In this coaching video, Ambereen explains that simply saying “I love you” is insufficient for a thriving marriage and outlines four concrete communication practices that can protect and strengthen a partnership. She begins by emphasizing that successful relationships start with internal mindset shifts. The first practice is to be curious, not critical: notice a partner’s emotional cues and ask open‑ended questions instead of jumping to judgment. The second is to be careful, not crushing: reframe feedback in a gentle, context‑aware way rather than blunt criticism. The third is to ask, don’t assume: seek clarification about thoughts and actions instead of filling in gaps with assumptions. The fourth is to connect before you correct: establish empathy and positive regard before offering corrective feedback, using kind, authentic language. Throughout, Ambereen provides relatable examples and stresses that consistently applying these habits can prevent the erosion of trust and reduce the likelihood of divorce. The video ends with an encouraging call to adopt these habits and a warm sign‑off.
Chapters
No one gets married to file for divorce. I'm sure many of you will agree to that statement, like, yeah, that's not what you want at the end, do you? So there are some key things we have to remember when it comes to actually creating a successful marriage. And it all really starts within. There's some things that we are not doing right to really create that relationship that is filled with success. So if you're ready to learn how to really have a successful relationship, a partnership, a companionship, let's get started. The first and the most important thing that I really want you to focus on is to be curious, not critical. Write that down somewhere. How do you become curious? You ask the right questions. How do you ask the right questions? By taking notice. So when you see a frown on your partner's face, instead of just assuming, right? And being critical, like, oh, why do you look like that? What's wrong now? Ask, ask, hey, what's going on? I feel like something's off today. And that simple shift in my own life literally has removed so many problems. Because instead of just pretending like I know the answer, I'm actually asking for that specific answer, which will not only support me, but will also support our marriage. The second thing that's key and so very important is to be careful, not crushing. Sometimes you get hurt. Sometimes the wrong things happen. The right things are said in the most horrible context. Like, let's say that your partner asks you, how do I look? And you're just like, wow. Like, not as amazing, right? So even that statement, I'm going to get bashed for. But it's true. Sometimes you're like, hey, maybe you should cover up a bit more. Maybe we're going to a funeral. That's not the right outfit, whatever it is, right? Instead of being completely critical and saying not the right thing, you could just be like, hey, you know what? I think it might not be appropriate for where we're going. See how that huge, that simple reframe can really shift everything. Okay, what else do we keep doing to really have a successful relationship? I want you to. This one is really important. Ask, don't assume. There's this fun thing my uncle would always say is assuming makes an ass out of you and me. And it's in the word. So apologies for being straight up and direct, but this is how it is, right? Don't assume you know what's going on with your partner. Don't assume you know what's going on in their life, in their hearts, in their mind, in their head. None of that. Just ask, Ask them questions. Like, recently there was somebody who did something pretty out of left field, and instead of me assuming what I did is, I asked them, hey, can you please explain to me the thought process you were going through when you did this? And it was so lovely, because what they said is, oh, yeah, I didn't want to get my hands dirty twice. So I literally got the nasty things done, washed my hands, and now came back to the task that I was doing. Such a simpler way of looking at life. Right? Keep going. Let's find out what else is there. This is one of the most important ones. And you'll hear me talk about this all the time, which is connect before you correct. Connection is actually a key human driver. Most of the people around you really just want deep, rich, meaningful connection, which means that before you go to correct your partner, your husband, your wife, I want you to really connect with them. Be kind, be authentic, be uplifting, be praiseworthy, say all the right things. Like, hey, you know what? I've noticed that as of recent, you're really not doing X as well as users too. That X could be like, you're not taking as great care of yourself as you used to, right? Connect with them and tell them that you feel like something is not happening the way it usually is. No right way, no wrong way. Just the fact that you've observed a difference and that connection is so important before correcting them, correcting anything they're doing right. So a lot of times I will say things like, hey, you know what? You know, I love you. You know that one of my biggest priorities in life is, is to make sure that I can do everything possible so that you're more uplifted, you're more happy, you're more energized. And that's a great way to start versus saying, hey, you know, you're doing this thing wrong, that thing wrong, all the stuff and all these problems. And so I really pray that today you took away simple ways that you can actually protect your marriage so it doesn't really have to end up, you know, in a divorce. Because we really need to make sure we start to do things differently if we want to have a successful relationship. Make sure. Make sure that you start to be curious, that you are careful, that you don't assume. And lastly, that you connect, sending you a ton of Emberji and a whole lot of goodness. Until next time.
