Coach Ambereen shares a personal morning parenting anecdote about her daughter’s low energy and complaints. She models responding with calm, kindness, empathy and measured boundaries (e.g., offering rest, contingency plans, and letting the child choose), arguing that small acts of compassion can change the day and parent–child dynamics.
Generously to you. I hope today you have moments where you are giving or more importantly, receiving as well. A lot of good energy, vibes, prayers, actions and act and acts of kindness that you are getting from people who are all around you, people who you know and you may not know. Why is that so important? Because I think it's these simple acts of kindness that can really shift the day, that could really change the way that we're feeling right now. Because in giving, we are also very much receiving. So very much for tuning in and watching this simple insight on what I as ex mom did today as I went through my morning with the kids. And you know, every single day we as parents have challenges. Some of them we anticipate, others not so much. Well, every day brings with it a lot of different things to tackle today. My kids for some reason weren't in like the high energy vibes that they were yesterday. And so I had to do a little bit of work to also calm myself down and kind of meet them where they are. My daughter, though, was on a different level. She woke up and she was okay, kind of hugged me. And then from that moment on until she came downstairs for breakfast. So something had shifted. She was like, my stomach hurts, my head hurts, my body hurts, everything hurts. I said, okay. And I said, we gotta sit down and eat breakfast. I don't want to eat anything. I have no appetite. So, you know, you have to eat before you go to school. It's kind of one of those things that we have known in our family. She goes, I'm going to vomit. And in that moment, I felt it. I felt her energy, I felt the complaining. And I realized, and I asked myself, how do I show up as ex mom? How do I show up as a mother who just is going to accept her kids, embrace the challenges, give them grace and just be patient with them. And I said, well, bubba, if you need to vomit, so go ahead, you can vomit. Now. I'm not telling any of you to do what I did. What I'm saying is I know my kids and their patterns, so I do what I think is best in that time. And so after that, she's just sat there, she finished her breakfast, I went to go drop off her older brother. I came back and she was still in the exact same place where she was done with breakfast. But she was, her energy was just really low. So she sat there putting on her shoes and she's like, oh, I feel so bad. Oh my God. She's just going on and on. So I chose not to get involved. Right. I chose to. To kind of see it from afar because I knew the distance was going to be beneficial for me until she used those lovely words that none of us parents want to hear. You don't care about me, she said. And I was okay. Right now I just step in and I kind of need to show her, and she's seeking attention. I got to show her that. No, you do matter. When there and talked to her, kind of gave her a hug, just gave her an energy exchange. And she got a little better. But she said, it's still like, my body hurts, my head hurts. I said, what do you want to do? And so she doesn't really say anything, like, about staying home. I said as we walked out the door, said, you know, if you're not feeling well more the nurse's office, and you can ask her to send, you know, you. You can ask her to call me and I'll come and pick you up if nothing changes. She goes, no, you don't understand. The nurse is so, you know, she's like this. She won't let me go and blah, blah, blah. And she'll just say, take two minutes of rest and then go back. But this is just like, it's continuing. Now we're outside. Thank God for the fresh outside air because I needed it so bad. And I said, well, how about you give her a shot and see what happens? She said, you're not going to pick up your phone. I said, I'm letting you know that I'll pick it up. My phone will ring. Because mostly my phone is. It doesn't really ring. It's silent. And I said, you can contact me and call me whenever you need. They're walking to the bus stop. And now we're trying our best to do our practice right. My son's with me too. Now. I do our practice of sharing our intentions and just being grateful. And it's. Something is just. She's, like, stuck. So I look at her and I say, hey, Mama. I send off her brother. I say, you know, have a great day. We give each other a hug and a kiss, and he goes off. And I held her hand and I said, why don't you stay back? Why don't you stay home today? And you can, you know, you can. You can spend some time and get better. And as we were walking, what I realized, what she said is like, I don't want to go to school today. I just want to spend time with you. What she's done before, too, right? She said, I don't want to spend time. I want to spend time with you. I don't want to go to school. So I. So sometimes what we've done in the past is we'll plan that day in advance to say, okay, this day, you're not going to go to school, but let's make sure you have everything done before this day arrives to stay on a level of success. Am I encouraging that for you? No. But again, she's different, and she needs those days right. Just by her and me and nobody else. And at that time, when I said that to her, she literally was like, oh, no, I'm going to school. Said what? She was not have to get on the bus. I'm going to go. I said, are you sure about that? And she goes, yeah. I'm like, well, if you need me, let me know. Why am I sharing all of this with you? It's these simple acts of kindness that can really, truly change the day. When my daughter said, you don't care, and I chose not to show her that I didn't care, she would believe that even though in her heart she may know it's not true, she'll believe that in her mind when I'm letting her know that I'm listening to. I'm hearing you, yes, okay, you can stay back one day and, you know, get better. Then she realized that, okay, I actually have to go to school today because I've got a few things I'm committed to that I want to show up for. So take the time out to take those deep breaths, to calm yourself down and to really not take things personally, especially when our kids share things with us that are not so wonderful and amazing. With that said, signing out, sending you a whole lot of goodness. Take good care of.
