Can you lose weight on your own?

One of the most overlooked aspects of the health and weight loss game is the fact that quite often it can actually be quite a lonely thing to do. Now, it's not necessarily our goal or target to be like a lone wolf and, and try to do it alone necessarily, but quite often we can end up feeling quite alone and isolated because often we're the only one trying to achieve this thing, and often the people that we live with and that are around us are just continuing with their life. Because like anything in life, not everybody is ready for change or transformation at the same point. We all reach that point where we're like, you know what, enough's enough, I'm fucking doing this now. We all reach that at different points in life with different things going on and so on and so on. So the catch is often we end up doing it alone, which can often make it harder for us to stay on track because most of us feel like we've got way too many things to focus on and to do anyway, and now we're trying to cram in this new weight loss regime or fat loss regime, and as a result, it can often become quite overwhelming. So now we're overwhelmed with all the different things that we've got to do, plus the fact that we're isolated and alone doing it. You know, sometimes people are a little bit supportive and they'll be like, oh yeah, no, you're doing great, carry on. But quite often that's not necessarily enough to compensate for how we actually feel when we feel like we're, we're stuck alone trying to do this thing. So one of the key things that you can do if you have a partner is try to get them involved. Now, when I say try to get them involved, they don't actually have to be on their weight loss journey as well. Like, maybe they don't even need to lose weight. But the catch for many of us is we don't have enough support in the home that gives us the mind space and the freedom to tackle our health and body challenges without feeling guilty, like we're, we're over-focusing on ourselves and taking more time away from them, or we feel like we're just burdening them with another obligation that they've now got to sort out. Make sure my food is ready on time and, and that it's in specific portion sizes and all this and that. So sometimes we feel like we're burdening others or taking away from others and so on because we're now focusing on ourselves. But what we can do, of course, is be willing to sit and have those conversations and try and get our partner on board to support us in the process. Now, there are various ways to do it, but one of the key ways that we want to do it is with food. Food is one of the, the biggest aspects of this weight loss game, which I'm sure you're all aware of. But if the food is not on point, it doesn't matter how much we train, our results will be limited. It doesn't matter how much we sleep and get good recovery, If we're not eating right, our results will always be limited. So if we can at least get our partner on board and to help support us with that, that's a massive, massive win straight away. So for myself, for example, if I now go into a specific period where I'm training for a particular outcome— oh, I'm trying to burn fat, or I'm trying to increase my, my strength so that I can lift more weight on the bar, and so on— That requires me to eat different to whatever I'm doing at maintenance. Now, what I do, rather than kind of go, oh right, well, you now need to cook in this particular way and so on, or, or whatever with my partner— instead, I allow her to carry on doing what she's going to do and cook the meals that she would be cooking, but I make her aware of what my goals are, and then I put in the effort to tweak and adapt my meals so that they serve the particular outcome that I want. So this way nothing really changes for her. She's happy to shift and change odd things that she needs to, but rather than it simply become her burden, the responsibility ultimately remains with me. So for example, she might cook and prepare the meal, but I will portion it out and I'll go, right, I need this much protein on my plate, this many veg and this many carbs, or whatever the thing might be depending on my goal. but by doing so, we kind of act as a team. She's not put out by now having to serve up 3 different meals, one for her, one for the babe, and one for me. So instead, it's the same meal for me. I just portion it out so that it's specific or relevant to the outcome that I want. Now, of course, the other option is if your partner is willing to do it, you can ask them to do the meal for you specifically. You might be like, all right, well, I know you're having that particular meal. Maybe she's having spaghetti bolognese for dinner, but that's not in alignment with whatever outcome you want. So you want steak and veg, for example. Now we could, and often they may be willing to cook two separate meals, and that's absolutely fine if you can, if your partner is willing to do that, and mine is willing to do that. But generally speaking, because obviously I know what I'm doing with food, I don't need her to do that. Instead, I can just tweak whatever I've got in order to make it applicable to the goal or outcome that I have. but not everybody has that luxury because they're maybe not quite as advanced or as experienced with food and what causes what to happen in the body and so on. So instead, what we do is go, okay, well, you cook your thing, I will manage the meal. Or it's a case of, okay, well, I know you would normally be cooking this for you, but would you mind cooking this for me? And 9 times out of 10, when we're actually willing to be open in communication with our partners and so on, they will be more than happy to help support us in this journey. Now, of course, we might have to help them a little bit along the way, to— so it's not just a complete burden or offloading of the responsibility on them. Because one of the things we never want to do, particularly as a man, is outsource responsibility. Because the catch-22 when we do that is if she's taking care of your meals, your partner's cooking all your meals, but you're not getting results, that puts you in a position to blame her. Oh well, you know, the meals that you're doing, they're good, but they're not good enough. Like, whatever it is, something about the meals, the way you're cooking them, preparing them, serving them, is not actually helping me get to my weight loss goals. So we don't want to outsource the responsibility. We can outsource the task, but the result that you're after ultimately comes down to you. So yes, your partner can help you. And of course, you can play this game as a team sport. And obviously you communicate with each other week to week. Is this working? Is it helping me move in the right, right direction? What do we need to tweak or change moving forward to make sure I maintain results? Or to accelerate my results further. So often when we do this, when we get somebody else involved that's willing to kind of play the game with us, it makes it much easier for us to stay accountable for a start, and it takes a lot of the psychological and emotional burden out of it where we just feel like we're overwhelmed with too many things to think about and too many things to do. Now, the one other strategy that I would recommend, and it's not for everybody, but that I would recommend for people to maintain accountability and so on, is to have a training partner. Now, this only works if your training partner is someone that will actually train with you and not talk with you. So this doesn't mean you can't speak, but often what happens is you end up in the gym together and then you spend 30 out of the 60 minutes chatting, you know, and you'll do a set and then there's 3 minutes of talking before the next set and so on. That sort of shit you've got to avoid. And not because chatting isn't valuable, but it's not going to get you to the result. So you save the chat for before and after, and during the workout you're there to hold each other to, to, um, to what it is you're there for. You know, you make sure that you're both sticking to your short or, um, your specific rest periods, sticking to tempos if that's part of your program, making sure you're pushing enough weight or doing enough work to actually stimulate the body to make change, rather than just being there as another chat buddy, because otherwise you might as well be sitting there like most people do, just scrolling social media rather than actually getting on with the workout. So those are some of the— what I found to be the most effective strategies for making sure that, one, you show up for yourself, but also that you're doing and taking the right actions to get results. So first off, we've got try to get your partner involved if you can. Let them know where you're at, what you're struggling with, and find out where they would or would not help you. And if it's a food thing, it might be a case of you allow them to cook as they normally would and you portion up your meals so it's specific to the goal that you want, or your partner may actually be willing to cook you separate meals if needed to help you get to your goals. So that's one way we can do it. And then the other thing that you would want to do is ideally have a training partner. It's not essential if you're very good at holding yourself to to account and keeping yourself disciplined in the gym. But most people find that with a training partner, they will actually push themselves harder, because whether we like to admit that we compete or not, there's always that slight bit of underlying competition that helps push you a little bit further. Plus, the support of having someone there kind of spurring you on and, and cheering you up a little bit often helps as well. So that's what I'll leave you guys with. As always, if you have any questions, drop them in the comments below, and if not, I look forward to chatting with you all in my next video. Take it easy, people.