Goaldone Week Day One - How to Feel Happy Whether or Not You Hit Your Goals

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Welcome to day one of Golden Week. Today we are talking about how to feel happy. Whether or not you're hitting your goals. Let us actually just jump right in. Amber, I have a question for you. Why don't our goals make us happy?

This is such a beautiful question, and the answer might surprise a lot of people because you nailed it. Setting and reaching goals in and of itself does not bring joy. In fact, the opposite sometimes happens. We hit that goal, sadness overwhelms a lot of people. And there is research to back this. And we're going to link that up here in the comments of this video for anyone who wants to dig deeper into it. So what we want to look at is not, okay, I'm going after that goal. I'm going after that goal. When I get there, everything's going to change. Everything is going to be better. What we want to instead do is find joy and happiness along the way. And whether or not we reach that goal, joy will flow your way because you have a different approach to set and, and reaching your goals. And it is so interesting because dopamine is flowing. We want to set goals. Yes, you still want a goal because dopamine is flowing. Happiness comes up when we are making progress toward a goal. And there are some strategies around the kinds of goals we want to set. But you are still going to want to set goals and you are going to want to monitor your progress to those goals because this is where we are going to find the joy. Find the joy. And it's cheesy as it sounds, Shay, we're going to find the joy in the journey.

I agree 100%. It's so important for us to do that.

It is so one question that comes up often as I am thinking through these strategies. Well, goals don't bring us joy. Like, okay, tell me again, why are we setting these goals and why am I going to start. Start with happiness. How do these things fit together? Well, when we set goals and plan, I already shared a little bit that joy in the journey. You're making progress to those goals and you're tracking that progress. You're more likely to experience joy and you are more likely to get where you want to be going. Now, there are a couple of other components I want you to weave into your goals. I want them to be meaningful goals. I want you to create a plan to get where you want to be going. And yes, you do actually have to set those goals. So you want to go through a season and a strategy goal setting. But what also happens is that when people plan and set these goals and they're meaningful to you, they matter to you. People reach those goals above and beyond those who set no goals, clearly, or who set goals and don't make a plan or don't engage some of these other strategies that we're talking about. So there's a lot of benefit. Yes. To still setting goals.

Awesome. I love that. Now, one more thing I wanted us to talk about is as we're thinking about setting these goals, what happens when we are starting from a place of being happy with these goals or happy with the setting the goals versus the oh, I have to set goals again.

To set goals. Yeah. I love this. Number one, if your goals bring you down, if they feel like a weight, they might not be the right goals. We are living in a time where there's a lot of data coming in at us. The social media platforms we hang out on, our attention keeps those platforms alive. So they're going to, we're going to do everything we can. The news sources phone pinging with news alerts. Right. Everywhere is knows, all the businesses know that. Okay. We want attention, we want your attention because you coming back keeps things flowing. And it's so true. And we've got to start looking internal. We've got to say, hey, there's all this good stuff out here and that might be good for Shay and that might be good for Amber and that might be good for Jenny and that might be good for Harper. But what do I want? And you've got to align first and foremost your goals with what is important to you. And this is going to be, we've. We're already infusing and talking about some of the strategies that you're going to weave through to start happy. But what happens when we start with some of these happiness principles in mind when we're moving towards our goals and setting our goals, is that confidence goes up. Right? Okay. I feel good about this. I can do this. And there are so many different sayings out there that show if you think it, if you believe it, you can do it, it will happen. I mean, name the same, right? And so, ok, I believe there is absolutely research that supports people who believe they can reach their goals are more likely to do it. And I'm talking about the research because we know these things, Shay, from our life, but we like to back it up here at Stay golden with principles in research. So it's not just us, but there's research to back all of this. And so when you believe you can reach that goal and you set a goal. Ok? I'm setting this goal from a place that is important and that matters to me. I believe I can do it. So my confidence level is going up. You can already start to see how you're more likely to reach that goal. In addition, when we come at our goals from this place of happiness, in this place of optimism, not blind optimism, but realistic optimism, we are more likely to bounce back when things don't go our way. And I can tell you, we all know you're going to have a day, you're going to have a week, you're going to have a month where things aren't going your way. But if you root it in the things we're talking about, use your goals with joy and optimism and confidence, and you believe you will bounce back. You may not bounce back as fast as you want to all of the time, but you will bounce back faster. You will be able to step into that goal again with purpose, and you will get at it. One of my favorite things to know on the optimism side is that in the book Learned Optimism, they talk about research that supports sales professionals who are optimistic outperform those people who are not optimistic by leaps and bounds. Because as a salesperson, I mean, think about it, you're gonna hear a lot of no's. So you really gotta believe you've got to have a lot of hope that you're gonna bounce back. Like, I got this, I got this. They said, no, no, I got this, I got this. I believe I can do it. So that optimism in fact increases sales. If you're in a sales role or you're running a business, people are more productive when they're optimistic. Over the lifetime of your career, you will likely more money, you will live longer. The benefits of this go so far, and it goes far beyond the goals that we're talking about, but they're also going to support you reaching your goals. So this is why we want to start from this place of happiness. It doesn't always mean it's a smile, right? But. But I'm talking about that intrinsic, meaningful, deep satisfaction that we want to build our goals and our lives upon.

Oh, that was so beautifully said, Amber. And I just want to add one small thing. I find that on the mornings that I choose that happiness, where I choose those activities that will bring me a teensy bit more joy, and that I show up from a place differently, my energy shows up different, and my family feels it around me, which I think is also really important.

Oh, my gosh.

So good.

So Spot on. And Shea, you know, I love that you mentioned choose happiness, right? It's a choice every day to choose the energy, how we want to show up, how we want to connect. And if for you who are hanging out with us here today in Golden Week, I would guess that you want to walk down that path if reaching our goals with a little bit more joy. The last several years have showed us there is a better way and there is a better way. And one of the questions that comes to mind for me is that we want to walk through together. This week is ok. Ok. Ok. I want to start from that place of happiness. What are those things that bring me happiness? And to that we say, you know, you know what brings you happiness, Shay and I do not have to tell you, we have all sorts of strategies in our toolbox from positive psychology that amp up and increase our happiness. But we want to start with what you know and you know. When I say what makes you happy, something comes to mind and I want you to hold on to that for just a second and she I am going to pass it back to you for the Golden Game. Yes.

I am so excited to tell you about today's Golden Game. We are going to have you select one happiness activity that you will spend a little time on throughout this year and really just choose that happiness for you. So comment beneath this video, Share with us what you're choosing so that we can give you some sunshine, so we can give you some love and so that you can give some sunshine to others. Now, if you also want to join in on our bonus step, we would love to have you in our program, Stay Golden. We want you to complete the rise and and reflect chart which is inside of Stay Golden. The link below you can click Enroll if that's what you're feeling called to. Otherwise, for now, choose your happiness activity and share it with us. We want to support you in your Golden Week.

We so want to support you and because we want to support you and we believe in you so much and if you take these steps, we know you're going to see progress. We were playing a game this week and we are playing to win. We love to play to win. When you show up, you are going to win and once in your life and we are going to sweeten the pot. This week and every day in Golden Week there will be a winner that we will announce. So follow the link below to make sure you're registered for Golden Week. Comment below to be entered to win for today's prize and we'll be back tomorrow with our next step in the Golden Week journey. Bye.