When you get promoted to manage former peers, reset expectations immediately in one-on-one conversations. Explain that your role now represents the business, not just yourself, and ask what boundaries work for them. Kindness and clarity can coexist.
When you move from being a peer to a manager, you don't have to feel like or become the villain, but you do have to avoid the risk of feeling like you have to be everyone's best friend. Going from peer to manager can feel like a little bit of a messy middle ground unless you're intentional right from the start regarding boundaries and clarity around the boundaries. If you try to ease into this change without resetting expectations explicitly and ideally early on, You're driving blind, and that's a dangerous thing to do. Here's a leadership move for you to consider doing with your colleagues individually rather than collectively. Say something along the lines of, I'm still me, but my role now means I speak on behalf of the business too, as well as myself. And that perhaps deserves some clearer boundaries. And sometimes there's some tough calls to make that I might need to communicate with you. 'But I'd also welcome what you think would be a good boundary for us to work within.' That's honest, it's strong, it's collaborative, it's a way to win together. And it separates you as a person from the position you now hold within the organization. Your team can adjust without guessing, and you can lead with calm authority, no guilt trips required. Please don't let relationships or friendships get in the way of you undertaking and executing your new role as effectively as you possibly can. Kindness and clarity can coexist if you speak up early, and everyone can win together.
Emotional Intelligence Training for Managers | The Hidden Cost of Low Self Awareness
