Denying Your Values is Like Hiding a Secret. Bad For Your Health.

Foreign.

Hi. If you're here, you might know. This is Susie Welch. Hi, it's Susie Welch. Welcome to Becoming youg. Becoming youg is a methodology. It is what this podcast is about. Roughly speaking, it's a methodology that helps you answer the question, what should I do with my life? Which we all have all the time, even me, even famous people, even people just starting out. But it's also a lifelong methodology that you return to again and again when you are wondering, wait, is this the right thing for me to be doing? I teach it at NYU Stern School of Business. I'm super glad you're here. And today we are going to talk about fame. I mean, Jorge, at this point, would you cut in the song Fame, I'm gonna live forever. I don't know. I might be the only person who. Every time I hear the word fame, I think I'm gonna live forever. Do you all think that? Do you all think Fame, I'm gonna live forever? Team no. Oh, God, I'm old. Do you even know what I'm talking about? Okay. Do you even know what I'm talking about? You do? Yes. Oh, okay. I'm fine. Okay. They're humoring me right now. Okay, so look, today we're gonna talk about fame, because fame is one of the becoming you, 15 core values. As a concept and a methodology, becoming you is based on the fact that there are 15 core values that all of us have in some degree or another. And part of the work of becoming you was figuring out what. What your values DNA profile is, what matters the most to you, what matters the least to you, and which of your values are in conflict and which are in harmony. Stick with me. This is all gonna make sense. But in today's episode, I'm gonna start off by talking about the value of fame, which, in becoming you, a vocabulary we call status. Why? Because the word fame wigs people out. Okay? Fame is. You know, there's this dichotomy in the world of business, and not all of you own business, so. But in any walk of life that leaders are good. We exalt leaders. Leaders are like Mother Teresa, okay? And we revile managers. Managers are grunty little bureaucrats, okay? And there's this. There's this false dichotomy because you need to be a leader and manager at the same time. That's for another podcast. But the same thing is about. Is true about the word fame. We all sort of automatically hold our noses, and nobody actually, or very few people actually come out and say, I want to be Famous. It's one of my values. But I want to tell you one thing for certain. Everybody who is famous has wanted to be famous, generally. Okay? I'm sure there's exceptions, but you think Lady Gaga didn't want to be famous. You think Madonna didn't want to be famous. You think Henry Kissinger didn't want to be famous. You think that Howard Schultz didn't want to be famous. It takes work to become famous. And therefore I'm going to back out of that. That people had it as a value. And like all values, I think it's super important. Just one thing, because if you're not hurting anyone with your life, I'm a values agnostic. Value what you want. You came to your values honestly by experience.

And I just think that what harms people, and I'm talking about you and the people around you, is when you have a value and you don't admit it. Because the road to authenticity is paved with us being honest about our values, including our values around money, achievement and family. Okay? These are very not generic values. We want more or less of these things in our life, okay? And their values, you just have to make sure they're not in conflict. All right, so why am I talking about fame? Why?

Why?

Why? Well, the other day I was invited to the U.S. open by my bank. They're very nice, J.P. morgan, I love you. And they have a box there. And I was invited to go to the US Open and sit in their fancy schmancy box, which is always a hoot. I've done it many years. And they always have a lot of other fancy schmancy people there. Not that I would include myself in that category. They have fancy people there for us to get our pictures taken with and to chit chat with. Well, who was there when I walked in the door? I walked in the door and somebody said to me, immediately, there's Steph Curry. Now, I'm not a gigantic basketball fan, but I know greatness when I'm in the room with it. And he is, to my mind, a great. I mean, who? Just raise your hand if you think Steph Curry is not great. Okay? I knew it. So I thought, I'm going to try to unpick my thoughts. I didn't think, oh, I want to be in the presence of fame and greatness. I thought, oh, my God, I have to have this picture for my newsletter, for LinkedIn and for my kids, okay? Because all I know is that when my kids were in high school, I went to a party and Neil Degrasse Tyson was there and I got my picture taken with him. And suddenly I was taken very seriously. I mean, it was just like a life changing experience. Like, you were near that guy. Anyway, I thought, I'm gonna get my picture taken with Steph Curry. And then somebody said, you know who's standing next to him, don't you? That's Andy Roddick. And I was like, okay. Again, I'm not sure who that exactly is because I'm not a big tennis person, but I was vaguely aware that this was a well known tennis player. And I managed to get a picture with both of them. And I think I'm cringing a lot as I'm taking these pictures. I definitely said, I huge admire both of you. And then I know you won't be surprised to know that I looked directly at Steph Curry and said, would you ever speak in my class at nyu? I'm just shameless. Shameless. I'll ask anybody who might bring value. And he was like, ha ha, yeah, that's great. You know, like random lady. Random lady who I'll spend approximately 10 seconds of my life with. So I got my picture with both of them and I thought I. This is definitely a moment for me to talk to the people who listen to me and my various platforms about fame. And all I ask is that you have a candid conversation with yourself in that moment that nobody does. I actually, when I did the three day intensive in New York, which, by the way, any of my intensive participants that are listening, I love you so much. That was a great life experience. And we'll do it again. There was at one point where I said, please shut your eyes and allow yourself to imagine the life that you want with no editing. You get exactly what you want, you do exactly what you dream you want to do. There are no constraints. You let yourself imagine it. We never do that. I don't even do that. I mean, I edit myself immediately. I'm an editor by trade. And man, when it comes to my life dreams, I start editing the minute I hear myself, let myself think something that amazing could happen. And when you do that, like, and you close your eyes and you start to imagine this life 20 years hence. You got everything. You did everything. How famous are you? How much celebrity do you have now? Look, I know from being married to a famous person for 20 years that fame has its amazing upsides, like access and clout and validation. You know, like walking down the street. People just used to stop my husband and say things like, you know, I modeled My whole business career in you. You, because of you and the stock options you gave all employees. My family has sent four children to college or has a boat or whatever. And you get this incredible love back and validation a lot of the times. And you get to be able to, I'm not going to lie here. You get to call an incredibly popular restaurant at 6 o' clock and make a reservation for 6:15. Okay? That kind of thing that goes with fame. It also has downsides. And you know, these are cliches, but you definitely lose your privacy. People talk about you in not friendly ways a lot of times and you lose a sense of personal security for sure. And when I see people talk about you in nasty ways. Right after I got married to Jack, I was part of a group of mommy friends who I loved and trusted and who I had confided to when Jack and I were first together. And I had raised my kids with this group of moms. Our kids were all best friends and. And I adored them and I thought they sincerely adored me. And at one point they were trying to arrange a play date. And I wrote into the group email, this is really hard for me. I'm traveling. I have to very unfortunately, I'll miss this birthday party because I have to go to Japan, blah, blah, blah. And I wrote it and I said, I'll miss you all so much, please don't forget me. Or something like that. And again, I had been friends with these mothers for years and about two seconds later my phone bings and. And one of the mothers had thought that she was hitting forward, but she'd actually hit reply. And she wrote something like, well, well, well, look what the new Mrs. Welch. Da, da, da. And she like took me down and took me apart in the most unbelievable, like, bitchy, scathing, obnoxious way. And I just sat there and I thank God for that experience. I thank God with everything in me because it taught me the true lesson you need to know about becoming famous, which was people are very nice to your face and they can be unbelievably, unspeakably cruel behind it. So I just stared at it. I felt sick to my stomach. Here was a big problem. Her son and my son were best friends. Best friends, I mean, and I didn't want to ruin that friendship and I didn't want to get in the way of it, but she had just kicked me in the stomach. It was brutal what she said. And the thing was like, I was like a little doe. I mean, I was like, I was sincerely telling them that my life was not my own anymore. They had known me as a divorced mother, but now I had a life that was not my own. And I thought that I had, like, abjectly apologized and talked about how much I loved them, and she just took me apart. I was mortified. I actually couldn't even speak. And it was a great lesson. I didn't really realize it in the moment. In the moment, I just was heartbroken and concerned because how do I preserve the relationship between Marcus and that little boy? They were probably in fourth grade at the time or third grade. And an hour later, the doorbell rang, and I went down to the front door, and she was standing there, and she said, we're not friends anymore, are we? And I said, we are not, but let's not let this affect the boys. And she said, okay. I said, I love your son, and I want him to be part of my son's life forever. And she said, but this is it for us. There's no way I can apologize. And I said, I don't think so. And I'll say, that boy was at Marcus's wedding. That boy is a friend of mine on all my platforms. And he and Marcus are still dear friends, and she and I are cordial to each other on all social media platforms. But, man, I'm grateful to her for showing me what fame does to people. So I know the upsides and downsides. It wasn't the only time something horrible had happened like that. But, man, so many good things happen, too. So I have had a relationship with fame, which I've had to learn as I've gotten older. And now as I'm poised to have my book come out and my own profile is growing along with the acceptance and embrace of becoming you, I've sort of had to ask myself the same question I'm asking you to ask yourself, which is like, how much do I want of this? Why do I want it? And.

Do I want to be as famous as Steph Curry or Andrew Roddick? Or do I want to have some privacy left? Because those people have no privacy, and they sometimes probably have no sense of personal security, and they are scrutinized in a way that's not very pleasant. But there's always a but with every value. Anyway, that's my little screen. On fame today, we never talk about it as a value, but this is the last thing I'll say about it. And. And as you know, I often say it's the last thing, and then it's not. But I would say this is the last thing I'm gonna say about it. I came up with the Becoming youg Values vocabulary because I didn't believe that any of the current tools that were available widely included all the values that our current culture has in it. For instance, the most notable famous values inventory is the Schwartz Values Inventory, which was created as an academic rubric. And, and it doesn't have flexibility as a value. And I think that that's a huge value for a lot of people today. It doesn't have fame either. And I do think in our always on very social media influencer based culture, that fame has become a value that people grapple with because it's available to so many more people. So I put it out there for you to think about along with all your other values, and we'll put it all together as becoming you goes along. But when you're thinking about that becoming you, question is, what should I do with my life? You also have to be clear and candid with yourself about how much fame you really want that drives your actions and your behaviors and your decisions. And so you might as well get honest with yourself about it and then be honest with everyone around you. There's no crime in it if you're not hurting anybody. None whatsoever. All right, that is the end of my screed for today about fame. And I'm not gonna sing I'm gonna Live Forever, but actually, you know, psychologist, I'm doing it. I said I wouldn't say one more thing. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it anyway. Okay, all right. This is officially the last thing I'm going to say about fame. When social psychologists and true psychologists, psychiatrists, talk about fame and talk about why people want it, it is linked to the impulse for immortality, okay? That is thought to be the psychological driver of it. I think it's. How dare I say this as a person who's not yet received her PhD but is on the road there, how dare I say this? But I'm going to say I think that's a simplistic explanation. Of course it has something to do with immortality, but it has something else to do with validation and access and clout and so forth. And really validation more than anything at all, Validation while we're living, okay? Because if you think it's just immortality, it's after we're gone. But fame gives us something immediately. And so I think there's a wider explanation for it. And you know what? I've not done all the reading of the literature on Fame, and I'm never going to, so I'm just gonna throw my ideas out there for your consideration. If you have any thoughts on this, wr, write me. DM me. I'm here for you. You know, I'm gonna gather data. Why? Because I'm a professor, and Spotify has got a feature. If you're listening to this on Spotify, we're gonna put a poll up for you, and the poll's gonna ask you whether or not fame is a value. And you know what? It's anonymous, so why don't you be honest with it, and I will report back on what we hear from our Spotify listeners, no matter where you're listening. I'm very, very grateful, by the way. All right, do that poll Spotify listeners, and let us know what you think about fame.

All right, we've entered the portion of the show where I tell you to check something out, and I'm gonna do so. I I. Look, we're having a debate here in the studio, and I'm gonna love your opinions on this. Okay? I don't like doing this because, you know, I'm Susie Sunshine here, but I'm gonna say I can't honestly tell you to check out the Perfect Couple on Netflix, although every single person in the world is watching it. Eliza, you're watching it, correct?

I am.

How about you, Maddie? You watching it also? I'm not.

I was booted from the family Netflix, so I have no Netflix assets.

All right, Jorge, I'm just gonna assume you're not watching. How about your wife? She watching it? I don't think so. Okay. It's. I. All I know is that Stephanie Rule, who I is a famous newscaster and who I admire and follow on all different platforms, said, can we please talk about the Perfect Couple? And she got 1400 not likes comments. Okay, so obviously people are watching it now. My interest in watching it immediately was that it takes place in on the island. It purportedly takes place on the island of Nantucket, where I spend my summers when I'm lucky. It's written by Ellen Hildebrand, who I do not know personally, but is a good friend of friends of mine. And I wildly admire her because she has built an industry out of her writing. She has built an industry out of doing something she's incredibly good at and loves. But one of the greatest things about her from that I spy with my little eye is that she really talks to and connects with her readers. Like, she does these things out in Nantucket where women pay and they come and they spend like a weekend just talking to her. That's fantastic. And I think it's a beautiful thing. It's something I endeavor to do with becoming you in terms of, like, doing these intensives and trying to get out there and meet people who are using it and have connection. So I admire her and in every way, but. So I was dying to watch the Perfect Couple. I am not in any way beyond or in any way of watching sort of something that's light and fluffy. I love it. I mean, okay, I watch Emily in Paris. I also watch incredibly intense things and read philosophy and do. And, you know, do a lot of stuff that's really not for most people. For instance, I read a lot of recommendations by my daughter Eve, who's like a great, in my mind, great philosopher and thinker, and she's always giving me things to read that even the title would put you to sleep. But I. For John. But I would say. So I turned into the Perfect Couple with so much excitement and anticipation because, what, it had Nantucket and then it had all these fantastic actors and actresses in it, and I. I just fall asleep. Every. Every episode I fall asleep for number one. So here's my problem, okay? My number one problem. And I'm deeply offended by the fact that it's so obviously not Nantucket. I mean, there's a screenshot here and a screenshot there of saying it's Nantucket, but, like, Nantucket doesn't have hills or roads like that. So, okay, this is my personal problem. My other problem is that it's, first of all, Nicole McKidman, one of the greats. Somebody must feed her. She's very alarmingly thin and it's none of my fricking business. She's extremely beautiful and a great actress. Okay, fine, none of my business, but I'm sort of obsessed with her because I don't know how you stop time like that. I would like to know how one stops time, but I think I finally met my match with Too Light and Fluffy. But, Aliza, you're loving it. What's the story with that?

Well, I'm loving to hate it.

Okay.

I can't stop watching.

Yeah, yeah.

But it's not good. Like, I would say it's just like a bad version of, like, it's a wannabe Big Little Lies.

Yes, yes.

I feel like that was done really well.

Right, right.

But it's just so cheesy and stuff. But I can't stop watching.

Yeah, I know.

It's like one of those, like, just cliffhanger shows.

Right. I'm not like that with Emily in Paris in that. I'm like, this is so bad. But you know what? Sometimes in this world, your brain needs a break, and you, you know, like, you've just got to see something really funny. And you can't be reading everything. Like, everything can't be working you. So it's sort of escapism. But escapism sort of owes you the honor of staying awake, and I've not yet managed to do that. And in fact, last night I was watching the final episode, which I guess they reveal who did it, and I fell asleep twice. And then I watched. I did. And then I was like, I'm gonna find out who did it if it kills me. And then I went and watched the debate, so. Which was a necessary watching. So tell us your opinions on this show. I love the fact that it makes people talk. And, you know, actually, in general, I love pop culture that people can talk about and it brings us together and we can all just talk about without it becoming pollut. Politicized. And I. This is actually one of those rare things which you can talk about with anybody. So I'm all in favor of those. I can't think of anything else offhand. Sports. I guess sports are still kind of the last bastion where people could just talk about stuff. And it doesn't get bigger than just sports sometimes. Okay. Anyway, that's my. Maybe Check it out. Check it out. If you truly want escape escapism, and unlike me, you don't care if it's really Nantucket. Okay.

I mean, I just looked it up.

Yeah.

And the house that they were filming at is in Chatham.

Okay. Rest my case. Rest my case. It just doesn't look. It doesn't look. And, you know, I know why they didn't film in Nantucket. I know Nantucket's ridiculously expensive. You go to Nantucket and you get a. You get a. Like a stop into a roadside thing and get like a Diet Coke, and it's going to set you back $15. I mean, Nantucket is a little tiny island. Everything is expensive once it gets there. And you don't want to pump gas in Nantucket. Honestly, you just do not. That is like, very, very expensive. So they didn't film there because they would have bankrupt the whole operation. And I don't blame them. So it was. It was definitely not Nantucket. But I will say this. If you ever do get a chance in your life to visit the island of Nantucket, it is one of those magical places that changes you. There's something about the color of the sky. And after a couple of years of going to Nantucket, well, you never really get used to it, but I think I sort of absorbed it. And I thought, this is a magical place. And I'm there every single summer. My best friend sue, who I speak about on this podcast, frequently comes out and visits me, and we play golf. And usually the way it goes when we play golf is we play one spectacular round, and then we play one round where we should be arrested. I don't know why it is. Right. We're usually laughing so hard. The second round, we actually played in the Member Guest Club Championship at the Sankatie Golf Club, and we came in dead last, and we went around chatting. We're dead effing last. And nobody thought it was as funny as we did, but we. We did. We were wearing matching outfits, also annoyed people. And actually, I think that sue got us hats. Matching hats that said, we are the winners or something. It was awful. Anyway, we were inappropriate. And so one year, she decided to bring out her son Robert with her. And she said, can I bring him? He's never seen Nantucket. And I said, sure. So I picked her up in the red Jeep, which has, like, a classic Nantucket red Jeep with no sides, no top. And I get her at the ferry, and he jumps in the back seat, and we're driving along, chatting and catching up. It's a sight to behold when she and I are together yammering away, and we're talking for, like, 15 minutes straight. And then at one moment, I turn around to look at Robert in the backseat, and he was, like, in a silent scream with his hands thrown up and his eyes wide open, and he was like. Like he had seen, like, a ghost. Terrible cliche, but he was speechless with shock. And I almost drove the car off the road, and I said, what's wrong? And he said, what is this place? What is this place? And that's how beautiful it is. And I think that I felt that like when I went to Normandy and I saw the graves. And I remember turning to Jack saying, what is this place? I felt that way on the cliffs of Mehar in Ireland, where I thought, oh, my God, I've spent my entire life and I did not know this place existed. And I had a what is this place? Moment. And when Jack and I went to the Taj Mahal on our 10th wedding anniversary, we stood there with tears streaming down because that's a temple to love. He built that for his wife after she Died and we had a what is this place? There are places that change you and if you can get to them, go there. There, like I have. I am obsessed, along with my daughter in law, Eva. We are both obsessed with Scotland. I've been to 69 countries but I've never been to Scotland. It's on my list and I know when I get there I'm going to have a whole bunch of what is this place? Moments. I like. Follow every Scotland feed on Instagram. If you looked at it, you would think, what is this? Woman must be Scottish. But no. So I do urge you to go to what is this place? Places on your bucket list. New York is a what is this place? To me, I am always in that moment when I'm, you know, seeing the industry of New York, seeing the excitement and the intensity of it. So do that. I have that all over the world. Little what is it, Jack? I used to drive Jack out of his mind because every time we went to a cool place, I would say to him, I could live here. And he's like, we live in New York City. And I'm like ready to move to Tallahassee, Florida and things like that. So do that and enjoy that show and don't get too uptight about it not being Nantucket, but also go to Nantucket. All right, little tiny break.

All right, we have time. We have time, my friends, for one question from the community. Elisa, what do we have? Thank you, by the way, everyone who sends questions, I love them and they mean a lot to me. Go ahead, what do we got?

Today's question is, what if you don't dream of labor? I struggle to get clear on this because I just want to keep on learning on different topics and not be constantly delivering results.

Yes. I have these people come into my office all the time saying, I love your class, I just don't want to work. And so becoming you kind of lead you to a place with what you're going to do and it actually pays for your life. If you're independently wealthy or have extremely low need for money and can live very simply and just put it together to pursue your life of learning, then go for it. I mean, have that life. There are people, they're sort of, they have lives of seeking and learning and they have, they've understood that that means they're not going to have two BMWs in their garage in Greenwich and they're professional, perfectly great with that, or they are in a place where they don't need to think about money because they got Very lucky. And I would say there are. If you do have to work, there are jobs that accommodate constant learning. One of them would be teaching at a college or university level because you do constantly learn and do research and have a life of the mind. You do have to teach though. And teaching to teach well takes a lot of preparation and a lot of work. Take it from me. Okay. And you know, you spend untold hours sometimes. You know, I've spent. I know this is going to sound crazy, but it's the truth. I've spent 80 hours on a lecture just to prepare for it. So that, that three hours is as meaningful as it can be for the people who I'm being paid to teach. So I get your impulse. I mean, this is a personality trait and this reflects probably any gram of enthusiasts, but it also reflects the values of Eudaimonia, which are pleasure and well being and self, knowledge and curiosity and scope, which is this value of wanting a big, interesting, stimulating life. These are perfectly legitimate values. You just have to balance that desire with your other values around money and achievement. What you don't want to do is pursue this life, wake up at 40 and say, but I've achieved nothing and I have no money. Oops, I feel terrible. So take into account your other values as you take that one in. If that's in you, I don't think you shouldn't pursue it. I just think you should pursue it with your eyes wide open that there are trade offs involved in that kind of life.

All right, that is that for that our questions from the community. And now I'm going to try to be stumped by my team with some rapid fire questions and then we'll call it a day on this episode of becoming you. Go ahead, Aliza, what do we got? Or Maddie, we got a rapid fire question. Here goes.

I have a question for you. Since you love to work so much. If you woke up on a Monday and your calendar was unexpectedly cleared, you had no work to do at all, what would you do?

Oh my God.

And you can't do work.

Oh, come on, we're throwing your laptop away.

Oh, no.

Come on.

What are you doing?

I mean, I don't. You know, I have discovered one of the sad things about me is I don't know how to relax. It's not in me. I mean, I would make, I would. Okay, if that happened and I was in New York, the first thing I'd do is I'd go to the Met. I mean, the idea of a day where I could just go and hang out at the Met and walk around and visit my favorite paintings. Like the Met for me is like old friends. Like I have paintings I like to go and visit and stare at. And then I know my, I raised my children in the Met. Everybody has their own parenting style. My parenting style was to bring my kids to the museum and talk to them about history and sociology and relationships and family by looking at paintings. It's what I knew how to do. I wouldn't recommend it to anybody who doesn't find this enjoyable and fun and easy, but that's how I raise my kids. Like I would bring them on a Saturday to the Met. I know I'm about to reveal my true wackiness as a human being. I would bring them on a Saturday to the Met and I would say, everybody, go find a painting of the Annunciation. Go find your. Because there's roughly 70 versions of the Annunciation in the Met. And I would say go find your favorite version of the Annunciation. And then I'd set them free for an hour and then we'd, we'd all get back together again and then each one of them would show us their favorite version of the Annunciation. The Annunciation. Those of you who are not in this, the Christian faith tradition, or not familiar, weren't forced to take religion in school. The enunciation is when the angel Gabriel comes to Mary and says, guess what, you're pregnant. It's God. Okay, so. And Mary says, oh God, that's very. Freaks me out as any 14 year old girl would. And then the angel says the famous words to her, Be not afraid, for thou hast found favor with God. And then she says famously, if God wants it, I'll do it. Okay, I'm paraphrasing the Bible. I hope I'm not struck dead for that paraphrasing of it. But that's basically what happens in the Annunciation. It's basically been depicted by artists since it was written about originally. And it's been depicted by modern artists, by people who are in all sorts of. And with. It's been depicted with tenderness and it's been depicted with doubt. Okay, so then each kid would show me their favorite version and then I would talk through the emotions that I was seeing and their implications for how we live as human beings. Don't you think it was a frickin laugh ride to have me as a mother? Most mothers are like, let's go to the mall and, or have ice cream or play soccer. But no, I was forcing my children to do this kind of thing. You know what? They all lived. They all lived. And so if I had a free day, I'd go to the Met. Honestly, that's what I would do, because it's a few blocks away. And I would go revisit all of the Saturdays where my kids and I spent there with me, raising them the only way I knew how. And that's how we became a family, actually. My kids and. I mean, I was a single mother for a long time, and we did that a lot. One time, Jack came along when. When we were so lucky to have Jack come into our lives. And he became very close and helped raise my children for 20 years, practically. He came along, and I remember him saying to me, this is completely wackadoodle. And he went home. So it wasn't for everybody, and it was wackadoodle. And I bet you didn't expect that answer to that question over there, Maddie. I kind of did. Oh.

I mean, look around.

You're clearly an art lover.

Yeah, I know, I know. All right, all right, all right. I been pwned. I've been pwned. Okay. All right, Well, I think that's it for this episode of Becoming youg. I'm so happy you spent this time with us and me and my team and I cannot wait to see you next time. We have an incredibly special guest. Next time I'm going to leave it as surprise, but somebody who's very dear and special to me and who's lived an incredible becoming you life. So don't forget to tune in for that next time. I'll see you soon.