Destiny, Mindfulness, Empowerment, and Cosmic Insights

I don't have any joy. I have all these great accomplishments. I don't even know what I'm doing in my life. And she was so sweet to say, you know what, jj, you really need to go to mindfulness training. And I just thought it was so crazy ridiculous of a recommendation. I was like, yeah, I'm not doing that. Then the third time she's like, if you don't go, please don't come back because you do not know how to be in the present moment. And I was like, I am in the present moment all the time. But in reality, I wasn't.

You weren't.

And I think mindfulness for me was the tool that really gave me insight to how to be in the life I was creating.

Hello. Hello. Welcome to another episode of the Right on Time podcast. I'm your host, Amber McHugh. But today we have an incredible guest, JJ. And there are just connections that happen that are unexpected and so beautiful. And if you are here listening to this episode right now, there's likely enough get in here for you. JJ is driven, she is accomplished, she is successful. And yet she lives her life in a way where she's not pushing, she's not working through the grind, she is not feeling the hustle and the pressure and the stress of what can sometimes creep in when we've got all of the things going on. In fact, her first book was designed for people who got all of the things going on on the working woman's GPS because she questioned, where is the Cliff Notes for how to do all of the things that we do as we are building careers and families and growing our lives and navigating all of the things with relationships and financials and, and, and. And growing professionally and personally. Then she wrote Accelerate youe Impact and her newer third book is called See Seeking 74 Key Findings to raise your energy, sidestep self doubts and align with your life's work. JJ is an award winning author and former tech industry leader who empowers women with tried and tested strategies, mindfulness and energetic practices to increase impact and influence. JJ's work has been featured in Forbes, the Wall Street Journal and Thrive Global. Through those three books, keynotes and popular podcasts, career strategies for women that work and together we seek, JJ shares proven key findings that help women gain more seats at more tables. You we're going to link up all of her connections and resources in the show notes, but in case you're listening now and want to make a note, you can discover her work at jjdejeronimo or inside her community at TogetherWeSeek Online. With that, we're going to dive into this beautiful conversation and we're going to kick it off with JJ sharing how she got to where she is today. And notice all of the, the whispers, the nudges, the right on time moments that she maybe couldn't see in the moment, but that were unfolding for her as she went on this journey. I can't wait for you to listen and definitely let us know if you liked or got a nugget from this episode. I'm Amber McHugh on Instagram and you can always leave a note wherever you are listening. Introducing jj. Jj, I am so happy to be here with you. Thank you.

Oh, Amber, I'm so thrilled. Thank you for the invitation. And I love, I just love your tenacity and your ability to just use your life as a storyboard for others. So thank you.

Oh, my gosh, thank you. And same. You're actually, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna say much to kick this off because I want to hear it from you. Tell us your story. Tell us how you got here to where you are today.

Well, in essence of kind of what you talk about in regards to, like, things do not happen overnight. This is an entire journey. I'm gonna tell you a story that I have don't really share that often because it's really still coming to fruition. But I am working on wellness, healing, destination in the United States on Lake Erie, which is one of the Great Lakes. And I would say that that story started way back when I was in grade school and I came from very little money. And going to the beach was incredibly affordable. It was free. So I. My parents are taking me to the beach. And when I was getting ready to go to college, I was supposed to go to this really great school in New York. But my parents came to me and said they couldn't afford it. And I went back to my guidance counselor, which I often called a guide in my life. Someone who kind of pushed me right when I was kind of flailing and didn't know what to do. And he told me about the school in Ohio. Coming from New York State, I didn't even really understand where Ohio was, you know, because I'm 50 now, so we just didn't do any trips. I didn't really know where it was. But the very last day of my college experience, I met this man who, my friend set me up on a blind date. He was two years younger than me, sort of date Party. And then I moved to Atlanta. And it was at kind of. It was. He was younger, and I just never really thought about it. Seven years later, I was throwing a bachelorette party in the city he lived, and somebody knew him, and he had asked about me a couple times, and she saw him on the street and she was like, oh, my gosh, she's here. And so we ended up dancing and having fun. And then a couple months later, I went to a wedding and he was there. And then slowly but surely, we started getting together. And I was just about 30 then, and I didn't think much of it. I wasn't like, oh, I'm moving to Ohio. I had lived in Buckhead, Atlanta. I wasn't really planning to go anywhere, but over time, I eventually decided, oh, well, I'll just start coming on the weekends. Because I traveled 100% fast forward. We had children ourselves, got married, had kids. And when my kids were 2 and 3 and 4 years old, I was like, okay, well, we're gonna go to the Peach. And I said, you know, he's like, we don't go to the beach here. I'm like, why? He's like, I don't know. We just don't go. Which is the same body of water. Cleveland, Ohio, is the same body of water as Buffalo, New York. And I just started taking my kids to the beach. And fast forward, we ended up getting a cottage. And then he ended up investing in this amazing property that now is like a destination for the retreats I've been holding for six years. And I just would have never thought that my trips to Lake Erie as a grade schooler would turn into building a wellness destination in my 50s. And I just felt like it was so important to tell you this because you don't understand where your life is taking you. But if you can look back at different times, you can see really instrumental points in your life that gave you not only the experience, but the awareness.

Oh, my gosh. Of course, I'm getting a little emotional as I hear that story. I love the connections and how things just almost unexpectedly, magically, miraculously unfold even though we can't see it. How do you think that, like, we get through those moments in those times, like, okay, I can't see it, I don't know, but, ah, what do I do? How do I keep moving through when there's so much unknown?

Yeah, I would say, like my first 35, 40 years, I don't know if I was that focused. I was on kind of what is happening. Right now, unfortunately, I was so in my head, I was so in the future of planning and designing and strategizing and, you know, working through those conversations of people that, you know, were tumultuous at work or things I had to do with my kids. I was overly busy. I didn't really think about being in the present moment and really dissecting, like, what is happening right now. And it wasn't until I was highly encouraged by another guide in my life to go to mindfulness training. And I feel like those two people in my life were absolutely instrumental because they sort of really guided me at a time when I needed. I needed a little push in a direction.

That'S neat. People appear when you need them. And you opened up and asked.

I did, because I ended up in a therapist's office saying, you know, I don't have any joy. I have all these great accomplishments. I don't even know what I'm doing in my life. And she was so sweet to say, you know what, jj? You really need to go to mindfulness training. And I just thought it was so crazy ridiculous of a recommendation. I was like, yeah, I'm not doing that. She then the third time, she's like, if you don't go, please don't come back because you do not know how to be in the present moment. And I was like, I am in the present moment all the time. But in reality, I wasn't.

You weren't.

And I think mindfulness for me was the tool that really gave me insight to how to be in the life I was creating.

So you mentioned you've done a lot. You had a lot of accomplishments. Tell us what some of those accomplishments were and what that looked like.

Well, it's funny because when I hear my own bio as you read, I just. I can't even believe it. But I'm a big sharer of tools and techniques, so if I can figure out how to do it, I'm going to help someone else do it. And, you know, I brought a woman's group together in two, 2008, because I had young kids, a huge job, I was traveling all the time, and I was losing my marbles. And, you know, I didn't understand why there weren't more Cliff Notes for people of how to have it all or how to have kids and have a real job and. Or have a job and try to stay present in your marriage or try to not get in fights with your in laws or whatever. And my in laws are fabulous. But the idea is, is like, there's no Cliff Notes for women. And all the women I know are trying to hit on all cylinders, and a lot of times it just doesn't work. And then we feel left depleted. We feel left, like, defeated. And I feel like we as women have to share more. And I feel like even in the last 15 years, since I wrote my first book, like, a lot of that is coming forward now. So that's really exciting. That book kind of took me on a journey that I wasn't even expecting. I really just wrote the stories down for my daughter and people who wanted them. And I'm dyslexic, so the thought of writing books was, like, bonkers. I could have never thought I could definitely. My English teachers would have never thought I would do that. But there's great things as editors that can help sentence structure if you can tell a story. So I just, you know, I think, like, I just kept at it and my whole goal is to share what I've learned to make it easier for others.

Yeah. So good. And your first book was the. The gps. The Working Woman.

Yeah, the Working Woman's gps. The Working Woman's gps. When the plan to have it all lead you astray. Because I felt like I was, you know, out in left field and I was like, how? How the heck did I get out? And it's really for young mothers with aspirations to do big things.

So good. And you've published three books.

The second book was Accelerate your impact Action based strategies to pave your professional path. And that's really about the difference of working in your career and on your career, because after the age of 35, you have to do both. Which again, who tells you this?

Yeah, who tells you this? And this. This is a topic you speak on as well.

It is, it is. And I feel like it's kind of like the playbook for professional women that aspire to get on boards and get into the executive suite is you really need to understand the difference of how we show up and the things we need to be doing to catapult yourself in the direction you desire. And just doing good work is not going to get you there.

Mm. So good. And then your third book.

My third book, My Baby Right now, is Seeking. And it's really the most vulnerable book I've ever written because it's really about my own journey looped in with all these other stories and tons of resources. So I've met with about probably 100 energy practitioners, but about 50 of them are in the book. And I have a whole community now that you can reach out to them directly. But the idea is, is that we talk. We really dive into the things that I've heard in so many conference rooms, right? Relationships with a mother or a father, our relationship with money. Are we a practicing polluter? Like, times our confidence walk out the back door. So there's the entire book filled with resources to really help you live not only in the life you've created, but it also gives you the freedom to kind of let go of things that are no longer serving you, so that you have the energy and momentum to really dive into the things that are calling you.

You know, this is huge. I. I know when I've spoken to so many people that coming out of the COVID season, we've started to go back to normal. And so many people are realizing, like, oh, wait, I don't want to go back to that. I want to create something new or different or I think there's something new out there. And I was actually speaking to a friend, and she asked a great question. She said, do you want something different that you see out there, or you can't define it yet because you don't see. See it in anything else that's out there? I'm like, yeah, that's ex. I mean, even me, I'm like, that's exactly it. I don't see what I feel and what I like. I. I can't put words to it yet, but I know there's something. Does this. Do you. Have you heard this before? Yeah.

Well, I have heard it because I work with a lot of people that are here to change the energy of the planet. So I work with a lot of lightworkers. Lightworkers are people that really work to keep their light as bright as possible, like a lighthouse, to help others on their path. And there is no doubt that you are a lightworker. And so just in the work that you do already, it's probably not even where. It's probably not even your main work yet. You're just preparing for your main work. And I feel like that's pretty normal for people. Like, I know I've got something bigger. I just don't know how to manifest it yet. So I do hear that quite a bit. Wow.

When people. You said something really critical. They're preparing for the main work. So there's this space in between where you're doing things and they're good things and they're important things and they're impactful things and not busy work. Like, yeah, we do that too, but that's not what I'm talking about. Like, there's impactful, right? The work we do, and it may not be the main thing. What do you guide people when they're like, okay, this isn't my main thing yet. Like, I know this isn't. I'm not fully purpose aligned, but it's part of the journey. How do people move through that with ease and comfort and grace and knowing. Right. It's all coming. The divine timing that you were talking.

About, I will tell you, I'm 50 now. And I will tell you one of the biggest lessons that I've learned through all my sort of searching and alignment work that I've been doing the last decade is that life is happening for you. So wherever you are in your life right now, there is a lesson to be learned. And so oftentimes if I'm thinking, why am I not there yet? Or what am I doing right now? I start shifting my conversation to life is happening for me. Where do I have gratitude in the current existence of my life? What is going great and what is the lesson? What is the lesson? Because everything happens on purpose, whether we like to admit it or not. Because our souls are sort of on a journey of their own and they've sort of committed to what they're going to learn when they're here as a human. And many different things happen that kind of help us learn those lessons. So if you're kind of sitting there thinking, what is this all for? Why am I not moving faster? You need to shift your perspective to, what am I grateful for in this particular moment? And what is the lesson I need to learn?

What is the lesson I need to learn? Oh, that's good. I'm sorry, everybody. I just got to sit with that for a minute. Usually I'm like, over here thinking and I'm ready for the next. Like, okay, I am in it, pondering, you know, and jj, what I was actually thinking about was how you have a strong professional background, right? Strong business background. You've created your own business. And you see that, like, there's this balance. There's this beautiful balance of soul alignment and purpose. With like, no, I'm creating business and an income. And do you ever feel like those things are in contrast or has that ever been a challenge for you?

Yes, it was a challenge for years. Years. I think right now, this third book, I just turned 50. I do a lot of birth charts. So my chiron just crossed over, meaning I've gone through a lot of my soul wounds, which I love. Birth Charts because it gives you like insight to like the work you're supposed to be doing while you're here.

Okay, wait, for anyone who doesn't have, doesn't know what a birth chart is. Can you explain this?

Yeah. So birth chart is created with your birth date, your birth time and the location you came onto the planet. And it really maps out sort of planets in a 12 house chart that gives you real insight to what you're supposed to be working on. And you know, my son is in my eighth house and so I like to talk about difficult topics. I am not a chit chatter on target runs or things I have to buy on, you know, online or how to get things to work at my kids school. Like you'll never find me talking about that stuff. I like to talk about deep stuff, things that like shift energy, shift your life's work. And, and so a lot of my energy is also in my seventh house, so I like to do that one on one. So I'm not a coach, but I like to do it through books and through group sessions that allow people to really kind of move through their own stuff. And I feel like it's been highly inspirational for me to learn more about myself through that, through human design, through Reiki, other ways that I hold energy or that define or help me define who and what I'm supposed to be doing on the planet.

Oh my gosh. So good. The Seeking Journey. Speaking of that new book, baby, the Seeking Journey for. Okay, I am absolutely. I'm sure someone listening right now is going through that change of like, all right, there is change afoot and my, my theme always sort of set up a theme or an intention for the year and I could really feel that I needed to shift. So this was my word of the year. And, and people may have heard because I've shared on the podcast once before that a friend said like a shift may also sometimes feel like oh shit, oh.

And like, oh yeah.

There have been moments of that this year. And as we move throughout the year and things start to come together, I'm like, oh, I can see why the shift, the year of the shift. And I can get some grounding. But I really relate to your topic of the seeking. Like I know a shift needs to happen. So there is an element of seeking going on. And for me there's been a lot of like we talk about on the Right of Time podcast, like surrender, I gotta let go. I don't know exactly what I am seeking, which is a weird place to be when you are Driven, and you have goals and you have intentions. So I know you've got so many tools and techniques and strategies. So for the people who are like, all right, yes, I am seeking. How long do I think? How do I walk down this path? Right. Knowing I'm walking in gratitude and presence. But how do. How do we seek with comfort?

Well, I feel like I've really had to shift myself not just on, like, productivity. Like. Like around 2016, a friend told me, get rich from the energy you exchange, because as an entrepreneur, you never always know when your money's coming in. And my old days, it was really harnessed in the masculine energy of producing, creating, driving that deal forward. And I. You know, even somebody I was just doing work with last week, like, okay, let's do it backwards. How much money do you want to make? Da, da, da, da, da. I'm like, I don't. I don't work like that anymore. I don't. Not working like that, I'm not going to really be a victim to, like, having to produce every minute, because that's not my role on the planet. My role on the planet is to shine light, to. To share the lessons, to be a guide to help with the enlightenment. And once I really kind of learned more about who I was through different energy practitioners, it gave me permission to sort of get out of that masculine energy of deliver, deliver, deliver. Now I've got to do lists that are taking up the whole left side of my desk here. So it's not like I'm not still producing, but I'm not driving myself to answers or expecting certain results. Like, when I put proposals out or I put something out, I would say bring the work to me that I'm supposed to be focused on. And, you know, some things fall flat and never come back, but I don't really focus on that. I believe that I am working in orchestration with the energy of the universe and that I've chosen to be down here right now and that my work will come forward for me. And so my job is to be in the present moment, to pay attention to things that are crossing my path and leading into things that really feel good. Not things I think I should do, not things I feel guilty about, but the things I really want to do. And it's taken me a long time to practice that. I mean, I am well into six years of practicing that. But I will say that the universe has brought forward things so much larger than I could have ever, ever envisioned for myself.

Mm. There you go again, just listening. Savoring all of JJ's words. It's so good, that drive. And it's interesting. It's a hard contrast because sometimes that drive and that momentum gets you going down a path. And then. And for me, I sort of left corporate thinking. Like, okay, I don't want to live life like that. Like, I was driving and pushing hard, and then I started my own business and I was like, okay, I'm just gonna, like, follow the feeling and the passion. Like, okay, that didn't work either. I wasn't getting much done. I wasn't getting the right things done and moving forward. So how do you balance, like, when you're in that space of all right, bring the right things to me, and this needs to feel good and the energetic exchange, like, be in it for that practically. What does that look like day to day for you?

Yeah. So it's interesting because things that used to light me up or things that I used to get a lot of don't come around anymore. But now I'm getting invitations to host corporate women's events at this retreat center to talk about how to refuel, how to align with. I've never imagined that for myself. I did not think the corporate. Like, I did a lot of corporate speaking. I did not think the corporations were going to come with me to this retreat house. But because I really focused on offering these amazing experiences, there were a lot of corporate women that came that went back and even told their corporations or told their spouses. They told their corporations. And now corporate women are coming. So. And I have to do an amazing job. I mean, I'm working a lot, so I'm not going to be saying, like, oh, I'm sitting here and like, zenning out and things are falling in my lap. That is not the case. But I am leaning into what is coming instead of chasing, chasing, chasing, which I did for years. And I did a lot of work that honestly, I probably shouldn't have done because I was chasing so much.

Yeah, it's so true. I agree. And even as I'm on this journey of shifting this year, I was sitting in the space just this morning and we're in the middle of enrollment and one of my businesses and, like, you know, it's going to be fine. It's going to unfold. And I could see the path and the way forward or not. Like, the right things are unfolding and that level of detachment is sometimes scary. Right. Old me pops in and wonders, like, should you be a little bit more attached? Like, should you do or push or Chase a little bit more. And like now this, this is aligned right now and that may change. There may be a moment where like, no, okay, no, go right. Put this energy in or this momentum in. As you hear that, what comes up for you, you feel like, oh, no, no, no. Do you like, hear prior versions of yourself?

Oh, definitely. But I would say that I am. The one thing that really helps me is when I'm putting programs together, when I'm putting retreats together. Like, I go out on my patio and I ask the universe, like, this is what I'm working on. What do you think? And it's amazing how the, the wind will pick up or the birds will chirp louder. So I feel like now I'm trying to work in my flow with the universe rather than just creating individually and hoping. And so the other big thing, two things is when I'm creating stuff, I'm constantly like, almost like infusing good energy into this program. So when I'm putting a retreat together, I like just constantly think about, like, how people are going to feel, what type of like, send the women that want to have this experience. Like, the preparation for putting it out there is slightly different for me because I'm putting fusing the energy I feel into the work that I'm doing. So that's one thing. And then the second thing is I pay really close attention to what crosses my path. So I was mentioning to you that, you know, with my two books, I wanted to get my third book published. And I was having such a hard time. I can't believe how hard it was. It was during the pandemic and stuff, but still I, I'm like, this cannot be this hard. So I put out book proposals to start several places. I got all these no's back and I was just sitting there one day, I'm like, well, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna write this book. Obviously the world doesn't need it. And then people started asking me questions of content that was in the book. And I'm like, oh, okay. Well, I guess, I guess you still want me to write this book because why would people be asking me these questions? So then I was like looking and I'm like, well, maybe I'm gonna have to publish this book a different way. And then once I got down this path, these women that I'm worked with to publish the book said, well, you can republish all your books and create a space. Because I was telling him how hard it was for other women. And so then I Just put it. I never even created a website. I bought the URL. It's just sitting out there. And now, over the last probably two months, people keep asking me, how do you get books published? How do you find a book publisher? Why can I not get my book published? Well, to me, that is the universe telling me now is the time. So I feel like I have ideas and thoughts and I put them out there, but then I wait on them until we sort of get signs from other people through questions. Which just seems to be kind of my way of hearing what the universe is trying to get me to do next.

Yeah, we started this conversation talking about the timing and how things may unfold over decades. And in that space, you know, entrepreneurs, I hear from a lot, actually, entrepreneurs who are running, you know, they sold companies to Amazon or they're running, you know, $250 million a year in business. And they even said, like, it is such a blessing to have all of these ideas. And it could also be a curse because it could be a distraction. And you are like, okay, I've got this idea. Pausing, listening, letting it come in. How do you know when the timing is right? Like, enough people asked or I got enough, you know, signs. How do you know when it's like, okay, it's go time?

Well, I have a lot of examples of this, but this publishing company is, like, a lot of people just keep asking me, and it's obvious that it's just so challenging. And, you know, my goal is, with this center is to have more authors come there and do writing and all that. So I feel like it's starting to come together. It was not what I was planning to work on between now and the end of the year, but it looks like that's what I'm going to be working on. Which is just kind of funny how the universe just decides like, okay, this is the time. Like, okay, well, now I'm going to be doing this. And now people start to come to me. So I know, like, okay, things start kind of moving along. I will say, like, in 2006, I got an idea to put a woman's group together. And I tried to go to all these other people's. Women's group. Wasn't working. Wasn't working. I kept getting bring the women together. I tried to get people to help me, which I talk a lot about. I tried to get all these things, and it finally was like, fine, I will just start it. And then as soon as I started it, like, took off. And it happened really fast. And that was kind of my sign. Like, okay, people are attending, people are coming. And now I don't even really do much with it. It's just a LinkedIn group. It's almost 10,000 women. It just kind of on its own now. And I'm okay with that. Like, letting go of what you're done doing is also a super important lesson that we have to lean into because we need the space for the new things.

Be creative, because the magic happens there. Like, unexpected things come up. We're gonna go even more practical day to day. Yeah. You. You wake up. What. What does the day look like?

Well, I have a lot of meetings, so. A lot of meetings all the time. But I would say that I do try to start with a meditation. So My favorite meditation YouTube channel is Steve Noble. Love him.

Okay.

So I listened to whether it's 11 minutes or 40 minutes, whatever I can do, and then I listen to it. Meditation before I go to bed. So that's always the truth for me, is kind of the bookends of my day. And it really just helps me remember that there's.