#500!: Increase Self-Belief 78.5% in 3 Weeks | What Jay Shetty, Esther Perel, Tony Robbins & More....Taught Me About Confidence

For 499 episodes, we have brought you real client sessions, real client stories. But today I want to do something different. Today I want to talk about someone very important. You. Hello and welcome to the Self Belief Chief podcast. You're here with David Hulman and we are here at episode four, 500. Thank you so much for everyone who tunes in, who listens to the daily episodes, all the lovely reviews, all the five star ratings that have been sent him. It's a lot of hard work to keep up with that daily pay. So all of that stuff is really, really nice, really lovely. Keeps me inspired and motivated to provide you with content if you haven't done so already, to help us keep up with that pace. If you can leave a five star review or rating wherever you listen to your podcast, Spotify, Apple, wherever it may be, it really, really helps us out. And for the 500th time, let's begin. Depending on your source, human civilization or some shape or form of human beings has existed for hundreds of thousands of years. So imagine all the stories that have been passed down during that time. Imagine all the conversations that people have had during that history from that point all the way to right now. And how incredible is it, how extraordinary is it that one day you can listen to something that reshapes that mush in our head we call a brain. And it gives us a new perspective, maybe helps us figure out where we fit in on this earth, what our place in this world is today. I may or may not succeed at doing that for you, but I'm going to give it a go. So I got to a point where it came to my attention I'd now done about 11,000 hours of work to do with self belief. And if you sort of follow Malcolm Gladwell's 10,000 hours rule, it's 10,000 hours to develop some real deep understanding of something. So 11,000 hours, 4,000 hours of that is having one to one conversations with people, many of which you've heard during this podcast. So it's really trying to think of, well, what would be something meaningful we could talk about today. And I wrote down lots of ideas, lots of different thoughts, and none of them felt right until I thought, the only person I really want to talk about today is you. I talk about everyone else in all the other episodes, all these other clients that maybe make you feel understood. But it's time to talk about you and what you can do. Maybe we can make this an extraordinary conversation for you because at the beginning of every session I have with a client, I Ask them what would make this an extraordinary conversation. And then I do my best to deliver that. And I'd like to think fairly often I do, but it just helps me improve the accuracy of what that individual wants. So what would be an extraordinary conversation? Well, I was halfway through working with a client the other day. And we measure the self belief that people have. At the beginning I'll work together and then I'll measure, measure it again about halfway through. And then at the end we got about halfway through and their self belief had improved by 78.5%, 78.5%. Now 78, 78.5% is quite a shift. And there's still more to go. We can still grow that massively. There are people where I've, you know, improved their self belief 100, 200, 300%. You know, it is possible depending on where you're starting at. Right. It's different for everyone. But 78.5% is something that's meaningful, that I think anyone can achieve. I really do mean that. And the way I calculate that is I have a model to help people measure their self belief. They basically have a score out of 60. This person had a score of 28 out of 60 and halfway through it was up to 50 out of 60, which is a 78.5% improvement. And that's a big jump in the context of where she had started. She was going through a tough time coming out of a relationship and she'd lost faith and confidence and self belief in the idea of what love was, what love is. And she was in that place where she felt like, well, it's just pointless attempting to connect with human beings to find love. But again, like I just mentioned with you, I remind her of over the hundreds of thousands of years, all the stories that have been passed down, all the conversations that have been had and how many times the exact same conversation in history had already taken place. For her to not feel like she was the only one who felt that way, that there were other people who felt similar throughout human history, some of who would achieve the results they wanted and many who didn't. And when I think about that, it's almost overwhelming. My obsession is if everybody wants to believe in themselves, why, why don't they? And the reason is because most people treat it as this fluffy thing that everyone should know how to do it. We flippantly say just believe in yourself to anyone, but we don't actually know how. What, what are the steps, what are we supposed to do? How do we make that change and self belief is only taken seriously when people lose something meaningful to them in their life and they realize I didn't have the self belief to keep hold of it, to take care of it, to grow it, whether it was in their business, their career, their health, their relationships, whatever it might have been. So I wanted to grab hold of it. I wanted to take control of self belief, I wanted to understand it and I want to be able to make a meaningful difference to the quality of people's lives, including you. And that's what we're going to do right now. I want you to know that with six questions, six very simple questions, you can know exactly how much self belief you have right now. Six questions, I would get a pen and paper if you can do otherwise, take note of this episode, come back to it, write these questions down. These six questions will determine how much self belief you currently have. So you know exactly what the next step is, you know exactly what you can do to make progress. And, and then we go through the chain of consequences. If I asked you if you had more self belief, what would the benefit of that be? You might go, do you know what? If I had more self belief, I'd feel good about myself. Okay, I ask you the next question. What would the benefit of feeling good about yourself be? Depending on who you are, you might say, do you know what? I'd probably perform better at work. Great. What would the benefit be? If you perform better at work, probably make more money, probably get much more job satisfaction, I probably get on better for the people at work. I probably get respect and validation. Fantastic. What happens if you do better at work, earn more money, get respect and validation? Wow. I feel happier. I'd probably be better when I got home and probably have better quality relationships with people because I wasn't frustrated or felt undervalued or didn't have connections with people. So I don't know, my relationships would be better with people, my love life would be better. I'd feel healthier, less stressed. Fantastic. And that all just started with having a bit more self belief. That's the difference 78.5% can make as it did for my client. That's it. A 78.5% improvement. Even a 20% improvement would make a difference. 300%. Whatever you can optimally do, 78.5% can change everything. So here are the six questions I'd like you to write down and as part of the six self belief mastercepts model that I have spoken about previously. But I want to go through these Six questions so you can measure your self belief. Right now I would like you to think of an area you would like more self belief in. Is it your relationships? Is it your career? Is it your business? Is it your performance? Is it your health? Firstly, I want you to pinpoint a specific area. The first step of the model is clarity. And the question is how clear are you of what you want out of 10? How clear are you of what you want out of 10? 10 being I know exactly what I want. 0 being I've got no clue. I'm just focusing on what I don't want to happen. That's the first question. The second step is energy and the question is how much energy do you have compared to how you would like to feel? How much energy do you have compared to how you would like to feel out of 10? We then move on to step three of the model focus. And the question is how good are you at focusing on the solutions, not the problems? How good are you at focusing on the solutions, not the problems? Out of 10? Okay, so so far you should have three scores out of 10. Step four is what we call triggers. The ability to trigger self belief when you need it most. And the question is how good are you at accessing self belief when you need it most? How good are you accessing self belief when you need it most out of ten? Two more steps. Step five, momentum. The question is how much consistent action are you taking towards what you want out of 10? How much consistent action are you taking towards what you want out of 10? And the final question, the final step is growth. And the question is how much do you feel like you're progressing towards what you want? How much do you feel like you're progressing towards what you want out of ten? Okay, so you should now have six schools out of ten. I'd like you to add all of those together and then you'll have a score out of 60. On the self belief Chief website we've got a chart of the various stages. So depending on your number you'll be at a certain level of self belief. Okay, so we as learning capable, good high expert and you'll be able to see exactly where you land model. Right, let's for argument's sake say you have a score of 28 like my client recently did. 28 out of 60 doesn't sound particularly high, but it starts to tell you. Okay, so if I'm 28 out of 60, which of those steps, which of those questions did I score particularly low in? Right, so it might be Focus, for example, then you might say, okay, how can I improve my ability to focus on solutions instead of problems? And you might immerse yourself for 30 days to try and improve your ability to focus on solutions instead of problems. There are hundreds of strategies to do that, many of which are shared throughout this podcast. It might be in a different area. It might be an area where actually you're really, really strong. Maybe your energy is very good, maybe you've got an 8 out of 10 in terms of energy. But you might say, okay, I'm doing well, let me keep going with that. How can I increase my energy levels to get to a 9 or a 10? And just by building those points across that model is then how you get that increase. So if you go from 28 out of 60 to 50 out of 60, that is a 78.5% improvement. Now, you might be scoring much lower than 28, depending on the area. That's the key. You want to use those questions based on what's the specific area you want? Self belief in the pride I have when I show a client how much they've increased their self belief. Again, if it's 78.5%, if it's 100%, 200%, 300, whatever it might be, their eyes light up. It's. It's such a wonderful feeling that I've got to have each week for, you know, years and years and years now. I've obsessed about all of this stuff for over a decade and it still feels the same when you see people's eyes light up and the pride you have and the pride that that individual has in themselves, that they've got a greater sense of certainty, that they've taken charge and control of their life, that they've taken some ownership and account and then they've got to see the results that they wanted, that they have more love in their life, or they've been able to grow their business, or they've got themselves in the best shape they've ever been in, whatever it might be. And that's what happens when you truly immerse yourself in the world of self belief and grab hold of it and measure it and take charge of it and take responsibility for it. And you could be next. Just by taking hold, taking charge, you could be next. And what would the extraordinary benefits be for you if you had more self belief? Answer that question, and then what would the benefits that be? And then what would the benefits that be soon? If you keep asking that question over and over again, you start to get excited you start to think there's a compelling future to look forward to. And then if you can just learn how to measure your self belief, you can take charge of all of this, maybe for the first time in your life. And you get to have an extraordinary experience. Because that's what we want. We want extraordinary. That's why I ask people at the beginning of a session what would make it an extraordinary conversation. Because throughout history, the things that have continually been passed down are the extraordinary stories and conversations. I want you to think about where you are and what you're doing right now. And if you can stop. Because right now, this is the defining moment. Now. Not tomorrow, not a week's time, not a month's time. I'll think about it later. Now to take some simple massive action. Now it's time. We waited too long. You've been waiting for a sign. I know you have, but most people look around waiting for a sign from the universe or a higher power or a God or whoever it might be. I'm telling you, you've already had your sign. It was the day you were born. Nothing else is coming. That was the sign. So let's start taking action. And by doing so, taking consistent massive action, you can do extraordinary things. And it's not that hard to do. You can do extraordinary things. And from that place you can then impart extraordinary wisdom onto other people that leads to having extraordinary conversations and extraordinary stories. And that's what has existed throughout human civilization. That is what I'm telling you in this episode. And that your story could be the story they talk about in the next hundred thousand years of human civilization. My name is David Holman. If you change today, today will change your life. Thank you very much again for listening to the 500 episodes we've done so far. I promise you there are plenty more to come. Enjoy the rest of your day, enjoy the rest of your life and I'll see you again tomorrow. One more thing before you go. In support of helping you take massive action in the episode description, you can book a free coaching session with me, not with anyone else, with me specifically, so that we can help you create a strategy, create a game plan for you to become the person you want to be, to access the results you want, whether it's in your career, your business, your relationships, your performance, to have this level of self belief, to take a scientific or more scientific approach to it by measuring it and seeing the incremental improvements and feeling that sense of certainty. So simply go in the episode description, you can book your free coaching session with me. My name is David Holman, and I'll see you again tomorrow.