Reprodução Assistida: Mais acesso, mais escolhas. Mães que empreendem e maternam.

I often say that I love my choices. At certain times I need more intensity. At certain times I need to. I can take my foot off the gas.

And so I learned not to blame myself.

Oh, wonderful.

But the old programming of guilt remains with the new programming. Like, wow, you didn't go to the gym this week. And then I say, okay, right, okay. This is a week I'm already aware of. And another one is in my hands. I'm not going to blame anyone for that. I was the one who said yes to these commitments. Today. If we were to have a conversation in a group of friends, maybe 31 years old, someone wanting to get pregnant. My God, you're so young. You have a lot ahead of you. You have work and education, an mba, travel. These are material goods to be acquired. You can leave that for later. So today the idea has come to be that with the adv, I want.

This security, a better school, better experiences, an English course, better food, health insurance. So, yeah, experiences, right. That I believe will be great in their careers and in their lives. The second thing is to make dreams come true. So making dreams come true also made.

Me think about what closer you get. But then you can also have understanding. Yes, in the moments when you have to be absent. It's that maxim of quality. Much better than quantity. It's the quality of time, the quality, the quality of being there. The intentionality of being with your child. If you're not satisfied with your routine today, if you're not satisfied with what you're experiencing today, whether professionally, personally, or with motherhood, write. Stop write. Analyze and change course. Hi, welcome. Welcome to Interioriza. It's so good to know you're here in this special motherhood session. Guess what we're going to talk about today? Look, I'll gesture. Balance. Oh, balance. You're managing it right between your family, personal and professional needs. That's today's topic. And look who's in our cute studio. Lalasque. And I'm so glad it worked out. I'm so happy to be here with you. I hope we have an incredible chat. Lalas is the mother of three boys. And then we have Dr. Vanberto Mayafelio, a specialist in human reproduction and father of three girls. So look at the balance. Look, three boys. One there. Three boys. This way. I thought this connection was fantastic. So did I.

You?

No. Alessandra Bruno, our screenwriting advisor. What a balance. Three mothers of three boys and fathers of three girls. Let's go. Where do you want to start? I'm not sure if I should start by asking Lalas. The other day, her oldest boy asked, mom, why do you work exactly five years? Five years. Or if I should start by asking the doctor if the triplets came before or after your reproductive specialty. You're the one.

We're here now. We're here.

So let's start by asking Lalas, because this question really moved me, right? I'm the mother of a three and a half year old girl, right? By the way, guys, I'm crazy, okay? Why Angelina, right? Her oldest. I've been watching for a long time. I've been watching for a long time. It's incredible how we change, right? And it keeps changing. Like I see him saying, wow, daughter Lalas, you're the mother of three boys. Well, before we talk, okay, about how you're balancing. That's the name, right, Of a very interesting mentorship of yours. How are you balancing, right, all these areas? But your eldest came to you with a question that bothered you. I wanted you to bring it up to us.

Well, very good. First, I was going to work in that routine that we know, right? That it's intense, super calm. It's an intense routine, but it's a choice, right? So I usually say that I love my choices. At certain times I need more intensity. At certain times I need to. I can take my foot off. So this balancing of knowing where I'm important and where my importance lies is necessary. But I was there at the time, putting on a sandal on the stairs when he sat next to me and said, mom, why do you work? And there I stopped. He was 4 at the time. And I said, son, good question. I liked your question. Mommy will need to think better to explain to you why I work. Because you also ask Mommy a good question. And there, at the end of the day, I found myself sitting with a piece of paper, lit a candle and started writing. Why do I work? What is the essence of my work? Do you understand? Because I know I want to be productive. I know I want to be a better person, leave a better world. I have ideals that the world can be better every day, yes, with study, with work, with people, right? With the goodwill of one for another. But what is the essence of my work? Why am I here? What am I looking for, you know? And there I found myself arriving at three answers that make a lot of sense to me. I'm sharing that with you. The first is security for my family. So security for my parents, security for my children, security for my family, a close friends, family and the people around me. I Want this security, a better school, better experiences, an English course, better food, health insurance. So, yeah, experiences, right, That I believe will be great in their careers and in their lives. The second thing is to make dreams come true. So making dreams come true also made me think about what dreams I want to achieve. Because when we make a dream come true, we have to refresh our drive and say, okay, what's my next dream? Where do I want to look now? What do I want to achieve? So the second pillar, I work to make dreams come true. And the third, which is a grateful, grateful movement that I have today, is supporting people. So I've been an athlete my whole life, right? My career as an athlete, Joel too. Today we support swimmers. So we're there sponsoring swimmers, just like we support ideas, just like we support NGOs, so supporting people, right? In the realm of education, whether in the realm of money, whether with a word, whether with time, but supporting people. So these three things were what led me to understand, this is what I work for, this is what I wake up for in the morning. And sometimes we wake up tired, sometimes we wake up from a more intense routine, right? And say, okay, what do I work for? So these are three things. Then I'll have better energy for the day, more enthusiasm to pursue this.

Perfect. I loved it. Imagine, after that question, she spent the whole day, right, listing things, scheduled a call with the boy and said, look at this time. We'll meet then and I'll give you this answer. I want to know how you're doing, balancing all these areas. When you said Joel, it's important to mention that Lalas is the wife of Joel J. A great friend of mine. I've learned a lot, right, from him and from you over the last few years. So I'm very happy that you were able to include this episode of ours, this chat of ours, in your schedule, because I know it will also contribute to many people. And then we'll come back then, okay, define where I'm important. So where I'll dedicate myself more right away. So you'll explain it to us. And now I want to hear the following from Dr. Viberto. You started Van Berto 20 years ago, working with assisted reproduction. That's right. Okay, assisted reproduction. But 20 years ago it was one thing and now it's another.

Doubtful.

In other words, 20 years ago, there was much more prejudice, much more resistance, and it was much more expensive, and now more. What has changed in the dynamics of assisted reproduction in the last 20 years? Wow. It's changed a lot it's changed a lot. Well, when we started 20 years ago, everything was very incipient. Everything was just beginning. It was a wilderness. It really was a wilderness. Right. So we faced huge, enormous difficulties. So there was an idea and a concept that human reproduction. Everything that endorsed and referenced human reproduction. Was unattainable, expensive, and only for, well, big stars. So you only really saw people in society with high purchasing power. And things have changed. Right. So I've seen a lot of progress in the process. So today, to give you an idea. Well, there was just a news story that the United States is offering treatments at 8,000, 8,000. As if it were incredibly cheap. And today we make 4,000 here. I'm not giving 4,000. 4,000 here in Brazil. So you can do that. So we can already serve people who can achieve their dreams. Even in the lower strait of society. So simpler people, people with lower purchasing power are already receiving treatment. So today I have immense joy in serving people who 20 years ago wouldn't even dream of considering this possibility. So the main change has to do with access. Today, reproduction is more accessible, much more accessible. Access. Today you have many centers, centers of diverse types to reach various types of audiences. So you have the possibility of truly having access to everyone. When we're talking about reproduction, I'm talking about egg freezing. What am I talking about? You're talking about everything a woman needs to realize the dream of motherhood. Whether immediate or future. So when you think about 20 years ago, I was talking to my wife yesterday about how we got pregnant. She was 31. Today, if we were to have a conversation with a group of friends, maybe 31 years old, someone wanting to get pregnant. My God, you're so young. You have a lot ahead of you. You have work, education, an mba, travel, material goods to acquire. You can leave that for later. So today we have the idea that with the advancement of human reproduction, this has become increasingly possible for older ages. So today, human production is immediate pregnancy. That couple, that couple, that woman alone, independent. That man alone. Today you have human reproduction for everyone. Be it a homosexual couple, male, female, heterosexual. Yes, trans is accessibility. Today you have it for everyone. And also for planning. Okay, question mark. So if you talk to someone who wants to become a mother in the future, then not right now. And sometimes they don't even know if they want to get pregnant or not. Today you can bring all this technology to these people. In a much more accessible, widespread way. We have clinics all over the country. So it's become something that really makes a difference in women's. Lives. I'll soon want to know if triplets inspire, right? Your mom's, your dad's. Lalas, you're scary. Yes, you really are. Guys, the word depends. It depends, right? Lalas, you imagined it because you swam professionally for many years. So we call you ex athlete. Ex athlete. So, Lalas, Exactly. Besides being a businesswoman, a mother of three, a former athlete. In other words, she has and had, right? In your past life, in your last season, right? Let's share our life with your seasons, right? In your last season, right? As an athlete, did you dream of being a mother of three? How did you plan to be a mother? Did you or didn't you?

I've always dreamed of being a mother. So I say that my best, greatest, most challenging and most wonderful role is being a mother. So during swimming, right? We. Which was my adolescence and my adult life there. So I swam from the age of 10 to 26 for 16 years. I left home very young, so I left home at 15 to live in a shared apartment. To be there experiencing the whole sports environment. I was always considered everyone's big mother. So that's who I am now. So today, some of my friends send me this message when they see a video with Joao Joaquim or Pedro. They say, were you like that with us? I was the one who drove us around when we went out, right? In some sporadic moments, we'd go to a party. I was the one who went. I never drank, so I'd drive, I'd come back home. Yeah. So I've always been this mature person, you know, in all the environments I was in. So I had nephews, right? No, nephews. Sorry. I only had nephews later. But I had cousins when I was a teenager, so I was the one who took care of them. I'm a godmother to a cousin of mine. Why? Because I was so close to him that he chose me to be his godmother. So I have a sister who is 10 years younger than me. So I was the one who took care of my sister. So I think who I am today, right? I was designed to be a mother anyway. So I always wanted to be having a big family. Then three. Okay. Sometimes I think about the room. I say, okay, should I think about the room? Should I go to the room? What will it be like? But I always, always liked it. Yes. And I longed for it.

Look at my face when she says, think about the room, right?

And thinking about the room is cool. Like a. We have three boys, so there's always the question, what about the girl quote?

Yeah.

And there's a very deep conversation between Joel and I in the sense of, well, if it's a boy, will we be satisfied or will we just be hoping for a girl? So what's the scale at the moment? You know, we want one more because that's what comes. Yes, of course. That's it. But what if it's a boy, you know, and we'll want the fifth? So it's motivated by wanting another girl.

That reminded me of those families, you know, that I see on social media, that have five, six, seven boys. Right. We have someone in common, Thiago Camilo, a Brazilian Jadoka. He's the father of four girls. So when I. I see these situations, and it's not that they're twin quads. No, they were very different periods. I say, was this family trying until they got there? That's right. Now you're a mother of small children. Dr. Van Berdo is already a father of teenagers. Changing diapers is the easiest part of the trip. Right. When we say, wow, go change the diaper, guys. Changing diapers is the easy part. Exactly. Exactly. What are the challenges of balancing your career as a doctor, helping other women with raising girls who as teenagers probably have more challenges than we do? You'll get there when it comes to the challenge of adolescence, but let's get to it. I think the challenges we faced were so many that I agree changing diapers is the least of it, but I think having a partner in this evolution is very important, and not only that partnership, but also understanding where you want to go. So in the beginning, it's a means of survival. And I always joke, Lala's paid in installments. I paid in cash. She had three easy installments. I paid in cash. Right. She got there. Let's go. Well, and this challenge is a challenge that motivates you to where you want to go. So the point is what you want to pass on to your children, you want to pass on to your children absent parents who will delegate the role of motherhood, education, your culture, your knowledge, what you can pass on to them to someone who will care, or you want to participate. So we always can be both. I think you can have both. But what I don't think you can do is become absent. So you can't, in my opinion, become a father who isn't there as a father, who is only there as a provider, which perhaps was the role of others in other times, in past editions, in past chapters. So the biggest challenge for Us was really facing my wife's idea of fatherhood, of motherhood, and passing on our beliefs, our culture, our ideal of life. Right? And making this also a partnership. So changing diapers, going to the doctor, taking them out to play, going for walks, development, physical therapy. My daughters were born prematurely, so we had several responsibilities. And these had costs which we needed to have the means to cover. So we couldn't give up work, right? Yeah. And also our physical presence. So I think it was a scenario where we really closed ourselves off and we managed to do it. That this would continue to this day. Today, the challenges are greater in adolescence. Right? So we're entering another phase that I personally think is really cool. Hmm. Oh, give us a very practical example. Last year, my daughters came home one day saying, dad, we held the election. You're the coolest dad in school. I said, wow, why? Because you get there, play with everyone, know everyone's name, buy cheese, bread, play ball. Because I wanted to be involved with them. I wanted to participate. And that made me the coolest dad. Probably because many fathers are so involved with other work activities. Anyway, trips X, you know, that aren't there. And I did. Wow, I thought that was great. I'm the coolest dad, right? I won. So I thought that was really cool. So today the boys come talk to me. We have them, they're already dating, they've had boyfriends, they've already broken up. And I take them home, make burgers for everyone. And they love it. Because this is something I want to bring home. And I'm not jealous. I don't have any way. I want them to be happy, from what I understand here with you. And then I'll pass it on to Lalas to see if you agree or not. Lalas is like this. If we want balance, I need total closeness. In other words, that idea of distancing myself to do only my part will be bad. Yes, it is. The more you get interested, the closer you get. But then you can also understand.

Yes. In the moments when you have to be using it. It's that maxim of quality is much better than quantity. It's the quality of time, it's the quality of being there. It's the intentionality of being with your child. Right.

If you'll allow me. I've always said to I've done it. Look, I'm a dad, I'm not a friend. If you allow me to be a friend, we'll talk about friendship. We'll talk about the crush you had, the rejection you got. Okay? But I'll always be a dad. I have a role in your development, showing you the way, if you allow me to be there with you in this situation. And that's why I thought it was really cool to be the coolest dad in school, because I'm present in everyone's lives to the point where we get to the places where they are, they come and talk to me, uncle, uncle, come here. I don't know what. And I think that's great. It's great because I'm participating and becoming a bit of a friend to this group of people who are part of it. Very good. Look at the class there. La las for us.

No, it's totally inspiring. Right? And I think it's listening to him speak from experience. Right. Greater than ours. Right. Of raising children. Children to teenagers. Well, I'm sure, Issa, that today, right, in my therapy sessions, when I'm there with my therapist, I talk a lot. And I'm sure of what I don't want to regret. Once I'm clear that I don't want to regret, I make better decisions. So I don't want to be three years from now saying, gosh, I wish I had put my kids to bed more often. I won't have that time anymore. Exactly. So if I know today what I don't want to regret three years from now, I do it today. So I'm intentional in parenting. I have the perspective that I'm a father, a mother, Right. Well, I have a need to pass on all this parenting to my children. And if I have the opportunity to be friends, even better, because I'm friends with my parents. I've always been friends with my parents, and I was, too. Why? Because they were there. They were interested. They were with me all the time. They were there in the good moments, in the moments when things were tough, they pushed me, they showed me the way. So it's really good to hear and say, well, this is where I want to go. This is where I want to go, too. And know that it's possible. Right. I think that's the most interesting thing.

Is there a time, Lalas, during the day when you get so tired that you have to. At what point do you stop? Is it only in therapy that you stop to realign your path? What. What needs to happen for you to say, hey, stop there. If I'm making a mistake, I have to make a mistake quickly. Let me correct that right now. Well, I'm a person who has learned to apply the right criticism in my life.

Hmm. So at certain times, Well, I have it very well established today. When I'm at home, I'm at home. When I'm at work, I'm at work. When I'm with my husband, I'm with my husband. So within my intense routine, I manage to establish what I want to be at that moment. And then when that look comes up. Is there something that's out of alignment? Can I improve here? It's the moments when I'm at lunch, when I'm present. So I'm present with myself. I was joking with you. Right. I was doing my makeup, and I said, wow, how amazing to be able to do my makeup and think about myself. Exactly. You know, I'm doing what needs to be done, but I'm able to think about myself. So every day we're putting ourselves more on, right. That saying, the oxygen mask falls first on you and then on the other, which is something you say. So. Well, Issa, yes, it's very necessary at certain times. Some mothers, especially mothers of young children, will think it's not possible. But yes, it is possible. You need to seek it, and you'll only find it if you seek it. If you look right, I saw you say once that the cure is in the search, and it's within the word search. And that's exactly it. If you're not satisfied with your routine today, if you're not satisfied with what you're experiencing today, whether professionally, personally, or with motherhood. Right. Stop write, analyze and change course and be available. I think life is a change of course. Right. It's a change of course for those who want to get pregnant but can't. It's for those who have idealized a career but have to change careers. Right. So an illness. An illness that appears. Right.

Hey la las. If there's one certainty in life and it's uncertainty. Exactly. That's it. Wonderful. If there's one certainty, it's uncertainty. Oh, guys, I have to stay here. Look, with so many questions, looking at time, you talked about choices, and so I just want to share a statement here. I think that we, as mothers, or right in maturity, even if you're not a mother yet, but are here with us. We have to be clear that this is for now. So, for example, this week that we're recording, I'm having a more demanding week.

Yeah, yeah.

Because the previous week was different. The following week, I already know I'll have more time to get my massage to work out. So I've learned not to blame myself.

Oh, wonderful.

But the old guilt program remains with the new program, like, wow, you didn't go to the gym this week. And then I say, okay, right, okay. This is a week I'm already aware of, and another one is in my hands. Exactly. I'm not going to blame anyone for this. I was the one who said yes to these commitments. Yeah. And we don't need to keep asking for help. Because when you're constantly talking about your schedule to people, it's your unconscious asking for help. Yeah, but if you're the one who chose.

Exactly. Love your choices.

Love your choices. When you have the opportunity to choose, choose better. Exactly. Exactly. Next time. Right, right. Redo. Redo the roots. Now speaking, then moving towards our conclusion.

I think that's the most interesting thing.

Is there a time? Lalas Duranjen. But with the beginning of our conversation. Doctor, does the fact that you're a father of tremeis inspire more women to want this model? How much does your own experience make your work easier? Look, I'll tell you again. We have to. Everything we go through in science, you have a model that is what we call your knowledge. Your knowledge will guide you where you're going, but it has low resolution, so you need more robust scientific data. So my experience is that having triplets gives me empathy. In the day, when you get so tired that you have to. At what point do you stop? Is it only in therapy that you stop to realign your path? What. What needs to happen for you to say, great. It allows me to know. To know where it hurts at that point that made you understand the other person. So we often see a lot of movies, right? Many depictions of doctors in rude. Hey, stop there. If I'm making a mistake, I have to make a mistake quickly. Let me correct that right now. Well, I'm a person who has learned to apply the right criticism in my life.

Hmm. So at certain times. Well, I have it very well established today. When I'm at home, I'm at home. When I'm at work, I'm at work. When I'm with my husband, I'm with my husband. So within my intense routine, I managed to establish what I want to be at that moment. And then when that look comes up, Is there something that's out of alignment? Can I improve here? It's the moments when I'm at lunch, when I'm present. So I'm present with myself. I was joking with you. Right. I was doing my makeup, and I said, wow, how amazing to be able to do my makeup and think about myself. Exactly. You know, I'm doing what needs to be done, but I'm able to think about myself. So every day we're putting ourselves more on. Right. That saying, the oxygen mask falls first on you and then on the other, which is something you say. So. Well, yes, it's very necessary at certain times. Some mothers, especially mothers of young children, will think it's not possible. But yes, it is possible. You need to seek it. And you'll only find it if you seek it. If you look right, I saw you say once that the cure is in the search and it's within the word search. And that's exactly it. If you're not satisfied with your routine today, if you're not satisfied with what you're experiencing today, whether professionally, personally, or with motherhood, write, stop, write, analyze and change course and be available. I think life is a change of course. Right. It's a change of course for those who want to get pregnant but can't. It's for those who have idealized a career but have to change careers. Right. So an illness. An illness that appears. Right.

Hey, Lalas. If there's one certainty in life, it's uncertainty. Exactly. That's it. Wonderful. If there's one certainty, it's uncertainty. Oh, guys, I have to stay here. Look, with so many questions, looking at time, you talked about choices. And so I just want to share a statement here. I think that we, as mothers, or right in maturity, even if you're not a mother yet, but are here with us. We have to be clear that this is for now. So, for example, this week that we're recording, I'm having a more demanding week.

Yeah, yeah.

Because the previous week was different. The following week I already know I'll have more time to get my massage to work out. So I've learned not to blame myself.

Oh, wonderful.

But the old guilt program remains with the new program. Like, wow, you didn't go to the gym this week. And then I say, okay, right, okay. This is a week I'm already aware of and another one is in my hands. Exactly. I'm not going to blame anyone for this. I was the one who said yes to these commitments. Yeah, and we don't need to keep asking for help. Because when you're constantly talking about your schedule to people, it's your unconscious asking for help. Yeah, but if you're the one who chose.

Exactly. Love your choices.

Love your choices. When you have the opportunity to choose, choose better. Exactly, exactly. Next time. Right? Redo. Redo the roots. Now speaking, then moving towards our conclusion, but with the Beginning of our conversation. Doctor, does the fact that you're a father of Tremeus inspire more women to want this model? How much does your own experience make your work easier? Look, I'll tell you again. We have to. Everything we go through in science, you have a model that is what we call your knowledge. Your knowledge will guide you where you're going, but it has low resolution. So you need more robust scientific data. So my experience is that having triplets gives me empathy. Great. It allows me to know. To know where it hurts at that point that made you understand the other person. So we often see a lot of movies, right? Many depictions of doctors in rude, crude, kind of like that, you know, and several movies that I could even give here as advice. Exactly. From people who have changed along this path. I've never been that person. I've always been very empathetic. But the fact that I had to go through what my master was challenging and generates empathy in people, he understands what I'm going through, for better or for worse. Because people think that the fact that I have tremors is a wonderful thing, is a dream come true. Quite the contrary. It's desperate, it's very complicated. It's all intense. Everything experienced at the same time. So I also share the other side of what it's like to have many children, which is the difficulty, the good side and the bad side. Because if everything in life we had were only good, there would be no choice. I would just go that way and it would be easy. In other words, Dr. Vumberto has four women there, look by his side all the time, whom I love passionately and who make my life wonderful. But again, I think this side of having gone through the problem of infertility, of having been with my wife by my side, living with the good and the bad there, nagging at his judgment to do what he shouldn't, what he shouldn't do. So this gives patience, whoever hears this story, the understanding that he knows what he's doing. Because if I talk about training, about how he trained, what it was like, she knows what it was like to wake up at 5am in the cold or in an unheated pool, she knows so she can talk about what it was like to go through that. So I think it creates a connection. A connection. Right. Perfect. Perfect. It's empathy. Lalas already has four men on her back. I'm the queen of the house. Oh, how wonderful. Hey, Lalas, you, because like your youngest, he's born very close to the middle. Yes. He's a Year and two months. In fact, I saw you pregnant, expecting Pedro. Yeah, with Joaquin, who wasn't even a year old. Who wasn't even a year old. How was it? Was it. God, did you already know it would be like this? How was it? No, we wanted to have more children. Right from the moment we had two, we had already talked about wanting another child or two.

And so it was always like a compromise between three and four children. Right, Joo? Vicente was very calm. He was born, the pregnancy was super calm. I had all three very calm pregnancies. Issa and Zhuavi Sente. Besides having a very calm pregnancy, when he was born on the first, second day, third, he was already sleeping for three hours. He was. And I cried.

That's easy, right? Easy. Tell me what you did.

Yeah. And there and there, like, super calm and all. So I breastfed until a year and a half ago. I spent the entire pandemic with him. Then he was born in 2019. I spent the entire pandemic there, just me and him. I had like, an incredible moment because we were at home. Wonderful. It was a different time. A different time because you didn't have to juggle being a businesswoman. During the pandemic, we stayed at home more. That's it, Issa. And there, when I decided to stop breastfeeding for a year and a half ago, in the transition from stopping breastfeeding to stopping breastfeeding to stopping breastfeeding, I got pregnant with Joaquim. We already wanted it. Okay, Perfect. Wonderful. Joaquin came. He was born in October. Joaquin was already waking up every hour. He woke up every hour, every 40 minutes. He just wanted to be at the breast the whole time. He would nurse for like 10 minutes and then fall asleep, so I had to keep waking up. He wanted him to breastfeed more because he would then sleep for half an hour, 40 minutes, and wake up again. So I spent the first five months, like, do I need a night nanny to help me? Do I give him formula? No, I'm not giving him formula. I'll want to breastfeed because I had a lot of milk. So a lot, a lot, a lot of milk. And then there were those doubts. And then when he was five months old, he found out I was pregnant. When I found out I was pregnant with Pedro, initially it was like, oh, my God, if he comes, like, Joaquim, what am I going to do? I'm going to die, right? Like, I haven't slept in five months. So it was a very challenging time. And my doctor said, lalas thank you. Because there are many women who can't get pregnant. And you had a gift that was unintentional. You got pregnant. And that changed my way of saying, okay, it's a blessing. And we joke that Pedro, right, Because Joo is one way, Joaquin is another. Pedro thought and said, what if they don't want it? I'll go right away. You know, I'm going to be born, sort it out here. I came anyway, because otherwise I might not want to. And it's a real question. I don't know if when I had a moment of choice whether we're going to have a third or not, I would want to have a third, you know? Yeah. So I didn't even have to think about it. And then the third one came along.

And then the third one. How did you find out you were pregnant? Well, who realized you were pregnant later? How did you confirm it? I was coming back from Joaquin's bronchiolitis. Five months, he had bronchiolitis. He was hospitalized for four days. Joel. We were eating eggs. Issa. I was eating eggs. Everyone was eating eggs. Joel looked at me and said, are you pregnant?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I just did it and did it like this. I didn't even have the strength to do anything. I did it like this and kept eating eggs. And then when I went to the pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test, to buy antibiotics for bronchiolitis, bronchitis, I found myself in line there in the pharmacy aisle with a pregnancy test. We even have clear blue here, which you'll know later. Clear blue. And that's what appears there, Right? Wonderful. I said something like a good Scorpio. I said, I'm going to take this test just to rub it in Joel's.

Face that he's wrong.

That he's wrong. What do you mean? I'm pregnant. There's no way I'm pregnant. Right. I was breastfeeding, uh, exclusively. I hadn't menstruated yet. I was taking some medication there to avoid, uh, the chance of getting pregnant. And then I took the test and gave it to Joel, like we did with everyone. I didn't look at any of the tests. I always gave it to him, and he started laughing. When he started laughing, I sat on the floor and started crying. That's how it was. I went there. He was, like, jumping with Shihuao like that. Jumping with Joaquim, like, five months back from the hospital, he was jumping like that. I said, it's not possible. It's not possible. Like, what's going to happen. You understand? I won't be able to. Exactly. And that's how we found out, Pedro. It was exactly like that, but wonderful. I am in love with my family. I was born to be a mother. And the most wonderful thing in the world.

I only find this story funny because my wife wanted to have two children. So I said to her, no, tell me. Then she said, I want to have two children. A couple. Is that okay? I said, no, we're going to have three girls. Look, look. I said, I dated my wife for 10 years. She started. She was 15 when we started dating. He said, I want to have three girls. And I said, the name will be X, Y, Z. She said, never. You're going to have you two boys. I'm. You were laughing here, internally laughing, because when we did the treatment, and at the time we put three embryos. We could put three embryos. And I said to her, she makes love. Putting three embryos is not a lot. I said, shut up. Maybe it's me. It's less than 1% of. And then I remember the scene you were talking about the egg. I remember the scene where we did an ultrasound to find out how many there were. And then they did the ultrasound. There were three little bags. And someone who was with us came out of the room. Then she was putting on the clothes. She stopped in the middle. It was 1%, right? And then I stayed quiet. It was supposed to be. And it was exactly three girls. Then I said, look, I have an agreement with the man upstairs. We talk a lot, don't argue. It's not like that. No, this one was supposed to be wonderful. And when you mentioned clear blue la las in both my pregnancies, I said, hmm, it's something I felt. I fell. So much so that I even spoke to Dr. Andre Vinicius. I had done tests like that before. Now, with the second pregnancy with Antonio, I had done tests. I read the tests. And there was a number there. I sent it and said, Dr. Andre, I'm pregnant. She said, what's up, friend? You're like, I don't know what? Lol. This is nothing. Well, I went to the pharmacy, got a test, did the test. Doctor, look here, Doctor, do you think this test is wrong? Look. Then Tiago went to the pharmacy, went to the pharmacy. It was the same as Angelina. We take what comes out, only the approximately. Then he takes what shows weeks. Then when he takes the week's test, then I say, andre, my love, look how good it is for us to know each other. It is right and then for women who always ask me, but how did you manage to get pregnant at 43? Because when you experience self love, you can generate love. This is a construction. This doesn't happen overnight. I'm like, I would just like to pass on a message to women before I end. Be very careful with those phrases you hear about, oh, after 40, it's difficult. Or that eggs age. This is a fact. The cells, they get older. But if you think you can, your chances will increase. If you think you can't and you're already past 40, you won't get pregnant anymore. You might not be able to. So obviously science and medicine show that as you get older, your chances decrease. But that's not a sentence. I want to emphasize that there are many distressed women who are unable to get pregnant. Why, doctor? Because they've been hearing for 10, 20 years that they can't. Okay, so to wrap things up, I wanted to ask Lalas what you do for yourself. What are your hobbies to help you be firm in your decisions.

Well, I've been doing, right, the sports part, so it's for my mind, right? I'm a former athlete. I have a whole cellular memory, let's say. And I look for running, yoga, Pilates, I look for weights, you know, at times when I think that's what will take me to my sanity. So I don't have one thing that I do like. I like to run. So I go to the park to run, I run in the condominium, I leave the house and run in the streets of the condominium. So I'm always on the move. I think that's one point. And when I bring this to the networks, some women say, wow, no one told me that. I thought I had to be there doing the same thing. I don't like the same thing. So find what you like, what you enjoy, what suits you. There are certain moments. There was a time when I went to CrossFit and stayed at CrossFit regularly in the same class at the same time. Today it's no longer part of my daily routine. So look for it. You have to move. Of course, we have to do it constantly. We have to get started and send this message to your brain that I'm going to start and I'm not going to stop because of the moment, the environment. I'm going to do a year of this thing, go out there and do it. Fulfill the agreements you made with yourself. But sports are my escape valve. Cool. A I really like painting too. And now it's amazing because I'M painting with my kids, so I'm drawing every day. We're buying, right? Several sketchbooks, free drawings. So it's a moment where I'm with them, and it's really good for me. So it's a hobby I really like. Gardening. I really like it. So it's something I go to my backyard, work on the plants. I'm thriving right next to making arrangements, making bouquets. It's something I like. And cooking, which I call my kitchen, my therapeutic kitchen. So in those moments when I need to lower my energy, I'll make my dinner, I'll prepare my food. And I know that the intentionality of what I do there will be directly reflected in my children. So I have to have the best, my best moment, my best feeling to put love there. You know, cooking with love. That's exactly what I do.

And intentionality has to do with presence. So you are present in the things you are doing.

Isa, why does the milk boil and spill on the stove? Because you are doing something else at.

The same time, because you are not looking.

So that's it. The milk will only boil and spill on the stove if you are not looking. So how many things are you bringing into your life? As if it were milk that is in the kettle, spilling on the stove. We don't need to live like this, right? We have to be present.

And then when the milk spills, you still complain, oh, I'm going to have to clean the stove now.

Exactly. Exactly.

Beautiful. Beautiful. So, doctor, to wrap up, what tools do you use as a father of triplets? And what do you recommend? Right. To other families, to balance. Right. Your schedule in the office, your schedule at home, and the schedule with you. These three schedules, how do you organize them? I was hearing here saying, my God, if I did all that, thank goodness I only have an aquarium. My hobby is aquariums. I even have about 300 baby fish at home. I'm super happy. Look, I think we need to. I thought this idea of milk was fantastic. Like, if you're not looking, that's why it spills. I really thought that was fantastic. I think people need to look at themselves. People need to value themselves and understand where they're going so they can know what they want. So in human reproduction, it's about fulfillment. It's about fulfilling a desire. Motherhood is now optional. So you'll certainly find many women who chose not to have a child, others who made that choice and regret it. We end up finding this in various podcasts, talking about exactly this. I think what we need is to look within, to know what you have and where you want to go. So, as a father of trembling babies, I want their path to be the best possible, that I'm present and that I help them recognize themselves on this journey. So I'll never be someone who guides them on this path. I want them to accept themselves, understand themselves, and truly fulfill this dream of growing up. And I say the same thing to my patients. Look within themselves for what they want and we'll be there to guide them. As a coach, and I say this often, as a doctor, I'm a coach. I guide where the play should go, how to close the defense, whether to sprint. But the athlete is the one who executes. The athlete is the one who will make the decision. So I try to do exactly that. I try to guide them so they make the best possible decision. Very good. But what about you? For me, I look, I love Aquarius. So what makes me. Someone is watching my Pisces. I use my former life as an athlete. No, My God, if I could have achieved that, I achieved it. But I don't stop. I also always comment on my videos not to get fit, but to heal myself, to look for the problems life will give me. Because as you said yourself, we will age if others age. So we need to have that. And aging is a privilege, not an accident. Right? Your page, doctor. For people to follow you, Vanberto Maya everywhere. Vanberto Maya on Instagram. Ah, on all social media. There you go. So for women who are considering assisted reproduction, to exchange ideas, write about how, how much, what planning needs to be done, you can reach out? Absolutely. We have a very, very active channel with many followers and we have people there every day talking and asking a wide variety of questions. So only Vanberto Maya will reach out to me.

Perfect.

Lalas, you know I love you. Oh, thank you. I admire you. I respect you. It's been years, right? So every time I see Lalas, I ask you what I ask you. Are you resting? Wonderful. Hey, Lara, Are you resting? Resting. There you are, resting. But if you'll excuse me, I heard your husband talking about a text he sent you about you being tired. So my family is. Well, that's exactly it. That's why you're resting. I thought that text was amazing. Keep that one I kept for myself. Okay, I kept it for myself.

I didn't see it. Then you. He went. I participated in the JJ podcast. Podcast. In the final message, he read a message he sent me at five in the morning. That's it. And there, after the Message which was beautiful. I replied to him, like, thank you for seeing me.

That's it. Thank you for seeing me. And there he was. It was really beautiful. Because in the end. That's it. Yeah, Yeah.

I gave him a thumbs up. Right? Because we're like that. But then I wrote, thank you for seeing me because, like, it's not always easy, right, Issa? It's usually challenging, but we choose our battles like that.

We choose our paths. Right? Hello. And so for the women who are following us, want to do your mentoring, want to follow you more. So in this day to day on Instagram, at Lalashesla, there will be content every day showing my real routine. Right. My day to day. And you're all very welcome to be there. Oh, how beautiful. Thank you for your time. I know. I can only imagine what she left behind. How many activities, how many demands. Right. You delegated to be here. So thank you so much for your time, Doctor too, thank you to Emma Fiores, who is keeping me here. Super elegant. Guys, think about it. It's not easy to get dressed. Imagine being pregnant and appearing on stage or in a show. Right? So, Emma, thank you. Clear blue. Always giving us security. Right? In this doubt, am I pregnant? Am I not? Take the test, you'll be calm. Oh, no, Isabella, I don't want to get pregnant. Take the ovulation test to see if you can go out partying like this anymore. Look. Yay. Or not. Hold on. Okay. And also thanks to Priscilla Pacifico, Joo Butler and Sanho's Gennar for this cute setting.

It's cute.

It's not cute. It's cute. And welcome to the blue world of boys.

That's right, guys. Dr. Doesn't know. Dr. Doesn't know what it is. But Issa will definitely manage. Absolutely. I have no doubt.

Look, I'll talk to someone else. You can create it. She has no idea. Girl, just put on a team jersey, a pair of girls shorts, everything. No, I already have a girl. Right now I'm going to have a boy. And I'm like, LA LA's. I'll definitely make it. You'll definitely be free.

And look how wonderful. God is that when he starts, he starts easy, just changing a diaper, you know, and then you go. The levels increase. Right. And it's a video game. Exactly. So we don't have a degree in motherhood or fatherhood, but as we grow, we improve every day.

The phases are like a video game phase. They get harder and harder. Right. For those who played Mario, right. At our age, there. It's the same. Thank you again. If you've followed us this far, you've certainly had fun and been moved. There will be others, you know, who you care about, who will probably benefit from this content. Please share it with others so we can spread the word. Thank you again. Until next time. Special Maternity interior design. This episode is sponsored by Clear Blue, a PG brand.