In this instructional video Tom Krieglstein addresses the challenge of "Negative Nellies"—team members whose toxic attitudes undermine morale and performance despite often being high performers. He begins by citing Harvard Business Review research (Phelps & Mitchell) and Gallup’s concept of "actively disengaged" employees, establishing that a single negative individual can trigger defensive behaviors, trust erosion, and disengagement across a team. Krieglstein illustrates the problem with a detailed case study of Devin, a real‑estate manager, and Pat, a high‑performing but chronically negative employee whose attitude caused resignations and morale decline. He then presents a three‑step leadership framework: Confront, Decide, Fix. For the Confront stage, he offers three concrete tactics: (1) frame the issue as “people vs. problem” (soft on the person, hard on the issue), (2) bring a documented “third point” (data) to keep the conversation focused, and (3) practice active listening. The Decide stage explores whether to retain or terminate the employee. Krieglstein references multiple business authorities (Energy Bus, Jeff Smart, cost‑of‑keeping estimates, Jack Welch’s rank‑and‑fire, Zappos, Jim Collins) to argue that keeping a toxic employee can be far more costly than firing, yet acknowledges that a decision should weigh potential for change against team impact. If the leader chooses to retain the employee, the Fix stage outlines a systematic approach: (a) identify the root cause using both qualitative (conversation) and quantitative (data) analysis, (b) develop a realistic, measurable, time‑bound action plan (e.g., adjusting travel load for Pat), and (c) conduct regular follow‑up check‑ins to monitor progress. The case study shows that after reducing Pat’s travel, her health and attitude improved, restoring team morale while preserving her high performance. Krieglstein concludes by reinforcing the Confront‑Decide‑Fix loop as a practical, empathy‑driven method for leaders to transform or, when necessary, remove negative influences, thereby cultivating a healthier, more productive work environment. The video ends with typical YouTube calls to action.
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Have you ever worked with someone who's like a human rain cloud or more like a thundercloud, and they are constantly casting a shadow over you and your team's spirit? I bet you have. It's a challenge we all face at some point. In fact, a study done by doctoral students William Phelps and Terence Mitchell that was published in the Harvard Business Review. They found that one single toxic team member, just one, can be a catalyst for a downward spiral in organizations. They found that this single member, this single negative member, can lead to defensive mechanism, trust deterioration, and the physical and psychological disengagement of our members, ultimately destroying the positive culture of the team in our leadership program. Dance Floor Theory we actually call these people Negative Nellies. They are the people on your dance floor who are actively trying to pull people off of your dance floor and ruin the party. So yeah, bad people are bad people. Well, duh. But they aren't always the easiest to deal with. And so in this video, I'm going to give you a step by step strategy for dealing with the Negative Nellies on your team. Let's get into it. Check out this story of a successful company that was about to crumble because of one bad apple. Devin ran a real estate management firm and his team was very close. They celebrated everything from birthdays and anniversaries together. Devin's team was so close knit they probably even knew each other's dental records. But lurking beneath this Brady Bunch exterior, Devin was actually running a team that was about to rock from the inside out. All because of one team member. Four years ago, Devin hired Pat to reflect friendly recommendation against his normal hiring protocol to match applicants with the company values. He hired Pat quickly without going through the thorough vetting process that he normally does. During Pat's first year, she hit all the metrics, which pleased Devin of course, but on the sidelines, however, a few of his other team members had commented on her negative attitude during meetings and team outings. During Pat's second year, she continued to reach her metrics successfully, but comments about her negative attitude continued to be reported to Devin. During Pat's third year, a fellow team member submitted his resignation to Devin. He cited Pat as part of the reason he was leaving. Another team member brought up the topic with Devin. He said that despite everyone else on the team feeling so connected and well bonded, people couldn't stand Pat's negative attitude and it was actually hurting the morale of the entire team. Devin realizes that something needed to get done and done quickly or else Devin was about to lose everyone. Devin was Torn because Pat consistently performed well. But Devin didn't want to lose all the other members on his team who were very talented but also fit the company culture. Despite Pat's high performance ability, she was clearly a negative Nelly. Negative Nellies like Pat can be high performers within their role, but their negative attitudes cause damage to the rest of the team. A negative Nelly is often someone that doesn't align with the values of the company. In fact, Gallup Research uses the term actively disengaged to describe negative Nellies. Those researchers I mentioned before, Phelps and Mitchell, they defined the people as those who don't do their fair share of work, who are chronically unhappy or emotionally unstable in the workplace, or bully and attack others. So what can be done? Well, the first step is we have to confront them. Okay, don't fight them, but we have to confront them. Unfortunately, supervisors are notoriously bad at confronting and dealing with difficult people. Paul Gustavan describes this concept in his book A Team of Leaders that he says, dealing with difficult people is something that most supervisors are usually not comfortable with. I understand that, but the first step in mitigating the negative effects of a negative Nelly is we have to confront them. Confronting a negative Nelly is like telling your friend that they have bad breath. You have bad breath caused by gingivitis. It's not easy, but. But you gotta do it for their good and for your good. Hey, Johnny, listen, buddy, we gotta talk. That breath of yours is just toxic. Johnny, seriously, cut the bad breath. Here's a mint. The goal of confrontational meeting is to gauge how aware the negative Nelly is of their behavior and then decide on what action plan you're gonna do. Here are three tips to help you to better confront the negative Nellies in your world. Number one, people versus problem. Not person versus person. Make the situation about you and them against the problem instead of you against them. As Henry Cloud said in his famous book Integrity, he said, be hard on the issue, soft on the person. By focusing on the issue instead of the person, you're now on the same team solving the same situation together. Tip number two, use a third point, having documentation of the issue and use that data as a third point reference, like a piece of paper on the table. And during the confrontational meeting, having this third point will amplify the feelings that of you and them against that problem, AKA what's on the piece of paper. It also allows all that negative energy to be directed to that piece of paper instead of towards the two of you. You are so smart. Listen, Johnny, I mean it shows here. You, you, you. You have bad breath six out of seven days of the week. You got to fix this buddy. Like it says it right here. Number three actually listen. Actually listen. During a confrontation, that's as rare as a teenager without a phone, most people just nod and pretend until it's their turn to talk. Uh huh. Uh huh. Yep. Mm. Yeah, I agree. Mm yeah, yeah. Wait, what were we talking about? Are you a magician? So much conflict happens because neither side is actually listening to the other. Ask questions and listen to what they are actually saying. Don't try and think about what you are going to say next while they're talking. Just listen. That way, even if you agree to disagree, both sides can at least say at least I felt heard. Often people just want to feel heard. Ralph Ellerson once said. I could have saved myself a lot of wear and tear with people if I had just learned to understand them. Now that you've confronted this negative Nelly, it's time to move on to the next step, which is to decide if you are going to fire them, you are fired or keep them. Many business strategy books like the Energy Bus, it's a famous strategy book says talk about the goal of having the right people on the bus in the right seat at the right time. After confronting a negative Nelly, you have to make the decision to either keep this person or fire them. If you choose to fire them, do it quickly and move on. You are so fired. A CEO once told me during a strategy session they said, I've never regretted firing someone, but many times I've regretted keeping someone too long. Resonates with some of you. I know it. Hiring expert Jeff Smart talks about the idea that A players want to hang out with A players, B and C players want to hang out with A players, but A players do not want to hang out with B and C players. A players will often leave a company if the leadership doesn't fire those B and C players. In case you are still on the fence about firing A negative Nelly, one more co founder of 1-800-GOT Junk, Cameron Herald he says that the cost of keeping a bad employee can be as high as 15 times their salary. This is due to issues with current employees, company systems and failed clients. Okay, I lied. I have one more. Jack Welch, former CEO of General Electric, was famous for firing the bottom 10% of his employees every year and replacing them with new people. Okay, lied. I have one more and I swear this is the last one. Starting to get suspicious and in his book Delivering Happiness, the late toshe of The CEO of Zappos. He talks about a time when he fired several underperforming employees, but by doing so, he found that the remaining team elevated their engagement and output. Convinced yet? I lied. One more. You tricked me. You tricked me. This, I swear, is it. In Jim Collins famous business book, Joe the Great, he said that if you have the wrong people, it doesn't matter if you have the right direction. Okay, I'm done. No more. Let's say though, that after this conversation with them, you've decided you aren't going to fire them. I'm not firing you. If that's the case, then we get to move on to step number three, which is to fix them. Yes. If only fixing workplace issues were as easy as updating your software. Oh, Pat, it's just a bug. Let's download the less cranky patch and fix you right up. Unfortunately, there's still work involved. Here are three steps involved with fixing the problem. Number one, identify the real issue. When Devin confronted Pat about that issue, he discovered that the amount of travel that Pat was doing for her work was actually weighing so heavily on her that it was causing her to have health issues. That was spilling over into everything in her life and she was bringing all of that negative energy to work. Pat actually loved the company, but the particular role she was in was just wearing her down. The best way to identify the real issue is to do both qualitative and quantitative. Or as I like to call it, plain Sherlock Holmes with a calculator, here I come. Hey, Watson. I see that we have an issue here. Two plus two does not equal five. Great accent, Tom. Great accent. Qualitative means to talk with people and hear their side of the story. Quantitative means looking at the data, the numbers, and seeing what the data says. It's crucial to find out the root cause of the negative behavior through this analysis. In Pat's case, excessive travel was impacting her health and her mood. The key is to have an open, honest conversation to unearth the underlying issues of what's going on. Remember, sometimes the problem might not be work related, but it is personal. As the leader, be empathetic and and focus on finding solutions that benefit both the employee and the team. Okay, now that we've identified the real issue, in this case with Pat, it's her travel, we can move on to the second step of fixing the problem, which is to create an action plan. Once the core issue has been identified, it's time to devise a plan. This could involve role adjustments, additional support, or even personnel development opportunities. In Pat's case, it meant reducing the travel and adjusting her position in a way that she still could have high output but not travel as much. When you're creating this plan, ensure it's realistic, measurable and time bound. Set expectations and milestones to evaluate that progress over time. Over the next three months, Devin worked with Pat to change her position to involve less travel. And lastly, the final step to fix it is to follow up and check in with regular check ins are crucial for monitoring the progress and making those necessary adjustments. These sessions, these check ins provide an opportunity for feedback and reaffirmation of commitment from both sides. Devin and Pat. They checked in monthly to track Pat's progress. And in the end, Pat continued to be a high performer. But because her travel change, thus her health got better and her attitude lifted up, the rest of the team started to notice it and enjoyed actually being around her. So there you have it. Confront, decide and fix. It's kind of like a weird corporate version of Stop, drop and roll. All right everyone, this is security officer in place. Here we go. Ready, Confront, decide, fix, Go, go, go. When dealing with negative Nellies, it's about understanding, supporting and guiding them through confidence. Positive change. However, it's also about being realistic. Because sometimes, despite all your best efforts, the negative behavior persists and the person continues to be a rotten core in your group. It may be time to part ways for the betterment of the team and the organization. Remember, these are the steps. Number one, confront with empathy and clarity. Number two, decide whether to fire or keep based on their potential for change and the impact on the team. And number three. Well, that's for number three. Fix the issue by identifying the root cause, creating an action plan and following up regularly. Your role as a leader is not just to manage, but to transform your team into a positive, productive force. And by tackling the issues of the negative nelly head on, you're not just solving the problem, you're cultivating a healthier, more positive work environment. Remember, a single change can ripple through your entire team, elevating the performance and the morale of everyone. If you like this video, I encourage you to hit that subscribe button, that like button and leave me a comment down below and check out all of our videos. In fact, my name's Tom. I'm here to help you to engage people on your dance floor. I'll see you in the next video.
