Managing Stress at Work (feat. John Rampton)

Hi, I'm Susan Drumm, and welcome to the Enlightened Executive, where your personal evolution sparks your leadership evolution. Each episode we feature groundbreaking techniques and strategies to help you get the edge in personal and leadership effectiveness. Today, I'm really excited to be talking with John Rampton. John was recently named the top online influencer in the world by Entrepreneur magazine. Time magazine recognized John as a motivational speaker who helps people find a sense of meaning in their lives. And he now advises companies on how to manage their growth strategies. And his story of how he overcame devastating odds after a horrible construction accident to become who he is today is truly inspiring and enlightening. And he's with us today to inspire us and share his winning formula for success. So I'm so grateful to have you on the show. Welcome, John.

Hey, thanks for having me.

Your story is really compelling, and I can't wait for our listeners to hear about it. And it's wonderful when I get this opportunity to bring on another executive who is walking the path of enlightened leadership and on their path to doing so. But maybe we can start a little bit about your story. And so if you could share a bit, what happened to you related to the accident and what was the impact?

Yeah, I mean, this goes back a while, guys, but, you know, I was working at a construction site on the nights, weekends, days off. I was going to college at this time, and I was just trying to make, like, ends meet and, you know, trying to pay for college. I, you know, wasn't born with silver spot spoon. I had to pay for everything. So, you know, naturally, you know, you'll run out of money if you just keep spending. And I didn't want to be in student loans, so I worked at a construction site. And while I was at the construction site, I was spraying off construction equipment with a hose. And one of the guys not paying attention and unbeknownst to me, was backing up in the wrong direction, and he ended up hitting the back of my leg and running over and basically snapping my leg in half, hit me from behind and snapped it forward. So it was not a fun thing to do. I don't recommend anybody. Here, try it. But, you know, that was one of those pivotal moments in my life where, you know, up until that point, I was like, all right, let's go to school. And I, up to that point, I had a goal of being a pharmaceutical sales representative. That was my goal in life. That's what I wanted to be. Right? Yeah. And that's what, like, I was going to college Learning sales, learning how to do this, learning to become the best me possible. Well, you know, over the course of the next, like three months, I was told by 13 doctors I would never walk again. Wow. Like, never walk like doctor after doctor after doctor. And I just wheelie up into their office and they'd be like, sorry, you're. You're not going to be able to walk. And you know, that was. That was crushing to me because my dream up to that point had been, hey, I'm going to be a pharmaceutical sales rep. You know, and they're kind of required to walk a lot and go up and down stairs and be whining and dining people all day long. And, you know, it just wasn't necessarily in my cards. So, you know, finally I met one doctor, and one doctor's like, hey, I have this new thing, it's called stem cell research. He's like, I've never tested on somebody your age ever. And he's like, you would be the first client in the US and you have to sign all these things. And I have to sign off that it's a pre medical procedure and it's not fda, it's not anything approved. We're going to test it out on you. And I was like, wait, so you're saying I might have a chance to walk? All right, let's try that. I had one doctor from Norway, another one from Finland, and they ended up flying to the United States and working with a bunch of staff in there, and they did surgery on me. And then over the course of the next three years, really, really, it was 12 months. They did extensive. I had about four surgeries, had a rod in my leg, tons of pins, wasn't able to walk. Had one of those cold ice machines around my leg. I was sponge bath bomb for, I think, eight months. I had a catheter in me, like I could not move. And the guy's like, hey, you have to consent to doing all this because I want to give it the best shot. And I was like, I'll do anything. So, you know, they did all these surgeries on me. They injected me with stem cells, and over the course of the next year, started to regrow the bone in my leg that was completely shattered, completely gone. During this time, you know, I. I had medical bills piling up. I was still trying to go to school. And the person that ran me over, obviously, you know what, what's common in the insurance world, in the construction world is none of them have insurance at all. So we got there and they're like, oh yeah, we'll take care of everything. And then two weeks later, an attorney got involved on their side. And I'm like, that's really weird. They said they'd pay for everything. And then they were like, oh, you are trespassing on this thing. And I'm like, well, I have like four paychecks from you. Like, they went completely the opposite direction. It was terrible. So I hired an attorney, went after them. I ended up winning. I. It ended up going to the state of Utah and their workers comp ended up paying for my entire life, which was one of the biggest unforeseen blessings of my life. Amazing at the time, but, you know, during this time, I had to pay for things. I had to pay for school, I had to pay for food, I had to pay for. I'd love to say I was going on dates, but I wasn't. Usually the dates were, dates were coming to me and just making sure I was okay. I had to rethink my entire life. I couldn't potentially walk even this doctor was like, hey, you're never going to be able to run a marathon again. You're never going to be able to go on extensive hikes. You're never going to be able to do the things that you're used to doing every single day of your life. And I was like, okay, but I'll be able to walk. Right? And he's like, I think so. I'm like, I think. And you're going through all this not knowing. Before we started, you said you I could. Yeah, for sure. But now you're. I think that's awkward.

What did you learn through this process? You know, I imagine you had a lot of soul searching time to do that. But what, first of all, what helped you and what did you learn?

Biggest learn for me was I learned a lot about what was truly important to me during this time. Because when you're in bed for 24 hours a day, seven days a week, you want to have a ton of time to think. It's annoying how much time you have to think. But two, you start really prioritizing the people, things, food, energy and mental effort that you have because you just don't have mental effort. I was always on pain meds, I was always on this, on that, trying to move to the next day. So it really taught me a lot about myself and how I as a person can live the way I am. So.

And what did, what specifically did it teach you about yourself?

Yeah. So biggest learning about myself is I learned that I can survive. I mean, truly, like, I can survive. I'm empowered. I can do things. I don't have to walk in order to live, in order to move forward, in order to be me.

How does that impact your leadership today with the company that you run? How do you think that experience makes you better leader?

One? It annoys my wife that I say it this much, that I say it so much. But one of my things that I say a lot is, it'll work itself out. Like, and I say it way too much. Like, during that time, I was like, dude, why do I need to worry about this? Like, it'll work itself out. Whether it's good, whether it's bad, it will work itself out. So why do I need to do this? Life couldn't have gotten worse at that. Well, it could. Life can always get worse. Just also know that life can always, always get worse. But in my mind at the time, life couldn't get worse. And that taught me just like, hey, you know, everything's going to work itself out. It's going to be. It's not that great, but it'll work itself out.

And so how does that show up today in the way you lead your team?

I just don't worry about a lot of things. Like, so many people are so concerned with details and, you know, did this press release go out? Is my product perfect? Is my car the right car? Is this the right fit for our team? Oh, this person said this. I don't think I should be friends with them. I think in my life, I just have a, hey, it'll work itself out. If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. And if it's not, like, not, you know, I didn't. I didn't worry too much about it. I didn't spend too much time really anguishing over this problem or this solution or this product or, you know, anything like that. So I think it's made me be a much better leader from the fact that I take steps back. I let people make their own mistakes and learn from their mistakes and, hey, it'll work itself out.

Yeah. Yeah. And so I'm curious to know if you know how your team might describe you as a leader. Do you have any sense for that?

Yeah. So my team, I've asked them this many times, so literally every day. I'm just joking. It'll work itself out. They would just say, I'm a very relaxed, sometimes overly relaxed person that doesn't worry about problems or if this will happen or if that won't happen to give you an example of this. One time we had this huge project and the project went out and was deployed and like, literally hundreds of thousands of people saw it. And my business partner calls me up, frantic, and he's like, hey, it had like, step one, step two, step three, and step four was like, hey, make sure to do this. Like, make sure to put something in here or do this. And then it went step six, step seven. And it was something that I was supposed to do. And he calls me up, like, frantic. Like, hundreds of people are seeing this. We're spending so much money, they can't do this. And I'm like, oh, man, that's really funny. All right, let me go get that fixed. But I'm at dinner right now, so I can get to it in probably, like, 45 minutes. That's kind of how I am about a lot of things. Like, yes, it's a mistake. Yes, people are going to make mistakes. Yes, there's problems, but it's not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things, you guys, you're going to make mistakes, you're going to have problems, you're going to have to fire people. You're going to hire the wrong people. You might get divorced, you might get married, you might have problems in your marriage, you might have problems with a boyfriend, girlfriend, you might have problems with your co founder. If you're so anxious and so uptight every single day, it'll eat you apart. I would say try and take a step back and try and be like, hey, I'm doing the best job I can. Give yourself a little bit of a break. If you can't do that, go out and do something where you know it'll take your mind off it and you can't think about things.

Well, that's great because one of the things that we measure in our 360s is composure. And I have a sense that that ability, both caring, connection, which I think you bring in spades, but also this ability to calm under pressure and not to add to the stress. There are lots of leaders I see that amp up. Everyone is stressed as it is, you know, post pandemic and coming out of this, and then the leader adds to it. And my sense is, what you do, your secret sauce, is deflate the pressure cooker for people so that they can do their best work and people will.

Do their best work. Like, you gotta just trust in your team, trust that they'll do their best and know that it'll work itself out.

Yeah. And so Tell us a little bit about what you're doing today. What is your work and what do you love about it?

Yeah, so I today I'm an entrepreneur. I have several differentpreneurs. I have a couple different companies that I'm involved in. My main focus is a company called calendar, calendar.com. and we are a calendar app for business owners and individuals like yourself.

Great, great. And you also do some writing as well, right? You write for some of the publications?

I do. I blog a lot. When I got hurt in that accident, I'll pull you back a little bit and explain a few things on that. When I got hurt in that accident, I didn't know what I was going to do, but I still had to make money. So I found this whole online thing and I started working in the online worlds and started making money and started finding that people pay bloggers or pay this or pay that. Along the way of making money doing that, I found that there is an influence in blogging. And the more that I can get my name out there, the more I can write about and talk about my own companies in ways online. So that's kind of got into blogging. I started working, you know, for a small publication. Then I worked my way up and then I got on Huffington Post and then I got on Forbes, then Inc. Then Entrepreneur, then Wall Street Journal, then all these major publications and just started using my expertise and using my connections to leverage higher and higher connections. And all of a sudden I became this blogging expert. I don't look at myself as a blogging expert or. But I do command a lot of knowledge online because I have worked my way up. Just like at a business or a company, you know, you got to climb the ladder. I did that in the blogging world.

So what wisdom can you share with others going through tough times or working on finding their path to leadership?

Yeah, I mean, my wisdom, take it for what it's worth. But you can do this. You're your most powerful, like cheerleader. You're also your worst critic. So don't be too hard on yourself. Stuff happens. You are going to make bad decisions, but you have made a lot of really good decisions along the way. So I just say, keep going. Believe in yourself. You can do this. If you believe in yourself, there is nothing that can hold you back.

Yes. I also see in you there's a lot of faith and trust in the future. You couldn't have gone forward with a very experimental surgery had you not had that. And then keep going. Even in the face of Them telling you, well, maybe it'll work out.

Right.

And so you had to draw on that. What keeps that alive for you?

I mean, there's always been kind of a drive in me for being better, having more. You know, I didn't grow up rich. I grew up with an abusive father. I grew up with friends, family members, parents in jail. And, you know, I always wanted more and always, you know, kept pushing and believing in myself. I think another drive for me is outside of myself. I have nobody to fall back on.

Yes.

So I don't have a family that could ever support me. I couldn't even move in with my parents. My parents live with either me or my sister or depend on us financially. I have nobody to fall back on. So there's always been this like, drive of, hey, there's nobody but me here. So if it doesn't work out, it's not going to work out. So that's always been the drive behind me. And a lot of people don't have that. I think, you know, some of the entrepreneurs, you know, not saying this is the case, but I went to a very influential conference and we actually sent out an email survey to be at this conference. You had to most of the people, I'd say the average net worth is probably like $200 million. And this was sent out to about 400 different people. And it was one question. Did you have a messed up childhood? Yes or no? Wow. What? The response was 84% of people had a messed up childhood. There are things that have happened in your past. There are problems that you've had, you know, parent problems, sibling problems, this, that, everything. Like, you can do this. If they can do it, you can do it. Most of those people, you're probably much smarter than any of them. You are. It's not because they're smarter. It's not because they're more this. It's not because it's more that they believe in themselves and they move forward. So my biggest recommendation to you would be, you know, just keep pushing forward. Believe in yourself. You can do it.

That's such an interesting statistic. I'm so glad you brought it up. And I think sometimes people think of those that made it. They had, you know, it given to them and they came from a silver spoon.

And some do. Some do.

Yeah, some do.

Which is great.

Yeah.

But I would say the majority actually, from that, the majority did not.

Yes. So it's not to let your past really define your future. It doesn't have to define your future. At the end Give yourself.

You guys, give yourself permission. Give yourself permission. Be like, I'm done. Like, I even. I have a thing where I give myself permission to be down sometimes for five minutes or 10 minutes, and I actually set a stopwatch. I'm like, I have the next 15 minutes. It's okay. I'm going to be down, and after that, I'm going to buck myself up. And I do it for my kids. I do it for. I'm like, all right, Addie, which is my daughter. I'm like, you can cry for five minutes. Let's set a timer. And she's like, can I have six? I'm like, okay, you can have six minutes. Go cry. And she just, balls, balls, balls. And then after six minutes, bam, she jumps up and she's the happiest thing in the whole world. Like, you can believe in yourself, but at the same time, allow yourself to have fear. Allow yourself to all these different things, but give yourself a timeline on it and then jump out of it, because you can.

Are there any other strategies like that that you found really helpful in navigating the ups and downs of leadership?

Yeah, a lot of it is around doing things where I cannot think about the crappy things that are going on. So I bought jet skis. And when you're out on a jet Ski, it's just you jumping waves, doing random stuff out in the middle of a lake. You can't think about anything but that. Same on a snowmobile. I find recreational vehicles are very, very good for this because you're thinking about all these random things. If you're in your car, you're so used to driving a car that you'll think about things. But go do something where you're constantly in a new element that you have to think like a mountain bike. Go mountain bike down. Down the side of a hill. You can't think about anything but that. A hike, not so much. You'll sit, and then you'll slow down and you'll go. And you'll be like, oh, my word. Everything's going so terribly right now. It might be going terribly, but do something to take your mind off that. I find that when I do that, it takes my mind completely, completely away from whatever problem or negative thing is in my life, and I feel so much better afterward. And.

Yeah.

So which it has to be. It has to be an activity that. That you don't have, that that gives.

You full presence, is what I say. You have to be fully present in those examples. You can't be distracted and thinking about your problems. But what does taking that time out, I mean, the problem's still there when you come back. But what has it given you to take that time away where you're not.

Thinking about just gives me ultimately a lot more focus and it basically proves to me that, hey, this problem's still there. But guess what? I just had like an hour where I didn't think about this at all. And it was okay, it's all right.

Yeah, right.

I will be okay.

I think it puts it in perspective because we can get sort of swallowed by the problem in a way because we're in it and I can't find my way out. But when you step outside and you do something active like that, where you have to be fully present, then, then I think it diminishes in importance or all encompassing and even just if it diminishes by 5%, that's 5% that you get back that you can possibly come up with a new idea on how to solve it. That's why they say when you're in the shower, you have the ideas because you're doing something else. You're not going at it. And helps with writer's block and all sorts of places where you get stuck 100%. So what's next for you on your enlightened journey? What are you working on personally or professionally?

My biggest thing that I'm working on personally is getting a better relationship with myself and my kids and myself and my wife. I find myself in the business world sometimes those get neglected. And I found really focusing on that. You know, I've started a new routine that's for about the past six months, I go home. I'm home at the exact same time every single day. My phone and my watch, because these stupid watches now are connected. My phone and my watch get taken off and get put in a specific thing and I don't touch them again until a specific time. And that's that for me is for the first month was unbearable. You know, I had FOMO every two seconds and you know, this anxiety in me was like I have to. What happens if, what happens if the servers go down? What happens if. Blah, blah, blah. A million things can go wrong. Guess what if they go wrong? Like people can wait, they can wait two or three hours. It's not going to make that big of a difference. Especially at night. It's so much more important to prioritize the things that are important to you. Like true long time importance, an employee. How long do employees last at a job? Not that Long. How long are those people, your family or certain things going to be in your life? It's going to be for a lot longer than a couple of years. Brothers, sisters, mom, dad, friends. I prioritize those over a lot more work and I dedicate time for those. So it's been something I've been learning and that I'm really working on is those relationships again right now for me, it's the personal. It's the kids and the wife. But I plan on extending that a lot more to friends. I'm trying to be a lot more thoughtful. I try and send one text message every day to someone that I have not communicated with for 30 days. I falter at that. I forget for like two weeks and then I do it for two months and blah, blah, blah. I'm not perfect, you guys. Don't be like, oh, my word, he's so perfect. I'm not like, I'm just like you guys. There is no difference between me and you. Like, there's no difference at all. We're the same person. Just I'm trying a different thing than you are. So that's what I'm working on personally and then professionally just more so. Becoming a better me standing, me growing amazing teams and yeah, more.

Awesome. Well, how can people connect with you?

So how can people connect with me? I am John Rampton on Rampton Online. Just Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, all the same. Or johnrampton.com can also find us online@calendar.com awesome.

Well, thanks so much for sharing your story and your path and what it's taught you and your wisdom and tips and tricks that have worked for you. It's been incredibly enlightening and I appreciate you taking the time.

Thanks, guys.

If you like this episode, you're not going to want to miss my interview with Dina Kaplan, founder and CEO of the Path, another enlightening program that people have embraced for their own personal and professional development. Until next time, hope you enjoyed today's episode and I'd like to point you to the next important step. Hit the subscribe button to get notified when we release new content. I'll see you on the next episode of the Enlightened Executive.

Sam.