How to Stop Self Sabotage With Reality Transurfing

If you become fearless of hearing "no," your possibilities open up to you exponentially, and it is absolutely amazing! Hello, hello, hello, Transurfer and the Transurfing curious! My name is Renee Garcia, guys, and this is Transurfing TV! And today on Transurfing TV, I'm gonna be talking about something that we've all done, and in my opinion, from what I see in the Transurfing community, what a lot of people are still doing. Because the Alternative Space is vast, and subconsciously, We are fearful of the unknown, so we choose the alternative to venturing into the Alternative Space, which is remaining in the box of comfort, right? The unknown, there's a lot of risk, there's a lot of variations and destinations unknown. And for some of us— and I know that I was definitely guilty of this in the past. For some of us, those fears and anxieties about what we can't see oftentimes outweigh the comfort of remaining in the box, right? So, we choose to remain in the box. And when we come out of the box just a little bit, for a moment, sort of peek our head out and take a look around. This could be you maybe in the initial stages of a healthy relationship, or being offered a job opportunity that you feel is a little bit out of your comfort zone, right? Or some other change or movement or opportunity in your life that you have to come out of yourself. Right? So, when you're challenged and you have to come out of yourself to meet something, Outer Intention bringing you a new variation, oftentimes what happens is we peek our head out of that box of comfort and we become frightened, and we do something to put ourselves back in the box. This is self-sabotage. So, I'm gonna break it down for you. What's in the box, what's out of the box, what keeps us in the box, and what our solutions are to coming out of the box. It's actually a lot more easy and simplistic than we are led to believe. You know, self-development, achieving greater heights, coming out of ourselves, stepping into a life where there is more of— what it is we want, what it is we intend to have, right? Before I get started on all this, remember to like, comment, subscribe, all that stuff. Reality 2.0 and Tufti 2.0, link below, check it out. Join us on the Facebook group, International Transurfing Institute Facebook group. And follow me on Instagram @reality_transurfing. So, cool! I used to actually do this quite a bit. With my romantic relationships, I was like really bad at relationships for a long time. And anytime that a nice fellow would approach me and we would start dating and started to look like it was a healthy scenario, I would act out and do something really shitty. Shady or bad, because I felt as though I would have to do something to blow the situation up, because I didn't know if I could bring a better version of myself. It scared me, right? Now, obviously, these insights were gained retrospectively. I wasn't able to do it within the moment. I mean, that would've been an incredible skill to have, to know— "I was doing it in the moment." But right now, you're watching this video, right? And you're gaining this knowledge, and we're talking about this. So, you actually do have an opportunity to address where you may possibly be self-sabotaging your growth, your development, your trajectory towards something higher and better. So, maybe you're doing this with your relationship as well. Maybe you're doing this professionally. Maybe you've been offered something and you don't wanna take it because you don't feel as though you're good enough, or you can rise to the occasion. Or again, you're just scared of the unknown, or you don't know how to do something. I mean, for the longest time, I was extremely intimidated to do these videos. And I was sabotaging myself when I would get in front of the camera. I would do a bunch of negative thinking, and I would say, "It's not for me," and I would make all these excuses. And people would request videos, and I'd say, "I'm sorry, I just can't do it. I've tried!" And again, this is me sticking my head outside of my box of comfort, and then looking around, getting scared real quick, and then going back inside. And finally, at a certain point, I was like, "You know what?" you're gonna come up out of that box, and you're not going to allow yourself to do something to put yourself back inside. So, as I say with a lot of stuff, awareness is the biggest and best step that you can take in the direction of something more, from the get, right? So, if we're talking about this now, we're calling it out, you're thinking to yourself, ways that you may be self-sabotaging without even necessarily knowing it, becoming aware to that stuff is huge! You've just opened up a massive door in your reality. And if you choose, you can step through that door. Now, you can close that door as well, or put your head back inside of your box of comfort. But now it's a choice. Right? Now you know you have more than one option. You can come out, or you can stay in. So, let's start with the box of comfort. What is it exactly? Well, it is your safe place where you don't have to deal with many variables, right? It's your place where you understand— You understand the dynamic, you understand the parameters of your reality, and you don't have to venture outside. You get to stay inside and keep yourself safe and warm and comfortable. The problem is that this sort of environment is not a nurturing one for growth. There's no growth. Within the box of comfort. All the growth happens outside of the box of comfort. So, for those of you that are still challenged to have what it is you want, or like people that message me and say, "Hey, I've listened to all the stuff, and I've read the book, and I've listened to your videos, and I still am not seeing results!" Well, this is exactly why you probably aren't seeing results! You have all the knowledge, but you're still existing within your box of comfort. So, this box of comfort initiates thoughts like, "This is my lot in life. This is what I have. I have to try to make do with the situation that's been given to me. This is it," right? This is being— This is you being caught up in that Script that is your life, and not realizing that there is actually an exit if you decide to take it. Again, this— inside of the box of comfort, you ask yourself things like "Why don't I have what I want? Why are all other people getting the things that they want?" If you're feeling envious about seeing something that somebody else has— The person probably has it because they were willing to exit the box. Now, if you're wanting to take more for yourself, you have the key, right? This is what it's about, from this perspective, right? From this perspective. So, the box of comfort, again, your habitual life. This is the daily grind that you do, you don't do anything differently. You're comfortable, you're safe, you're secure. You don't have to make new decisions, you don't have to go venture outside or do anything that is new to you or your layer of reality. So, what is outside of the box of comfort? Lots of opportunities, right? Alternatives flow. You are not going to access— the Alternatives Flow in your box of comfort. Your box of comfort is ultimately a place of control. And accessing the Alternatives Flow is about letting go and getting into the flow of variations, not trying to control the scenario from inside of your little pod of comfort. Outside of the box is destinations unknown, right? This is the Alternatives Flow. A vast network of infinite possibilities. This is different variations, new Lifelines. This is risk and reward. So, oftentimes, what keeps us inside of our box of comfort is we are frightened of the risk that's involved with venturing out. But the flipside to risk is obviously there's reward. You have to take the risk to gain the reward. Right? The rewards aren't gonna just flow into your box of comfort and present themselves to you without you taking action that may propose to you some risk. So, what keeps us inside of the box of comfort? Well, first, fear of hearing "no." This is a huge one. This is such a funny one too, because— No, for me, like, I actually appreciate hearing "no" now, because I know that I have pushed it to the extent that I can. "No" is like a parameter of my new expanded zone, right? I'm not in my box of comfort anymore, I'm in the Alternative Space. I've exited the box. And when I hear a "no," I know that I've reached— that furthest corner of that variation. So, I actually like to hear "no" because then I know the space in between me and what I was going for and heard the "no", I have a lot in between there that I can work with, right? So, I have actually learned, or trained myself to want to hear "no"! I love to pitch things to people and hear a "no"! I know that sounds crazy! I love to negotiate in my other businesses and hear a "no." Because if I hear a "no," that means I've gotten in there and I've done as much as I can do, right? So, letting go of the fear of learning "no"— or fear of hearing "no." I've referred to this video a few times. I will put the link below to a TED Talk that I've referred to. A number of times. It is a guy that set the intention that for an entire calendar year, he wanted to hear "no" at least once a day. And really, what this boiled down to for him is a vast opening in the Alternative Space. If you become fearless of hearing "no," your possibilities open up to you exponentially. And it is absolutely amazing! What else keeps us here? Risk. Risk is a big one, right? People don't want to risk anything. "Well, I'm comfortable here, and this works for me!" Okay, but is it really working for you? Because a lot of people that are in their box of comfort are also very unhappy. So, it's time to start asking yourself some questions. What's more valuable, happiness? And feeling as though you're doing what you can do, or remaining in your box of comfort regardless of how uncomfortable it actually is, right? Okay. So, what else keeps us here? Limiting beliefs. This is a huge one! "I can't do this." "This stuff's for other people." "Success in different areas are for other people." "It's scary out there. I don't have what it takes." So, again— Putting yourself in a position where you start to restructure your belief system to accommodate the walls of the box of comfort unfolding, and you walking out into the Alternative Space with some new ideas for how you can take action in your external environment. Lastly, the action muscle is strong. Soft. Okay. So, this is where I'm going to definitely recommend, for those of you that have not watched my 30 Anomalous Action Challenge video, this is a challenge that I have given lots and lots and lots of times. People love it. We run them in the Facebook group sometimes, this challenge. This is you, for every single day of a calendar month— calendar month, taking one single action that is outside of your comfort zone. So, a lot of times I feel that people are in this box of comfort simply because their action muscle— that's what I call it, your ability to take action consistently and without being afraid— the action muscle has gone soft, so the person doesn't know how to take action. You've gotta train yourself to get into the habit of taking action. So, the 30 Anomalous Action Challenge is huge! And it's huge for a number of reasons. First, it opens up a bunch of possibilities and opportunities and variations outside of your box of comfort. And secondly, what it does is it helps you to train your ability to take action. So, even if you didn't necessarily see any results in your reality from taking the 30 Anomalous Action Challenge, which I don't think would be the case, and I don't think I've ever encountered anyone that hasn't seen results. Even Transurfing TV is actually a result of me taking my own 30 Anomalous Action Challenge. So, even if you don't see any results necessarily— After you complete that 30 Anomalous Action Challenge, you will be in the position to take action when opportunity presents itself to you. So, you won't be the character that just sticks the head out of the box and gets frightened and self-sabotages because you're scared. You will have trained yourself to be able to come out of the box more and more and more and more. And then this connects you with more variations, opportunities, and things that you can move on when Outer Intention does in fact bring you new possibilities, right? So, again, the solution— and I know I just went over the 30 Anomalous Action Challenge, that's number 1, okay? Number 2, getting comfortable with hearing "no," that's a big one. Just— Make it a game. You want to hear "no" for a month. Every day for a month, you want to hear a "no." I know this sounds crazy, but it actually works, and it'll turn you into a fearless Transurfer. And you can get so much done when you're able to take action and you're not afraid of hearing "no." Connect more to the Alternative Space. So, this is a great place to close this video out. A lot of times, I think that people are stuck inside their box of comfort because they haven't developed a relationship with the Alternative Space. As soon as you can start to look at what is external to you in a sense that you feel as though your possibilities are limitless and endless— and your world will in fact support you on your way to your intention or your goal, and you view the Alternative Space as supportive and not scary, right? So, this version, the Alternative Space is scary. And in the outside-of-the-box version, the Alternative Space— is supportive. Remember, there is evidence to support all theories. If you truly believe that the Alternative Space is scary and it's better for you to just stay inside of your box of comfort, safe and warm and comfortable, then you are going to gather plenty of evidence that will support that theory. If you have decided that you are going to create a new theory for yourself, "I'm getting out of my box of comfort. The Alternative Space is supportive and beautiful and full of opportunity and variables and new Lifelines, and full of reward," then your world is going to present to you all the ways in which you can materialize that reality for yourself as well. This is exactly what I've done, and it absolutely works! So, it's about acknowledging where you are now. And if you're in here, start to implement some of this stuff and see if you can come out a little bit more and a little bit more and a little bit more. And anytime you feel yourself starting to self-sabotage, remember this illustration and be like, "This is me just frightened of the Alternative Space," right? Start to pull yourself out with these actionable steps. So, let me know what you think of this video, everybody! Like, comment, subscribe, all that stuff! And I will see you all tomorrow! Bye, guys!