Falling in Love with the Gold of your Soul & Blooming into Ecstasy Ft. Deidre Sirianni

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Hello.

I love you.

I love you, too. I was, like, thinking about it earlier. I'm like, can't wait to talk to Solera. And just like, sister time.

Yes. So tell me how you are, and is there anything juicy and delicious that you would love to explore?

Oh, my gosh. So you know what's so funny? Every time we talk. Every time, yeah, every time we talk, it's like a year has passed because so much has changed. Do you find that, like, just so things are happening so quickly in my life that it's just like, where do I start? So today, what's come up for me personally and I think would be like, a really good topic just to dive into is. It's the illumination factor. The illumination and massive clarity in areas that maybe you didn't think that there would be something. And like, oh, that's a thing. I didn't know that was a thing, but now that I know it's a thing, it's a thing. So it's like massive truth and illumination on things, people and environments and events where it's like, oh, this is the truth. And sometimes we can't really handle the truth when we don't want the truth. And so personal experience, what's coming up for me, it's like, oh, the truth around some things that I'm like, oh, I wasn't really ready for that. But, okay, give it to me.

Just bring it on. Build me into a fortress of light.

Right? That's the thing. It's like living in truth and alignment and seeing things clearly and acting on them even when it's inconvenient and it maybe feel. Might feel like a tornado. It's necessary because once you know the truth, you can't step back into a space of inauthenticity or knowing without action. If you really want to be aligned in your life and create and manifest what you desire. And so all of all these truths have been coming through today in the reality of the normal day.

Well, this is exquisite that you're bringing. You're pulling this through because I feel as though the collective has been experiencing this at a heightened level than usual. Over the past month and a half, it's been a big collective reveal and sharpening our intuitive senses and faculties and just becoming aware of where energies within ourselves or within the world around us are out of alignment and the shifts that we need to make at the level of action to change that. And, yeah, you can't unknow Once you know.

And also how words do not match truths. And the truth is. It's just. It's just very interesting how the truth is presented, but the words do not align with the truth to cover up the truth. But the truth has been presented. And so that's what I'm talking about when I talk about illumination and seeing things clearly. Even though there's this like covering up effect. It's like you can't unsee what you see. I feel like a lot of us humans and other entities.

Hybrids.

Yeah. Whatever else we got going on here is we sometimes see the truth, but then it's so uncomfortable that we try to shrink back to our old way, but we can't. It's like after a massive expansion, you can't fit through the same space. It just doesn't. It's not the fit. It's like trying to put on a pair of pants that don't fit. It just doesn't fit anymore. But maybe the struggle of wanting it to fit so badly because I'm not ready for this in between space, between the well that I've been in and the well that is over there, you know what I'm saying? Like the distance between one truth to the higher truth of the next. Massive inspired action towards alignment or whatever that looks like.

Yeah, absolutely. It's kind of like the cycles that we were talking about with alchemy last time, when something is revealed to you and you become aware of it. And then there's a space of cleansing and purification that happens both in our environment and in our inner world, our inner sanctuary. And it's beautiful to honor that, to let all of the energy clear so that we can come into fresh spaces and alignment. And you know, your soul, once you're guided to expand in a certain direction, no matter how much even if you tried to hang on to the old thing, your soul would not let you. It would become more painful to stay in the old thing than it would be to go through the phase of release and shifting into the new. Because you're ready to expand and it just is beyond uncomfortable. It's just your.

Field beyond uncomfortable. I think that's the truth.

Yeah, well, I mean, it's. You're trying to expand into your experience yourself more fully and more resonance with who you authentically are. And to be in a scenario where either you're not feeling like you can be your authentic self or someone else is not being their authentic self feels like a weighing down on your field. And your soul craves space. It craves Expression and expansion. So yeah, you'd feel it after some time. And yeah, our souls just won't allow us to do that. And that's just a natural progression of our evolution or expansion. And eventually it becomes a bit of a waltz because you realize that that's life. You know, you dance through this journey and this experience and you're going to bump into people who resonate deeply and you're going to bump into people who don't. And then it's our choice and our decision to either stay and entertain those people, places and situations that don't align or not.

Because it's actually entertainment.

It can be very much so. And that's another thing too. Depending on your perspective of it, you can lighten the energy around it. If you're looking at it, you know, just from an, I would say an expanded or an elevated perspective of we're just all source, trying to remember that we're source and embody that daily through our actions. And when I was. When you were speaking to the resonance or the quality of tone that comes through and when there's not that alignment with the words, with the action or even I find the words with the words. Oh, that's like a whole.

Yes, the words with the words. Because there was one thing said, but then there was something else that was said. It's like a sneaky, like this is. This is how I feel, but this is it. It's like, well, it's not going together. Is that what you mean? Because that's so true.

The words don't match. Sometimes the energy underneath, the energy that's being transmitted doesn't match the actual words. And that's another level of psychic development where you begin to discern those nuances and those distinctions. And the gift, the challenge and the opportunity is to be able to discern all of that while not getting tangled up in it. I call it quantum entanglement. Without becoming it or becoming like it or allowing it to push or pull on your field. So you can become aware of it and then from a zoomed out perspective, looking at or analyzing even why that may be in that being's experience, are they even aware that that's what's happening? Because most times people aren't aware of it until it's revealed to them too where they have a self illumination.

Yes, and that's also another thing. I was in conversation with someone earlier today about this in a different way, different scenario with them. It's not our responsibility to eliminate things for people either. No, because that's Actually can be repelling. That can actually put more resistance between the change that you wish to see in the person, which really isn't up to us, but the change that we want to see. Or the elimination can actually have the opposite effect if we're like, oh, you're wrong, or, you know, this doesn't match. It's not always supportive. And so it's almost. It's almost easier and more aligned to say, this has nothing to do with the other person. It has to do with me being aligned with my truth and my path and the vibration in which I want to live or whatever the situation is.

Yeah, it's interesting. A lot of different dynamic energies can come up in that space, depending on how attached we are to what's happening. But ultimately, the highest expression would be to have grace and then make a choice based on what's most true and authentic for us and something. And it depends on the stage of life that we're in and also what our soul is trying to learn in those moments. Because there's been times I've been called to just let go and walk away from situations, and there's been times where I've been called to face things head on and speak my truth with. With love and strength. But those. They organically unfolded in that way, depending upon what was needed and called for. Because some people won't be able to receive even what you have to say. They won't be able to perceive what you have to say. In which case, that's where, for me, anyways, I go, okay, you be free, and I'll be free. And we'll just dance. Yeah, we'll just dance in the direction that we're being guided to dance in. And in situations that were impacting other people, I was called to speak my truth. And actually the person asked me to speak my truth. And, you know, in those moments, that's when, you know, okay, this is where it's appropriate to do this.

Yeah.

Yeah. Because I'm being asked for feedback, so. Mm. Yeah. So do you want to share specifics? Not, you know, I mean, clearly not mentioning anybody in particular, but dynamics of the situation.

Dynamics, it's. Dynamics in this situation are difficult to articulate in a discreet way. So maybe not specifics, but it's just. It's just a theme that I've noticed recently in my life with where I'm at. There's a lot of shifts happening, which is amazing. I'm super excited. And within that, within the shifts, within the chaos, within the tornado, things are being presented from people and circumstances that I would have never thought would be presented. And it's just like, oh, this is interesting data and just revealing truths that I wasn't fully aware of. And from that being in a space of non attachment to whatever the truth is in regards to that, but just taking action to align myself rather than getting caught up in it. So there's a lot of falling away of people in my life right now and it's uncomfortable because it's people that are very close to me but knowing deeply that oh, it's over, our relationship in this capacity is over and I'm in a place of they're wrong, but in the place of this is no longer a vibrational match and this is. No, not how I operate.

Yeah, yeah, I've been experiencing that similar things. Yeah. Well, I mean anytime you optimize or you upgrade any of us, that is a natural happening. It's just it. Yeah, it's, it's. It's natural.

Yeah.

There are a couple of significant relationships that I needed to release over this past month. Relationships that were very important to me, that I honored and deeply valued. But I saw some undercurrents that were absolutely not in resonance with who I am, who we all are at a corso level. So there is a. Just not. What I was observing is that they weren't embodying the highest expression of themselves.

The highest expression. You are not in your highest self.

And it was a being who. Has a responsibility to be cultivating and embodying their highest expression. And so that was something that I, you know, certainly could not participate in because it's. My whole field of work is about helping people to embody their higher self.

Me too.

Yeah.

So not having that is definitely out of alignment. Tell me more.

And while cultivating the environment that we need to flourish in that expression ourselves and to be guides and teachers and leaders and examples of what that is. And so. Well, in that specific situation, it's somebody who I have deep reverence and love and care for, but recognize that there was still a depth of work that needed to be done for that alignment to be achieved. And it's not that. Here's the fascinating paradox about this. That's who they are. That's naturally who they are. But if they don't receive that and cultivate that as the truth of who they are, then they're going to act out of their patterning and their programming instead of acting from a space of knowing, claiming and embodying their inherent perfection, which is always love. Because when we really realize and know that about ourselves. We love ourselves deeply, we care for and honor and cherish ourselves. And because of that, the relationships that we have with others become an outward expression of that inward love and connection to divine source, which is the highest expression of each of us, although expresses in exotic and diverse ways, which is the beauty of that energy, the core of it is still. Is still love. It's still honor. And at a vibrational level, the way to explain that is harmony. So if a being is not in harmony with themselves, it's going to be challenging for them to be in harmony with others, which can cause harm and misalignments. Because all systems function optimally when, you know, all of the diverse systems within that being or that whole are functioning in harmonic resonance with one another. So just realizing those energetics and those dynamics and then asking myself, do I want to be involved in this for my own well being and the well being of that which I have created and those whom I serve, and also what kind of an example would I be setting if I did participate in something that I instinctually, inherently knew was out of alignment? So, you know, a tough call, a loving call, feeling love towards all of us and just trusting that we're both on the path that we're meant to be on. You know, everybody's learning in the time in which they have the capacity, what they have the capacity for. So you shared a post about this the other day, so let's dive into this a little bit. You said everybody's doing their. You want to believe that everybody's doing their best, but you just don't believe it.

Well.

Which is understandable, I get that. Because from a depending on which frame we choose or which vantage point, it can look like we all know these are codes that are encoded in us at a core level. So on some level we know what to do. It's just a question of are we doing it? Are we living in alignment with it? There's a plethora of reasons. A being may be living out of integrity or out of alignment with those core truths and those core values, but for what a being actually has the capacity for in any given moment, they are doing their best at their current level of awareness or their current level of capacity to meet what they know to be true.

Capacity for sure. The awareness is one thing. That if we have awareness, but not the capacity to follow through on it, even though we have the awareness that it's not not okay or whatever the situation is, then we're not going to be able to fully move that forward. And there's so many resources around us and I'm all about self responsibility because I've been through the fire in so many areas where it's like we have so many resources, it's just whether or not you're going to use them. And so that's more about my post of we're doing the best we can, a lot of us are. And we're in the fire and it's a tornado and we don't know what's up, what's down, what's left, what's right. And some of us are doing the very best we can. It looks like a tornado. And then others, we have awareness, we have all resources, all the support, but we're not taking action. And so that's what I'm speaking to.

Yeah, so there's a lot of different dynamics in that too. And I mean, I'm obviously speaking from a space of wisdom and experience too, because I've been through. Yeah, I've been through. Yeah, yeah. So. So this is where empathy comes in for me. And one recollecting my own journey and the stages of healing and growth that I had to go through to access my own fullest capacity, which is still always expanding. And looking at, you know, a lot of people try to rush into action and they're not fully healed at a biological level. So at the level of being able to embody our full power has so much to do with our inner circuitry and how optimized that is, and that determines our capacity. So if we're not even able to run free energy, clean energy, light, intelligence, then it's going to be challenging for us to actually hold that much power, that much light in our body, let alone hold it and express it. So there is an optimization that takes place at the physical level first and foremost. And you know, a being has to be devoted to giving that to themselves so that they can expand their capacity creating spaces, cleansing, purifying, aligning their life, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, energetically, environmentally, relationally, all of those things. And if just one area is out of alignment, it's still going to impact all of the other areas. So it's a 360 degree optimization that takes place. And that's the true devotion that will expand our capacity ultimately to its highest potential. Because we can't just be doing that in a few areas and be like, I don't want to do that. No, yep, eventually you'll be called to do that in whichever area, and we know what that is. For ourselves, you know, like when I. When I wake up on a daily basis, man, my days are full, and I'm so thankful because they're rich with life and beauty. And I do my best to make love to the experience. So to go into all of it from a space of joy and presence and just savory, you know, savoring the moment. But all of those areas of my life get. Receive my deep attention on a daily basis. And so I build, you know, and we talked about this on our call. I'm not in a rush to get to just the orgasm. I want the whole thing to be an orgasm. I want the entire journey to feel orgasmic. And so that's the way that I have set up my life. But, you know, a lot of people who start having these realizations and these revelations within themselves, like, oh, man, I need to do. And they rush into it in an unhealthy way that will always create the opposing force. And so that's also a part of the calibration, the optimization and the realization. And all of that is even what is our. What is the pace in which we are moving through life? And is that in resonance with our core signature, our core soul signature? Which is why all of my work is tailored to the individual meeting themselves, meeting. Discovering what that is for them so that they can live in harmony with their own essence, their own creative expression, their own emergence. That's so different for all of us. And nature is such. Such an exquisite example of this. Look at how biodiverse nature is and how many exotic creatures and animals and plants and flowers and all of this are. We are all still infinite. Creative intelligence emerging, light emerging. The way that that happens for each of us is totally unique and different, and it happens at different paces in different layers. And there's a different context and conditions that we each need to thrive. And so a huge part of mastery is to know ourselves and what those conditions are for us and to honor them. And that's automatically in service to everyone around us. Because, you know, I mean, I love. I love my life, and I appreciate my life deeply. And a lot of what I do to stay in alignment is so that I can serve optimally as well. Because if I'm not keeping myself in alignment. And there's moments that come like I needed some space when I had to release a couple of these relationships this past month, because, yeah, I mean, I was a little bit sad about having to do that. I felt a little bit guilty about doing that. You know, a lot of the motions that come up and I'm like, well, I can't create from this space. So what I'm going to do now for the next two days is I'm going to devote my full energy and presence and attention to processing this energy blessing this energy, clearing this energy coming back into myself fully before I move forward. But the sooner we can give that to ourselves, the sooner we can cycle through those phases, because that's always what's being called for. If we're not sure or if we don't feel the flow or if our action feels like it's being halted, it's because we're being called to come back in and be with ourselves fully, completely first to whatever we need to do for ourselves. And that's just tuning into our body and our intuition and trusting its guidance. And after we give that to ourselves, and if we resist that phase, then we'll just keep trying to push out here. And so much time could be, you know, doing that for so long. If we could have just taken 24 hours or 48 hours, too.

Yeah, it's so interesting because I'm in a. I'm in a cleansing space right now.

I've.

I've quit coffee and I'm going to be quitting sugar next week. I'm just. I'm in a detox. I'm in a cleansing and detox, resetting. My apartment was empty. Things are shifting and releasing a couple people from my life. And I would say two of these people are the closest people to me. So it's very. It's been very difficult, and it feels like everything's happening at once. And on that note, it's like I've just been so physically exhausted. I've been napping and I've been canceling plans. I'm like, I just need to be with myself and to nourish myself and to give myself that space. Because when I am releasing something, or in general, I think in the past, I would just feel something, maybe an outburst of, you know, sadness. But then I feel like. And then I move on. I was, like, trucking along, and that used to work for me, but it's not working for me right now. So I feel that so much. And it's just like that space and the time to let whatever needs to come through come through and also just be like, being in love with yourself. Being in love with myself. Because at the end of the day, it doesn't matter who I have around me. I love people. And it doesn't matter who you surround yourself with. But at the end of the day, I gotta feel good about me. And if I don't feel whatever it is, I'm gonna be carrying that around with me in some way, shape or form. And it's not. It's gonna rob me of joy or my next level of service or my expression or something, or I'm gonna repeat, keep the power. And I'm not going to let go, you know, And I can see those patterns, patterns within myself, like, oh, like clinging to comfort, clinging to the knowing. But it's like. But there's a letting go for a reason. And I have to honor that.

And your soul knows. And there's so much magic in those spaces too. This, I mean, those spaces are some of the core spaces that I discovered magic and the metaphysics and mechanics of reality creation. Because you'll realize how infinitely supported you are by life when you allow yourself to receive that energy in the way that you need to. Instead of rushing to meet the world's commands, you meet the commands of your soul. And in that you are infinitely supported and supplied. And you get to revel in the sacred spaces of that. And that's the manifesting intelligence of the divine feminine, the power of the divine feminine and capacity to magnetize and attract and create spaces for things to land and to invite things in and to be, to exude the expression of abundance that she is and align to those timelines. And so you first have to give yourself that, to see that, you know, see that in yourself and honor that in yourself. And that's ultimately what will guide our actions as well. You know, when you see the beauty and the magnificence and the quality of your own soul, you will only allow that inside of your reality and your experience. And you'll want to spend more and more time nurturing that and savoring it and honoring it and acting from that space. Because then you feel also a sense of joy and rich love towards all of your creations and what you're putting out into the world and what you're gifting to humanity in society. And you carry the resonance all the way through. That's where the words start to match the resonance. And instead of it being like a disconnected conceptual intelligence that we're aware of, it becomes embodied. So we're actually resonating it and we're living it through our actions. And that's what embodiment is to me. I mean, we're acting it through, but through the resonance of it.

And this feels like it's a. An alignment and a resonance and really being integral with the words that I have in my mind about who I am and what I'm creating and what I'm doing. And it's. I feel like every time something in my life happens, like a big letting go or a big shift, that's what it's all about. It's about coming back to a stronger, more grounded, more embodied version of who I am and what I'm here to do. And for me, my purpose and what I'm here to do is my number one priority. But when I think about it in these relationships, even though it still was my priority, sometimes it would be on the back burner a little bit or a compromise. Some things with, you know, something that I would really want to or feel called to move forward with, I put on hold or I wouldn't put as much attention, care into something that I'm birthing. And so it's like that awareness too. It's like it's just coming back home, right?

Yep. Yeah. To your soul, too. Thy own self be true.

Yeah.

I mean, to flourish, you've got to. I mean, it's mind, body, soul. And I find that. Well, I mean, they're. They're all such cohesive, intertwined elements. They all cohere together. But yeah, seeing anywhere you give your power over or anywhere that you are living somebody else's life or according to somebody else's beliefs. Now this is a huge one. Living according to other people's beliefs, like with all this stuff that you see in the world around how to create and what you need to do and all of these things. It's just, you got to get super clear on what your beliefs are and configure the ones that you want to live by, because that's ultimately what's going to determine your. What you out manifest in your reality, what you. What you believe to be true, what story you have constructed. And sometimes, you know, we go along with, you know, other people's flow of things for whatever reason that we get caught up in that. We either get caught up in it because we're not spending enough time understanding our own self, or we love them so much, we're just like, yes, yes, sure. And we go and we do, and we, you know, before you know it, you're living somebody else's reality or somebody else's dream and not fully your own.

Yes, I did that for a decade in my past life.

Yeah, like last week was a past life.

That was a past life too. But the past life before that was like. So that's what it is. It's just coming back to myself and yeah, belief systems. What are my, what are my core belief systems and where have I been playing that maybe isn't fully aligned with that?

Yeah. And how do you want to architect your reality? It's. Neville has a quote and he says the power of belief is a power against which no earthly form, force is of the slightest significance. To really take that in the juice of that, the richness, the fullness of that. Which means that your power of belief, your knowing, what you have faith in for yourself is what is going to determine what you experience and out manifest in your reality. So a gorgeous space to cultivate is the belief space. What do I believe, what do I know to be true? What works for me, what is aligned to me and then living authentically from that space. Yeah. Because we're all so unique and different. You know, it's not a one science baseball game.

There's no cookie cutter. What are you talking about? Here's how to live the life of your, your dreams. Find this, do this, wear this. Be confident. This is how you're confident. Put your hands on your hips. Power pose, right? There's so much stuff, it's just funny. Oh, I did a, an intensive line, confidence in true self confidence on your hips. But there's so much of that. Right. Like this, I did this course on. It was a local course on true self and confidence and I facilitated it. And everyone's like, oh, we're so excited to learn how to talk and how to be. Because people are always like, you're so confident. I'm like, well, actually I just really do know who I am and I know I'm going to look like a, you know, I'm going to come across like a crazy person sometimes or I have a lot of quirks or you might not get me. And like I'm totally fine with it. And so they were expecting one thing and they got something totally different because it was about really understanding your true self and just being that fully with whatever that is. If you are nervous and you're nervous all the time and you shake when you talk and that's just who you are.

Well, just own that right there.

Don't try to step away from it, you know, don't try to put your hands on your hips and pretend that you're like Superwoman or Superman. Like that's a little bit weird, you know what I mean? But there's like this illusion of how we have to dress and stand and talk in order to be a certain thing. And I think that's also the way that we live. Like, there's fabricated happiness, and so it's like, get the job or get the freedom, get the money, get the girlfriend, get the boyfriend, whatever it is. And there's this long list, and we. And we decide what it is that we want, and then we get there and we're like, oh, I'm not happy. How come I'm not happy? Why I did all the things right? It's like, no, it wasn't by design. It wasn't by your design. It was by somebody else's rules.

Yes. That's so good. That's so good.

So confidence. Confidence to me is really about knowing who you are, knowing it all and loving it all and it being expressed. And so it was just funny. People were like, that was not what I expected. But I feel really confident with who I am now. I'm perfect. Because if you're not confident, it's just because you haven't spent enough time with yourself, those parts of yourself. Because most of the time, at least from my experience, we've been taught to change parts of ourselves in order to be good enough or to come across a certain way, and it's just ridiculous. We don't need to do that. The deeper layer here, what I'm getting in this conversation, is your belief system. You want to manifest fully and create a life by design. What is the belief system you want to live by? I'm like, yeah, like, I need to really. Like, I know what they are. I just need to write that shit down and put it up. Like, this is how I live. Filter, filter, filter. Yeah. I used to have these rules that I wrote on my fridge about two years ago, and it was like, rules to live by. And I would filter friends through it. I would filter everything through it. And it was pretty amazing. I was, like, on a high all the time. Like, everything is amazing. But it's because I was. I was living my life based on rules that I created. And they were fun. And I'm like, oh, does this, like, challenge me? Is this exciting and scary at the same time? It's an F. Yes. Does it make me feel like I have to change who I am or whatever? Like, it's a strong no, like, and all of those things. And, yeah, this is really good belief systems. I don't think we spent enough time on this stuff in general, you know?

Yeah, yeah. And they shift and evolve, and we do, too. So it's good to revisit, you know, every Six months or so. Although there's a space in place of not having any belief systems at all and being a virgin unto the moment. And there's a space in place for really standing tall and with valor, for what you believe in and you love and you value and you cherish and holding true to that, your own reality, for ultimate fulfillment inside of every now. And I, you know, I'm all about having all the things, the love and all the space and all the beautiful experiences that we get to have in life and having literally a rich, full life. But if we're not aligned in our own physical body, able to meet the moment no matter what we're experiencing, it's not gonna have the same quality to it, you know?

Do you mean like health wise or do you mean like as far as, like. Can you tell me more about that?

Yeah, health. Health for sure. And I think for me, it looks like inner peace. Do I have inner peace? Am I doing what helps me to feel a sense of inner peace? And even when things go awry or there's a twist or a bend in the story, am I able to keep my peace even as that? Can I be the eye of the tornado and all of that. Those are profoundly powerful growth points when you learn to be the eye in the tornado. Oh, man. I remember I kept getting. I went through a huge calibration one time, and it was in a love relationship. Person I love more than any other human being I've ever loved in this entire physical lifetime. And I kept seeing the word cyclone. And I was listening to Da Da a lot then, and one of her songs, she would say, a storm is coming. And I felt it in my bones. I was like, this is all just prophecy for some stuff that's about to unfold. And I feel it and I know it. And I'm gonna pretend like that's not what's happening. Empower and reinforce it. But I know, you know, you just know when they hit you at that core level. And the journey that me and this being went on together was we were always very loving and cordial with one another. But I know that we both went through, like, experienced that inner cyclone where it just came through and it just shattered my patterns. Oh, man. Just shattered them until my heart, My heart had to shatter open. And that was one of the scenarios that facilitated that. And it was certainly not comfortable. Really deeply intense and challenging. I mean, I remember going through a whole entire roll of toilet paper one night, just climbing, crying from my gut, from the core of my being, aching for the love that I thought I could only experience through another soul. All of that, the fullness of that journey and that experience. And in the midst of that, other things started to manifest in my life that were reflecting how I was feeling. And I was like, okay, we got to find inner peace. We just have to. Because I can't. Like, my whole life can't become a cyclone because of this. So at that time, I practiced peace and trust and stillness. And at that time, you know, I was operating more from trust than inner knowingness, but I was just surrendering it all to a higher source. I'm like, yeah, my higher self. Higher source. Genius. The you, the me that is not rattled by any of this. I'm just gonna trust that you know exactly what.

You're.

Going to melt into that. So I started to practice and cultivate that frequency so I could carry that with me through other life circumstances. And that has had a profound effect on my life. And the way that I meet potentially challenging situations and enables me to still see the perfection of everything that is unfolding, even when it might appear that it's. I just. I'm like, yep, it's working out for my highest benefit. It's working out for everybody's highest benefit. And I know that. And it may not be apparent in this example moment, but I know that to be true. You know, some of those things are. We can't see unless we're totally still or we're calm, we're attached, and just. We've got our. We got our claws in it, you know, in which case we're getting spun around. We're getting spun around. Yeah. But there is so much beauty in that catharsis, too. And that's another huge element to all of this, because the reason why I would say 90 to 95% of the time in my personal reality, I maintain a feeling of bliss or joy or peace or empowerment is that I honor the. I find harmony with the cathartic moments as well. And I find. Feel the beauty in them. And I'm experiencing bliss even through those moments, even through. In those moments and those experiences by merging with them, by becoming one with them. And it's the way that I'm perceiving it that allows that feeling of euphoria or ecstasy to stay and remain intact, even though the emotion might not be considered one of ecstasy or euphoria, because there's so much beauty in all of it. Right. I was looking at my journals, which you inspired, because you are sending me all of your lush and powerful Poetry and so very powerful. And I was reading through some of my work, and there were beautiful pieces where I was just so surrendered and in the flow and completely magnetic and open and manifesting profoundly large things with minimal effort. So I was leveraging my energy, and there were other times where I was just deep in the mystical catharsis of awakening. And the words that came through were much more intensified, you know, and passion filled and had an aura of darkness around them, you know, But I found the fertility in those moments and the beauty. And so I think that whatever experience we're having can be one of beauty and of rapture in its own unique way, if that's what we select, if we don't resist it, if we merge with it and unify with it and. And know that it's part of our cycles of evolution and expansion. And there's such plush wisdom to gain through all of those experiences. So much intuitive activation, self trust, universal trust, revelation of universal powers and secrets that are only accessible through initiation.

I love that.

And it's so. Okay, I'll go through this. I'll extract the gold. I'll go in. Let's go.

And you are the gold, right? Like, whatever happens, we are the gold. We're gonna survive.

Yes.

We're stronger, we're shinier, we're more on purpose where we have more wisdom. It all comes through something that's really helped me in the past, and I think I should probably use it now, too, as I'm in the chaos. And it's funny because normally when stuff happens, I'll, like, feel it, and I'm like, I'm good. Like I said, I'm good the next day. But this is different this time, and that's okay. But if it's not this is something better, whatever it is, if it's not this, it's something better. And that one liner has helped me so much. Anytime that I have started to become attached to an outcome or I'm resisting letting go, and it's like, well, if it's not, this is something better. So then it's like that excitement of, ooh, what's next? But first I gotta feel this. I don't know for how much longer, but when it's done, it's gonna be done. And that's really exciting.

Yeah. Yes. And when you get the revelation of the new, you're like, wow, I can't even believe that I held on to that. Whether it's a person, place, thing, pattern, you know, whatever. And there's just so much more Magnificence. And I love that you said, you are the gold. This is a. It's palpable to recognize this because no matter what you. Shifts and changes around us in our outside world, if you truly know and receive yourself as the gold, as the beauty, as the Holy Grail, as the expression of pure genius, as having all of the resources encoded within you, now you're just fully sovereign and empowered and transcendent in so many ways, because you will have you the light of your soul, the light and the power of your quintessence wherever you go. And that is something that is a permanent fixture. Nothing. Nothing can ever take that from you, ever. And that, truly, I find that is a source of confidence and empowerment for me, as I find. I find confidence in that part of myself.

Yes, That's. I just took a little picture, just so, you know, looking so beautiful right now. I'm just gonna take a little photo.

Yeah.

Because no matter what happens, we're going to end up on top. Unless we resist. If we resist, we'll get stuck. And one of the worst feelings for me is being stagnant or like. Or going back on something that I know that I need to do. Like, oh, I know that I need to do that, but instead, I'm going to go here and not deal with it. That doesn't feel good. It's like this deep feeling of letting myself down and a deep feeling of sadness and heaviness and just stagnation. And it's just like. That is the only thing that's gonna, like, you know, cover up our sparkle or the gold with dirt or whatever else is us not allowing ourselves to go through. We could even say a wave, like the undertow of the ocean. When you come out on top, you're sparkly and you're like, ha. I'm.

I'm great.

That was amazing. And it's this cleansing. It's this purging. This is letting go of something that is no longer there, that does. And it's. It's interesting how our bodies respond. I find when I'm going through something big, not always, but it's very. When something is ending, I'll get sick. I'll, like. Like, I will throw up. I'll, like. All of a sudden, I'll just be, like, so sick. Maybe it's for, like an hour, maybe it's for a day. And sometimes it's my body's intelligence telling me before it's even happened. Like, girl, you are clearing this. So I just think of it and so As I minute, I'm just like, yeah, it's just, it's just a rinse, it's just a rinsing and it's a tossing and so that as long as we're not resisting, we are winning.

Yeah. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. The very first line in Eckhart Tolle's book, the Power of Now, is resist nothing. If you get anything from this book, resist nothing, that's it. You can principle, you'll be in good shape. And yeah, I mean, anytime there's that profound of a calibration and the synthesis happening in the physical body, you are optimizing. You're optimizing. It's your sacred geometrical patterning is expanding. And it's so important to honor yourself and nourish yourself during those spaces. So, so, so important. Because literally the blueprint or the signature of your tone, your resonance is expanding to a higher octave, which makes it more dynamic and complex. So you contain all the tones and the information and the intelligence for all the preceding octaves of vibration and consciousness. And now you're literally synthesizing and uploading massive amount of new data. And your body has to be able to receive that. That's what we're talking about, capacity.

This is it.

Yes, this is it. So when you're going through a calibration, so some people don't actually have the capacity because they haven't either cleansed their neurocircuitry, given themselves or their biological circuitry and given themselves the space to truly, deeply self nourish and self honor and give themselves what they need so that that capacity can expand, so that the old can cleanse out and clear out and the new coding can take root and land fully. And there's so much space in that because we only. We only get what we have the capacity to receive too. So creating space is so important.

Say that again.

We only get what we have the capacity to receive.

So that's so good.

Mm.

And we can only give others. We can only meet others as deeply as we've met ourselves.

Mm. We can only give true, genuine, authentic love if we've given genuine, authentic love to our own self and we've had compassion and empathy for ourselves through all of our many stages and phases of life and growth and development. And via that, empathy is born for others as well. Because we remember. We remember. We can call upon that wisdom and recognize that, you know, we're all calibrating and we're all synthesizing and expanding in our own unique rhythm and in our Own unique way. Mm. Yeah. So that's how compassion and empathy are born. And to remember is a key to when we're on top. To remember what we have been through and what we have experienced so that we can have a depth of understanding for others when they're going through those spaces, too, and become more responsive and less reactionary over time. But that's all also a part of the growth process, because sometimes we literally just have to shake those triggers out. You know, we've got to be with them, fully, feel them, fully resonate them, express them, move the energy from our system before we're not triggered anymore. Because if somebody. So if you think of yourself as a symphony or an orchestra, and you've got, like, a part of you that's not resonating totally in tune, and another being comes along and they've got that same thing that's not totally resonating in tune. And so instead of you two harmonizing, you start bumping up against those chords in each other, like, ooh, ooh. And it just brings more and more attention to that part that needs to be brought into harmonic resonance and alignment. And so it's a gift in so many ways. And it can be such a pain. Literally, it can be such a pain. And sometimes we just need to. So one of the ways that I like to facilitate the alchemy of this when that happens, is to have holistic, creative outlets to express the energy. Because really, what needs to happen is the energy needs to move through the body. It needs to have the space in the environment for it to fully unleash its expression. And so whatever ways that we feel most called to express in those moments, it's just really important to move the energy. So there's about. You know, there's hundreds of different ways that we can do this, and there's techniques. I take more of a tribal approach, and I go towards what feels natural. I'm like, do I need to do tribal dance right now? Do I need to dance around a fire and do an invocation? Do I need to drum? Do I need to chant? Do I need to stomp? Do I need to go for a run? Do I just need to take deep breaths in and out? What do I need? And that. Just finding what that is so that we can move and release the core trigger, and that'll transmute it too. And when you're done, you're like, yes, it's such a relief.

Yeah, I really love dance for that. Channeling any kind of anger, frustration, sadness, anything just feels good.

In the body, it's its own kind of energetic bath because you're just moving mountains of energy through your body that needs to come through. It's just. And you're giving that energy expression for the collective, too, that may have been suppressing it or caging it in or holding it in. And, you know, you're moving it. You're moving it for all of us. And so it's such a huge gift to do that and to have fun with it, you know, to really value those parts of yourself, your warrior, your badass, your sage, all those parts of you artist, your magician, your priestess, your I am presence, all, even the animals that you shape shift through. That's one of the things I love to observe. And there's. I'm like, what animal am I embodying right now? And I get into the full embodiment of that creature, and that's pretty mythical and fun and powerful and revealing of a lot of the. The wisdom that is connected into that specific being and into those specific animals. So if even finding in through the embodiment. So cats, big cats, leopards, come up for me a lot when I'm.

Me too.

Yeah. Especially with that intensity of energy, you know, like, we'll watch and we'll observe and we'll wait, and we're aware of our power and our strength. And when it's time to hunt or when it's time to act, we will and. Yeah. And so getting to know all the characteristics and the magic and the medicine of those animals too, and connecting with them in nature and finding a deep respect for all of those different attributes within the totem, but also within you, the parts of you that embody those qualities and the moments that you're called to embody those qualities and having a reverence for them instead of pushing away or resisting them or labeling them as not good or, you know, however we perceive them to be, but seeing the extreme beauty and wisdom that's encoded in them.

Well, it's really like anything. Anytime that we're letting go of something or feeling something intensely, we don't want to feel it. We think we can think maybe it's wrong. And it's just like, I'm thinking of coffee. I stopped drinking coffee, and I really used to never drink coffee, and I used to never need it, and I started drinking it a lot. This is simple, right? And now I don't feel like I need it, and that's fine. But sugar, I love chocolate. And I decided that I'm going to detox as of Next week, I'm like, I'm not going to have any sugar for 30 days. Take it to 90 days, go from there. And when we're detoxing or releasing something, we have a craving for it. It's really uncomfortable, but that's actually a sign that our body is releasing it. It's detoxing. So it's actually a really beautiful thing to feel those spaces that are uncomfortable that come with the releasing, because it's a sign that you're actually releasing. If you go back to the thing thinking that you're craving it, well, it starts all over again. And so I just thought of chocolate. Like, I'm just detoxing everything. What else? What else?

You literally just like, name my staples. Those are the staples. Maple syrup, raw cacao, coffee. Those are amongst my actual staples.

Yeah. I love chocolate. My favorite thing that's. I'm like, I need to detox from it at least with sugar for a while. Right. If it's just. If it's just cacao, like, okay, but no sugar. Right.

That's the only sugar that I have. But I love it and I savor it, and I wouldn't give it up to the world. Also, to put things in context intermittent, fast every day and eat a plethora of fruits and vegetables and. Yeah, balanced. So I'm kind of on a continuous cleanse. And drink about a gallon of water a day, too.

That's amazing.

You always see me during our call.

Oh, my God. I got your whole big water bottle with you. I have one of those, too. I just don't use it all the time. I feel like I should bring it over these combos.

I picked that up when I used to be a personal trainer because I. You know, it's funny because I have my crystal water bottles, which I fill and I take with me to spaces, but I just drink through a whole gallon in a day. And I'm just like, I'll just drink out of the gallon unless I need to fill this.

Pardon?

I said I'll just drink out of the gallon unless I need to fill this. Because by time, I drink out of the crystal. I mean, that's like. One serving of water for me is actually literally a bottle for most people.

Yeah, right. I was gonna say, what kind of crystals do you put in your water?

So right now there's rose quartz, amethyst, and clear quartz. But what I would love to put in is opal and malachite.

Yeah.

But particularly opal. Opal has such a extra sensory, subtle, refined, gentle, exotic Alienesque quality to it that just allows me to. There's like, no veils when I. When I have access to that. That crystal and just access sacred geometry and other life forms with such exquisite ease. And I love that. So to encode my cells with that would be divine. Although when I do my visioning and my meditation, I line my body with crystals, and I often put opal, either opal or citrine, on my third eye. So that's a good one for activating.

I just got a citrine crystal. Yeah, I don't know much about citrine. I just know that someone told me in Bali that I need it based on the day that I'm born. So I'm like, okay, I probably should look into it.

Well, power, abundance, gold. It's a good one to put on your heart too. I love to put my citrine right on my heart because to me, that's the true representation of gold, is your heart. Your heart of abundance. And if you can zone into that, laser, into that, cultivate that, and then express that out, you'll always be abundantly supplied, your reality, without question, in really profound and miraculous magical ways. So, yeah, citrine, gold, the gold that you are, power of the sun, solar power, enrichment, all of that. Yeah. Bliss. Bliss is a really beautiful frequency, but it's a savory grounded, you know, kind of where you're really just in love, in joy with what you're experiencing and what you're doing and creating. Yeah, it's a good stone for all of that.

I love it. Maybe I put on a necklace or something, right? Why not? That was so nice. I love chatting with you.

Yeah, ditto. I love you.

Thank you for I love you. So what did we cover today? We talked about illumination. Like, illumination, the truth. When you're, like, weren't expecting to find a truth. We talked a little bit about.

Ooh.

We talked about being in the storm, just, you know, the chaos. What else do we talk about? There's so many things. Crystals. We talked about letting go, detoxing. What else?

Alchemy, catharsis. Express expression. Knowing yourself, knowing your own rhythms and cycles and organic flow. Staying true to yourself, architecting your own rules and belief structures and not living by others.

Life by design. Yeah.

Following the expansion of your soul instead of shrinking back into old patterns. Citrine.

Yes, citrine capacity. Also our capacity. Awareness. Different than capacity. You gotta get into a space of expansion and more capacity and expanding our.

Capacity to receive and therefore have and honoring the deep spaces of self cultivation and fertilization, when we're called to nourish ourselves, particularly in that beautiful in between space where we're transitioning into a new embodiment. So a good example of this, I'm just gonna give it real quick before we hop off. Have you ever seen those videos where they hook the electrodes up to a machine and they pour the salt on it and they keep turning up the frequency, the hertz?

Ooh, no, I haven't seen this.

Okay, awesome. Go to the science page on my website and there's a video and you can watch it. The reason that that's there is because this is what happens in our physical body when we go through an upgrade and optimization. We break glass ceilings, we expand all of the ways that we label that it's growth. We are transitioning from one pattern of sacred geometry to another octave which is an expanded resonance, an expanded pattern, frequency, tone. It has more dynamism and complexity to it because it contains all the previous patterns before it. But we're literally going through that visceral expansion of our sacred geometry. So we're going through a fundamental realignment. And when we're at one level of experience, our sacred geometry is kind of in. I mean, it's still flexible and pliable, but it's in a pattern. It's in a geometrical expression of itself. And although it's still flowing, it's in that formation. When we go through the calibration, all of that energy shifts and becomes destabilized. So there's moments when chaos, until it finds its new higher order. So chaos always precedes order. Any type of dissonance precedes a greater harmony. Any friction, tension, resistance, catharsis, all of that always precedes more bliss, more resonance, more joy, that alignment to self. And so it's a natural part of our evolutionary process as well. So it's always a really good thing, beautiful thing when you're experiencing that, when we are, when I am, when we all go through that, you know, like, okay, all of this is going on, Whatever's coming next is going to be huge and brilliant and magnificent and I'm so excited for it. And right now I'm going to surrender to this so that that full expansion can occur.

Yes. And right now I'm just going to let go. And that's so true. I'm like, I'm so excited. I'm so excited. I'm so excited for you and your expansion that's coming because you did some releasing. I'm so excited for my expansion. So excited for everyone's expansion. And the chaos, the mess is just so that we can see things clearly, so that we can clean up what we need to clean up and come back home to ourself and our heart and nourish that. And that is really the core of it all. Because if we can't nourish ourselves, we can't really nourish anyone else or anything else fully to its full capacity.

So juicy. The golden dawn is upon us, and we are raising the quality of energy on our planet. Hallelujah.

Hallelujah. I love you.

I love you, too.

Beautiful.

Have an exquisite evening, and I will connect with you on Monday. And in the meantime, I'll be sending you lots of magical juju and warm, peaceful, luscious, abundant vibrations.

Bye.