A Poetic Odyssey into the Mystery Ft. Timothy Brainard

So you asked what I've been up to and man, I don't even know where to begin in responding to that question. And that's always a problem for me. But this past couple of months in particular, I mean, it has just been like a, like a rip roaring event from start to finish since we last spoke. I don't know how else to explain that.

That was great.

I mean, it's been a every morning. And I know this is going to sound maybe like too much, like I'm exaggerating something, but I swear to you I'm not. Every morning has been a gift and I've been cognizant of that. Like, waking up into every day has just been this full awareness of the adventure that awaits. No awareness whatsoever of the territory that I'm going to cover. I mean, that part is always a surprise, but just this full awareness that, man, I'm in it. Like I'm inside the thing, the very thing that I've always pursued. And it's been a real pleasure. I've been hosting mirror sessions, which I don't even know if they existed as a real concept. When we last spoke, it was still kind of like this soup of ideas. And I've been hosting anywhere between two and four mirror sessions every day for a couple of months now with people all around the world. So the sort of exchanges that I've had the opportunity to enter into, I can't even. Just absolutely exquisite. And then the sort of data that I'm able to take in, especially with repeat participants of this experience where they're taking the conversations and the lessons into application and coming back with observations and updates. It has been a blast. I mean, like the breathless quality of it, even in my voice. Can't you.

Mm. Oh yeah. I can feel it and I can see it. One of my clients had a mirror session with you and was sharing with me about it. It's just so exquisite. There's so many ways that it's applies to our daily lives, into our unique embodiment. And that's what I love so much about it, is that you help people to access their unique authority and flow and creative expression and the breath too. That was huge for me. Even when you shared with me the most. Well, just natural and effective way for me to breathe. That changed so much. What? Just some. Just a simple little tweak like that can be so powerful and profound.

Love that.

Yeah. And connective too. I felt more connected to myself. I'm like, oh, there you are.

Thank you for sharing that with me, see more data. I love to be a scientist about this sort of thing, you know, because on some level it can be really easy to lose ourselves in the even the most beautiful concepts we spoke about this last time. But it's very easy for the intellect to kind of like remove us a little bit from the experience. But when we can like operate on this significantly more embodied level, as you keep saying, we're really dealing. It sounds a little too cold almost, but like a very functional connection to our experience. And there's something very grounded in that, you know, so something as simple as how I'm breathing. Who pays any attention to this? And does it matter? In a lot of cases, I would argue in every case, yes. You know, how you're holding yourself in the body, it all matters. Whether or not you can feel your feet touching the ground, it all matters. And the way in which these just beautiful stories are just waiting to be written through every single one of us in a completely unique way, in a way that cannot be scripted in advance, that can only be lived into and witnessed by virtue of the surprise as it unfolds. I mean, this is just glorious. I can't get enough of it.

And absolutely astonishing and wild that we are all meeting each other in that territory now.

It's so exciting for me to see. I mean, I spent the better part of my conscious existence, definitely all of my adult life up until the past few years, feeling very, very alone in this process.

Oh yeah. Anybody? I feel that traversing the mystical pathway that's, you know, you're called, into a space of lucid surrender. And that becomes the path, it unfolds itself from moment to moment to moment. And so there's a, you know, trust that I would say graduates into a knowing, a knowing of the evolutionary process. And yes, you live into it, you thrive into it, you unfold, you emerge, you. And it can't be scripted, it can't be pre planned, you just have to show up to it.

Yes.

Be it, be with it, be present to it, all of those things, which is really fascinating. So a practical question for you. How would you say that as beings with free will, choice, who have the power to control and direct our reality and our experience, how that fuses with living in lucid surrender, active allowing and just being present to allow the unfolding to occur?

It's a really great question. It's something that I've really been holding in mind for myself recently as well, because there's something about this concept of surrender. I love that you're saying lucid surrender. But let's. Let's just say the word surrender itself has a lot of semantic associations at this point, which I believe are quite off the mark. People hear surrender, and oftentimes what they're coming away with is kind of limpness. And of course, what we're referring to in this case is quite the opposite. This surrender is extremely active. You know, it's a moment by moment choice to release into this flow of everything that is just waiting to move through us and to receive everything that's coming towards us. So on the one hand, this surrender is not. It's not quite as passive as one might expect. So on that level alone, you already have a certain engagement. And so if we're. If we're speaking in terms of, let's say, manifestation or creation, the very first step of creating is a step back where the mind itself kind of gets its hands out of the mix, you know, and allows something greater than the mind to begin to manifest through us. This is what I've been really kind of leaning into lately.

So good. Oh, so juicy. Yeah, you get that.

I mean, you're living this, so I know I'm preaching to the choir.

Well, but this is, I feel really helpful for a lot of people who are tuning in, because there will come a point in all of our evolutionary journey where we must surrender the mind to allow that higher genius and intelligence or consciousness to come through and express through us as us.

Yes, there's something really interesting within the context of human design, which, of course, you know, I love to nerd out about that. I would love to share with you, if you don't mind, if nerd out for a moment.

Yes, please.

One of the things that makes human design so interesting is that creates its body graph or its chart using two separate calculations. So typically, if you were to have an astrological chart prepared, you're looking at one series of calculations based on the moment and the location of your birth. Right. Well, human design takes that same series of calculations, and then it runs the same series of calculations about 90 days prior to that moment, technically 88 degrees of the sun prior to your moment of birth. And so you have these two overlapping series of calculations which overlay on top of one another to create the synthesis of the body graph, which is you. And what's interesting about these separate calculations is that they each refer to a different body of consciousness that is, again, within the context of human design, believed to exist as a quantum or as a composite within each and every one of us. So that first Calculation at the moment of your birth. This is the personality calculation. This is the personality, the mind. So this is what we're conscious of, that second calculation that precedes the moment of birth by about 90 days. This is known as the design calculation or the body itself, the physical body, the vehicle, so to speak. And human design often refers to this body of consciousness as the vehicle. Because the idea is that the mind is a passenger going for a ride in the body, the vehicle. And I really like that, first of all, to understand that the mind is not the only functional body of consciousness that we move through life inside of. It's not just the mind that's engaged with its reality. The body, the physical system, the energetic system, the emotional and spiritual systems, these are all conscious, wise functioning system of consciousness that is synthesized with the mind. That's where you get the body mind. So when you, when you look at this synthesis, you really begin to see how much authority and how much attention we've given to the mind, which is only one aspect of who we are. And so this is really what the story is about. It's about establishing appropriate roles for each of these bodies of consciousness within our experience. So the body itself gets to move through the physical, material world of experience that it's designed to engage. And then the mind is allowed to relax all of its effort that goes into figuring out how to appropriately navigate that world and learn to witness instead. So exciting. Because when the mind is allowed to just take a chill pill for a moment, relax, trying to steer and take its appropriate seat as a passenger, now it really gets to enjoy the process, you know, now it can be entertained. And that's what it's all about. The mind is not here to figure things out or to calculate in the way that we suppose. And to answer your initial kind of question which led to this, I don't believe that the mind is necessarily supposed to be the leader in terms of what we're manifesting. Because the reason I say this is because I've tried it and my mind is not nearly imaginative enough to match up to what's possible.

Uh huh. That in and unto itself is profound. The soul always in my experience, is capable of manifesting extraordinary awe striking experiences that are far beyond what my mind can calculate or conjure or conceive at any level. And it's always so much more stable, stunning when it lands, because it has more meaning and significance. Yes, yeah. So let's play with that for a minute. Let's play with what is that then? What is actually doing the manifesting what is allowing us to manifest what it is that we truly desire that is truly in harmonic resonance with the light of our soul, our true self, versus what we think we want.

Yes, correct. So the first thing that I want to make very clear is that, of course, in all of these conversations, I never want to set myself up as the person with answers. I have leanings based on my experience. But I never like to propose that these are answers per se, because we're inside of something that is, in fact, a process. And our understanding of our experiences is a process in and of itself. But what I've recognized for myself is that, again, there is this knowing, there is this wisdom that so far transcends the capacity of my intellect. Okay. And so, you know, you end up feeling a little almost schizophrenic, because now you're. You're like, there's this split. But the split is beautiful on the one hand, to recognize that we are a binary consciousness, that there are. That there are these two separate roles that play and that they can contribute to a single experience, that they can cooperate. Now, this is something very fascinating. So for me, what I've been noticing is that as I relax the mental tendency to get involved, I'm able to begin to witness the way in which this other consciousness is. Other wisdom is allowed to move through me in collaboration with life itself. So there's the individual soul, which, of course, is this synthesis that I'm referring to. And then there's life itself, which is, as I'm sure you would agree, totally abundant, totally capable possibilities galore. Infinite possibilities moving constantly through us, through our world, through our experiences, just waiting for us to allow those possibilities to express, to show up. There's this beautiful story that always comes to mind anytime. I'm talking about this, which is all the time. And I believe it comes from the Native American cultures. And it's this idea that every single one of us is like a flute that spirit breathes its life through in order to create this beautiful song.

Mm. I love this. And actually, I'll clear my throat right now. I've been opening my throat chakra lately. Oh, I'm gonna put that back in. Because later. And I had a gorgeous visualization, as this was happening of a flute in my throat center. And all of these lights started to emerge through each of the holes of the flute as I was expanding that chakra. And it was just so exquisite. And, yeah, it was just beautiful. It was a beautiful visual to receive in that space. And my next question. These Are we're just exploring, you know, I mean, together. Is. Is there a way to become so intimate and masterful in our understanding of what that genius or that higher intelligence or consciousness is that we can begin to embody it, operate from that point of awareness, that field of awareness, channel it through and evolve our mind into that intelligence so that we're not combating with dualities with what we would consider our. Well, it might even be considered at the levels of the unconscious and even the conscious. What about the supermodel, the superconscious? And embodying that intelligence and allowing it to shine its light forth so that we can operate from that capacity and be unified in that field and not have any more duplicity.

Okay, so, man, is this a brilliant question and I love all of your words. I know we spent some time talking about that last time, but yeah, the words are just really exquisite and important. In this case, the first thing that comes to mind is something that I was literally just speaking about with someone earlier this morning, which is that these. These ideas of duality and non duality, consciousness and super consciousness and subconsciousness and the unconscious, all these different words, of course, we're dealing with terminologies and those in and of themselves have a certain amount of. There's constraint to that. However, what I. What I have learned through my own experience is that these things are all held inside of us. We hold, and this is the most remarkable thing. We hold duality and non duality simultaneously. It's not a question of, well, should we have the dual experience or should we, you know, transcend duality to non duality. It's not this or that.

It's yes, yes, and yeah.

And I believe that to be true even of super consciousness in the unified field. We are the unified field. We're in it, we're expressions of it. There's no escaping it, and there's no escaping duality in order to access it. This is a lot of spiritual systems. And I don't know how much I've told you about this, but I spent the first five, six, seven years of my adult life studying spirituality and religions nonstop, like, obsessively studying every kind of philosophical and spiritual and religious set of beliefs that I could get my hands on. And what I found in many cases is that there's this escapist quality. Oftentimes when it comes to spirituality and when it comes to these, you know, superconscious realms and things like that, I don't believe that they are separate from us. I don't believe that they are separate from washing the dishes. And this is my go to. Because I love washing the dishes. The reason I love washing the dishes is because I can sense eternity in the warmth of the water on my hands and the texture of the plates and all of the. And the sounds and all these things. It's such a full moment that something as mundane as that you can begin to see how there's nothing separate. When I was much younger, I used to carry a small rock in my pocket all the time. Because what I really wanted to be able to do is I wanted to get a very personal sense that there was no distinction really between that rock and the stuff of that rock and me and the stuff of my body. You know, all one thing. And it's all. When you dial down all to this. This like subatomic realm of possibility that we're dealing with on the quantum level, that everything is one thing. I really wanted a sense of that. And on some level I was able to get a hold of it. And on some level I wasn't. And I was always disappointed by the fact that I couldn't like on, you know, become the rock or feel.

I.

Must be doing something wrong. You know, one time I remember sitting in a chair in my parents living room for like two hours, staring at my hand because I was sure that I could manifest an apple, you know. And I, to this day I like to say I got really close.

Oh, geez. Well, there have been occasions and my reality where I have manifested things out of.

I believe that I just wasn't able to in that moment, pause for just a moment because I think the maintenance guys are knocking on the door.

Oh, this symbology. I love it.

All right. Sorry about that.

That's okay.

I don't know which of us manifested that, but I'd love to blame you.

Oh, man. I just thought it was the symbology was funny. The maintenance man is at the door. So, okay, so here's another question to delve. Because we are all things. And I always say that out of the realm of infinite potentials and possibilities, separation is certainly not one of them. Because we are the all that is the I. The singular I. And energy cannot be created or destroyed. It can only be alchemized, transformed, changed, evolved, expanded. All of these things. Things. And so what I feel into when I look at the different levels of or expressions of mind or of self is not that we don't include all of those things, but are all of those things destined to evolve or expand into a more optimal expression of the self. So is there a continuous transmutation that is occurring into realizing and embodying and exuding, emanating what that most optimized intelligence or expression of the self is?

That's a great question too. All I can say is that it does seem to be the case. Yeah. I mean, and I say that because something inside of me, from the minute that I can remember, you know, having awareness of myself as distinct from any other man, I have felt that, that draw. I felt the pull towards something more. And I don't believe that that was discontent. I believe that that was, you know, what people refer to in terms of destiny and fractal lines and the way that our stories are just constantly unfolding. This doesn't end. And if it doesn't end, then it's leading to something.

Mm. Uh huh. Yeah. I love it. That's. Now we're getting into my terrain.

Yay. All right. Oh, so these are all leading questions, I see.

Well, curiosities. And they just so happen to lead in this direction.

I'm kidding with you.

It's perfect. It is. And that's the exquisiteness of that intelligence. Oh, it's masterful. Capacity to navigate and guide. So what I have experienced at the more expanded octaves of consciousness is that some of the dimensions of self that we might experience as we're doing deep shadow work and integration and, you know, working with the unconscious and exploring all that luscious territory because it is exquisitely beautiful in its own way and powerful. Is that some of that. Well, that consciousness just doesn't exist in the higher octaves. It is, it's that pure light radiance that fills any place in space where there may have been a shadow operating. And so this was something that I did, my scientific nature as well as I looked at. So we use words like love and shadow quite a bit. And there's many different connotations associated with each of these words depending upon, you know, the individual being or the ideology or the mythology, all of this. So I wanted to know what is love?

And is that all?

Like, what is this? What is this that I'm experiencing? What is. How do we. What is it? I want to know what it is. And it's. So what came through for me was super symmetry and harmonic resonance with all that is in any given moment, within all. So coherence within the body mind, and within the body mind, the quantum self. And for the shadow, you know, shadow is any place in space where the light is not shining, where the light is blocked from Shining. So I started to explore different ways to allow the light to shine in the spaces and places of the shadow. So instead of what I did for almost a decade of my life, and I called it erotic embrace, as I would go in and I would find my shadow aspects, all the dimensions of me that I, you know, morally, ethically virtuously knew were in total resonance with my most high expanded expression of self. And, and I erotically embraced them and embodied them and lived them out fully. And I went through that for a while and a lot of that was out manifesting in my physical world. And I thought there has to be a more intelligent way to do this, so let's explore. And so I just began to invite warmth and harmony and unconditional love and affirmation in abundance. Rich, deeply felt affirmation. Not just words, not just mentality, but sincere, authentic, you know, to the point of moving my own self to tears. Just looking in my own eyes, like I would look into the eyes of a being or a child or a family member friend who I love and cherish and adore and speak that same love that I speak into them back into myself to really program that in. And that began. Began to. Say alchemized the shadow. It. Yeah, it alchemized the shadow into light. And it also, it just. The light became more prominent.

Yes.

And so the shadows began to just simply not exist in those spaces anymore. And so that was a different way that I began to self facilitate my own healing and alchemical process. And it brought me a lot more love, harmony, coherence with myself, in the moment, with life itself. Because I was just exploring when do I actually feel in resonance with that intelligence, that genius that we were speaking to earlier? When do I not? And, and so I just started to experiment with different ways to allow more of that into my being.

I love that. I mean, that's really beautiful. And it's what one thing that really jumps out to me about your story is, is the evolution of, of the process itself. For, you know, that you had this one experience that you entered totally and made use of and made beneficial use of until it became apparent that there was more. And so you went deeper, but in a completely different direction. I mean, holding those two in hand there, they don't seem like they would be twins and they're not there. It's a maturation. And that's really interesting to see.

Yeah, I love that word so much. I was just exploring this yesterday on a call with a. The client and a dear friend. The process of growth and the ingredients that we need for that growth and what are those ingredients? And just exploring our own process of maturation, what that looks like for us even in our leadership. What is embodied leadership? What is the soul expression of leadership? And it becomes a process of deeply caring, loving and fun, spicy parenting. You know.

I like that you use the word parenting. Actually, that was unexpected. But on some level it's true. You know, the true leadership has to be very similar to that. I've never shared this publicly, but why not? You know, we're going deep. I have often thought about being a parent and you know, at first it was always, no, I don't want to be a father. And I believe that there was fear in that decision. You know, my choice of no, I don't want children was about fearing that I would fail. There's. I didn't want to disappoint my own children. It felt miserable. You know, I just felt certitude that I would screw it up. But ultimately, of course, that fell away. And I realize now that the lack of desire for children in my life is very, very much a part of this deep seated, almost ancient inner knowing that this experience for me, as long as I'm alive this time around, it's really about parenting on a much more universal level. It's about showing up in a whole new way for everyone else. Not just for my child or my children, but for the world. As you know, that that level of intimacy and commitment and connection and guidance. Now I know that may sound. And I almost want to apologize to anyone listening. Like it's not a Christ complex here, but it's something really in my gut that I've connected to and I recognize my role to be that I don't know where that is it on some level it kind of transcends leadership. You know, this is not something you aspire to so much as shoes that you step inside of and you're like, hey, they're mine.

Oh yeah. Uh huh. I to bring a little bit of love and comfort and affirmation to you. That is my exact experience around children. Because I feel as though the purpose that I serve in each moment is that parenting experience for me. And I am also meant to do that on a more universal scale inside of this lifetime. Although as I have lived my life, I've learned to stay open what that intelligence has in store for me. But I as an individual, don't plan on having that experience. But if I do, I will be the most marvelous mother on the face of this Planet, the love is rich. And that is how I experience my reality from moment to moment. And so my interaction with my. My body, with my. My own self and my own consciousness and my own life and all the things that I steward in my life have taught me how to be that kind of impeccable parents from moment to moment. And what I experience through that is true fulfillment.

Of course, yes, because it's such a natural expression of your most authentic self. I mean, this is right down into the very root system of who you are, of course, that will fulfill you. Makes such perfect sense.

And I think that's at the core of all of us, is to. There's nothing on the planet that feels better than loving or exuding abundance in all moments. To literally be that source of light and life and love and abundance and affirmation and encouragement and elevation and all the things that we get to be via the embodiment of our true self. It's just the most satisfying. It's the reward.

And it's a reward that is not somewhere off in the distance. Yeah, that's what I find so fascinating about it. Like you said, this is something that's held already right now existent, inherent in every single one of us. You know, this is not something that we go after or even become so much as something that we allow ourselves to be. So much of the process is about getting out of our own ways. It's so funny, man. Every single time I'm working with literally anyone, the question is always a mental question of, well, what do I do? And the right answer is, well, stop asking that question. No one, no one can hear that. And it reminds me of again, tracking back about a decade when I was studying Taoism and there was this idea of doing, not doing, what are you doing? I'm doing, not doing. You know, that really is the thing, isn't it?

Well, there's a gorgeous space that I have experienced. This is why a pair active, allowing and lucid surrender together is where the doing and the not doing become a simultaneous action.

Yes.

And they blend and merge and you move through life in a different way. So there's an. Yeah, you're like you're being grown, but you're also, you know, it's mastery of the dao in a lot of ways. What I've experienced too, is the rhythm of that dao and being open to it, to allowing it to move through. Well, because it is. It's already moving through and expressing through all things. The question is, are we going to allow it to do so. And it's so far beyond the mind. I mean, it's fascinating to me because here we are having this gorgeous conversation. I'm not thinking about anything.

Yeah.

None of this is coming from my mental space.

Right.

And so it's starting to identify where that consciousness is in us and how it flows through and how it moves through and how we can become intimate companions with it. And one of the greatest practices, I mean, and this is the only way that I'm able to do the work that I do in this world is because I have mastered the art of listening.

Mm.

And that is the primary practice that I have, is to listen, to go into spaces of deep meditation, walking meditation, because I'm always listening in that way, no matter what I'm doing. To hear the deeper truths, the deeper resonance, the surprises. You know, there's reality is always speaking to us, if we're open to hearing and we can receive answers and guidance and omens and, you know, whatever we want to call it. Throughout our journey, we're always giving ourselves that feedback because it's really us having a conversation with our own self. And we're always receiving that feedback if we're open to listening to it. So it's a sharpening of, well, all of the senses, but primarily the capacity to listen and to scent is huge too. And I find that those primary senses open up all the other senses. So the breath.

Yes. You know what's so interesting? This word listening. It's become one of my favorite words. It really, really has. I don't know if we've talked about this, but within my whole system, human methodology, one of the three pillars is known as body listening. And it's all about coming into a whole new form of relationship with your own body and learning to listen to its impulses and its signaling and communication systems and then being able to interpret what it's telling you, really learning a whole new language and learning a whole new way of relating to our physical system itself. Let's talk about the ultimate companion. It's always there, you know, but this listening thing, when I was. When I was looking for the right word for this body listening, pillar listening came up to me when I was kind of shunted back to the memory of playing hide and seek as a child. And I remember hiding and the feeling when you're hiding and you know that someone's looking for you and your everything is like open to that listening. And the way in which listening is in fact an opening up process. It's fully receptive. It is, it's the perfect metaphor because it's fully receptive and yet it is not passive. It is fully engaged. It is deeply active and yet there is no movement or activity involved. It's completely receptive and you can feel it in your body. I mean, even in my memory I can feel what it's like to be a child in a closet or like hiding behind clothes at, you know, at some, you know, clothing store or something. And the whole body starts to buzz, you know. It's an acoustic event. It's acoustic. And something that's really fascinated me as I dig deeper and deeper inside of human design as science is that it speaks to the very structure, the architecture of our universe as acoustic.

Yes.

That's something I know you connect to that because that's what you're hearing or connecting to, right?

Yes, well, yeah, it's frequency and hearing the difference. I can hear the different octaves of consciousness. I hear every time I get an upgrade, I'll hear an attunement here and attunement here and it's so sonic. It's very subtle and refined and high pitched and it's just gorgeous to listen to my instrument being tuned. And with every tune there's an upgrade. There's new intelligence, there's new information that is being revealed to me and it's at the core. It's all. All music? Yes, it's all. This whole thing is music. Yes. So healing, a huge part of healing or mastery is learning how to masterfully attune our resonance or our, to attune our instrument and keep it in resonance. So mastery is just the embodiment of resonance from moment to moment and being able to maintain that. And then you get into the space and place of bliss. Living, embodied bliss.

Bliss, yes. And you feel it. You can carry this as like you, I mean there's, there's something extremely grounding about this. It goes in both directions. You know, like you're talking about, you're, you're up here, I mean you're, you're way off in space with these kind of like these high pitched frequency attunements. And yet that very event is grounding you. It's grounding yourself, it's grounding you into the world that you're now going to take all of this new information forward into and think in terms of influence and impact and what all of this means when it moves through you, when it's truly allowed to this whole thing. It's an orchestra and it is perfectly orchestrated.

Uh huh. Yes. So there is A piece too around allowing ourselves to surrender into our grander maestro. Like we can look at the larger self as the master maestro. And will we surrender into trusting that fully so that we can emanate it fully in this embodiment? And that's really where I would say that the greatest challenge for all human beings is. Is that process of continuous surrender into.

That only at first. I mean, I'm curious about your feeling on this, but I know in my process it was a deep practice. I mean, a moment by moment regulatory practice at. And it still is, but it's way easier. And the connection points are beginning to. The resonance, so to speak, is beginning to become the norm. There's. There's this concept that I like to talk about again within the context of my work in Whole System Human. This idea that the baseline of our experience elevates, you know, what is normal to us, changes as we do. And all of a sudden, something that a week ago seemed out of reach is, you know, not a big deal. There's something. There's really something to that.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like we just said, we have lived and experienced and traversed a lifetime since we last spoke. And that's the truth of it. There's been. That. Is how rapidly that baseline shifts. And what I have found is that eventually I see it all as sacred geometry, and I see it more as expanding. So it's. It's higher, lower, and out all at the same. So it's more circular than it is pointed in any specific direction. And that process of expansion starts to become fluid and it becomes a dance. It's like a pulse. Yes, universal pulse. And we continue to expand into it. But for me, at the beginning of my journey, it was. At the very beginning it was challenging because when those expansions wanted to occur, I really thought that I was in control. Hey, really thought that I was in control. And so I tried to control the situation. And so that was more of a, like, you know, and it was like more of a painful, like bursting out. And I think, you know what. And even just an entrepreneurial lingo, we talk about hitting glass ceilings or, you know, things like that. That's what. So it's quicker that we allow ourselves to surrender into it, the easier it just becomes natural, it becomes a pulse, and you don't ever have to run into another glass ceiling again.

That's absolutely right. Yes. I love that the universe is breathing like a breath, man. There's so much inside of what you just shared. I mean, I wish, like, even if Anyone listening to this could just fast forward to that part. Yeah, yeah. I'll have to go back and watch the whole thing again like I did last time, and create this, like, you know, very long index.

Yes. You're so brilliant. And one of the many reasons that I love you is that you took the time to articulate that for everybody.

It was my pleasure. But what you just described is very powerful, and it is precisely aligned with what I have experienced, too. And it is perfectly mirrored in our physical bodies as well. You know, almost everyone that I ever work with is carrying all of the tension and restraint and fear that that exists in their minds, in their bodies, in their physical systems and themselves. And so the breath is narrow and constrained. As one example, the lungs literally can't operate to capacity. You know, they're breathing up here instead of deep into the diaphragm and all of these different things. Basically, what happens is that just as we do spiritually and mentally and, you know, and energetically, as we're expanding, the physical system itself also needs to soften. And as it softens, it expands. But the thing that we do at first is we say, we get it. We're like, okay, we need to expand, we need to soften. We need to release tension. And so then there's this, like, overcompensation that very naturally occurs as the mind is like, we're going to do this and we're going to do it better than anyone and we're going to accelerate the process.

Oh, absolutely. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. And I went through different phases of that before I realized that I was just going to allow it. Just selected to allow the natural flowering to occur and just enjoy the beauty of the journey and the process. Because where are we going? Back into the now. And, you know, so one thing that came up because this is. Somebody needs this. Who's listening. Our capacity to receive. To receive anything, but also to receive wealth, love of, you know, the. I mean, the primary things that we as humans need to thrive is directly connected to our capacity to breathe deeply. So our capacity to breathe is connected to our capacity to receive all the things that we truly desire. And wealth being the definition of, you know, whatever wealth represents to your soul, to you. And then another insight that came through was, Oh, well, there is one piece around how we try to contrive our own awakening process.

Yeah.

And kind of the hilarity in that.

That'S a little bit of an inside joke. Like, this is pretty advanced stuff. You know.

I'm sure there's people here who do and are beginning to understand it at a deep core level. So funny, you know, to try to. But the ways in which we do that. I have certainly done that on many occasions. And there is another piece. Will you take me back to the very last thing that you said?

Oh, boy. I can attempt to. Okay. I'm bad at this game, though. I think this is. I think this is a function of being present. You're just not cataloging in the way that other people do.

Let me. Let me see you again in my mind's eye.

Okay.

Oh, acceleration. Okay.

Well done.

So one of the fascinating things that I find about acceleration, because I use that word a lot, I think it's important to explain. It feels important to explain. I had this insight earlier today that in a quantum. In the quantum experience, acceleration often means to slow down and come fully into the present moment. And it's, it's. That is what creates the acceleration. It's not an actual rush, rush, rush, rush, rush, rush, do, do, do, go, go, go, which many people associate it with, which is really the magic of life when you realize, I can just relax and breathe and create and channel and enjoy according to my own own natural rhythm. So some people might have a disposition to be more, you know, high octane, and that's beautiful and perfect and some. So it's more about aligning to our own natural rhythm and following that. And then that acceleration will occur exponentially. It's just mostly about being connected to our truth and following our own. What, you know, what does that speed for you? Could you imagine if everything in creation moved at the same speed? We need different. The machinery needs different speeds and mechanisms to.

So perfect. So perfect. You really took the words right out of my mouth. I mean, this is a paradox that I've just been fascinated by for a long time now. And it doesn't stop fascinating me. The paradox of less being more and slow down in order to accelerate the process. It makes no sense. And this is a part of the problem oftentimes. And tell me if this is true for you too. But especially at first when. When I'm working with someone, you know, the conversation is. It's. It's my, you know, body of experience speaking to their logic. It's really. It takes a bit of time to penetrate the defenses of the mind. Being like, oh, I got this. You know, you can get into that. And then, oh, my goodness, I've experienced this. And that's the other thing is that none of it is new. You know, these. The way in which the paradox Lives through us. We've all experienced it, but whether or not we, we noted it for the magic that it was, that's a completely different story. Yeah, it makes no logical sense whatsoever. And there's nothing in our training, societal, educational, religious, none of our, none of these systems of training are raising us to recognize our capacity to recognize that everything that we contain, that is perfectly unique to each of us is just waiting to move through us of its own accord, at its own rate, tempo, rhythm, you know, find our way to.

This ourselves and listen to ourselves and hear ourselves. One of the, which is one of the many reasons why I deeply appreciate the work that you do, is that you help people connect into themselves. It's not a program of master my belief system or master. It's. It's connect to your soul, understand yourself, know yourself, and allow life to move through you in the way that it is asking to move through you uniquely. Because that's. We're all a part of this larger tapestry and we're all needed. And you know, we've spoken to this before, but for that collective, we call it unity. It's just becoming a, you know, we each have to become our own, a singularity unto ourselves for the entire we to self actualize in that space. And so we're talking really futuristic here, but that's, I mean, that's a natural expansion, progression. That's something that's already happening. But to have phenomenal guides like yourself who are inviting people, welcoming people into that space so it can be smooth and enjoyable.

Right?

Is. Yeah, it's needed and it's really valuable and beautiful.

Thank you so much. Really. And I love that I get to use human design as a tool in that discovery of oneself. Because ultimately, when I'm sitting across from someone and I can, I'm probably like you, I can feel them. I mean, I can feel the gravity of who they are. And it could move me to tears if I allowed it to at any moment. Just the enormity of what is held inside of any person on the other side of this, you know, and the fact that I get to have this beautiful, precise instrument of technology, human design, to kind of, to kind of like lay a groundwork, show them an imprint, say this is it. This is the blueprint that you can now navigate to learn about yourself and save yourself a lot of time. And it's just really wonderful. Unfortunately, I've also found that a lot of people in the world of human design, a lot of, you know, the professionals in that world have really lost connection to that essential spark from which it originally emanated. We see this everywhere. The minute that, you know, Jesus became a dogma, you know, basically the minute that he breathed his last. Well, that's not true to say, I guess, if, you know, if you went away anyway, belief systems, basically, you have these beautiful individuals who deliver something of infinite value, and then it gets turned over into something else. Mm, That's a real shame. You know, my whole process has been about deconstructing the dogma in order to identify, excuse me, that golden thread that holds it all together.

Yes, yes. And I believe that that is the intention within most, you know, religions and philosophies.

And it's the original intention.

Yes, yes. To be a conduit for that and to convey it and to support others with accessing it and to stay with it. So then the key is to not plug into. You can call it the matrix or we can call it conditioning. Well, there's many different things that we can call the things outside of the spectrum of the golden thread. But that really is a point of mastery also is being able to stay with that golden thread throughout our journey and our experience, no matter what else is going on out here. Because when you're. You're so connected to it, it just. That stuff doesn't phase you anymore. But.

No, it really doesn't.

But it becomes contrasting.

Yeah.

You can discern it with sharp acuity.

Yep. And as you develop more and more of a sensitivity to that, you become less and less a victim of it.

Yes.

I mean, the most amazing thing for me has been to recognize that none of it goes away necessarily. It's not like, you know, the negative emotions disappear and I'm living on a cloud for every minute of every day. It's not. It's not as if the bad stuff goes away. It's that your relationship to those things changes.

Yes.

Bad anymore. And it doesn't affect you because the minute that you step into your own shoes now you're the one in control of your experience, and you're the one choosing how you relate to every variable.

That's the control that we have, is the way that we choose to perceive. And that. That is one of the. This is where suffering doesn't mean to exist. Pain no longer needs to exist. We can, when we become one with whatever experience we're having and we envelop it and see it as a beautiful experience, it becomes a blissful experience unto itself. Even if it's tears, even if it's a shaking off of excess energy in some way it becomes its own kind of rapture because we're appreciating it and we're seeing the beauty in it instead of trying to resist it, you know, so it's that all encompassing. It's. Yeah, it's. It's that all encompassing divine love, but it's the perception that really creates the space of non. Duality. Yes, the perception. And so it's not that contrast doesn't exist, it's just that the perception can. The perception of the contrast becomes non. Dual.

Yes, yes. I mean, this, again, this is really advanced stuff, but it is the core. I often like to think that there are two dimensions and you have these debates over free will. Do we have free will or not? And I often love to say yes to that as well. Because, you know, in the dimension of external effects, I have no choice. You know, these circumstances, the decisions that anyone else in my world makes their decisions. I can't make anyone in my family or anyone that I care about think or choose differently than they do. That's their story to tell. I can't necessarily alter this world outside of me and the way that it's moving, you know, it's all a movement. However, when you enter this space inside, you actually do step into a realm of magic. And from this position, infinite possibilities. Because all of those factors that initially were victimizing, you know, running into me and, and stabbing me in the gut and in the back and all this kind of stuff, no longer is it an issue. You know, in aikido, which is a martial art form, there's this idea that any, any assault that comes at you, you. You take the position of thank you.

Yes, I love them.

Me too. I've used it very effectively. Not in physical assaults, however. When my partner tickles me, like in the armpits or whatever, expect me to get all squirmy, I'll be like, oh, thank you. It's no fun for her. Inside. Once you. Once you regain that connection to your own center, bam. You recognize that your choices are infinite in this world. And all the things that previously victimized you all of the sudden become brilliant opportunities. And that's not acute, like acute psychological term. They're legitimate opportunities. Because now there's this, this flow, this agility that's built into the whole mechanism of existence itself. Brilliant Changes everything.

Yes. And yes. And you have your. You're a choice capacity and there's this exquisite. So what I have noticed in that space, because as my service expands, I attract a full spectrum of beautiful beings. And My embodiment always guides. It's guiding the experience. And so in many cases, people often come to me and do show me their highest expression of themselves. Because I've cultivated a container that's open and loving enough to allow that dimension of them to shine through. That doesn't mean that that's who they are with everybody.

Right.

But that's who they are in the container that we share. And that happens across the board in many relationships. And on the other side of that spectrum, there are like the occasional instances. So I would consider there's different ranges and spectrums of energy. I just consider it energy and consciousness not personalized to any one being. Because even within the context of a being, those energies are transient and fluid. But when more of the acute energies do come, that's when I have an opportunity to consciously see, select if I'm going to allow that. Because it is a process of what we create and also what we allow. And so I've become more proactive with consciously voting for the consciousness that I desire to have on this planet by not engaging or entertaining, but some of the more acute, you know, malevolent or penance. It would just be any place in space where there's a power dynamic that's happening. But it doesn't impact my being. It's almost like it's. The light is holographic and it just. It passes through, but I'm aware of it. And then I can just decide. I love you and I appreciate you, and I have been you some stage of my own journey. And I'm just gonna dance this way. And so there's like impenetrability. Yes, that starts to happen in that space and that and a powerful field of magic where people who are open and receptive and generally very benevolent in nature start to exude and express their highest being while in your presence. And you can transform any. You can transform anything to the power of love. I am. That is. That is like my backbone. That is the solidity of my backbone is the transformative power of love. And if we can be open vessels for that in all moments, we have the capacity to transform our reality into its highest expression in all moments via the embodiment, then that to me is the magic.

Yes. It's so brilliant. It's the acceptance. And you said the word dance. I mean, you think about that. There's something that was coming at you as an assault, and then you can turn with it. And now all of a sudden there's this. This fluidity and this dance, the quality of the interaction has been forever adjusted and to your benefit. You know the other thing that I find interesting and I'm curious to know your thoughts on this. So you have these two dimensions that I just described. The external effects which technically you don't have any control over, and the internal space which is relating to those effects which you have constant and continual control over. What I realize and have experienced for myself is that there is in fact an impact on the powerful being who has stepped into their own shoes on those external affairs effects. So once you show up as yourself and begin to move through that dimension of external effects, there is actually an effect that you have on them. There's this like radiance that, that affects the quality of things which begin to, you know, attract. There's this radiance that actually has like a deeply embodied impact on those malevolent forces even.

Oh yeah, oh yeah, you might just.

Dance out of the way, but the way that they are going to be impacted by that will be significantly deeper than you could ever have expected or attempted by any other means.

Right. Well, one of the things that I have learned with that energy because that is something that has felt very important for me to master too. Just holding everything, like having that foundational empathy present all the time. And so when those kinds of forces come in, my primary call and responsibility is to express the fullness of my truth from the highest space of love. And if I need to dance in a new direction to just be clear and loving about that while also inviting more love and grace into their experience so that it's like a clean, an authentic, you know, movement in a new direction. And then that gives them an opportunity to have some sort of an illumination through, through that communication and through that expression of light into their experience. And. But it's no longer, you know, in my realm of engagement or participation. But yeah, just following through on what I feel is my call in those moments in those situations. And I mean anybody who's in service or who's in business or, you know, you're going to come into these different situations where you have to learn how to master that kind just communication from love in all moments while being fully in integrity and truth and power and honoring that divinity and that power and other beings, it's, it's quite, it's mastery because you're. Yeah, so there's that, that element and. Oh wow. I just got an exquisite visual when I close my eyes. Wow. It was like a wave that was cresting on the inspiral, but it was a wave and it was fractaling out and coming, like, into itself. So there's that and navigating that in each moment. And when we're fully embodied in that, that light, the genius, that higher intelligence that we were talking about. And there's all different kinds of words that we can use to try to interpret it or label it, but it's an experience that we have. We become the being in our environment, in our life situations, in our relationships, at sovereign choice. The being who is embodying more of the true self always has the most free will in any given situation. And so, yes, we do have free will. We all have different degrees. We all experience different degrees of free will, different potency. And we really, truly access and open into the fullness of our free will when we are living our I am presence. Because all choices are made from the choice point of the I am will, which is what allows us to have that much power, because we've grown into the full expression of that. And I think that that's one of the most brilliant mechanisms built into creation, is that true power will always be held by those operating. And the word that wants to come through is in the most virtue in alignment with the true self. Thank goodness.

Thank goodness is right. Difference between force and power. You know, there. There are those forces out there which are in fact applying force. But there's an energetic cost. But when you're speaking to this, this I am will, this, this original position of power, this generates energy. Yeah. So the difference between those two things is it makes all of the difference. And what's really unfortunate is that so many of our strategies in life and so much of the ways in which we've been programmed and conditioned and taught to interact with our experience is about applying force in one direction or another. Which is why we have, you know, billions of people who are deeply fatigued, who are. Who are spent, you know, beautiful, exquisite beings, poems, walking poetry designed to show up as this spark of just genius living in such a great cloud of existence. And it's a real shame because that energy is designed to be spent in very specific ways. And when it's funneled off in directions which don't align with who that person is, it costs.

Yeah. There's a hardness to it, too, I find. That's one of the ways that I can interpret it is that it's a. Yeah, it's hardness. It's a force.

Yes.

And so there has to be a relaxing and a coming in and a melting into the self to get to know the self. And then the unwinding and the opening into and the expanding and learning that it's safe to trust and be that iteration of the self. And with that, though, think. For me, the motivation has always been the profound majesty and magic that is accessible through that. Because when I. And this is true, for this is the energetic of it. So I may use myself as an example, but this is true for all of us because what we're speaking to all of it is transpersonal. It's, you know, to the. It's us. It's we. And when we soften, relax, open and allow, the magic happens naturally. I find that I don't have to ask for anything. My desires come to me that. Days that I want to have more space, space is allotted. Days that I want to, you know, have a marvelous surprise. It shows up, whatever it is, from the tiny, you know, from the microscopic to the macroscopic, and it just happens of its own accord. And the simplicity and the effortlessness and the ease is the magic of it, because you don't have to dictate or contrive or preconceive or make any of it happen. It's all in alignment with the truth of your quintessence.

Yes. The word that I found for that was elegance. I really enjoy the word elegance because it contains that quality of effortlessness and ease, but also it retains the intention behind all of it. And it reminds me of dance as well.

Yes. The word that I. Well, so this is an interesting thing that maybe we can feel into. I dance between these different dimensions of my own embodiment, as we all do, is that more elegant nature. And then what I would consider eloquent, which has more potency. And. It's a difference. The elegance to me feels like an open, fluid power. To me, eloquence, quince, is power still, not force, but that is very focused, concentrated, and directed and expressive. And expressive, yes. Yes. And in different situations, I'm required to just embody different aspects of my own being. And so I love the word eloquence. That feels like. Probably more accurate for my soul.

You know, what's interesting is they feel almost like yin and yang a little bit.

Ah, yes. Yeah.

I could see elegance existing without a word, whereas eloquence requires this like, almost like yang, like, burst of insight and expression. And there's a lot of light in it. Yeah. I can see them both, and I see them together. It's really neat.

It's like the emperor and the empress.

Yeah. Great. Okay. That's. That's the whole point. Of this call is that we could, we could understand ourselves within those terms. I'll be the emperor.

Uh huh.

Well, it's both. In both of us.

It really is. And the interesting man. It's very interesting. My natural disposition is to be more in a masculine, I would say an embodied, healthy masculine energy. And that's actually the highest, like the peak vibrancy of my feminine. My feminine energy is even quite. It's more masculine and it's, it's like beyond the energy of a goddess that it really is like, like an empress or an emperor type energy, where it's, it's all inclusive, it's balancing, it's managing, it's, you know, taking care of this too. It's. Yeah, it's a little bit more dense, but in a. In a nutritive way.

That's brilliant. And, and the inverse is true. For me. It was always quite disorienting early on because it's not as if I had models for such a thing. It's so fun actually to recognize the resonance that we've obviously witnessed between us and how there is that, you know, the Tai Chi symbol of the yin and the Yang, like nested. Obviously that's what has occurred here. And there's some version of ourselves which sensed into that well ahead of this conversation.

Uh huh. Oh. So beautiful.

Yes.

Oh, I just love the visuals all the time. There's a stunning dragonfly with like really thick like gold and pearl body, like clear, demarcated, circular parts of the body and then the wings.

Love that.

Mm. So I wish that I. Well, yeah, no, I wish that I could draw. I was gonna say. Well, I probably could. The last time I drew I was in middle school. I mean, maybe if I practiced, but if I had a real knack for it and it came naturally. So me, it would be wonderful to give some of these images form, to act as activations or inspiration.

I've often felt the same. And my next youngest brother is a professional artist. He directs a whole studio of artists down in Southern California. And I often think, man, I really wish I could do, you know, the things that he just like whips up, like mind blown by. But. And I'm over here like, oh, I guess I can throw some words together and make paper airplanes. I don't know what else am I good? Not true, of course.

Yeah. Your language and your poetry and your embodiment and your movement through life as the dancer is your artistry. My artistry is just my instrument. You know, my similar dance, singing, like the things that are built into me.

So much art moving through us.

Oh, yes. I mean, that's what genius is. It's creative intelligence.

Yes.

It's creative. Yes. The one thing that. If you're listening to this and you're a technological guru, I invite you to explore the creation of this. Some type of a sophisticated technology that would hook into the electrodes of our brain and then translate vision into a simulated holographic representation on a computer screen to make art from.

Wow, that would be amazing.

That would be awesome.

Yeah. I feel like I saw, like, a show on Netflix where that was a thing or.

Oh, really?

Feels like it should be a thing.

Well, if we're thinking it, somebody, you know, so it will be birthed.

That's neat.

Mm. Well, it's been an honor and a pleasure, as always.

Yes.

To connect with you. Thank you so much for sharing space with me and just allowing your mastery and your brilliance to flow through and bless every single being who's going to tune into this and myself. And. Yeah. Thank you.

Totally a pleasure, really. I love every opportunity I get to interact with you in any way. But, man, these conversations are really something.

Oh, yeah. Yes. Oh, yeah. My honor. And I will. So, updates on Liquid Nirvana. I decided to. Yeah. I decided to hire a team to support me with bringing that vision to fruition in the way that I, you know, Highest expression. And I'm so excited and thankful and grateful that my clients are going to have an opportunity to come and see you for Human Design, because Human Design and Gene Keys felt like the most important elements for helping people tap into their highest expression, their highest magic, their highest power and authority and creativity and all. All of this, and what amazing, incredible hands they will be in. I'm so thankful for you for offering this, for being a vessel for this intelligence and helping people to meet themselves in that way. And I'm really just honored and thankful to have you to be a part of the program and to have that as an offering to extend to them.

So I'm really looking forward to that.

Yeah. Yeah.

Thank you. We'll keep in touch on that.

Yes. Yes. I'll keep you in the loop on the dates.

Yes. Thank you.

All right, well, much love. Enjoy the rest of your day, and we'll connect again soon.

Perfect. You too, Solara.

Bye, Timothy.

Bye.