Episode 84: Top 10 Moments Of 2022

Hello, and welcome to the Pillow Talks podcast. We're your hosts, Vanessa and Zander Marin. I'm a sex Therapist with over 20.

Years of experience, and I'm just a regular dude. We share the ups and downs in our relationship while giving you step by step techniques for improving yours.

Make sure you subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally doable sex tips, practical relationships advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more. It's the sex education you wish you'd had. Today we have a very special episode. Since this is the last episode of 2022, and since 2022 is the first year that we had a full year of the podcast, we decided that we had to do the year in review and spend an episode just reflecting, reminiscing LA about your favorite and our favorite Pillow talks moments of 2022.

All right, let's do it.

You excited?

I am. I'm excited and nervous because I've not been allowed to look at the top moments yet because I guess someone needs to react to it. I'm not someone.

Do you have a top moment?

I'd have to think about it.

Okay, you have time to think about it for a minute, and then we'll come back to you. But let's first talk a little bit about the most exciting project that we have coming in 2023, which is our book, Sex Talks.

Hell, yeah.

We wrote a book. We've been working on this for all of 2022. All of 2021 as well. Writing a book is real hard, y'.

All.

And it is finally coming out February 7th. Sex talks. The five crucial conversations that every couple needs to have. This book is all about how to talk about sex with your partner. Because here's the wild thing. Sex is the most universal thing that we do in relationships, and yet we don't ever learn how to talk about it. When we were preparing to write this book, we realized there is not a single book about how to talk to your partner about sex. How to talk to your kids about sex.

Plenty of those.

Tons of those. Not a single book about how to talk to your partner about sex. And the thing with talking about sex is, like, that's not, you know, new advice or anything like that. Like, it's not rocket science. The idea that, like, you should talk to your partner. Partner about your sex life. Right.

Especially if it's something you do and something that is important to you.

Everybody's heard, like, you've heard the advice, like, yeah, talk about it. Open and honest communication. But I think most people really struggle with how do I talk about it, when do I bring it up, what do I say, how do I phrase things like, what do I do if my partner reacts this way? So, you know, one of our biggest pet peeves is vague and generic and unhelpful advice like, just talk about it. Just let it happen. Just relax. So we really wanted to address the specific nitty gritty details of how to talk about sex with your partner. And in particular, to boil down this huge topic talking about sex down into five conversations. So five, That's a nice easy number, right? Anybody can do five.

It's a doable number. And the way that we've broken it down and laid it out, they are five very doable conversations. None of them. None of them are like expert level conversations. Anybody can have these conversations.

So we're really excited for this book. We really think it has the potential to change so many relationships. And we're really excited about how accessible this is going to be too. Like, you know, it depends on where you order the book, but it's like 22 to $27, so it's going to be really accessible for a lot of people. And so we are throwing our whole hearts and souls and business behind this book because we believe in it. So. And honestly, writing a book has been a personal dream of mine for so long. So this is like a dream come true. And so what we are doing is we're asking for your support. So if you're a fan of pillow talks, if you're a fan of ours, we would be so grateful to get your support with the book. And we are gonna make it so above and beyond worth your while to support us.

Oh, yeah.

We're not just asking, like, please buy the book. We're doing some kind of nutty stuff for you.

I mean, we are. One could. One could argue that we are literally giving you money to buy this book. We are giving you way more value than the book costs in terms of what we are going to throw in for free.

This is not a good business decision because we make like one to two dollars off of every book sold.

Yeah, we make a couple bucks. I think three at the mo. Yeah. No, it's like a couple. Yeah, it's in the 1 to $2 range.

So we don't make a ton of money off of this book. You do not write a book to make a lot of money. But we are going to be giving you a ton of from our business that you could go onto Our website and buy for a substantial amount of money. We are gonna give them to you for free. So let's run through the list. Okay, you wanna tell us the first one?

Well, I'm not allowed to look at any of the notes, but, you know, I know this. I know. I know this. The number one, the biggest thing that we are giving for absolute free the moment.

Absolute free.

We are giving absolutely free the moment you buy the book. Basically what happens is you buy the book on Amazon, on Barnes and Noble, on any of the links that we give you. Then you come back to our book page and you fill out a little form where you just say, hey, I bought the book. Here's my invoice number. This is like, what type of book I bought. We send you totally for free. Our Dirty Talk 101 guide, which you could buy for $69 on our website right now. Lots of people are buying that for $69, but you can get that for free when you just buy our book. So that's the number one. And Dirty Talk 101 is this incredible guide to show you in a really easy way. Kind of like our book will show you how to talk about sex. Dirty Talk 101 is going to show you step by step how to. Yeah. How to talk sexy. Like, how to start incorporating more dirty talk into your sex life, which is one of the easiest and most fun ways to just really spice things up. Amp things up in the bedroom, and.

You'Ll do it in a way that feels authentic to you. That's really the fun part of this guide. There's some super fun, like, worksheets that you fill out together and separately, looking at, like, what words you like and don't like. So it's not about, like, here's a script from a porn. And just imitate it. It's like figuring out your voice in the bedroom. So it's super fun. There's also our masterclass, how to Know what yout Want in the Bedroom. So if you're somebody who just feels kind of like, I just don't know what I want. My partner asked me, like, what do you want? Tell me what you want. You freeze up. Like, this is such a great, practical, simple masterclass.

Yeah. I mean, you might be thinking, God, like, I don't want to talk about sex with my partner because I know they're going to ask me what I want. I don't know what I want. So how the hell am I supposed to have this conversation when I have nothing to talk about?

Yeah. So That's a great masterclass. We have that on sale for $19, so. But you're getting it Absolutely for free with this?

Yeah, we're. So we're up to $88 of things that you're getting?

Yes. Okay. The next thing that we're giving you is to kind of navigate the time between now and when the book comes out. Because we know pre ordering it's a little annoying. Let's be real. Like, yeah, why would you order a book when you can't get it? Like, we all like that. Instant gratification, right?

Yeah. The book comes out February 7th, and we recognize there's a little bit of time between now and then.

So we're also giving you a guide called how to talk about sex with your partner, even if you never have before. So this is great for who are like a whole book about talking about sex. Like, we haven't ever talked about it. So this is like a great guide. You'll get it immediately. You can get started, set yourself up for success. When sex talks comes out, you're also going to get a workbook. So we are actually in the middle of putting this together right now. Our whole team has been reading the book. We're all going through it chapter by chapter and reflecting on, like, how could we help people go deeper with this chapter? Like, reflection questions, more conversations to have with your partner, fun exercises you can can do together, journal prompts. So this is going to be an incredible. I mean, honestly, a lot of books have workbooks that come out with them, and it's like an entirely separate book that you have to pay. Oftentimes the workbooks are more expensive, like 30 or 40 bucks for it, or.

They come out like one or two years after the book comes out, like after the book has been successful. And we're like, hey, we're just gonna short circuit that entire process. We want you to have something to take home with you as soon as the book comes out so that you can get the most out of the book and the most out of these conversations.

And you are also going to get a ticket to our virtual book launch event. So we're going to have a little party. We're going to have my family here. So if you've ever seen my parents on Instagram, you can check out the V's parents highlight. They're very entertaining. So we're going to do a whole, like, celebration party after the book comes out. So you'll get a ticket to come join us and hang out as well. And on top of all of that. Should I spoil what the surprise is?

Oh, I guess you're already going there. What is the surprise?

Okay people, nobody else is gonna find out until a little bit later, but I guess we can let Pillow Talks listen to this.

Yeah, let the listen in on the goods.

Okay, so the final thing here we are doing our Intimate or Nasty event in February right around Valentine's Day. We did it last year. It was the most popular thing we did all year long, hands down, if you haven't been following us for that long. Intimate or nasty is our two popular 30 day challenges. We have the 30 day sex challenge and the 30 day connection challenge. So the sex challenge is all about like physical intimacy, not just intercourse though the Connection challenge is all about emotional intimacy. So we have them together at the same time with this kind of fun. Like, what are you feeling? You feeling intimate? You feeling nasty? You want to do both?

Yeah, you can buy one or you can buy both for a major discount.

And actually Intimate or Nasty was instead inspired by a Pillow Talks listener. Somebody said we were asking like, what makes sex great? And somebody was like, when it's intimate and nasty.

We were like, we are taking that.

So anyways, Intimate or Nasty is coming up in February and we decided, okay, let's just truly make this a no brainer. If you pre order the book, you will get a $30 discount on intimate and Nasty.

Yeah. So you're basically getting the book for free, plus a couple dollars depending on who you buy it from and plus another $88 at least in value in, in free stuff.

And that's, I mean, we haven't even gone over the value of like the workbook and the virtual event. All that kind of stuff. Like this is bananas.

Yeah.

Why are we doing this? Well, should we reconsider?

No, we, we shouldn't. The, the reason that we're doing this is because pre orders are so, are so, so, so important for books. Like they signal to the publisher, like how many books do I produce? So to bookstores, like how many books should they order?

And yeah, we've already seen an impact from this. Our publisher, because you guys have been so supportive of the book and already pre ordered a lot. They ordered more. So this is already having an impact and it will continue to have an impact.

Yeah. And so really what it comes down to is wanting to have as many pre orders as possible come release date because that impacts our ability to get featured by bookstores, by top book lists and stuff like that so that we can get our book in front of so many more people. Because, you know, if you've been listening to the podcast, you know, like, hey, literally everyone can benefit from these types of conversations from this information. And the problem is it's just hard to get the message out there. Like, we, for example, we really struggle to even run advertising on Facebook or Instagram because they consider us a sexual service. And so just any kind of help that we can get to get our message out there, you know, without doing this type of advertising that we're not allowed to do, is so helpful.

We're trying to pitch ourselves to get media, you know, to cover this book. And we're having media organizations turn us down because they're like, oh, we can't talk about sex. Like, we can't have that on our TV show. So it's, you know, it's tricky when we're trying to take the taboo away from sex. We're trying to make it this more comfortable topic and normalize it for everybody.

But there's still some taboo.

There's still some taboo. So we really need your support and it's cool because this is something that we can all do together as a community. Really contribute to taking the shame and the stigma away from sex and making it a topic that's more comfortable and more out in the open. So I want to address one final quick thing about this whole pre order thing. We are just doing all of those freebies for the hardcover pre order. The book is available in other formats. There's a Kindle, there's an audiobook. But one of the really weird, to be totally honest things that we've learned about the book world is that with pre orders, only the hardcover counts. So the book world does not. See if you pre order the Kindle version, it like, doesn't count. They don't count that towards anything.

Yeah, we could have like a million people buy the Kindle in advance and like, bookstores would not get the signal that, oh, this is a really popular book that we should feature.

Yeah. So we totally respect that everybody has different preferences and that there are accessibility issues around book formats, but we are trying to focus on the hardcover as much as possible. So that's why we're doing all the freebies for that. So if you're somebody who's just really an audiobook person, maybe you could get the hardcover and like, give it as a gift for a friend.

Makes a great gift.

Yeah, you're still like getting all of those freebies and bonuses. Like, the value of it is just so bananas. So you can find all of the information @sex talks book.com we'll put that link in the show notes for this episode. But again, it's, it's sextalksbook.com and the.

Most important thing is after you purchase the book, make sure you go back to that page and complete step two. That is how you are going to get all the freebies. I know, it's really exciting. You navigate away to Amazon or wherever it is and you're like, hell yeah, I got that book. Remember to come back for step two, because as sophisticated as we'd like to think we are, Amazon does not tell us all the people who buy the book that we have no way to know. So you got to come back to sextalksbook.com and fill out the little form and give us some basic information about your order.

Yeah. And it doesn't matter where you buy it from. @sextalksbook.com we have links to all the major resellers, so you can just go right there and click your favorite one. But again, come back for step two. So thank you guys so much in advance for your support. This really means the world to us. We just like. I can't describe how excited we are for this book and how much we hope it gets into the hands of couples everywhere and transforms their sex lives. So thank you so much for being a part of this with us, for being there with us every step of the way of this long, long journey. We're just so excited to see what it's like when it is finally out into the world and in your hands. Okay, so let's talk about 2022 in pillow talks Land. Pop quiz for you, Xander.

Okay.

Do you remember the first episode of 2022?

No.

There's literally no way I would have guessed.

I don't.

But I, I. You have a really good memory. So I thought maybe could it potentially.

Have been something around, like sex or relationship resolutions for 2022? All right, well, that was just a.

Very unusual episode, actually.

Okay. I mean, my guess was only just based on logic. Like, okay, what's the first week? What do people talk about in the first week of the year? So it was a good guess.

Okay. It was episode 33, the episode we almost didn't release. Oh. Do you remember what that episode is about?

Was it us having like a check in?

Uh huh. About what?

Just about life, about our relationship goals.

No, it was a check in about the holidays. Ah.

Yeah.

I actually went back and re listened to a little bit of it this morning because I was like, what was that episode? I don't remember that.

Yeah, I think what we did, we just record it. Super off the cuff.

Yeah, there was. We sat down with the mics and had a conversation. It was completely unplanned beforehand.

Yeah, we usually, you know, what we do is, you know, we have a whole team that we work with and we talk about potential episodes and we kind of slot them into the calendar so that we know every week what we're going to be recording. But this one, we were just like, hey, let's sit down and record this. Okay, I remember that.

Yeah, it was a very interesting one. Really raw and emotional. Talking about some ups and downs of the holiday season. And we also reported back on our. The holiday classic.

Oh, yes.

So that was an interesting episode. So from there we had 52 episodes. We did not take any breaks. In 2022, we had a fresh episode every week. We recorded pillow talks in three different locations. We did, because we moved in in 2022, so we recorded in LA. Then we had a temporary little rental we were living in. And now we are here in our studio in our home in Santa Barbara.

I'm trying to remember, was there ever a situation where we even recorded in, like, another location? But no, I don't think so.

Yeah, just the three. We have hit just about 2.5 million downloads.

Wow.

Which is bonkers.

Totally bonkers.

We also have all of our podc up on YouTube. We have them fully transcribed for accessibility issues, which I think is really great to be able to do that. And what's next for the podcast in 2023 is we're gonna be videoing. Videotaping.

Do you feel me?

Videotaping?

No, videotaping. When was the last time you used a videotape?

Can you still say videotape?

Do you even know? I think some people on this, listening to this podcast may not even know what a videotape is.

It's like when we had to ask our kids. Still freak dancing?

Oh, yeah. I mean, well, I. For example, we used to have two VCRs at my house so that you could videotape thing, you know, illicitly. Illicitly, you know, record that video that you got from Blockbuster.

Okay. So, yeah, we're not videotape. We're filming.

Yeah, we are. We are in the process of setting up our studio to have a nice backdrop, some good seating, and getting our mics and stuff mounted properly so that we can actually be sitting in, you know, somewhere where we can have the camera on us and it looks nice. We could try to film us right now, but it looks a little janky. And it's good for recording, but not very good for y' all looking at us. So we are very excited about that. I think it's gonna be very fun. Yeah, it's, you know, acquiring furniture right now with. With supply chain constraints is a bit challenging. So it's taking us a little while, but it's coming. It's coming, and it will be very exciting.

Oh, what are we talking about?

It will be very stimulating visually.

Oh, okay. Can't wait.

But don't worry for those of you that are loyal podcast listeners, you know, like in the car or, you know, on Apple podcasts, on Spotify or wherever, the podcast will still be there. We will just be releasing little clips on Instagram, on TikTok, on YouTube. You could watch the whole thing. Most likely. It'll be fun. So there will just be tons of options.

And here are our most popular episodes of the year. Number one, our episode, the truth about why we are child free by far and away. That was number 37. That was the most popular episode. And we'll get back to that one in a minute.

Always and forever.

Do you remember what number two is?

Is it. Is it butt stuff or is it something else?

It's something else. Butt stuff is not on the list.

I don't know.

Then episode 49, the truth about squirting.

Oh, yes. Okay.

Then there was Ask Us anything part three, the extra spicy edition.

So the people like extra spicy better than just, you know, regular boring old vanilla. Ask Us Anything.

Yes, that was episode 71. And interestingly, the ask Us anything episodes were very popular this year. We have some more planned. I did not think they were going to be that popular.

No, you usually when. When I hear Vanessa saying, oh, I don't know if people are going to like this episode.

Yeah, that means.

Ooh, I think we probably have a hit on our hands because almost invariably, every episode that Vanessa thinks no one wants to listen to turns out to be one of our best episodes.

Then we had 58, the sex act you should be doing but probably aren't. We're gonna leave that one a mystery. If you want to know what it is, go back and listen to episode 58. And then our number five, rounding out our top five was episode 69. What do men really think about part two?

Interesting.

Not part one. Part two.

Very interesting.

And we also this. I was just scrolling back, like, looking at all of the episodes that we did. We covered some really interesting hot button topics. We Talked about weaponized incompetence. We talked about what do performance problems really mean? Initiation, trying to conceive, and how to keep things spicy in your sex life, your connection alive even when you're trying to conceive. But stuff like you mentioned. We had a very popular episode about are you more roommates or romantic partners? We also had one about the title of this one was great. Putting the o back in mom was how to feel sexy again after having kids. We had a 69 episode. It was not episode 69, but we did release it on six nine.

Oh, man. Poor. I guess you can't win them all. It would have been great if we had. If we had known that on 6 9, June 9th, we could be recording our 69th episode, we could have decided to, you know, launch the podcast specifically so that we'd have episodes. Just kidding. That's way too much.

We also talked about flirting, hygiene, a great episode called are you sexually compatible? And one of my favorite ones was at the very beginning of the year, I want you to want me. That was a great. I want you to want me.

All right, that's all. I'm gonna sing this episode.

Well, we'll come back to that. Don't worry. Okay, so we went over to Instagram and we asked you guys, what were your favorite moments of the pillow talks podcast from this year? It was hard to pick, but we narrowed it down to 10. So let's kick it off with number 10. This one was all about me and fucking up sayings.

Classic. Classic.

I guess videotaping kind of falls into that. I just had another one yesterday. I said. What did I say? Two steps forward, one step back.

I mean, hey, if we could. Yeah, that's a really optimistic way, I guess, of looking at things because, you know, it's one step forward, two steps back. But if instead of that, it was two steps forward, one step back, I mean, I'll take that all day, every day, you're moving forward one step every single time.

I don't remember any of the other ones I did, but I know that they're probably like, every other episode.

You know, I wouldn't be surprised if your mom said, two steps forward, one step back. That would be just her way of putting a positive spin on things for you, for you, you guys, as a kid. So I think I wouldn't be surprised if she seeded that one in your mind.

Okay, next up, we have Xander's singing in so many different episodes. So I want to ask you, do you have a favorite song that you Sang this year.

I mean, I might need a. I might need a refresher on all the ones, but I might go with. I might go with. What was it? Was it. Did I sing Creed 1?

That is just what I was thinking of. I saw that and I was like. Like, I wanted to go back and listen to every episode and try to find the ones that you sang on, but I was like, I can't. Like, I can't do that. This is gonna take hours. And I. I was trying to remember the songs, and it was only the more recent ones came to mind, like Mariah Carey and Rod Stewart and that kind of stuff. But literally in this was trying to think of other ones. And that was the one that popped into my head.

Well, maybe it may be because I also broke your brain maybe a month or two ago when I discovered on YouTube the lead singer of Creed is a huge, I think, like, fan of the. Oh, shoot. God. Why are they. Oh, the Tampa. The Tampa Bay Rays. I was trying to remember if it was the Marlins or the Rays and he is a huge fan or I hope he's a huge fan, or else maybe they're just paid him money to record a song for the Rays that was just like. It was just like a hype. A hype jam for the Rays being in the playoffs.

You really should go look that up.

You should. You should look it up. Just like, look up like Creed, Tampa Bay Rays. It is mind boggling. I'm just going to leave it there. Like, you. You might be mind boggled at how bad it is. You might be mind boggled at how good it is, how incredible it is. It's a jam. It's a jam. We'll leave it there. The lyrically genius.

I'm gonna say, oh, wow. Okay. All right, number eight. I'm for a couple of these. What I'm gonna do is I'm gonna tell you what the thing was that someone responded like their favorite moment. And I'm gonna see if you can remember what the fuck we were talking about, like, why that came up.

I mean, this is. This is. The million dollar question is like, do I remember the funny moment?

Okay, first one. A wet fact.

Oh, yeah. Yes, I do remember that. I'm trying to remember what that was in reference to. It was like the opposite. The opposite of something. God, what was it? It was like, well, what's the opposite.

Of a wet fact?

I can't remember. I can't remember now.

What's the opposite of wet?

Dry, Dry. Dry humping.

I don't know how is fact the opposite of humping?

Oh, dry.

What's something else related to your sex life? That can be. Dry spell there.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's a magic spell.

You think we did a dry humping episode?

No, I don't. I'm just trying to think of anything.

Should we do a dry hu. Humping episode? Come over to Instagram, Vanessa and Xander, let us know if you want a whole dry humping.

That's actually, that's. That's a very interesting idea because I feel like so much of our journey with this business has been discovering, like, oh, like, we. We need to peel it back even further and let's address an even more basic idea. Or like, you know, oh, let's do an episode on kissing. You know, years ago, we had been like, oh, people in a hottest. You know, when we came out with the foreplay guides, you know, before that, it was like, oh, well, we're not gonna, like, we're not gonna show people, like, how to give a blowjob or how to give a hand job or.

Yes, we are.

Or whatever. Because it's like, oh, people know how to do that, you know. Oh, we're focused on, you know, more intricate technique or, like, how to have orgasms or whatever. Not, like, how to do the thing that gets you to there. And then. And then it's like, oh, wait, no, actually, people want to know about that. So dry humping could be. Could be the next. Next big one. That could be our next most popular episode.

How to dry hump. All right, coming in at number seven, Xander's Piss and O. Yeah, Classic.

I was. I was gonna say that might be. That might be my favorite moment.

Pissino.

Yeah, the. The piss and O. That was my response to men who insist that their. That their female partner squirts.

That was. That was episode 49, squirting.

It's me. It's me trying to. To flip it around on guys and be like, okay, if you feel like. If you still feel like, oh, well, I just need her to squirt in order for me to be satisfied. It's kind of akin to if I were to tell you, well, hey, guys, Xander here. I got a. I got a hot secret for you. There's actually a way for you to piss while you're having an orgasm, and that's what all women secretly want. And you're not really having real sex unless you're having a piss and O. Like, yeah, are you gonna go. Are you gonna, like, bend over backwards to figure out how to have a pissing O or are you gonna be like, you know what? This is fucking ridiculous. I'm like, I am very happy with my sex life the way it is. I'm happy with my orgasm the way it is. I'm not going to start being like, oh, God, I'm not having real sex without a pisce. No.

All right, number six, the milkman.

Oh, the milkman.

The milkman. Do you remember what that episode was from?

You know what? I don't. I'm getting it confused because there was another classic moment that came out of that came out of this milkman thing in a different episode. I know that much.

No, no, no, you're wrong.

I'm wrong. Great. Okay, shoot. Give it to me.

That was from the role playing episode.

Man. I mean, hey, that could be sexy. Hey, lady, got some milk for you.

That's Big Al.

Where do I put these jugs? Or maybe I guess that would be way better if it was a. If it was a milk. The milk lady. The. The milk woman is coming. Hey, I got some big jugs of milk for you. Oh, God. This is. This is getting, like, kind of prepubescent really quickly. Let's.

Okay, do we need to move on to number five?

Yeah, sorry, I feel a little dirty now.

Okay, it's not gonna get any better because number five is Xander acting out his fake orgasm. What?

I don't know.

Is that what you think orgasms sound like?

No, it's not. I'm trying to remember what episode that was in, though.

Well, I'm gonna give you the acronym because if I gave you what it actually what the phrase is, you're gonna know it. F O. I. Oh, I know already.

You don't even need to continue. Full on intercourse in my anus.

All right. What was that episode from?

That was from butt stuff. Number. The first one, I assume.

Yes, the number. Episode 68.

Yeah, I mean, we. We were talking about how most people, when they think of any type of butt stuff, they. They jump straight to anal intercourse, AKA full on intercourse in my anus. When in reality there are a lot of other options on the table. And when you jump ahead to full on intercourse in my or Uranus, you're gonna have a bad time. You are most likely gonna have a bad time. Most people do. And that's because they haven't gotten used to, like, what anal play is like and feeling comfortable with it. So, you know, we talk in that episode all about all the other options that are on the table and should be taken Advantage of. Before you go on to full on, I was gonna actually just give you the acronym. I don't even know what it is. So I'll just say it Full on Intercourse in my. Or Uranus.

You should definitely listen to episode 68. It's such a good one. There's also, I believe that is also the episode where you talk about butthole just winking at you. It's a good one to listen. Okay, number three comes straight from Jackie, who goes over our episodes and she puts together all the show notes. And if you've never seen these before, you gotta go to our website, vmtherapy.com there's a podcast link right in the top right. And for every episode, Jackie puts together a description of it. So you know what it's about. Especially when we have kind of these titles like the episode we almost didn't release. But she puts timestamps at the most interesting or important pieces of the episode. So if you're wanting to, like jump back and hear a certain part, Jackie's got that all for you. So she is our queen of putting together all of those notes.

Notes.

Her favorite moment from this year was in episode 75, am I being unreasonable? And Jackie said, you and Xander said everything. I was yelling when listening to this reader question at 2811. See, she is the queen of the timestamps.

Thanks, Jackie.

But the mic drop at 2925, if he doesn't perform at his job as husband and dad, he will lose it too. She said she was just screaming at the podcast.

Some real talk there.

So go back and listen to that episode. That was a very interesting reader question that we were answering coming in at number two. This is our last funny moment. A lot of people mentioned this one and I think this is probably my favorite moment as well. Can you guess it?

Is it Time Theft? Yes, it's milkman it's. Or no, sorry, it's not milkman related.

It's not the milkman, but it's close.

It is. It is another. You know, if you have. If you have fantasies of, you know, people that come to your house on the daily having sex with you.

No, this was not a fantasy.

Similar one. Well, no, I know, but it's. I mean, it's. It's the real life version of maybe. What.

Do you know what episode it was from?

God, now I can't remember what episode is from. I mean, it was. Someone wrote in saying, oh, oh, was it. It was like Sex confession.

Yes. Episode 79, sex confessions. And we've got another time stamp. 2520-2720.

Yeah. So it was a. Yeah. Woman wrote in saying that she had sex with her mailman. And I was like. I was like, hey. I mean, you know, if I was like, next in line on that mail route, I'd be like, hey, that's some. That's some time theft right there. This guy's on the clock. He's supposed to be working. He's supposed to be. I'm. I have a very important piece of mail that I'm waiting for. And they're over there just on the job. On the job now. So the funny thing is with that episode is that we were. We were re. We were listening to that episode, and I didn't know that I was going to make that joke. I didn't know what the confession was in advance. But we had another confession earlier on in that episode that also could have qualified as time theft. It was a nurse orgy.

Like seven nurses.

Like seven nurses. I was like, were they at the hospital? Did people need their help while they were having an orgy? I'm trying to think.

Probably not the bedpan change.

Yeah. Hopefully they were on break or they were just at a sex party outside of work. Who knows?

We love you, nurses. You guys deserve to have a break.

We love you. You deserve orgasms. And, you know, I know sometimes in the middle of a stressful day, you're on break and the supply closet just gotta rub one out.

H. That was. I. Like, I was almost crying. I think that's the hardest I've laughed all year. It was just so out of nowhere. And you were so serious when you said it. Like, I couldn't recompose myself. I was just, like, crying over here.

She died. And the funny thing is. She died. The funny thing is I was totally convinced that it was a line from the Office. And it's not. No, it isn't. It is an amalgamation of things. Like. Like, I looked this up. There is not actually a lot. Like, I thought Dwight says, that's time theft at some point in time. Or like, Jim jokingly says that to Dwight, but it's not. It's like, it's related, but it's. It's not quite the same. Like, what. What will come up is the episode where Jim is, like, tracking what Dwight is doing.

Yeah. And he says time.

No, he doesn't, though. That's the thing.

He doesn't.

So if someone. If. If there's another part of the Office or some other similar comedy show where someone casually says Time theft. Please let us know. I did all this research because we were like, oh, we're gonna have to do a reel about this. And, like, you know, kind of just highlight this funny joke in other ways. And then we didn't, because I couldn't actually find that it ever happened.

My mind is blown.

Yeah. So if I'm wrong, please let me know. I would love to know where this idea. I got this idea in my head. I was like. I was like, I'm not being original at all. I'm totally just doing a joke that I've heard before. Like, you know, an unappreciated joke from the office. But alas, maybe I am that creative.

I don't believe you still. So come over to Instagram, Vanessa and Xander, let us know. But also, the funny thing about this is the woman who sent in that confession, she wrote back after the episode came out, and she was like, oh, actually, it was not time theft. Like, it was after his roots.

Oh, she, like, asked him over for a date.

He came over after he was done delivering all the other packages. So maybe he had a little time.

Theft, but he brought his own package over.

He did bring his own package.

Good.

And our number one drum roll, please.

That's my drum roll.

That's like a fart noise. You're not gonna, like, tap on the desk or something?

Okay.

There we go. Our number one pillow talks moment of 2022 was actually an entire episode, episode 37, the truth about why We Are Child Free. That episode, we already said it was our most popular by far of the whole year, and it just really, really resonated with so many people. We've never gotten as much feedback from an episode as we have from that one. And in fact, we got. Got so much feedback that we are doing a follow up to that episode. We're going to be recording that soon. That'll be out sometime in the beginning of 2023. So we're just so honored that this podcast touched so many of you that it made you think, it made you feel. So many of you said you cried along with us. That was definitely the most vulnerable we've been in the podcast. I don't think I've cried in any other episode. So it was a really tender podcast. And it was honestly, like, it was very hard for us to put that out there. It was hard to record. It was to put out, like, not knowing what kind of reaction we were going to get, worrying about judgment. And so it just, you know, I. I still have, like, a little tiny Bit of a vulnerability hangover from that episode. I know I've got another one coming with this follow up that we're going to be recording, but it's just really nice to know, especially when you are so vulnerable. It's really nice to get such a great reception to it. So not a funny moment, but definitely, like our most impactful moment of 2022.

Yeah, definitely.

I want to give one honorable mention, though. Your toe. Basket weaving. I don't remember what episode.

Oh, God. Did you take a picture of that?

I did.

Is it, like, posted with the show notes?

We posted it on Instagram, like, when that podcast came out. Maybe we'll put it in the show notes if we can dig it back up.

Or not. Or not.

Basket weaving with his toes in the middle of recording.

Yep. My double Morton's toe.

Well, that is it. That is our 2022 recap. How do you feel about a whole year of pillow talks?

My mind is still boggled that we have recorded 52 episodes in a year. That's a lot of episodes.

A lot of episodes.

Yeah. I mean, it feels like just yesterday that we were starting the podcast and we had no idea how it was gonna go, that we were really gonna be doing this every week and loving it, just you and me. It's pretty cool. I mean, I feel really honored. I'm so grateful all are here to listen, to laugh with us, to. To cheer us on, to try to stump me with your emojis and make me laugh with your funny stories. So I just feel like the luckiest guy in the world.

Oh, that's really sweet. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. Oh, it's been really fun recording this podcast with you. It's. It's made me think. I've learned a lot, you know, coming up with new ideas and topics. We've loved all the feedback that we've gotten from you guys and listening to it, I mean, just knowing that we really cover a lot here. You know, it's like we laugh, we cry, we learn. It just. It's a lot of different experiences, and I'm just really grateful to be able to talk about the wide range of the human experience. But I hope that it's been really valuable for you guys listening along with us this year. And I want to give a special shout out to the folks behind the scene who make this happen. We already called out Jackie Keely also helps us out with preparing for all of these episodes, helping us come up with topics and putting together notes so we can be Organized and efficient. And Art, our beloved podcast editor, he.

Makes us sound so professional.

He has really auto tuned Xander a few times. He's added some sound effects.

Yeah. Sound effect maestro. We love it. We love it. We never know what we're gonna find. Little Easter egg from Art.

Actually, that is a little tip. There have been some Easter eggs at the end of a number of episodes. I feel like most people don't hear them because you start to hear the outro and you, okay, that's the end of the episode. But you gotta listen to the end every couple episodes.

There's something funny or weird or there's something at the end sometimes.

So thank you to Art, also the keeper of all of our secrets, because he gets to hear the full recording. Sometimes we are cranky with each other. Sometimes we say dumb things that we're like, art, please take that out. Don't put that in. And he has not released the Pillow Talks behind the scenes tell all yet. So we appreciate that.

Yeah. Thanks, Art.

So, so thanks to everybody behind the scenes, helping all that teamwork makes the dream work. And thank you to our listeners for being along on the journey with us. And we can't wait to hang out with you in all of 2023. So don't forget to head on over to sextalksbook.com that's sextalksbook.com to pre order sex Talks and get all those ridiculous freebies. We can't wait for you to get all this. All this stuff.

Yeah, I mean, get it. Get it before we realize we've made a horrible, horrible decision. We take them all away. No, just kidding. We're not taking them away. Yeah. But, yeah, Please pre order before February 7th, ideally today, because you're gonna get all this stuff now.

I mean, you'll get it right now.

Yeah, it would be silly to wait because you would just be waiting longer to get all these things. If you order now, you're gonna get all that stuff. You're gonna get that discount. You're gonna get everything. Everything. All right, all right. Well, that's it for today's episode of Pillow Talks. Thank you so much for listening. Join us again next week in 2023 when we talk about how to be sexy.

There is some singing in that episode.

Sexy. Yeah, we've actually already recorded that episode.

We did.

Because we decided last minute. We gotta squeeze. We gotta squeeze this one in.

Squeeze it.

We gotta shove this one in there.

Full on intercourse in your podcast.

Sure. Yeah. Full on intercourse in your podcast. Is this an Easter egg? We didn't really like. Wait, but Art.

Put it at the end.

I mean, this is the end.

Auto tune us. Put a song in, insert silence.

So people have to really wait before they get to this part. No, just kidding. That's.

Bye.

Bye. Thanks, everyone. We love you.