If you want your male partner to be more romantic, I got you. First, let's talk about what not to do. Definitely don't say you never do anything romantic for me. All that's going to do is cue him to start arguing with you about the details of the last time he thinks he did do something romantic for you. Also, don't say, I need you to be more romantic. That feels way too big and open ended and he's just not going to be sure what to do with that. Don't talk about other people in other relationships. All that's going to do is make him compare himself to other people and probably feel bad. In fact, don't even use the word romance. I think this word is way too big and loaded, especially for men. Instead, it's way easier to focus on talking about things that make you feel loved and appreciated. What do you actually do? You are going to take the first step yourself. So ask your partner, what was the last thing I said or did that made you feel really appreciated? Take a mental note of their answer and try to do that thing as soon as possible. Now, hopefully your partner hears that question and asks you the same thing after they answer you. And if they don't, you can say, look, the reason I asked you that question is because I've been thinking about it a lot and I've been realizing there are a couple of things that are especially meaningful to me. Here's what they are. And look, I would love for us to each be doing more of those things that are really meaningful to each of us. Bottom line, men respond really well to direct requests. If there is something that is going to feel good to you, if there's something that you you want, just ask him for it and see what he does.
