What I Learned From Being Bullied - Kevin Ward

Hi there. It's Kevin Ward, the founder of yes Masters Real Estate Success Training. And I want to ask you, do you remember the first time you were ever bullied? And some of you may feel like you've never been bullied before and others have. You can, with vivid clarity, go. I remember exactly the first day I was bullied. For me, it was my first day of third grade. We had just moved to a brand new school, and I was so excited because it was just an opportunity to get to meet new kids, new town. I had a brand new pair of glasses my parents had just gotten for me. And I remember I was out on the playground there in Anson, Texas, Anson Elementary School. And a kid walked up to me that I'd never seen before. And he had this real thick, bushy blonde hair that looked like it hadn't been probably ever combed. And he just walked up to me and he said, hey, want to fight? And I had no idea how to respond to that. I'd never had a kid threaten me before. And I'm like, no. And he said, well, I do. And without any warning, he just jumped me and literally started beating the crap out of me. He grabbed me and he just started punching me and pushing me. And then he grabbed me in the headlock and he's just punching me and punching me, and I'm just totally paralyzed in fear. I had no idea what to do, how to react or anything. And I'm just. I'm taking it. And I can just remember this sense of terror, like, what's going to happen? And finally he let go. I finally got away from him. And I just remember looking down on the ground and seeing my glasses and reaching down and grabbing my brand new glasses, and they were broken. And I grabbed my glasses and I just ran away as fast as I could. The main thing I was afraid of after I got away was I was afraid I was going to get in trouble from my parents for breaking my glasses because they were expensive. And I knew that would. I was afraid my parents would be mad at me for that. And when I got home, my mom, she was totally cool. And I just remember my mom, she sat me in her lap and she put her arm around me, and I'm just sobbing like crazy. And she told me it was okay about the glasses, they could be fixed and it was going to be okay. And then she told me, and you did the right thing to not fight back. That's what she told me. She said, you just turn the other cheek and kids like buddy will leave you alone. Now, if you've ever been bullied, then you know that turning the other cheek is not the way to get kids to leave you alone. But that was what I was taught, and so that's what I did. And so my whole life, all the way through school, I was bullied. I mean, from third grade on. And in third grade it was Buddy. In fourth and fifth grade, it was Colin. In sixth grade, it was Greg Hughes. In seventh grade it was Santos. Seventh and eighth grade, it was a guy named Dean Stalder and Santos Garcia. Santos had been my best friend in third grade. But by eighth grade, he decided I was. Well, I can't say all the names he called me, but I got bullied by him. My sophomore year was. My sophomore and junior year was Raul Lara. And Raul was probably the most violent that I was ever. And he would punch me every day in the locker room. And I just took it. And I can remember feeling so ashamed because I wouldn't. Couldn't stand up for myself. And I would just try to avoid him every chance I could and try to come in a different door, go out a different way. And it was horrible. And when I grew up, you would think that the bullying would stop. But here's what happened to me. What happened to me was when you approach life that way, that you can't stand up for yourself, that you can't fight back. Whenever you're confronted, whenever there's stuff, what happens is you get the feeling you start believing that you're not worth fighting for, that you're not worth standing up for. And all of a sudden that became the way I approach life. And so I would always do great at stuff. I would always be successful until. Until there was a conflict, until there was confrontation or there was adversity. I was always awesome. And the moment there was adversity, the moment there was some conflict, I was gone. I just ran and hided. I wasn't willing to stand up for myself. And I always wanted to be, you know, successful. I always wanted to win in life. And I would always do great again. I would always start out being successful. And then when something would happen, it would all, like, seem to fall apart. And I was. I've always looked at that and gone like, why can't I break through this? And it finally, after 30, 40 years, over 30 years later, it finally occurred to me one day, you can't win if you won't fight. And I realized that the only way I was ever going to win is if I finally decided that I was worth standing up for and that I was worth fighting for. And you're worth fighting for. And I want to ask you today, when was the last time you were bullied? When was the last time that you were actually bullied? Do you remember it? I'll bet it was more recently than you think because most of you. In fact, I did this on a Facebook livestream recently and I was asking people, I asked them, what were you taught about bullies? And most of the people were taught whenever you stand up for yourself, you fight back. You, you know, if they come at you, you fight. You stand up for yourself. And so most of you were taught to stand up to the bullies. You were taught to stand up to bullies, especially when it was other kids. But here's what I'm not sure about. I think most of us were not taught to stand up to the inner bullies. I believe that most people that I've ever met and talked to, I know they were not taught to stand up to the bullies that stood between them and their dreams, that they were not taught. They were, they were in a sense taught not to fight for their dreams, not to stand up against the bullies of fear. And see, this is the biggest bullies of all. It's not the external bullies. It's not the mean kids in school. Those are tough and they're real and they're. And it's brutal for kids and it, you know, can do great damage to your self worth. But the greatest bullies of all are the inner. They're the inner bullies, the internal bullies that make us afraid. It's the inner bullies of fear of self doubt. It's the inner bullies of limit our limiting beliefs, our past failures, our fear of failure. And those are the inner bull. Those inner bullies are the ones that we see it. We go, oh no. And we run away and we run away from our dreams because we have a dream, we want something. We think, I can do this. And then boom, that inner bully shows up and says, who are you kidding? You're not good enough to do that. You're not smart enough. You don't have enough knowledge. You're too new, you're too young, you're too old. You're not pretty enough. You don't have the advantages. You don't have enough experience. Right? You can't afford it. You're not enough. And it's those inner bullies that beat us up for a whole life. And today I want to challenge you to just stop Step back and look and say, do I let myself get bullied? Not by other people, not by the kids, the tough kids at school, but do you let yourself get bullied by your fears? Do you let it? Do you let your limiting beliefs and your doubts bully you and say, well, I used to want that but I just decided that wasn't realistic. Really? Did you decide it wasn't realistic or did the inner bully of fear go like, you can't have it and you go like, okay, if you say so. And we accept our limiting beliefs, we accepted our fear as reality, as final, as something we couldn't stand up against. And I want to tell you that most of the dreams that you have in your life, the reason you don't have them is because you let the inner bullies push you around and you said okay and you ran away and you hid from your dreams. That's what happened to me. Happened to me. It's happened to me for most of my life until I finally realized what was happening and I went like, that's it. You are enough. You are powerful enough. You are good enough. And it is your time to stand up and fight for your dreams. Stand up against the inner, the inner bully. Stand up against the fear. Stand up against the limiting beliefs. Stand up against those self doubts. You're still going to have them. When they happen. Don't ignore them, acknowledge them and say, I hear you, come on. And you kick your fears. But that's what you do. That limiting belief you got that makes you say, I'm not enough or I can't afford it or it's too late or I'm not, I'm too old or I'm past my prime or I'm not technologically tech savvy enough. Whatever those little things are, those are the inner bullies that are stopping you from having the lifestyle of your dreams. It's time to stand up the bullies. It's time to take charge of your life, to fight for your dreams and to win. If this video is powerful for you, if this helps you, if you know anybody else this would help, please give it a thumbs up, share it with somebody you know. It's your time play to win.