Clarissa Chiaese explains how guilt and selfishness trap you in others' scripts within Reality Transurfing. She introduces frailing, a technique to help others while protecting your own intentions, and argues that giving should go to your mirror, not to people expecting reciprocity. Making the call means choosing your path decisively, even if it means cutting ties.
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The other party oftentimes wants you to adhere to their script. Hello, Transurfer! And welcome to Transurfing TV and my video on selfishness and guilt, ideas that are very prevalent and invasive! To our own goals and intentions, and tools used by pendulums and others in our lives to keep us adhering to a script that maybe isn't the one intended for us. So, I am going to break it down and give you all of my thoughts on how to guard yourself, how to stay in tune with your Soul Fraile and your Lifeline and your script, script while managing the pendulums in your reality, Transurfing style. But before I do that, I am going to announce the winners for my reprogramming sticker contest. I know I said I was going to give 3 away, 3 stacks, or 3 winners would get these stacks of stickers, but I'm actually gonna, I'm gonna name 10 people now because I got a truckload of these stickers and they are awesome and I want to just blast them out into the world. So if you would like to, join this giveaway, like this video and comment in the comment section below, "I love Reality Transurfing!" And next week, I am going to draw another 10! So, for now, these are the people that won! Ricky Swindle, David Knoblock, I hope I said that right! NotWillFarrell, Joy, Christina Simo, Crystal Taylor, Bex, Carrie Rodriguez, Jeremy Johnson, and Tommy Rapp. So, if you guys see this video, message me on Messenger through the International Transurfing Institute Facebook group and give me your address, and I'm gonna send you a nice stack of these! You can start reprogramming your minds to the Transurfing! Frequency. So with that, I'm going to get into my discussion. So selfishness, why does selfishness exist? Or the idea, right? The idea that others put in our direction that we're selfish if we're thinking of ourselves and our intentions or desires or anything that has to do with what we want. So remember the concept of pendulums. This is a huge one. And the Script. Okay? So, everyone wants others to— for the most part, I know this is generalized, but for the most part, especially in romantic relationships, in family dynamics, parent-child dynamic, employers— this is a big one— the other party oftentimes— wants you to adhere to their script. In turn, in fairness, you probably want others to adhere to your script too. And chances are, if somebody's used guilt to manipulate you by telling you you're selfish, if you are going after your own thing and not necessarily taking others into consideration, you probably have done it too. So this is a tool that is used in both directions in any relationship. Where there are negotiations typically going on. So, what can we do to safeguard ourselves from people trying to project guilt into our direction when we have set an intention that does not include the intentions of others? First, I wanna state that when you set an intention, right? Usually, this is— especially if you're gonna come up against another person, this is two people both meeting over a similar subject with their inner intention. Okay? So, if you want to make your time as easy as possible on your way to your goal— You shouldn't go to the other person that's part of the equation matching their inner intention. So, they're gonna want to keep you going in the direction of their intention or their Script, and then you obviously have your own ideas. But don't come together over the same subject in the same manner that they are, because this is how arguments ensue. This is how arguments happen, this is how rifts occur, this is how breakups happen, people get fired, all of that stuff. So, what you're going to want to do is try to come to the scenario with Frailing, okay? This is you taking into consideration what this other person may need in order to help you achieve what your intentions are! So, however that looks for you, there are lots and lots and lots of different scenarios! Or different ways that can play out. But it's really about switching your perspective around from thinking about what it is that you want to achieve and thinking about what the other person may want in order for them to assist you in achieving what you want to achieve. So quickly, I want to talk about giving because giving— there's a lot of, um, ambiguity about giving, right? Lots of people say, oh, I was giving in my past relationship and people just took and took and took, you know? So, uh, this is the opposite of selfishness, right? This is you always putting someone else in front of you. And Transurfing is actually a really fascinating modality because on one hand we are taught with this amazing knowledge that the act of giving is wildly effective in helping us achieve what it is we want to achieve via us giving that exact thing towards our mirror and then our mirror responding back to us with what it is that we are looking to achieve or what we want, our intentions. But at the same time, it's telling us to not get caught up in the pendulums and the intentions of others. And when you set a path to your goal, you don't let other people screw you up on the way to your goal. So how do you reconcile these two? How are these two reconciled? Well, first of all, never ever, ever expect the other person to respond with like by you giving to them. You giving is simply an action of you giving to your mirror. Now, that may come in, that may come in the way of you giving to another person, but don't ever give to another person expecting them to give you the same in return. This is building up excess potential. This is, uh, you inviting in balancing forces. This is you manipulating. So this is kind of in its own regard, a form of selfishness that is just as invasive as you just being selfish, right? You are doing something, taking some sort of action where you are expecting a result in turn, which obviously is not the right way to go. You want to give, with the intention that your mirror will ultimately respond, but not that specific person. So, one other thing that I wanna speak of quickly is making the call. This is a real big challenge for a lot of people, especially people that have been programmed with the whole selfishness and guilt thing, as I have, right? Stepping on people's toes professionally, um, making a stance within a relationship, especially a romantic relationship or a relationship with your parent. So this is really a valuable part of Transurfing, is deciding your vector, right? Deciding your path and then setting the intention that you are not going to let others veer— get you away, veer you away from your vector, your flow, your script. And just being systematic about stepping over the intention of others. And I know this sounds a little bit harsh, but this is where a lot of people get really, really screwed up in going towards their goals. And setting their intention is they really take into consideration too much the intentions of other people. And really, what it boils down to— and I know this sounds cutthroat— is it's either them or it's you! Oftentimes, agreements can't be made, right? Sometimes they can! Remember the person coming with inner intention and you coming with frailing. But if that doesn't work and there is no way for you to, um, to, to, to you, you to agree to the other person's script, then you are simply going to have to make the call to stick to your own and whatever you need to do, be okay with that, right? It might be a choice of either it's them or it's you. Stay in tune with your soul, Frail. Forget about what other people are expecting of you or want you to do. This is your life. This is your reality. And it's really hard to people-please and create your own reality at the same time. So again, please like this video if you do in fact like it. I'm going to be sending out literally thousands of these stickers over the next few weeks, and they are amazing! And I hope everyone that got their name called messages me, I need your addresses so I can send these off! And thank you so much for watching my video, everyone! Bye!
