The 13th Birthday Present That Impacted My Life | Ep 119

People seem to forget if you change today, today will change your life. For a limited time only. For those of you enjoying the podcast, I'm offering a free coaching session. That's right, a free coaching session for those of you who want to improve in their performance or their business or their relationships or any other area where confidence is a key ingredient. Then on the Self Belief Chief site on the podcast page, so self beliefs.com podcast underneath the episodes, you'll be able to book your own coaching session for free with me or wherever you're listening to the podcast. In the description, there'll also be a link to be able to book your session. I look forward to speaking to you soon. And let's get on with the podcast. On my 13th birthday I was given a present that would take more than a decade to impact my life. And by the time this podcast episode goes out, it will actually be my birthday once again. And I reflect again on this gift with even more understanding, with even more insight, more knowledge, more experience, and how much more of a difference it makes to me and my life now. So my 13th birthday I was unwrapping presents and my dad had given me a frame with an insert of a poem, very famous poem you may have heard of, called if by Rudyard Kipling. And it just had maybe sort of seven or eight lines and I've still got it now and in fact it's in my current house, it's the oldest item I have, but I've kept it with me now on my 13th birthday being given that poem. I have to admit that whilst I could understand some of the lines, it didn't necessarily completely resonate with me. It didn't make all the sense in the world. It didn't have a profound effect on me. I understood was nice, the words are really nice, but I didn't see anything beyond that. But I kept it because I could tell it meant something for my dad giving it to me. And in doing that and holding on to that, every not say perfectly, but every approximately five years I would reread it because I knew there was a reason why he had given it to me. And I'm not sure that I had seen understood it yet. So about every five years I would read it again and each time I'd get a little bit more from it. I would have had a little bit more life by that point to understand what the poem was trying to say. And I actually wanted to read it to you today if you've not heard it. It's a really, really insightful poem and one that. Reflecting on it again, As I say, the day this goes out will be my birthday. Reflecting on it again, I have more insight reading it than I'd ever had before. And in another, however many say five years or so, I'll have even more so. So I'd like to read it. The poem goes like this. If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you. If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too. If you can wait and not be tired of waiting or being lied about, don't deal in lies or being hated, don't give way to hating and yet don't look too good nor talk too wise. If you can dream and not make dreams your master, if you can think and not make thoughts your aim. If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same, if you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools or watch the things you gave your life to broken and stoop and build them up with worn out tools. If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch and toss and lose and start again at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss. If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew to serve your turn long after they are gone and so hold on when there is nothing in you except the will which says to them, hold on. If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue or walk with kings, nor lose the common touch if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, if all men count with you, but none too much. If you can fill the unforgiving minute with 60 seconds worth of distance run yours is the earth and everything that's in it and which is more, you'll be a man, my son. It's taken a long time for me to really understand that poem and maybe understand what my dad was trying to give me at 13 years old. But he gave it to me nonetheless, knowing I'm sure that at some point it would have an impact, which it has done over the last, you know, however many times I've gone through it each time with a bit more insight. I think there are many things in life where. When you receive something, when you go through an event, when you have something that impacts you, when you have something that you know turns up in your life, the impact isn't always immediate. The change it has isn't always immediate. The benefit isn't always immediate, that there are many things in life where they feel tough, they feel awful, they feel traumatic, and they may well be. But at the same time comes a moment. And if you can hold on to this faith in the future, that these moments don't have to just be worst moments of your life, but in fact actual ways for you to make a change or to challenge your way of thinking, or to receive something that allows you to progress and move your life forward. I think sometimes there's a truth. And if you can find a reason why your best day of your life could be even better. But also if the worst day of your life, finding a way that actually that could have been a best day too, because of what you learned and the progress you made and how it allowed you to see the world in a different way and maybe to help other people's lives and contribute to them and make a difference. There are many people that don't always get to see the immediate impact. If you look at the painter Vincent van Gogh, he was very much the same. He never got to see in his lifetime the impact. There are people who are trying to make an impact with climate change and global warming, who will never see, hopefully, the benefits of the work they're trying to do in reversing those changes. They won't see it in their lifetime, and yet they see it as part of a bigger picture, something that's going to help the future, something that's going to make a difference. That maybe we can't see the change right now, but there'll be glory later right now for you. You might have had a moment, maybe now, maybe in the past, that it yet has yet to have an impact, has yet to have a positive impact in your life. But it doesn't mean it won't and it doesn't mean it's not about to. Though the difficult times you may be facing right now, there is an Earth and a world that can look very different very soon for you, when you start to recognize that the difficult moments can have a real positive impact. I'm not saying you should wish and be happy that they happened. I'm not saying that at all. Just that you can recognize that they do have a positive impact. Maybe to help other people, as I said, maybe to gain an insight again, as I said, to change something. One of the things I continue to allow myself to do, even when it is tough, is to believe that whilst there might not be an impact right now, I have to keep looking. I have to keep my ears open. I have to keep my eyes open. I have to continue to be aware and consciously aware and seek that impact because I know if I continue to look for it, I will find it. If you continue to look for the impact these moments in your life have and the positive impacts that they will have if you keep looking for them, you will also find them. And with finding them, you will be able to live your life at a higher level, just as the poem on my 13th birthday now does for me. My name is David Holman. If you change today, today will change your life. So enjoy the rest of your day, Enjoy the rest of your life, and I'll speak to you on the next episode.