TJ Walker was a shy kid who learned to speak well through practice and student government. He argues speaking is a skill you can learn, not something you're born with. Pick topics you care about, start small, and your self-image shifts.
Chapters
Are you using an outdated self image of a communicator? So many people tell me, dj, I'm just not a good communicator. I'm not naturally good. I'm not a good speaker. Well, time out. You weren't a good walker when you were six months old. You hadn't learned to walk yet. Nobody is a natural born walker, nobody's a natural born speaker. But at some point you learn to walk and you learn to run. In all likelihood, you might not be an Olympic caliber sprinter or marathoner, but you can move, you can walk, and maybe you can run on the pickleball court as I do, or some other sport. You don't think of yourself as well. I'm just not somebody who can walk or run. You learned how to do it. It's exactly the same way when it comes to speaking, communicating. Whether it's one on one communication, whether it's talking up in a meeting, whether it's giving a presentation to three colleagues or to a board of directors of 20 people, or maybe even on stage talking to 500 or a thousand, or maybe like this in front of a camera, talking to theoretically the whole world. You can overcome your initial identity of a speaker. I can tell you personally, I love myself my first 11 years of life as someone shy, introverted. I was the last person to raise my hand in class. I was the worst person to have to sell magazine subscriptions for my school or bird houses to raise money for my boy Scouts. I was horrible at it. My self image was, hey, I'm sort of shy. I don't really like standing up and talking in front of people. But guess what? I changed my identity. I developed new interest and it kind of forced me to speak out more. I developed an interest in politics, in that case, student politics. When I was 12 years old and I decided I wanted to run for homeroom representative, the student government in my junior high school. This was so long ago. We didn't have middle school, it was junior high school. And that forced me out of my show. And I had to stand up and talk to 20 other students in my homeroom about why I wanted to represent them. And I won. I got a little bit of positive feedback, nice taste of this, and that developed more interest. And then a couple years later I ran for student body president of my junior high school. That allowed me opportunities to speak at student assemblies in front of 1200 people and in front of the closed circuit TV newscast. So my self identity grew. Now you may be thinking, well, I wouldn't want to do that at 30, much less 12. You don't have to be me, but I don't want to be a politician, which is what I did want to do way back when. But figure out something that interests you. Welcome to the T.J. walker Success Channel. This is the place where, where I help you become more successful by learning how to boost your communication skills, your competency and your confidence. You may think of yourself as an introvert. You may think of yourself as someone, well, I grew up in a quiet family. We all just ate dinner silently. Okay, there's nothing wrong with that. But you can become whatever you want. I don't mean you can become a professional basketball player if you're four feet tall. But when it comes to speaking and communicating by speaking you can in fact improve. You can in fact refine yourself. You can in fact develop a new self identity as a strong communicator. If nothing else, you may want to create a community forum or YouTube challenge or a YouTube channel where you talk to people about why it's okay to be an introvert, why the world needs to stop telling all introverts that they need to become extroverts. You could become a spokesperson for introverts if you wanted to. That's just a hypothetical. The point is, find something you like to talk about. Whether it's chess, whether it's basketball, whether it is medieval literature, whatever it is, find something you like to talk about where you want to share with other people. It could be work related. If you do a job and you've been there two weeks, chances are someone else may come in today. You are now two weeks ahead of them. You can show them the ropes. You can tell them, if nothing else, where the restroom is, what the policy is in the kitchen, how to use the coffee machine. That's communication. You can in fact do it. But it's going to help if you get away from this negative self identity of I'm not a communicator. If you're a human being, you are a communicator. You are someone who breathes, you're a breather, you're someone who eats, you are an eater. Doesn't make you a foodie, but you do like to eat food and you are a communicator. It is hardwired into being a human being. So forget about your upbringing or build upon the successes and focus right now on what is going to help you live the life you want, have the most happiness, have the most success on your terms. And that is likely to involve you communicating you speaking with people every single day.
