Tim Arrigo tells a man whose wife is withholding sex and affection to stop seeing it as punishment. Instead, use it as motivation to improve yourself. Become decisive and a better man, and intimacy will follow.
A gentleman just reached out to me and he said, Tim, it's driving me insane. My wife is using sex as a weapon. She's withholding love and affection from me, and I don't know what to do, man. I'm feeling powerless. I'm feeling emasculated. She holds up the proverbial carrot on the stick, and, and I don't want to feel like I got to put off this needy energy. But I try everything and it seems like it just doesn't work. And I said, your wife withholds affection and love from you, brother, because why? Think about it. That's the only thing in your life that involves her that you truly want to pursue and you truly want to modify your behavior to get. It's a result in your life The intimacy, the sex with your wife is a result that you want in your life that you're willing to modify your behavior to create. So the reality is you feel powerless, but so does your wife, because your wife realizes that that's the only thing in, in your life that she has control over to hopefully initiate you wanting to change to pursue a better version of you. So read between the lines. If you read between the lines, what can you see? That your wife is withholding sex and intimacy not as a punishment, but maybe it's a reality to motivate you to do something different. That you'll see it and you'll be incentivized to change and improve who you are. Stop living in the gray area. Stop making excuses. This isn't about kissing your wife's ass. This isn't about bending over backwards and letting people walk all over you. This is about living a life above reproach, becoming undeniable, being a gentleman, being a leader. The real question is, why haven't you realized that yet?
