Energetic Life Now: Coach Ambereen ~ Role Modeling through Energy

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Good morning, good afternoon, good evening and welcome friends and family from around the world to the energetic Life now show. So glad you guys are tuning in or catching a replay. Just sending out some good love, good vibes, warm energy, sunshine, peace, love and goodness to you and your families wherever you are on this beautiful, amazing spinning rock in the universe. Hey, just thanks for tuning in today. And we are on and broadcasting live on the Spanglish world and her networks which is on Xingo TV, channel 250 and 251. Now if you're not on Xingo TV and you don't have the app downloaded yet, don't sweat it, no big deal. You can go ahead and download that or on your iOS or Android devices. It is free. And, and that's like, that's always a nice thing. Like we love free apps. Xingu TV is also available on the cool old Google Chromecast, Amazon Fire, Fire sticks, Roku Roku sticks on all smart TVs 2016 and forward. So tonight, you guys know how I roll. The best of the best and nothing less. And I want to welcome back to the energetic Life now show my dear friend, coach and colleague, Coach Umbrem. Coach Umbreem. What's shaking? How are you?

I am so, so, so happy to be here. Thank you so very much for having me over again. Eric is one of my favorite people on this network, to be honest with you. You know, I think he lives into. I really was making an intention right now, so the broader intention, you know, for those of you who've seen my show and who know how I roll, it's a very intention driven day. And so it was like, I have a reflection day. Just reflect. And I was like, well, let me reset my intention on my drive, you know, to see you. And I was like, yeah, I just want to serve him up. He's just like, just love and fun and let's do this. Let's do this.

Heck yeah. Heck yeah. Well, I'm just, I'm so glad you're back. And we always have a great, great conversation and great time together and love how much we align in our philosophies and mindsets and principles and values. And I think that's, that's a great thing to draw people together on. And so I just thank you from the bottom of my heart for being here. So listen, tonight I thought we would talk a little bit about, you know, being an adult and we were cracking up before the show started. As we were in the, in the, in the green room, we, we're cracking up at our kids, right? Because we got stories about our kids and, and all the shenanigans that kids love to pull and the imaginations, the dreams, the spaces that they get into and that, you know, sometimes for us as adults, we begin to lose some of that, I don't know what we call it, that childlike faith and belief and operation. And we get to a certain age and we start hearing, you know, oh, it's time for you to, you know, grow up. It's time for you to be more mature. This and this and when that, that continues to build through our teens and young adult years and, and then we find ourselves somewhere down the path where it's like, man, I'm an adult and I may have lost some of my.

Fun or.

You know, like Austin Powers lost his mojo. I lost my, I lost my, my vitality because I get so sucked into the day to day operations of life that I forget to have fun as an adult. And so I thought we would go into that space tonight because I know you and I, we are both fun, fun waiting to happen. We don't even need to wait for a green light. It's there. At any given moment, we are fun and we are jumping in. But at the same time, I, I think it, I think it's something that, that we as adults can, can talk about. Like we, we pour so much into our lives and our families and our kids and whatnot, that, you know, where, where, where's, where's the fun? Are, are we still.

I think the most important thing is when we have that. And the, to be honest with you, the first video I ever created in my whole entire life and kind of like launched into this, you know, universe of creation mode. It was literally be a childlike leader. So I distinguished the two words. Childish is when you're being immature, throwing those fits on, those tantrums, unable to really, you know, control your emot. Just a place of reaction. Whereas childlike is what you're talking about. That, the creativity, the curiosity, the spontaneity, the presence. And that's what the kids give to us. You know, I, I'm a family driven coach by profession and I always remind the parents, can you like just, just chill? I understand you have responsibilities, but can you live a little? Yeah, you know, because every single one of these kids, and this is my true faith, you know, and you'll probably hear me talk about this often, is they come to teach us something, these little beings, they teach us to have more, just enjoy life a little Bit more not to take stress over everything. Yeah, the bills got to be paid. But you know what? Your seven year old does not care. Yeah, they just, you didn't care when you were seven. Why put that stress on them? Why would you dispose your negative energy onto them? Because we talk about this all the time. You know, in my own philosophy, in my own work is you gotta role model everything that you do through energy. So why not become more fun and they, who knows, maybe they'll like you a little bit more.

Yeah, I, you know what, I am so glad to hear you say that because I, I think that's so, so true. Right. We so bogged down in really the mundane of life, the minutia and, and the scheduling and going from, you know, everything is tied to the clock and, and we don't have a whole lot of wig room. And, and I know you and I both, when working with kids, teens and families, you know, we hear this too, is like I, especially from the kids, like, I don't know who my parents are anymore. Like, I remember we used to go to the park and I remember we used to do this and we used to do that and, and now it's like, I don't, like we're so busy, we just have, we don't do these things anymore. And, and it makes me wonder like, where along the way did we as the adults lose that ability to really pour into the presence that's needed to be there for, like you said, being there for the kids and meeting them in that childlike space and just having that time to go back myself into that childlike state, that inner child, to hey, let's play cars, let's play toys, let's do this, let's do that. And we lose some of that creativity.

I think when you ask that question, the first thought that comes to mind and I kind of asked like, hey, is this the right thing? I want to say, yeah, responsibilities. We get so caught up in our responsibilities that we forget to enjoy the journey of life. You know, we get so caught up in adulting and being adults that we, we forget to dream and to play and to have fun and to really go back and align yourself. Like, so I'm 40 years old, right, and I play volleyball with 20 year olds and I crush it. I whoop them. And so it's so fun. One day I go to a brand new league and I'm playing and they're. These two friends have known each other forever. They're saying, and I think these two are maybe in their late 20s, early 30s, if so. And she's like, hey, I'm Brain, right? And I was like, yeah, nice to meet you. She's like, yeah, well, like, you're. You're so good. You're so good. And I was like, oh. Oh, thank you. So she's like, it's like, do you, like, play professionally? And I said, do I play professionally? I'm like, this is as professional as it gets, right? Like, this is all of us humans who've got lives, who have families, who take out, like, an hour to two hours on a week, on a weekday to say, you know what? I'm gonna go have some fun. I'm gonna go, like, see really what I can pour into. And I was like. She was like, tournaments. And like. And I was like, girl, I got three kids. And she's like. She literally went back four steps. Excuse me? And she goes, no. And she. Look at him. Like, no, no. I was like, no, no, I have three kids. Yeah, no, we would have never thought so. Like. And. And then she does this, like, with the hands, like, like really tiny little humans. And I was like, no, no, like, well above me, right? And what I said to her was like. And I said, I'm 40 years old. And she goes, I. I don't believe you. And I think it's this concept that I will always, always, always stay true to, which is so authentically me. And I know it's about true about you, too. And any one of you who does not lock up the inner child. The inner child, that. That's. That per. That thing that fuels you. Let's say you're somebody who, back in the day, when you were younger, you used to. Used to draw, or you just color, or you used to just be creative and come up with random games that made. No, like, in my. In my daughter's words, nonsense. They made nonsense. But you created them. We really go back in, I think, as adults, and we forget to imagine. And we forget to imagine. We forget to create. We forget to create. We can't play. We can't have fun. And then it's all about the checklist. So something simple, right? Like, let's say your kiddos in dance class, okay? Or another one is in soccer class if you're not present, if you're not engaged, if you're still trying to hit a checklist. And I am one to raise my hand and say, yeah, I've been there, done that. I'm like, let me get done with, like, this task while, like, what? And my kid Said something really, you know, very. Not like, very passively. Yeah. Ma is like, you know, you were, you were reading a book and I was like, oh, oh. I was physically there, but mentally we tap out. And Eric, you and I both know as kids, they are so present, they are so engaged that you can, you and I can feel it through our energy the same exact way you and I will spontaneously talk and crack up. It's just through this engagement and this beautiful thing of they role model to us through their energy, whereas we adults only role model responsibility and we give them like the short end of the energy stick.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's, it's. That's, that's so true. You know, and, and I love what you said a minute ago. Like, you know, yeah. I remember the days going to the soccer field when, when, when Emerson was playing club and you know, what can I combine in those moments? Yes. It's checking the box off and be responsible. So while she's doing her. I would go and do mine. And then there was times of which I said, hey, let's. Let's go down the street to the park and, and let's. Let's go watch the sunset because we've got, you know, the, the bluffs are right here. And so we look out over the Pacific Ocean and, and can watch the sunset every night. It's gorgeous. And you know, it's like, it doesn't take a lot of time when you invest in doing something fun together and collectively that you're meeting the needs of your kids and also meeting your inner child needs. Like, like, like you're saying that it can, it can benefit both, like sit down and playing Legos with the kids and, and building stuff or coloring. Right. And you know, I love that they have adult coloring books now. And I love, I love, I love those. I, that is such a great way for I, I love it because it's a de. Stress for me just, you know, just coloring and, and doing that. You know, what, what activities can you. Friends and family around the world can you engage? Simple things. You don't have to, like, it doesn't have to be things that cost money. Like you can do things, things in and around your home, in your neighborhood, or, you know, at those times of which you can, you can meet those needs of creating that fun for myself in being present with my kids and doing the things that they like to do as well.

And know right now, you know, for those of you who are tuning in, you know, I super am very, very, very grateful to Every single one of you, because you are here and you're giving us that time. And our prayer is that you learn something, that you grow, or you have a perspective shift. There's something that we've triggered in you today where we feel like, you know what, we contribute a little bit to someone's life in a positive way, in an energetic way. Right? Like, and I'm sitting at a library. One of my favorite places to be. The library has free events for specific age groups, for teens, for family, for community. It literally cost you nothing. So a few months back, brought my kids to a Lego event, and it was hilarious because I am not a. I'm not a Lego creative. I'm just not. But my son, boom, he's gone. He's gone. He is just got a vision, got a mission, got the thing. He's. I was like, how did you, like, collaborate these pieces to look like a hat, you know? Or how did you think he was like it. We allow ourselves to just pour in and be in the moment and find a state of flow. So what we're encouraging, you and ourselves, I would say more than just you, is to find those moments that allow you to. To do the things that feel good. When we become adults, we are so surrounded by responsibilities that we forget what feels good. And when you forget what feels good, life becomes a burden. It doesn't become a journey that you're enjoying. So, like Eric said, things don't have to cost you money. Literally. I will bring my kids to the library, and we'll just rent out a room. And one time, we're just playing Hangman. And it was one of the most favorite moments that they had. One time, I asked them, we went on a late night walk right before they went to bed, Ask them the most random question, like, who's gonna have the biggest shoe size? Who's gonna have the beautiful hair? Who is gonna have 2020 vision? Like, I'm just looking around and randomly letting my mind explore. And my daughter says to me, that was one of the best things that we've ever done. Let's record every answer, and when we all grow up, let's see how much of it we got, right? Because who's gonna be the most intelligent? Who's gonna be the most successful? Who's gonna follow their passion? Who's gonna become a writer? Random things, and they're pointing to each other, like. And it was so engaging, and it literally cost us, what, 15 minutes? Yeah, the tech.

So great. So great. Yeah. You know what I. I love? I Love going and being at school with the kids, the students, and they love Mr. S when he can be on their level of silliness, if you will, and, and allowing them to be kids because they can get into a class where it's super structured and you're sitting there, you don't say a word unless you teach a claws on you, you raise your hand, is perfectly silent in there. And they get out and they just wanna, they just want to release that out because they've been, they've been, they've been holding it in and now they have to release it out. And they're, they're learning and have learned that I am that space of which they can come and just release all that out. And kids will walk up to me and say the most random off the wall stuff and we laugh and we, we high five and you know, and, and it's that time of which they can be who they are. They don't have to worry about trying to fit a mold of the middle school. They, they can be who they are and let go and just allow that inner child to come out. Because they're just coming from elementary and they're still littles, they're still young, they're 11 and, and, and 12 years old and, and they are still little kids. And you know, and, and then when they understand that, you know, they can call me Mr. S. And they, they like that. And you know, I start quoting tick tock stuff to them and they think it's hysterical and I'm, I meet them on their level, right? And, and the other day, one kid was a kid was like, hey, Mr. S, do you, do you, do you gritty? And I go, what? And so I'm up there and they're screaming with delight like, I can't believe the teacher just did that. That's insane. Mr. S, you're crazy. And it was that permission for them just to be without, without having all these social parameters that put him in boxes.

And just right now, you know, for your, for your audience. That energy I felt the giddy energy. I felt it right, like, and I know that every single one of us felt the joy that it brought for you to connect without any barriers.

Yeah.

Because I think as adults there's always like an objective almost, right? Like it's, there's like an end goal to meet. And kids are like, what? End goal? Yeah, my painting is beautiful. And you're like, it's black with white dots, right? Like as an adult you're like, imagine like, you know, like Picasso to come into fruition. And you're like, hello. Like, don't take it so seriously. And literally, you know, I was talking to one of my coaching clients the other day, and she's like, umbreen, how are you telling me that I should be in elevated energy with the turmoil of the world and what we're facing nowadays? And I said, I don't want you to deny any of that, but what if you can change the lens to be a narrative of gratitude? What if you can say, I want to imagine a better world? I'm so grateful that I have running water and that I have safety and my daughter gets to grow up in this way and I can afford this and you don't have to. I think as human beings, we get into this, like, this rut of comparison. Like, Jimmy does not care that you have Nike's latest and greatest shoe on, and Scott does not care that you're wearing a five dollar Primark shirt. They don't, they don't, they don't care. But as adults, and the saddest thing is, it's all in our head. Like, I'm never gonna come up to your wife, Eric, and say, oh my God, those shoes are so expensive. I've never been able to afford one pair for my own self. No. But I might in my head be like, God, what does she do where she can afford a pair of Jimmy Choos? And I've been thinking about them for the past five years. What does she do? And lo and behold, you find out that she won a raffle and she got him. Right. Like, we don't, we don't know, but we have this whole narrative of comparison that locks us from, from being in a space of just recognizing that our journey is ours. And even though Jimmy has really mean parents and a home that is filled with abuse, Jimmy won't let that shy away from the fact that he's having a great time just mingling and playing at recess. Jimmy is not doing that. But as adults, we get so locked in our own state of mind. Forget imagining, we don't even live this moment. Right. And that's so sad because the only thing that is that we have in this world is allowing our soul to experience it all. All of it. Yeah. Yet we're limiting ourselves because of our mindsets.

Yeah, that's, that's so true. And, and, and, you know, I, I think there's times of which there are stressors that land on adults. And how often do we talk and talk and talk and talk and talk about in the home. And, and, and we're constantly, it's constantly looping, you know, and, and, and coming out and, and my kids have, have stopped me and said, you know what, dad? Like, stop talking about it. We're sick of hearing about it. Like, just let it be. Whatever's going to happen is going to happen. You don't have that control. I love when my kids teach me, you don't have that control. And I go, yeah, but it's a, it's a major concern. That's okay. It can be a concern. But for Pete's sake, can you just stop talking about it? Because we're thinking, hearing about it, and it's so true. Like, like we're thinking about the stresses of the world that are weighing down in our families around the world, globally.

Right.

And, and how much of that is, is picked up into the home and becomes that focal point of attention. And then what happens to then our relationships with our kids right now, Right now. Not right now, not right now, you know, stop it, stop it. This is serious. You're not being serious.

Right.

And this is, this is us creating that gap between our kids and that childlike faith, that childlike behavior and what they need that we're not giving them in that, in that space because we're so wrapped up in our own adulting that we don't take their. What they need as kids into account.

I also want to shed some light, you know, Eric, on that point with. You're right. And that's what I kind of came down to is at the end of the day, the only person that we have control over is ourselves. Yeah, but if we were to shift that, that lens or that perspective and really broaden it to say when you are consuming yourself in the stressors of life, whether that be things that are part of your life that are happening all around the globe, or the fact that you didn't get the promotion that you deserved or desired. When all that is happening, we're also taking that short end of the stick into our workplaces, not only in our families, not only in our communities. We are consuming ourselves in the energy and we're wrapping it around. And we think we're doing nothing bad and nothing wrong. But your co workers are also tired of you listening and complaining about the project that you didn't get or the fact that your boss didn't give you a promotion or the fact that they called you out in a meeting. There's so much, however, when they're little kids, and if I'm talking about kids who haven't been raised to complain and raised to look at the negative because their parents are leaders. And one of the biggest shifts that came from my own life and one of the biggest awakening that I had is as a coach. First, I began to coach individuals who were executives and leaders in corporations. And I was like, what's going on? Something's not right. Heart's like, oh. And I was like, stop. What's the most important thing in the world for you? And I was like, relationships, Family. And as. As a Pakistani woman, family is not my kids and me. That's. That's not a thing. We don't have that as a thing. Your family is like at least 35, 40 people. Like, just a small family, right? That includes your siblings, your spouse's siblings, their kids, and their parents. And. But you're like, yeah, that's a bare minimum, right? But what we start to do is we start to think of ourselves as just parents and not leaders and leaders. And you and I both know, right, We've. We've had enough cross checks with individuals where you and I know that there is a manager and then there is a leader. The manager manages you, tells you what to do, how to do it. Noah, tell me. Get it done. This is the way a leader's like, this is what I was thinking. What do you think? And you're like, huh? I think I'm gonna miserably fail. Great. Let's fail together. Let's see what we learned from this. Let's find out five ways of doing this and figure out how to best do it. Let's be creative. Let's brainstorm. Let's get the team involved. Let's like. So as parents, most of us are managing our life, our tasks, our day, our schedules. We're not leading. When you start to lead, you're not really so focused on the end result as much as you are on the lessons and the journey and the connection and the engagement. So when you and I, or anybody you know who's listening here, takes this energy that is wrapped up in negativity, and we really think we're doing nothing wrong at our workplaces. We are. Because people talk and they will say, oh, here comes a complainer, they might not say it to your face. They might not want to avoid your energy because they know it's going to drain you. But it's all there, you know? And in order for us to tap into more of being childlike, kennels don't complain. It's freezing. You're like, dude, it's negative 20 degrees, it's cold out. And they're like, well, we're going to go sledding because it snowed. It's a blizzard. It snowed two days ago. This beautiful hill. And like, dear God, you know, we don't complain. Yeah. But the parents will, the adults will.

Yeah, yeah. You know, it's, it's. I love that that you said that. It's, it's. For us as the adults. What are we projecting to the kids? What are we projecting in our workplaces? What are we projecting to our families? And you know, this just happened recently where I, I ask somebody at, at a workplace, hey, how you doing? I hate this place. I said, that sounds really, really tough. I, I'm, I'm sorry that you're, that your role is, is, you know, playing that big of a impact that you would, you would say that. I hope, I hope you have a good day today. And I mean, this is the beginning of the day and you're showing up in that presence, you're showing up that way to be interacting and working with other people that you hate that place. Like, that's so sad to me because I'm showing up like heck. Yeah. Let's go, let's go make this day just absolutely amazing. Let's make it the best day that we possibly can. Sure. There's going to be things that stink about it. Don't worry about it. Is it really not that big of a deal at the end of the day? If it is, I'm not in the right, the right mindset and, and, and heart set space because I'm not coming in with a heart of love and gratitude and I'm not coming into that space and bringing that. I'm not, I have not prepared myself to enter that space with that, with that gratitude and that heart of love and service.

Yeah. It all kind of ties back into that. My, my show. Right. Like leading with intentions. Yeah. I, I know there's going to be a tough, it's going to be a tough day today. I know that meeting is going to be, it's going to challenge me today. I know that project is going to require me to, to learn and to grow and I may not be able to meet the deadline. I know, why not just take some small moments to prepare, prepare ourselves for the intention and the way that we want to show up. You know, I think you can crush your whole day. You can definitely crush your whole day. And at the end of the day when you put your head on your Pillow. You may not feel accomplished because you didn't feel anything. You didn't intentionally do anything. You kind of went through the mundaness of it all.

Yeah.

And the sad thing is, nowadays a lot of kids say to me, I gotta hate school. Hate going to school. I just. And for me, it's so hard to understand that. Yeah. Because when I came from Pakistan to America, school was easy. It was fun. It was like the teachers didn't beat you up, they didn't scold you, they didn't yell at you, didn't make you stand outside for 45 minutes because someone in your class failed. They didn't do all those things. They didn't make it so strict that you were like, oh, my God, I'm in the army. They were all drill sergeants, all of your teachers and the. The principal. Yeah. You don't want to. You don't want to be anywhere near this principal and simple stuff. Right. Like, before we entered school, our uniforms, we all had to wear uniforms. They had to be fully pressed. Our nails had to be trimmed and cut. Our shoes had to be polished. You know, if you have. If you're a boy, you had to wear a tie. If you were a girl, you wore a stole. Your hair was not down. It was pinned up. And it had to reference and the colors of the school. And if you someday didn't cut the nails, there was a metal ruler that came to remind you, those nails better be chopped off tomorrow. Or you were like, okay, well, there's like this thing called, like, become a rooster. And you literally squat down and then you throw your legs, hold on to your ears. It's scorching hot. No one's saying anything to you. They're like, all of you? Yep, all of you.

Wow.

So this is. This is what I came from. It's very standard. Not gonna say it was like, bad or good. That's just the way the culture over there worked. And so now I'm coming to school in America. What do you mean? I don't have to wear uniform. This is really hard stuff. What do you mean? Like, I gotta now. Like, I gotta think of what I gotta wear. Like, really, I have options for shoes where the teachers don't beat me me up. Like, they're gonna teach me how to speak in English. Like, I'm gonna get pulled out of the normal people class and go to a small area where they're gonna teach me through childish books. I'm gonna pick the first one up. I see they're gonna teach me through childish Books, you know how to read this. Like, I don't even know how to combine these words together and, and say something. Finding Christmas. I think about that. Who finds Christmas? That's what Christmas happens. But no, as a kid, you find Christmas. Yeah. And so when you're living into that state, it's hard for me to understand what these kids say, that I hate school.

Yeah.

But then I have to go back and ground and humble myself and say, didn't have your life. They are living in America and they're very privileged. They're very privileged and they don't know what they don't know. I cannot compare my life to theirs. But I really want to dive deeper. And I ask you, actually, Eric, why do you think children nowadays vocalize so easily as your adult co workers? That I hate this place. And that could be any organization. Doesn't have to be that. The fact that you're in a school setting, what do you think it is about children no longer enjoying school?

Boy, you know What? That's the $10 million question, I think. Right, right now, because I think that's on the forefront of education leaders around our country as they're looking at what is tying in school performance standards and metrics of how kids are, are doing academically and socially and emotionally. And that's, that's at the forefront and, and not just in elementary and middle school and high school, but, but college and university level as well. And, you know, that's, that's something that I think they're hard at work on trying to figure that out and how to reach kids and really help them understand that this is a place that you can be safe and can feel safe and, and that school is supposed to be enjoyable.

Yeah.

Whereas, you know, I'm seeing it, you know, with the kids that I'm with, like, they can be happy, but they're not enjoying school because it's, it's. Yeah, we're, we're, we have to learn this stuff, which doesn't matter. And so we're seeing some pendulum swinging in terms of, of, of that. And because, of course, you know, district schools and districts are measured by academic performance. And I talk with the kids and I say, well, think about it in this regard, if you will. You're, you're going to be going off to a job someday, and in your job there are going to be certain expectations for your performance, whether it's flipping burgers or you're selling cars or you're operating on people. Doesn't matter. There are, there are metrics that have to be completed and measured for your success in that. And then I say, okay, what does that look like here as sixth or seventh or eighth graders here in the middle school? 11, 12, 13, 14 year olds. And they say, well, if I do well academically, then that's something that is measured. Okay, great. So what do you need to do to ensure that you have success along that journey? Well, I got to complete my homework, I need to do, you know, study for my test and blah, blah, blah. And then we say, well, how are you showing up when we go back into the presence of. So once they understand what they have to do in that, in that physical part, then we get into the emotional part and, and the spiritual part and showing up in, in a certain, in their mindset and showing up with their belief system that they can do this, they will do this, and it's really not as bad as it's being portrayed, but that they can have success if they show up with, with hearts of gratitude and they show up with love for themselves and others in the world around them if they show up ready to do what's necessary with a glad heart. And some of them are like, well, I don't need a glad heart to come to school. We talk about, what does that look like, sound like and feel like for you if you show up with a glad heart as opposed to showing up angry, mad, and then how does that affect your learning that day? And so just like we've been talking about, I'm, as the adult learner and leader, I'm showing up in that love, in that gratitude, in that joy, that peace, to be able to magnetize that out for them. And if they're doing the same thing for them, they're gonna have a day of which they feel physically and emotionally lighter. And they get down at the end of the day and they're like, yeah, that was, that was a pretty good day.

What if we actually think about this with the lens that we're talking about today? Just fun, right? What if all kids needed right is. Is more fun in school? And I know they're like, exactly what you said. It kind of goes back to that point where you just mentioned, like, the kids were just sitting in their classrooms the whole time and they couldn't really talk or do anything. I had to learn in a specific way, like in a struck, in a very structured way. And then they came to my class and we were like, babbing. I'm like dancing with them. And they can totally be themselves. And they're like, you're so stupid, silly, you know, like Mr. S, you're so silly. It's not like, that's not normal. And so I think, you know, and I'm, I literally asked Google like, yo, like, what are the best ways, you know, that kids learn in school? And the answer is just profound. It really ties back into our conversation right now, is like they want to be engaged, they want to understand why they're learning. They want to play, they want to observe, listen, explore, experiment. Now all of that is fun. All of that is fun. As adults, we don't even want to sit in a classroom for 15 minutes and just listen to the teacher lecture us. We don't. You know what will make us learn better? Group gatherings. If one day the teacher said, okay, I want you to teach somebody about the topic that you learned yesterday. I want you to teach them for five minutes and the other five minutes I want you to teach the other person what you learned. Right. And maybe it's okay not to have the structure of sit in your seats for 35, 40 minutes and listen to the teacher. Maybe it's like, how about you understand that honesty? God, it sounds so mean to say, but I'm going to say it. No one's listening to you. No one's listening to me. And here we are requesting people to say, hey, if you can just get some insight from this conversation. Nobody is listening, but what we are doing is watching. And as human beings, we don't enjoy doing what we enjoy being. And as adults, we are human doings. Doing, doing the curriculum, doing the structure, doing the completion, doing the lesson planning, doing the test grade. We're doing, doing, doing, doing. We're not being right. I think schools would, and I think maybe the kids would stop saying, I'm gonna actually start asking random kids, like, why do you not like school? Or what could school do to better, you know, like just make it more fun? Yeah, keep the structure there. But what if we change the way that we taught because we as adults don't even like being taught by a lecture way of sitting in a seat and taking notes for that long. Because guess what, we have to go back and review these notes several times before the tests to do well. And the 13 year old kid does not care to review the notes seven times before to get their A or their B. They're going to just go from whatever their memory bank has. But what if you made it engaging, experimental, innovative, more play, more creative? We all know that the best memories that we have in our lives is when we're Tapping into that childlikeness. Yeah. Yeah.

I love it. And I think. I think you just. You just hit the. The. The big takeaway for tonight. And, and that is to be aware of. Of you being a human doer to a human being. And, and the difference between the two. A human doer checking off the box. It's a human being experiencing life and, and doing that in a way that brings you joy and fulfillment and peace and happiness and. And. And not. Not in. Not in, like, the. A way. Like, you're not taking the rest of the world in. You're just choosing to be. In gratitude, to be in joy, to be in peace while you're doing some of these things. And it makes a big, big difference in. In how I am human doing versus human being.

And in all honesty, it is true. You know, yes, we all have to wash the dishes. Yes, we have to mop the floor. Yes, we have to. We have to, you know, cook the meal, help with the homework, pay the bills. Yes. But I think one of the biggest shifts that I've noticed in my own life is acceptance. Yeah. And I'm like, okay, yeah, I accept that I'm a single mother of three adolescents. I accept that I'm sharing a home with my mother and father. I accept that my mindset is not going to be like anyone else's mindset because I am my own being. And once I can accept those things, then I allow myself to be more and do less. Put some songs on while you mop that floor, girl.

Yeah.

Shake it a little if you need to. Right. Like, you know, like, think about it. Yeah. Just simple shifts. Put some music on that elevates you. Put a TV show on in the background. That's just comedy where you're just like, yeah. This mundane task of, like, mopping the floor or sweeping or grooming, whatever. Yeah. Spice your life up again a little bit, which is cheap thrills, right? Like, it doesn't cost anything for us to put some music on. Yeah. Shake our. Shake our bum a little bit. Like, absolutely pretend that broom is yours. Is your mic. Like, go crush it.

I love it. I love it. So friends and family around the world, this. This is something that is really near and dear to both Coach On Bream and myself, because we know from our own experiences how it feels when you're stacking up just being a doer and you forget to be and how that really, really gets out of whack. And when all of a sudden you're in a reflective state. Why am I feeling like this. Why am I so tired? Why do I have no energy? Why do I feel mad? Why does. Why does my shoulders feel so heavy? Because we're carrying so much stress in, in, in the weight of our shoulders. And I got neck tension and everything in there, right? And I just, I just want a veg. Right? These are all the things that I know I have said to myself a thousand times. But what I've learned from that experience is I'm not being. And so yesterday I, I. All day, I was like, man, I feel so light. And I knew that I was being. I knew that I was in a great state of gratitude and a great state of love and peace. And it was like it didn't matter what was happening. I felt great. And today was a little bit heavier. And I'm like, okay, what's different from yesterday than it is today? And I understood today I had more worry, I had more doubt, I had more fear based on the things that I had to do, do, and I wasn't being enough. And so friends and family, as you guys get into this, you see, feel, and hear your kids exhibiting behaviors, outburst, anger, talking back, however that comes out for them. Take a time out and pause and connect with them and say, hey, tell me what's going on. Tell me what you're feeling right now. Tell me what's going through your mind right now. Is there anything that you're worried about, concerned, or are you upset about anything? And just be with them and allow them to vent that out so they can understand where they are as a. A being and not just a doer at their young age. So coach on Breen, listen, you know, you are just an absolute joy, and I so, so glad the universe has brought us together in the same space, you know, over and over and over again. And it's always just a wonderful time to be with you. And I thank you. I thank you so much for being here with me. Can you tell our friends and family around the world where they can find you?

Yeah. So I just created a brand new website. We ramped it up. It's just called coachumbrain.com you can definitely go there, reach out to me. There's a lot of fun stuff coming, like an Umberg bot, which is basically, you can get coached by me, you can talk to me, and it's going to be so much fun. So coachumbrain.com is the best place to reach me. Also live and active on LinkedIn as well. This says coach and brain Hamid. So reach out to me. Let me Know what resonated? Well, you know, you can literally book some time with me. Book some time. Let's just, let's just talk. Let's see where you're at with life and how I can support you.

Oh, that's beautiful. And any, any final thoughts here for our friends from today?

Yeah. I really pray that I've lived into my intention for this conversation, which is role modeling through energy.

Yeah.

How we can just be a little bit more.

I love that. I love that. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that, friends and family. Just thanks so much for tuning in or catching the replay if you're tuning in live. Hey, be watching on my Facebook feeds, LinkedIn and my private Facebook group, the Empowered Family Network, because I am going to be doing a free webinar on Thursday that is going to launch a master class on automatic negative thoughts. And I'm doing this with my dear friend Yayoi from brain to belly and we are doing a master class together. So this is something you will not want to miss, I guarantee you on that. So be watching because we're going to be hitting that live on Thursday. We're going to hit the gritty on Thursday and we are going to be rolling and teaching us how to break those patterns of automatic negative. Your thoughts. So thank you guys so much for being here. We just love, love, love that you were in this space and time with us tonight and we thank you so much for that. And just to remind you, this show is also being heard on the Spanglish Radio Network. Please check it out at Spanglish World CA for all the news and programming. Spanglish World. Watch it, hear it, read it, download it, live it. Thank you guys so much for being here. We'll see you soon.

Sad.