Leave of Absence: Crafting Policies and Best Practices

Hello and welcome to Mastermind Mastery, the podcast for professionals who want to create and run successful peer advisory councils, or as we call them, PACs for short, or they're also known as peer groups or business mastermind groups. I'm your host, Tina Corner Stolz, founder of Elix Council, where I've been in the industry running groups since 2005 and now help those like you with education, certification, and support wanting to do the same. At one time, I ran 10 groups, nearly 100 members, and sold my groups for a good multiple and recently released my second book, Your Seat at the Table: How to Create and Run Your Own Peer Advisory Councils, published by Forbes, and grateful to you that it's an Amazon bestseller. I invite you to join each week where we share strategies and techniques to successfully launch and become a master of running your PACTs. You'll hear insights, perspectives, do's and don'ts, learn from my and my guests' mistakes, successes, and get the inside track to key takeaways. Each time we have a guest, we'll be having a bit of fun. So are you ready? Let's get going and dive into today's episode.

Hello everyone, welcome to another episode of Mastermind Mastery. I am Tina Corner Stolz, your host, and today's topic is leave of absence, right? Leave of absence. First of all, what is leave of absence? Well, we call it LOA, so leave of absence, LOA. And it's when someone asks to be away from the meetings for an extended period of time. So they want a leave of absence. Well, today we're going to talk about what to do about it. What are the pros and cons to even doing it? And how do you manage the member when they return and do so seamlessly? But what's the scenario for a leave of absence? Is it valid or not? How to discern that, et cetera. So let's start there. What is the scenario? So typically the scenario is, is that someone is not gonna be able to make the meetings for X number of months in a row, and they realize, I don't wanna pay for these meetings I'm missing, and so I want a leave of absence. And what does that mean if they pay annually? And what does it mean if they pay monthly? So we're going to talk about that. So how to discern, first of all, if it's valid or not. And you're just going to have to ask questions. I know that sounds very simple, but it is important to do instead of taking it for face value because some requests are valid and some are not. Right. And you have to decide what the policy is that you're going to do and accept when you get this question asked. And the best thing to do if you have not made that business decision is that to make the business decision now in advance of somebody asking. Because as soon as someone asks, you don't want to say, huh, well, let me think about it and get back to you. Because that's just really not acceptable because now they think you're going to address this personally and it's a personal one-on-one decision versus a business policy decision. Okay, so you're gonna ask questions. The questions— and we're going to get into that, we're going to get into some examples— but you want to be sure that first of all, whatever the reason is, is not a copy that should have been processed, right? So sometimes people will say, well, I need to leave because I just don't have time and I need to actually execute on everything I'm bringing to the meetings. And I don't have enough time to do that. I feel behind. And I feel like now come to the meetings, I should actually be spending time to actually execute on the feedback and the ideas and the solutions that I'm getting and the insights from the group. And that until I get that further along, I really can't make progress. Now, what do you hear when somebody actually says that? Well, there's all kinds of things you can hear. So first of all, one of the things that comes out for me when I hear that is, huh, so basically they're coming to the meetings and it's all about them. They have missed the other key aspect, which is their presence for the rest of the members. So if they're not there, the rest of the members miss their insights and their solutions and their feedback and their accountability and their participation, and that's not even been taken in consideration. So they are completely being self-centered on why it is they believe they need a leave of absence for a few months. Well, that should cause you pause, and it should create a conversation that you have with them. So put that part aside for a second. And what you're wanting to address when you're asking them why it is that they need that— and let's just say we stick on the time part again, and they need that time to execute and so forth. Well, why is it they're having a hard time executing? And what's that extra X number of hours, however long your meetings are, whether it's a full day or 4 hours or 2 hours or whatever it might be, Are they really going to use that time to do this thing that they're saying they need to do? So is it a time issue? Is it a managing time? And should that not be processed in the group meeting about how it is they get better? Or is it something different? Do they not know how to implement or execute? And therefore, they're feeling guilty because they're not making progress. And that's a different issue. So the point is you're gonna do a deep dive in finding out what the real issue is on why they're making the request. So the request is an end result. It's not the issue. And as the moderator, the chair, the facilitator, your role is to dive deep into what's causing them to ask this question to discern if it's legitimate. Is it financial and they just don't wanna tell you? Who knows, right? So what are some legitimate reasons? Well, legitimate is illness. Had that happen multiple times. Maybe it's cancer and they're going to be going through treatments. Maybe they have an ill parent and they're getting ready to have to go elsewhere and be remote and take care of them, etc. So illness is real. Sometimes I've seen M&A activity. They have gone through and getting ready to acquire, and maybe that CEO is not going to be in town for X number of months due to this acquisition, and maybe virtual is not an option to participate in the meetings. So it's temporary. So it's always an unplanned, unavoidable situation, personally or professionally, that is going to happen for X number of months in a row. Those to me are legitimate reasons. And when I say X number of months, what are we talking about? We're not talking about 3 months, okay? And I'm not talking about 2 months either. It's an extended period. So it could be 3 months, 4 months, something like that. And typically anything longer than that is a huge red flag. And it's a red flag because If it's longer than 3 or 4 months, then it's a pretty big deal, and that probably needs to be processed. So what could that be? Well, can you think of a reason that somebody would need to be gone for 5 or 6 months legitimately? So there are yeses to that, but there are also nos. And so we're back into finding what the real, real issue is. Because if it's longer than 3 months, it's unlikely they will return. And why is that? Well, you guys are all smart because you know they're gonna lose the connection with the group. They're gonna lose the cadence. They're gonna forget the value, and they're gonna get caught up in whatever else it is they're doing, and it's gonna be extremely hard for them to come back. There are exceptions, of course. And if somebody goes on leave of absence, we are going to talk about how it is you keep them connected to the group. So now we've talked about leave of absence, what it is, and the importance of legitimately finding out why someone feels they need a temporary reprieve. And do they really believe in their heart, in their mind, that is temporary? Or are they saying, my first step, it's temporary, but it might be permanent. Because the last thing you want to do is not have this commitment with the group that this member is going to be absent for 3 months, let's just say, or 4, and then they never return. And the group is hopeful. Because what I hate actually can happen is that you have the conversation and you say, you know, Sally's not going to be here, blah, blah, blah reasons, or Sally tells the group why, which is the more ideal scenario, by the way. The group is like, oh darn, we understand. Well, we look forward to seeing you in June. And then you know what happens is that in March they go, how's Sally doing? April, it's always, how's Sally doing? Has anybody heard from Sally? And they always are looking at you when you know what, they could call Sally and they could see how things are going, but it puts you on the spot of like how they're doing. Well, Sally coming back next month, so this June. It's hard. You want to be able to answer those questions and not be felt that you're being put on the spot to cover for Sally when in essence she may not be coming back. And now there's been an open seat at the table that you have not filled out of good faith because Sally was coming back, and that has, has, and will hurt the group. With that missing seat. And it's seeing that missing seat that causes them to always think about Sally and what's going on. And what you don't want to do is have other members think, well, I could do a leave of absence if I need to, etc. So you have to really manage this tightly with a policy because otherwise it's just a cover-up and it's a member leaving without having the guts to tell you they're leaving. And it just prolongs the pain for everybody at the table. So what do you do if it's legitimate? First of all, so you step one, make sure it's legitimate. And if you believe it is, you have a set agreement when they're returning. And I encourage you to have set guidelines. For example, You might have them send an update to the entire group once a month about how things are going, so the group stays connected with them. You will include them on all your communication that you ever have with the group. So in essence, they're still a member, they're just present in the meeting. So your, your emails about the agenda, anything, socials, your get-togethers, they're always included in that as though they're still a member because they are. That's how you keep them connected. You may, if you're doing coaching sessions, continue the coaching sessions because those don't take up a lot of time, right, for them. If they can't make the meetings, obviously, but it's a way for you to stay connected. Or maybe at a minimum, you meet them for a coffee. Or maybe it's not every month you have your session, but maybe it's every 6 weeks or something. But you find those ways to stay connected to them. How are they doing? And also sharing what's going on in the group. That's how they can stay connected. And there's all kinds of other techniques based on what it is and how you communicate with the group and the group with each other. My point is for you to take away is you keep them involved. That's very important. But you have the commitment from them that they are returning on this particular month. And a good rule of thumb is you ask them, What is it that needs to change between now and then for you to return? So what is it that you are going to be working on, doing differently, et cetera, that you return? So if they are taking care of an ill parent, what is that? Well, I need to get my parents, you know, into assisted living. I need to take care of the house. I need to do that. I'm pretty sure I can do all that in 90 days. Blah, blah, blah, and then I will be back. Okay, so now you know what it is you're going to be talking to them about when you follow up with them. How's it going? How are your parents doing in assisted living? How is it getting everything done? Maybe you can help them. You can be a resource connector and continue to show value to them while it is they're going through this tough time. And the group can show compassion with them while they're going through a tough time if that's the reason for their leave of absence. Get the group involved with them. That is very important. Assign a mentor or somebody like an accountability partner that every month checks in with them and also fills them in on what's going on with the group. It's a good way to maintain that connection. Now, a question is, do they pay while they're out of leave of absence? So what if they pay annually? What do you do? Well, that's between you and them whether you give them a discount or you extend maybe their annual 1 month or 2 before you ask for it. A kind of rule of thumb if you're on a monthly is that they pay a minimum of 25% of their monthly to hold their seat. Point is, there should be a financial still at a reduced rate commitment they have made in order to hold their seat at the table. It should not be zero. If it's zero, there is— you know this, you absolutely know this. I don't even need to say that. Then, you know, there's no, like, reminder of their commitment to the group. So charge something, right? And why even do leave of absence? Well, it allows you to keep your valuable members. Or back to when it's legitimate. So you're going to keep your valuable member. It helps keep the group cohesive. And I will tell you, when it's for the right reason, they are indebted to you and they appreciate it. It's a way to strengthen the relationship. So while you may be taking a hit financially, it is for the long run. This is abundant thinking, not scarcity, and it's for the long run. They will come back and the group will be excited to see them, but they haven't totally disappeared, and that is critical. So what are some best practices about leave of absence? Well, first of all, you want to put it in writing. We have a form as an example, and I'm going to include it in the show notes. And it's a form that they sign and it says this is exactly what they're going to commit to. So you might have them commit to again writing that update once a month and that they're going to return on this particular month to the meeting. And this is how much their, you know, fee is for going on leave of absence. And then of course, you're going to have that game plan for them to stay engaged, but that can all be in your leave of absence form. You want to put it in writing and you want to get that commitment with signatures. It makes a statement. Leave of absence can be very powerful positively, but do not let it be a crutch negatively. And if you haven't set your policy, set it now so that when it does happen, you can explain it to your group. This is your policy and this is what it means and this is what you do so they know you take it seriously and it's not willy-nilly. For people to come and go and think that they can get reduced payment for that. I hope today's episode is giving you something to think about with leave of absence as you get into your groups being full and multiple groups. This is going to happen. So until next week, you guys have a great week and unbelievable meetings if any of you have your meetings this week. We'll talk to you later. Go make it happen.

Hey, moderators of groups, thank you so much for listening to today's podcast. To get access to today's show notes and exclusive content and resources, visit TinaCornerStolz.com/podcast or LXcouncil.com, where you can also become part of an exclusive online community, attend our academy, or get free resources to templates, checklists, and more. And you can even contact me there as well. So if this episode resonated with you and you know someone who can also benefit from listening, please share with them by taking a screenshot and even posting on your social media. I also love reviews and appreciate hearing from each of you, those actually doing this wonderful work. Please tune in next week for another episode of Mastermind Mastery. And I'll close by sharing something my mentor did after every learning moment, he shared a shiny pebble from his pocket with anyone he passed knowledge to and asked them to forward that pebble—knowledge—on. So now I encourage you to go pass on a pebble—the takeaways you learned today—to either your existing groups or fellow peers. Now go make it a great one.