Vanessa Marin, a sex therapist, and Xander demonstrate three positions that help men last longer: cowgirl, lotus, and spooning. Each reduces intensity through grinding or shallow movement instead of thrusting, and works better when partners communicate and guide the motion together.
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Want to last longer in bed? If so, you are not alone. So do most men. So today, we are going to give you three amazing sex positions that are going to help you do just that.
But first, we're curious. We want to know, for research purposes, what do you think is the ideal amount of time for a man to last? Let us know in the comments down below.
All right, so if you're brand new to our channel, we first just want to say, hi. We are Vanessa and Xander Marin. Vanessa here is a sex therapist. We've been together for 14 years. And these cute little faces behind us are our pugs, Maggie and Winston. Maybe you can see them, maybe you can't. Who knows?
And we are here to give you all the tools, tricks, and techniques that you need to create a truly extraordinary relationship inside and out of the bedroom. So if that's something that sounds interesting to you, go ahead and like this video and subscribe to our channel.
All right, first up, cowgirl.
All right, so this is a very sexy position. You get a great view during it. So all that you need to do is lie flat on your back. Your partner's gonna straddle you facing your head, lower themselves down onto your penis, and you get to just enjoy the ride.
Yeah. So it's not the most intense position for most men because it tends to be more of a grinding or a back and forth motion as opposed to an up and down motion, meaning that you'll likely be able to last longer. What I do want to say, though, is give this one a couple of tries. The first couple times you do it, you might actually come faster because you aren't in control of the motion, and that can be a little overwhelming. Give yourself a chance to get used to that. The important thing here is communicate with your partner when you want them to slow down or to take a break. Also, you can put your hands on your partner's hips and guide their motion so that you're in a bit more of control over the speed and intensity. All right, the next one is lotus position.
So this is a really interesting position. You're basically going to sit cross legged or with your legs extended, Whatever's more comfortable for you. You're gonna be sitting up, and so your partner's gonna straddle you again, facing you like they would in cowgirl. And they'll have, like, one leg on either side of your legs. They'll lower down so they're sitting in your lap. And once they're in place, you're gonna wrap your arms around their waist they're gonna wrap their arms around your neck. You're kind of like, holding on to each other for dear life.
You can also do this one from cowgirl, where you sit up, basically. So this one is really great for deeper penetration as well as lasting longer. So despite being it is nearly impossible for any kind of thrusting or fast movements, which are the things that tend to make you come faster. Instead, you're really just grinding against each other pretty slowly. And because your motion is limited, it's usually a lot easier to last longer. Last up spooning.
So this is a great position because it's relaxing. It's pretty low effort. It can feel very intimate, too. So to do this position, you're gonna lie on your sides facing the same direction. So you're gonna be the big spoon. You'll be behind your. I will say initial penetration in this position can be a little bit tricky. So you kind of need to, like, wiggle around a bit to figure it out. Your partner may need to lift up their leg. You might need to change the angles of your bodies for a second. But once you're in place, you can press your bodies close together. So you're in this really intimate, snuggling, spooning position.
Yeah. And definitely have your partner help you achieve that penetration. So this is actually the opposite of the other two. Because of the angle you're in, it tends to be a bit of a shallower penetration for you. And it can also be tough to thrust too quickly because of the way you're positioned and not wanting to slip out. And that actually makes it a lot easier to last longer because you got to go slower and it's not so deep.
All right, so those are our top three positions for men who want to last longer. If you want even more, check out our Sex positions playbook. We will link to it in the description of this video. We have 22 more positions for lasting longer, and we give really, really detailed instructions for getting into and out of each position, for exactly how to move in each position, especially if you're wanting to last longer. And even instructions for how to string different positions together into fun, sexy adventures. So we will link to that in the description box.
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