In this solo talk, Renee Garcia explores the emotional and practical costs of ignoring one’s higher self or inner voice. She introduces her "Alternatives Flow Model," a visual metaphor of a river with rocks representing life options. Holding tightly to a rock (clutching onto a familiar but limiting situation) creates fear, anxiety, and a sense of stagnation, which she links to mid‑life crises, FOMO, and chronic dissatisfaction. Letting go—detaching from the rock and flowing with the alternatives space—doesn’t guarantee an easy path, but the challenges that arise are less painful than remaining stuck. Garcia discusses how fear, the "I want, I fear, I can’t let go" trap, and resonating with lower‑self narratives amplify suffering. She offers practical advice: internal detachment through Transurfing techniques, activating an inner observer, and cautious, incremental change rather than impulsive, massive leaps. The talk ends with a call for viewers to reflect on their current "rock," consider small internal shifts, and, if ready, proceed carefully with larger life changes.
Chapters
Hello, Transurfer and the Transurfing curious! My name is Renee Garcia, and today, the pain of not listening! This is more about the pain of not listening to your higher voice, your higher calling, your higher self, the voice that— urging you to go in a direction that might be a little bit scary, because obviously, jumping into the unknown can be a little bit— you know, it's not for the faint of heart. And I get questions a lot from people that have been in things long-term, like long-term marriages that aren't working any longer or have never worked, long-term careers that people have fallen out of love with, people that want to leave the country they live in or the city they live in and move, they don't know how to do it. They don't— they're fearful of jumping, all that kinda stuff. So, I'm actually gonna talk today about the pain that occurs from not making a move. Before I get started, remember to like this video and comment below "My world is taking care of me" to enter my daily giveaway. Sorry, guys. I should've been a little more prepared here. For my reprogramming stickers! Comment below "My world is taking care of me." And I'm gonna have Tufti reprogramming stickers coming out soon. Soon! So, stay tuned for those! So, before I get started, I wanna tell you something super funny! I was just getting ready to walk in here, and I had to go into another room in my house to grab something, and my boyfriend looked at me and was shaking his head and kinda laughing. And I said, "What?" And he says, "Is that what you're wearing?" And I said, "I wear this all the time on my videos! These are my video outfits!" And he was like, "Oh my God!" And I said, "They like 'em!" So, I don't know if you guys like it. I like it! And it's easy! I have a stack of my clothes and I just throw the same thing on over and over and over! Super easy, right? Okay, let's get down to business! So, the pain of not listening. I'm gonna actually use my Alternatives Flow Model, and I will explain it more in a moment for those of you that have missed— the video where I do the whole river and clutching onto the rocks routine and that whole thing. But I'm going to use this model to represent, um, not letting go versus letting go and what happens in each different scenario, right? Because, um, here's the thing, when you let go, things are not they're not guaranteed, right? Nothing's guaranteed in life. You could think something's the greatest thing in the world and maybe be fearful of taking that leap, and then take the leap and you just encounter failure after failure after failure, and obstacle after obstacle after obstacle. You never know, right? So, this is usually— what holds people back from taking a leap, right? And watch my video Quantum Leap if you have not seen that one already. And this is exactly what I'm talking about, doing something big, declaring to yourself and your reality, enough! I'm going to make a big change, I'm going to leave this toxic relationship, I'm going to leave this 9 to 5 and embark on— "my entrepreneurial journey that I've always dreamed of. I'm going to sell my house that I don't want to own anymore and go travel the world. I'm going to do something big," right? Make that quantum leap and throw yourself into the Alternative Space and whatever that may bring to you. So, again, for the model that I'm gonna use as my visual representation— The alternatives space, what I like to— how I like to visually sort of set it up in my mind to where I understand if I'm either in this mode or in this mode. So, your flow, your alternatives flow, right? These are the variations of reality and life tracks and events, and all the stuff that's either available to you immediately, or expanded out a little bit is maybe a little bit— it's accessible, but you have to make some changes in order to access that stuff. So, we have two modes in which we operate in our own individual alternatives flow, right? There's the mode of you letting go and flowing. This is you— not clutching onto one of the rocks that are in the river. So the rocks signify different lifelines, different opportunities, different events, different things that are again accessible to you. So what happens is we get caught up, we're going down the river and then we clutch onto a rock, we hold on for dear life, we load that rock up with importance and excess potential and all kinds of stuff that convinces us that it's not a good idea if we let go of that rock. Now, it's not letting go of that rock that is, you know, the whole point of this lesson, the pain of not listening. Because when you're holding on to that rock and you are not in fact satisfied with what it is that you have, your higher self knows that, either very, very obviously, This is manifested as you waking up and feeling dread, you waking up and feeling depressed, you having anxiety, you feeling as though, "Wait a second, what's happened to my life?" Right? So, this is you clutching on. And Vadim Zeland says it very well in the book. This is "I want, I fear, I can't let go." This is the worst place to be in, right? I want something, I fear— that I won't do it the right way, or it's not for me, or I don't know the way, or something, something, something, and I can't let go. This is exactly 'I want, I fear, I can't let go.' Now, if you can let go, and I say it here, detaching from what no longer serves you or your higher good, right? Connecting with the alternative space and accepting accepting freedom and growth and all of the lessons that are gonna come to you in this sort of scenario. Now, again, getting back to what I was originally saying, just because you let go of the rock doesn't mean that you're not gonna encounter problems or challenges or setbacks or moments where you're like, "Oh my God, this is more than I expected!" especially if it's a big thing like ending a big relationship, or starting your own business, or giving up that 9-to-5. So, this is going to cost something, right? Cost something is not really the right way of saying it. This comes with its own set of challenges. But what I'm trying to say is the challenges that you will encounter embarking on a new adventure, going into the unknown, all that stuff— those challenges are going to hurt a lot less than you giving in to your lower nature, your lower self, and not letting go of the rock and connecting with your higher self, right? So, here, I'm going to go over quickly the things that happen when you— clutch onto this rock with importance. Okay. This is again, the pain of not listening. This, in my opinion, is what happens in a midlife crisis. And I know I've brought this up a couple of times in past videos, but the demographic for those of you that are watching, and a lot of people finding Transurfing, is like 35 to 55, right? So we're right in that sort of zone where the midlife crisis can happen. Now, in my opinion, what the midlife crisis is, is it's you clutching onto this rock, it's you clutching onto the rock with your mind, your inner intention, not listening to the voice of your heart, right? And then finally, at a certain point, you're like— your heart is sort of fed up. "I've had enough! Please, listen to me just one last— can I just say one last thing?" Right? So, that heart trying to say one last thing— before you either stuff it down again or listen and make a change, this is, in my opinion, a midlife crisis. So, this is not connecting to your higher self, your higher action, higher people, and higher life tracks. And how this plays into the pain of not listening, where the pain of this comes from, is that your higher self knows— that there is higher action waiting for you, there are higher people, there are higher life tracks, there's an abundance of higher everything, and your lower self is remaining behind the helm, right? Steering the ship. And your higher self— your lower self is doing that, rather. And your higher self is saying, "Something's not right. Something's not right. Something's not right. Something's not right." And that something's not right is what creates pain. It's FOMO, right? Fear of missing out. I did this a lot in my past where I was like, "Why does everybody else seem to be okay with their lives? And why does everybody else seem to have a partner that they really get along with? And why—" You know, and I was constantly in this place that I was in fear of missing out, and I knew that I needed to do certain things. But I was not listening, and there was pain associated with that, right? So, it's also you maintaining resonating with fear. So, this is you clutching on to the rock, fearful. Remember, "I want, I fear, I can't let go." Resonating with fear creates more fear exponentially in your layer of reality. So, it just kinda keeps you in that place where you're stuck, stuck, stuck, stuck. Stuck, stuck, stuck. For those of us that are a little bit older, watching time pass us by, right? Watching time pass us by. The person that inspired me to give this lesson said that they were looking to get out of a very, very long-term marriage. And I know a lot of people that this has happened to, where they sort of find Transurfing later in life, they wake up and they go, "Oh my God! I need to make some changes, but I don't know what to do!" "Right? So, this is— and so much time has passed, and I'm older now." It's never too late! You have more lessons and information and tools now than you ever have. Don't let time enter into the equation of you letting go or not. However, if you do not let go, you're going to continue to just see those years tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, and that equals pain as well, right? Knowing that your life— is passing you by, knowing that there's this flow and you're not giving in to it, knowing that you're clutching on to the rock and you're too fearful of letting go. So, I'll say this to close it off, check yourself before you wreck yourself! This is you wrecking yourself, right? This is you absolutely wrecking yourself, because you're cutting yourself off at the knees, you're self-sabotaging, you're— staying in your little box of limiting beliefs, you're not letting go. Now, I want to just say to those of you that have watched to the end here, don't just go out and make a big huge decision today after watching this video. And even in, you know, just like— you can, whatever rock you are clutching onto, you can reframe this scenario so you are not doing this, right? You don't have to let go of the rock. In order to free yourself. You can free yourself internally if you want to. You can activate your inner observer, write yourself out, practice Transurfing more and more and more, start to detach yourself from whatever it is that's causing you pain in a Transurfing way, and stay engaged with what your life consists of without having to blow the whole thing up. Now, if you're interested in blowing the whole thing up, Proceed with caution. Again, you're not gonna just blast into the Alternatives Flow and everything's gonna be hunky-dory from then, right? It doesn't work like that. And this also poses its own challenges, again. But there's a lot more to gain in doing this. There's also a lot more risk, a lot more variables, a lot more unknown. But there's a lot more to gain than doing this. And just understand that if you are encountering pain of you not listening to your higher self, then maybe it is time to consider doing this, and not just staying stuck and in a place where you just never make a move, right? So, let me know your thoughts on this one, everybody! Remember to like this video, comment below! And subscribe! And let me know, are you here? Are you here? Are you somewhere in between? Let us know what your stage is, or how you can make some changes if you need to! And thanks so much for watching my video! Have a good one, guys! Bye!
