Ep 292: Does Sleep Affect Confidence?...

So Mitch is telling me, david, I haven't had a good night's sleep in years. I really don't know how to get through this. I really don't know how to change this. I'm exhausted. I don't have the motivation to do anything. I'm really struggling. Hello and welcome to the Self Belief Chief podcast. You're here with David Hulman. If you haven't done so already, make sure to subscribe to the podcast for the latest information episodes, science research, anything in around self belief to help you propel and to grow your life. And let's begin. So talking with Mitch, he's not been able to sleep for years. As he says, have a good night's sleep. Now sleep is one of those things that becomes the elephant in the room, right? It becomes a thing that gets bigger and bigger in your mind and in and of itself. The worry and fear of not being able to sleep stops you from sleeping. Now, I get the privilege of working with some very highly qualified expert individuals in different areas of life. So I've spoken to people in and around sleep, but so I'm going to give you some of that information, some of it which you may know but are not doing and some things just to change little habits that in different phases for different situations of life can make a difference. So the first thing I want to talk about, or the first thing maybe I'll talk about is a conversation I had with Mitch. I said to Mitch, what time would you like to go to bed? He said, I'd like to go to bed at 11. I said, okay, tell me what you do in the hour before you go to bed. He says, okay, all right. So I maybe finishing up some work, I have a cup of tea, I maybe have, you know, I watch a little bit of TV or I'm on my phone or something and answering some emails and then I'll put my phone down about quarter to 11, maybe do a bit reading and then I'll try and go to sleep. I said, okay. Now one of the issues that Mitch has there is, is amongst a number of things is being is the TV and the phone. So you probably have heard this stuff, but if you haven't, if you think of the sun, when you look at the sun, basically the sun sends a signal to the brain saying we need to stay awake, right? This is daytime, this is time to be awake. And when it's dark, it sends a signal to the brain saying, oh, this is night time. This is a time for us to go to bed. So when we look at a computer, tv, phone, it emits a blue light. And that blue light does exactly what the sun does. It tells the brain to stay awake. So if Mitch is using any of those devices in the hour before he goes to bed, it's going to cause a big problem. Because here's what research finds. From the moment you turn off a tv, a phone, laptop, whatever it might be, from the moment you turn it off, it takes three hours to get into a deep sleep, which is the whole point of sleep, to keep getting to a restorative state so that your brain and your body can be repaired. Takes three hours to get into a deep sleep. So when he's turning off at quarter to 11 and he thinks he's going to bed at 11, 11:30, he's not, let's say quarter to 11, three hours. He's not in a deep sleep till quarter to two. So he's waking up at seven. So he's basically only getting five hours sleep, if that, a night, when he thinks he's getting more, but he's not. Now, phones do start to have a kind of a night filter. They don't tend to be great, though. There are lots of apps you can get, they're free, that not only block out the blue light, but actually emit a red light, a light that's actually sending you to sleep. So, for example, I have an Android phone, I use an app called Twilight, and at a certain time it starts to emit a red light. So it's actually sending me to sleep because sometimes I have to work quite late, but I don't want to be kept up all night. And so by the time I actually go to bed, I'm actually sort of falling asleep and I'm ready to be in a deep sleep straight away. So that was the first thing we did with Mitch, was actually get him, you know, to change those habits and use those filters. So actually at 11 o', clock, he's sort of falling to sleep. Now they're available on phones and on laptops. I'm not aware that you can do it with TVs, so you might just have to, you know, if you've got something you want to watch, you just switch to a phone or a laptop. Okay. Because then if you think about it, if you have those filters on, you are gonna get three hours sleep back a night of, you know, deep sleep, potentially. Let's just, for argument's sake, let's just say you get two hours deep sleep a night back, okay. Instead of three. So two hours a night, that's 14 hours a week. So that's basically two extra days worth of sleep or two extra nights worth of sleep. Imagine how much better you feel when you have that level of energy that you're actually well rested, you've had enough sleep. It didn't take long, maybe a couple weeks, for Mitch to get into that habit and actually go, oh, I'm actually getting. I actually feel better. I'm getting more deep sleep. And it was just a simple habit change. Now there are load. There are probably 10 other things I could mention about sleep, right? Not eating too late, not drinking too late, a whole host of other things that would improve the quality of sleep that I've learned from really high, highly qualified people. But sometimes I speak with people who are going through something really difficult and they feel like they've tried everything and they try things that are trying to help them sleep. And again, like I said at the beginning, it becomes the elephant in the room. Like this hypnotherapy or this meditation is supposed to help me sleep, but it's not doing that. So I suggest if you're going through a really, really, really tough time, going through grief or some really tough place and you're really struggling to sleep and it's become a thing in your mind, what you should do is on your phone, put something like a series or put something fun or funny on that makes you laugh. Maybe something that can play on, repeat as I. E. You know, it just plays the next episode, one after another. Just listen to it. Just have the phone face down and just listen to it. Just enjoy it, right? Listen to it casually and you'll be sort of laughing or smiling to yourself with, you know, you're lying down, eyes closed. It will just help you to relax and it'll stop you thinking about the sleep. The reason I like this idea and the reason why it works for people is I like the idea of smiling at the end of the day before you go to bed and just having that kind of ability to relax a little bit and actually turn it into something you'd look forward to. Looking forward to going to bed, because then I can listen to something that makes me laugh or smile, and it doesn't matter what time you fall asleep. You just fall asleep when you fall asleep. But it just helps to just relax you a little bit, get that cortisol level, that stress hormone down just so at least you can, you know, drift off. And you're not worrying about going to bed because you're worrying about thinking too much. Just have something enjoyable to listen to. I only suggest that for people who are going through a tough time, but if you are, I think it's a really simple way of just going to bed with a smile on your face. If you want more information, insights, you can visit the Self Belief Chief website for more information. My name is David Holman. If you change today, today will change your life. So enjoy the rest of your day, enjoy the rest of your life and I'll speak to you again soon.