High Performing Couples: Seek Clarity

Reflection filled day to you. What does that mean? I'm. That means that I am praying that you and I get a little bit better just by reflecting on the things that we're currently doing and find ways of improving it. It's coaching brain here who is, you know, someone that is passionate about family. I call myself an ex mom. What does that even mean? That means that I'm somebody who's really striving and thriving to understand how little humans to be more accepting of who they are and then also fill that up and fill it up with compassion and love. And I know it's a super hot topic and difficult thing to do. Just saying it doesn't mean I'm really executing it all the time. So that's why I think for me as a coach, what's really important is to really find ways to build family. Yesterday I was speaking with a couple and it was so brilliant. These two are high performers. The great thing about high performers is that they want to keep leveling up. They are like, we're doing this, this and this. Like, you know, the wife is enrolled in a master's program. She got a full time job, she's got a full time family, she volunteers excessively. She's teaching at her church. There's so much that's going on and for him, he's got his kids extracurricular. Being the father, kind of the plan or the initiator, a full time job and of course teaching as well at our church. There's so much these two were doing and I couldn't stop a pause that what it took for them to really be this amazing strong couple was the fact that the both of them had similar values and similar goals. Clarity of knowing where you want to go. And that's the first thing that we talk about in my coaching program is how do you get clear on who you want to be and how you want to show up so that way you can really build out a roadmap of getting there. And this could be something as simple as, hey, I want to land a new job or I want a promotion or I just want to be more patient with my kids, I want to be more expressive with my partner. Whatever those goals are. Nothing is too small to be a goal and nothing is too big to not dream. And it was such a beautiful balance that I heard both of them talking about the necessity to be open, necessity to understand that we're human, we are going to make mistakes. And as a parent, what they shared was that it's their job to make their little humans means their kids self sustainable and just be more future oriented. And how does future and all that tie back into clarity? When we are seeking clarity, I mean that we know we are clear about what matters to us in our lives. How does it, how do we show that it matters? By making sure that it's on your calendar, that you've booked time, that you've prioritized it. That's how we know we're clear. If I were to ask you what is the most important thing in your life and unless you're a single person, you know, who's kind of like exploring and living it up, you'll most likely say that it's family. Now let me ask you this question. When you are saying your family matters more than anything else in the world, that's why you're here listening to this conversation. Because you and I both know I'm a family driven high performance coach and I've got a curriculum that works, that gives you a 97% success rate proven through hours and hours of hundreds and hundreds of conversations. By just making sure that this high performance curriculum and this program is something that executes. I went through my own self and I really prioritized my family. How? By making sure I'm blocking time out, by making sure that I'm really connecting with them and engaging with them. And one of the most profound things that happened during this conversation with this couple was how they looked at their day. Like, we're all really busy, our kids are busy, he is busy, she is busy. We've got a lot of things that we're doing with extracurricular. We're doing this, we're doing that. And I said, I often hear parents talk about this and couples talk about this. We're busy. What if you were to change the word busy to productive? How would things change for you? And they said, well, being productive is like, it's an outcome driven thing. Said, yeah, those results, they matter to you, right? Just like the way they matter to you, to me, to every single one of us. We want to accomplish things in our lives. We have places we want to be, goals you want to achieve. Said, when you're looking at spending time as a family together, to take her to dance, to cook, to clean, to, to connect, to do a movie night, to game night, to all the small things, even a daily dinner, why is it looked upon as being productive and not being, you know, being busy and not being productive? And I saw the light bulbs turning and I got so excited because that's it productivity is driven by outcomes. We when we are productive and intentional about what we want to achieve and accomplish for our family, for our children, and how we aspire to see them as responsible individuals in this world, we're being very productive. We may not see it right away because these kids, they take a little bit of time to show us the results. However, the outcome is proven how one of their little humans is an adult now and going off to college pretty soon, and they're so proud of the person that, you know, he's become. All of it ties back into this concept of they were clear, they had clarity on what they wanted to achieve as parents. And not to say they've gotten it done. Bada bing, bada bing, bada boom. They're making mistakes, they're apologizing, they're setting, resetting, and reflecting on how things can be done a little bit better. And then, of course, taking ownership when we make those mistakes because our kids really need to see us role modeling to say, you know what, mom and dad, we also mess up, too. And when you mess up, we ask you for forgiveness. And it was just this brilliant conversation, so I couldn't stop to pause and let you know that there are these people in this world who I call X moms and ex dads. And when you hop on my coaching program, my intention is just that, to take the both of you on a separate journey, six weeks away from one another, where we really start to plan out. What does it mean for you to be clear about who you want to be? How do you work with the game of energy? How do you really influence through role modeling? What is it that you could do to manage your time by managing your life a little bit better? And more importantly, how do you allow yourself to tap into an elevated level of courage so that way you can fuel into yourself, into your relationship as a couple, and then pour that into all over again to that family, which is the most profound and the most important relationship that we may not always prioritize. So allow me to help you get there. Allow me to say, all right, I'm brain. Let me just hop on that. That complimentary call with you and see what's possible, because I'm telling you, this program works, and the possibilities are limitless. With all of that said, sending you a ton of umbergy and a whole lot of goodness, this is ex mom signing out. Take brilliant care of yourself until next time, folks. Bye.