going to continue having. But there was one that's really jumped out for me. And that was, how do we go about best communicating our boundaries? Because obviously part of us And particularly from a couple perspective, as you've expressed, but in general, part of, in my own experience, part of when I've got overwhelmed or feel like I'm doing too much and I am taking on too much is because I've let my boundaries go. Yeah. Because I haven't communicated them well. And I think that's, that, that, yes, we get told to set boundaries, but I don't think there's a great conversation around, you know, how do we go about communicating Communicating the boundaries so we honor ourselves and the individual we're setting them with.

Yeah, you know, because we— everybody should know what our boundaries are. Set them and they're in our heads. Like, can't you tell?

Mind read, please. Mind read.

I'm going to give you a really good example. You know, when I was first coaching, you know, I coach people in real estate investing because we had created incredible success in that area. And the company asked me to come on as a coach and a mentor. So in my office here were all of our real estate files. And, but I was also doing coaching. And when I do coaching, I close the door because it's a private conversation. Or when I'm doing, you know, a livestream, I close the door. So a closed door to me, anybody should know, you don't come in.

Right?

You know, come into a closed door. So at that time, I had given up control of the real estate investment company that I built to my husband, but all the files were still here, and his office is downstairs. So he would come, he would see the closed door and just do— and come in.

Yeah.

And I would sit there and see, like, you know, I'd make all these faces like, can you see the door is closed? And I would get upset. And then I would say, well, he knocked. He thinks that's all he needed to do. I didn't communicate what a closed door meant. And so I had the forethought to like, all right, Eva, pull yourself together. You've got to communicate what this boundary means and be clear in your communication. So I said, hon, here's the deal. When the door is closed, it usually means I'm in a private conversation with a client. Or I'm recording or filming something. So, um, even knocking is gonna interrupt the flow. And I, and I appreciate you knocking because that's, that's a sign of respect, but here's what a door— closed door means. So why don't we create a rule that when the door is closed, you know not to knock and not to come in, but if it's just half open, you're, you're free to come and go. And he was like, oh, okay, cool. And he was fine with it. And I had wasted like all this energy, like, what is— can he not see that? You know, I was making such a big deal over it. So communicating the boundary is being clear, like, hon, I need you to cook dinner tonight because I'm meeting with a client late. Mm-hmm. So I'll be at my, you know, in my office until 6. I won't be out at 5 like normally. Can you handle things from there? Oh, yeah, great. So I don't get at 5 o'clock, when are you coming down to dinner? I created some boundary. And so it's just really just sharing and saying, look, I need to work late tonight on this because this is where balance, that work-life balance is fluctuating. I usually have a hard stop, computer goes down and I'm with my family for dinner. But there are going to be days where I'm not. I just have to communicate it. This is what's happening on Tuesday. You know, I won't be in my regular time. And you know, does he always remember? No. But sometimes I'll like remind him, you know, remember, I'm not going to be able to cook tonight because of da da da da da. So it's on you. And it's it's always cool because I know in my relationship, in a heterosexual relationship that I'm in, one of the things I learned about men is they really appreciate being told things specifically. And having clear direction and not being made to try to figure us out or guess.

Yes, appreciate that. I was just— you're reminding me of my son's now 19. But Rory, when he was little, I used to have to give him a 5-minute warning when we were changing tactic or when we were going to be doing something or anything like that. He didn't like the, you know, the spontaneity of we're going to be doing this now. It was because he'd be, I'm in the middle of something. So I'd always have to give him a 5-minute warning. And I remember when I put anything on the door, like, you know, do not, do not come in, do not come in, there would need to be having had a conversation before and an explanation of do not come in, I'm on the radio show or podcast. Because if it was just do not come in, and I hadn't explained the do not come in, he'd want to know what the Do not come in means. Yeah, what are you doing behind closed doors?

What's going on, Mom? Can I come and play? Yeah, and I mean, it's— listen, when we communicate our boundaries clearly, people, more people show up to support us and help us hold those boundaries and protect those boundaries. And it's quite remarkable. Like, even when my daughters were little, you know, I would get these massive migraines and I would say, you know, Mommy needs to lay down, she needs peace and quiet just for an hour after I've taken my meds. And, you know, bless their little hearts, I would hear, be quiet, Mommy's got a headache! In their way protecting my boundary.

Yeah.

But, you know, a loud Kittington type of way, I like to call it. Then I would think, oh my God, how sweet. And oh my God, can they shout any louder for each other to be quiet? And so you're going to find, you know, we're so afraid that when we set boundaries that people are going to think we're being selfish, or people are going to think— we're going to have this fear of rejection or abandonment, or they may not ask us again, or they might not understand, or what are— they're going to get upset, or what are they going to think about me if I'm not available to everybody 24 hours a day? And If you test it out, you're going to find it's simply not true. Like, you know what? I would really love to help you out, but I have so much on my plate right now that I know if I take another thing, it's going to wreck my health and my relationship. But I can do it next month at this time. Would that work? Or have you asked so-and-so if they're available for you? And it's just, it's not saying, people say no is a complete sentence. Yes, it is. But Nobody feels comfortable just saying, yeah, can you do that? No.

Yeah.

Oh my God, thank you for asking me, and I would love to be able to support you, however. And, you know, um, you know, I don't have the bandwidth. This is, you know, I've got some other priorities that are pressing right now, so I don't really have space. And they're like, okay, cool, please reach out to me if the opportunity comes up again.

Yeah.

It's okay.

Yeah, absolutely. And I really noticed the energy in that, even from the, from your own energy, let alone the exchange of that energy, is when you say no and it's that, you know, you've got that closed posture and it feels very uncomfortable. But when you're speaking conversationally about the boundaries and your own personal priorities, which is sort of, can be perceived as or could be perceived as selfish, but it's really actually being selfless because you're looking after yourself. first, is it actually has much more flow with it. It's actually got a much more aligned energy, and it feels more inclusive in that, in that approach there as well. So that sort of really comes into being clear about what it is that you're wanting to do to honor you first, I would imagine.

Yeah, well, that's why it's clarity, priorities, and then the responsibility for creating and setting boundaries. That's where the CPR comes in, because Your performance and your success come down to that ability to be clear, prioritize, and own the responsibility for protecting your vision, your goals, your values. And you're going to find you're going to get a lot more respect. Busy in this day and age is such a badge of honor. How many times have you asked somebody, hey, how are you? Good, but really busy. Okay, you want a cookie? Like, I'm not impressed. I'm really not impressed. Like, tell me you're enjoying life and things are going great, but this really busy just sounds heavy, and you're holding up the world on the, the Earth on its axis single-handedly, and thank God for you, otherwise we'd all collapse. Like, no. Like, come on. You know, it's much more impressive To share that, you know what, life is really good. I'm feeling good. I'm healthy. I'm energetic. You know, work is going well. The kids are doing well in school. We're planning this, you know, like, come on with this. Oh, yeah. Oh, much. That don't impress me much.

Where should people start? I know we've got Your energy, energy, energy generating success habits link going across, which is obviously what everybody's looking for, is to have more energy so they feel better. So that's possibly the starting point. From there, where do— how do people actually get off this roller coaster or the merry-go-round of being busy and then feeling overwhelmed and sort of then sort of spinning off into burnout? Where do they start to sort of change that for themselves?

Well, you've got to get clear. You know, clarity, I always say, is the first step. And that's why I do that exercise. Does the vision that you have for your life on that first— on that second sheet match the reality of your life today? Are you living in alignment to how you say you want your life, your health, your relationships Your business, how you want that to be. Are you living in alignment to that? What is that clearly for you? And then when you are like, okay, this is what I want, all right, you establish clear priorities. Because actually, when you don't have clear priorities, studies actually show that you're actually 30 times more likely to miss out on success.

Oh, wow.

Yeah. And so where you spend your time, your money, and your energy is a direct reflection of your goals and your priorities. And so I always say that, you know, when you start piling more stuff on your plate, look at what you're piling on and ask yourself, is this going to bring me closer to that vision I have for my life? Or is it going to act as a distraction or a competing interest and possibly pull me away from it? That's usually my guidepost because, you know, with women— and I can speak for women because I am a woman— we have such a feeling of not enoughness. Yeah. That we just keep adding. Well, if I take one more course or follow one more guru or, you know, and add, add, add because I'm not quite there yet. Yeah. Yeah. And, you know, like, I, I set a, um, a goal for myself with speaking, and it's a certain type of speaking engagement, you know, that opportunities that I'm looking for. And I get speaking opportunities all the time, and I used to think I have to take them all so that I can be visible. And so I wrote a blog recently on my website, evamedelek.com, And it's called Creating My Year of No. So I've read everybody's Year of Yes. You know, my favorite quote— I used to quote Richard Branson all the time— when someone offers you an amazing opportunity and you don't think you can do it, say yes anyway and figure it out later. I lived in a Year of Yes forever. I read Shonda Rhimes' Year of Yes. Everybody say yes, figure it out later. Say yes. Say yes. You don't want to miss out. This could be the opportunity. And that fear of missing out on the opportunity kept me saying yes and contributed to my overwhelm and burnout. So interesting. And so this is my year of no. And I evaluate, is this going to bring me closer to the goals and the vision that I set for my life this year, or is it going to pull me away from it? me further from it? Is it supporting my vision, goals, and values? And every year I set what those vision, goals, and values are for the year, and it makes it so much easier to say no. Yes,

because you're clear. Yeah,

I'm clear. I'm like, oh my God, I would love to, but it's, it's not a priority for me at this time.

And I'm just, just going to pause there and just say to the audience, Can you feel the compassionate, compelling energy in that statement as Eva says that? Can I ask you to say that again? Because you can actually feel the grace within it.

Yeah. I mean, thank you for the amazing opportunity. And, you know, unfortunately, I'll have to turn it down because it's just not a priority for me. I'm working on other priorities at this time. You know, however you want to say it. And it's, it's not like, no, you know, this is not good enough. You know, it's just like, no, I'm working on other priorities like this. I mean, somebody just asked me to do something for them, and it was like, I really want to, and I would love to be in service to this person because they're just a lovely person. And then I had to stop and take a breath because my natural instinct is like, well, I don't want to let them down, and I don't want to that I was going to help them. And I composed this beautiful email. I'm like, oh my gosh, I, I really would love to, but, you know, I'm in transition with my team and we're working on other priorities right now, and this just doesn't fit into what I have going on right now. And, you know, please reach out again when you have something else that I can promote for you. It might be a better time then.

Gorgeous.

And I got this gracious response, thank you so much, what can I do for you? Like, nobody is like, you rotten person, I've done this for you. Nobody says that.

That's right.

Yeah, people are really nice, unless they're not, but for the most part, people are really nice and they're, they're gonna really like— I guarantee people are gonna say, wow, I wish I could set those kind of boundaries. In my life, you know, how did, how does she do it?

Yeah, very much so. So I knew we'd come to the end very, very quickly. It's been a great conversation, but I'd love you to share, um, as we're talking about the, um, energy creating habits, you talk about, um, 6 things you can do to generate the energy. Can you just touch on those really briefly so people get a bit more of an idea of the value in that?

Yeah, I've named them all with Rs. So you need routines because a morning routine will wipe out 20% of stress and it actually brings preparedness for the day. You need to reset. And we talk about specific resets, if you will, because when you reset, everything shifts. And so it's also kind of recharging, I call it. Not recharging, transitions, if you will. Most people go from one task to the other.

Yeah.

And I'm reading a book now called Managing Transitions, and it's actually on a higher level. But when you're transitioning from your podcast to go spend time with your husband and family, do you just jump up and go out, or is there something ceremoniously that you can do to create an ending? And set yourself up for a new beginning because now you're in this new relationship. That sets up energy for you to be fully present in those relationships. And most people are still bringing the energy from like, oh, that was the worst podcast guest ever. Let me go have dinner with my husband now.

Like, no. Yeah.

So there's that. There's recharging. So when you talk about eating, I always use a NASCAR race, right? They take these pit stops. They fill up the gas tank before they're out of gas, right? But what do we do to our own bodies? We eat when we're hungry. We're out of gas. Now we're hangry. What if we ate to fuel and recover, right? What if we ate so that our body could perform the way we need them to perform throughout the day? And that was the toughest for me because I'm not hungry at certain times, but I know That if I don't refuel at this point, my day will get to the point where, okay, yeah, I don't feel so good. And my clients deserve the best of me, right? There's reactivation, there's rest, and there's recovery. So those are the 6 that we go into detail.

Yeah, beautiful. Great. Thank you for sharing that. That just gives people that context of what a great resource, certainly help them on their way. And in closing, as we start to get to the end, how can people work with you? Where does it start? And how can they contact you?

You know, it's super easy. Go to talkwitheva.com. And, you know, we'll do a high-performance session together and, and see if it's something that you feel is going to add value and benefit to your life and business. And, you know, it's super easy, talkwitheva.com. And, you know, I'm happy to chat with people and see if, you know, working together is a fit or not, you know. And so we do a little session together so you see if it fits for you.

Yeah, brilliant. And thank you very much. I've just wanted say we've been talking wholeheartedly about success without sacrifice and been sharing some tips and strategies as it relates to reversing burnout and overwhelm. And I loved your 3-page snapshot of, you know, creating a page that's about your now, creating a page on what it is that you want, and that 3rd page, the critical 3rd page, which I think is such an insightful perspective is, you know, what are the little things that you can give up? And it doesn't have to be monumental. It can be as easy as just turning off the phone, shutting down a computer lid, shutting a door, and letting go of it. And the conversation around letting go is where success actually comes from, and not piling on, on more. So it's been a beautiful conversation with you today, Eva. Thank you very, very much. Thank you. Thank you very much. And yes, everyone, if you can please reach out and connect with Eva, she's on, on and across all of the social media. And certainly if you're experiencing it like so many people are, which was a clear demonstration of her standing room only. Yeah, clear demonstration that people are in need of what you're able to assist them with, then please do reach out to Eva. And any closing final words from you today?

Yes, I'm going to share that. Listen, you're not burnt out by what you're doing. You're burnt out by how you're doing it. There's a better way. Yeah.

That again, because we like— I like repetition and consistency because I've got a boss in me. So can I ask

You are not burnt out by what you're doing, but by how you're doing it.

Thank you very, very much. It's been an absolute pleasure speaking with you this morning and your afternoon. So for everybody, success without sacrifice is possible, and you have an opportunity to connect with Eva and discover more opportunities for yourself to let go and do less, but be more. Thank you very, very much, everyone. Look forward to seeing you again next week on another episode of Success Secrets Exposed. Thank you again very much, Eva. Take care.

Bye. Thank you.