Susan Britton MCC explains why curiosity beats commonality in coaching. Relating a client's story to your own experience shuts down depth. Instead, listen without self-reference and ask open questions like "What was that like for you?" to help clients find their own insights.
Susan here, walking, thinking, and offering a coaching tip. So I was thinking about connection and how easy it is to try to connect with people through commonality. In coaching, however, it's important that we connect with people through curiosity as opposed to commonality. And what I mean by that is if somebody says something to you and it reminds you of something that happened to you, it's easy to say, oh yeah, I get that, and make that connection via that commonality. Instead, if we can stop and just listen to what somebody is saying and be curious about it, not related to ourselves, but ask, wow, what was that like for you when that happened? What, what were you thinking? What were your thoughts? What, what went through your mind? How did you feel when that happened? Those are the kinds of connections that really then cause people to get in touch with themselves and think about how they feel, how they want to feel, how they want to be. And then you've got a deeper connection for learning and growth.
Susan’s ICF Educator Award | The Heart Behind the Impact Katy Montgomery, PCC
