The Art of Badassery: Jenn Cassetta’s Journey to her Dream Life

Everyone starts out from where they're at, right? And not everyone starts out at the same starting place. So I look back and think, when I was coming up, there was no social media. There was no way to share my message like there is today. There was no way to learn how people were doing it right in such an easy way where now there's like TikToks and constant information coming at us. There was no LinkedIn, there was no, you know, I couldn't look. At some point I would look at Tony Robbins, say, how did he do it? But other than that, there wasn't like thousands of people to watch their journey and see how they were doing it.

You are in for a treat today. In this beautiful podcast episode, we've got Jen Casetta, a nationally recognized speaker, empowerment coach, self defense expert, and author of the new book the Art of Badassery. Unleash your mojo with wisdom of the dojo. Equipped with her third degree black belt and master's degree in nutrition, Jen has spent the last two decades helping people feel strong, safe and powerful. From the streets to the boardroom. With clients that include Apple, American Express, British Airways, Nike, Uber, Jennifer has rocked hundreds of stages across the country with her superpower combination of of engaging content and contagious enthusiasm. Her skills have been featured on the Today show, the Doctors, Rachael Ray, and she was a featured expert on ABC TV's My Diet is better than yours. Are you kidding me? This is a beautiful conversation with insights that are going to apply both to your life and to the beautiful business and career you are building. I cannot wait to get hear what you think. Let's do this. Jen, welcome to the podcast. I'm so excited to be speaking with you. Thanks for being here.

Thanks for having me. Amber.

Oh my gosh. I was telling you that I dove into your work a little bit and I was so excited because I did a self defense class two weeks ago.

Oh, how?

Yeah, as I was seeing your stuff, I'm like, I just did this. This makes so much sense. I was not planning on doing it, but my husband said no. He had done a course by the company that was putting it on before.

And he's like, they're really good.

First tell us about what you do and how you got into this.

Yes, absolutely. So self defense is definitely one part of my work, my business, my passion. I kind of want to hear more about your experience though. Did like, will you tell us how you felt?

Totally. I'll tell you everything.

So for 23 years ago, I stepped into a Dojo, a martial arts studio in New York City for the first time and fell madly in love. Then a huge event happened in the world, which shifted my whole life. We can talk about that in a minute, but I'll get through this. And then I decided that I wanted to basically help as many other people, feel strong, safe, and powerful that I was starting to feel in the dojo. So how could I do that at the time? In my early 20s, I became a personal trainer. Later on a health coach, later on a nutritionist. And then so that happened for about 10 years and for the next 13 and into. What I'm doing now is essentially taking that to a pretty broader stage. So doing public speaking, training for corporations on self empowerment, self improvement. There's so many words and phrases out there that sum it up. But essentially, I want to help more women feel strong, safe, and powerful. From the streets to the boardroom.

Oh, my gosh, that gives me goosebumps. Because the strong, safe and powerful bim, like, yeah, you know, self defense class, top of mind. I don't ever want to have to use any of that.

I don't want you to either.

Exactly. And also, I think that song Strong, safe and powerful. I'm in a book club right now, and we're reading a book on healing. And last night in book club, I had this realization, like, oh, actually, it's been a building, growing realization. I'm like, you've been in survival mode, and you don't have to be in survival mode anymore. Again, life happens and things go on. You don't have to live like that. What does it feel like? I'm like, oh, so those words. Strong, safe and powerful.

Right. And the safety part, you know, I think a lot of us gloss over that. And I think what you're touching on is safety is a feeling that we can create versus thinking that we have no control over our safety. And that's the part that I really want women to remember is that we do have some control over our safety. We can enhance our feeling of psychological safety, mental safety, as well as physical safety.

Oh, I love this. Because from, like, looking at the budget to thinking about, you know, running a business and what are we going to do next and career and family and living abroad. There are a lot of places where, like, oh, I would like to feel safe and secure in all of these places, even though there's a lot of uncertainty.

Oh, yeah. Financial safety. I mean, that's a huge one for women.

Yeah. And to end health, I'm just. Actually, I'm Running through a whole bigger like. And I've got. There's health stuff that comes up and then there's that and there's that. So how do you enhance this feeling of safety when everything feels hard?

Yeah, I think the first step in that is kind of comes with personal responsibility. And not to put that in like, oh, it's on us to feel safe. Well, it kind of can start with us. Right. And again, I don't want anyone to misconstrue what I'm saying, because in the world of physical safety, obviously anyone that is a predator, anyone that is harassing women, abusing women, verbally, mentally, sexually, physically, any way is in the wrong. Right. And it shouldn't happen. However, we live in a world where patriarchy rules and this happens. So I feel like our responsibility is just taking that as fact. Like that is the world we are living in today. Hopefully it will change in the future. But I'm probably not going to be around. You're probably not going to be around until that happens. So in the meantime, what can we do to enhance our personal safety? So it starts with that kind of personal responsibility in all areas of your life. So if we're talking about money and finances, it's the same thing. Well, I'm not going to rely on someone else to make sure that I'm financially secure. No, I am responsible for me, only me. And then I could take steps to set that up in the future.

Yeah. And do you think that, like, are there some core tenants that you can put in place to get that feeling of safety? Because I wonder what your thoughts on this. But as I'm thinking through this, I'm like, okay, if I feel safe, I can feel stronger and more powerful. Right. And I know it may be different for finance versus physical safety versus Right. But how do you step forward into that?

I love it. So that basically is the book and I could do real high level of the different steps that it walks through. The book is laid out as a martial artist walks from white belt to black belt. So each chapter is white, yellow, orange, color coded where black belt is the goal.

So.

So white belt is about embracing the suck, getting on the mat, getting knocked down, knowing that life is going to throw you challenges, there are going to be opponents. If we're talking about physical safety, there are predators in the world. Right. Embracing the facts, embracing the suck of your life, the seasons of suck that you've been through or maybe going through right now in order to move forward. Right. So it's not wishing it were Different. It, it's not placing blame on everyone else. It's just accepting that this happened or this is happening and I am capable to move through it and move past it. Yellow belt then helps you move past it by. It's called bounce back and it gives you three strategies on how to move through or how to get back up after anybody takes you down, anybody, anything. And I can keep going. But essentially then it's about blocking the negativity, protecting your peace and power, learning those styles of blocks, communicating them in a powerful way, protecting your chi, your life force energy through self care, going within. Now you're starting to slow down and become more mindful and use discernment in your life. And then black belt level, of course, is about leadership and how we take a stand for now, not just ourselves, but other people and causes in the world.

Goosebumps. So good, so good.

Thank you.

Okay, I want to dive more into this idea of the chi, your life force energy. Can you tell us more about that?

Yes, at about blue belt level in my training. So again, I was young, in my 20s and starting to just hear more about this word chi, chi, ki in Korean Qi, depending on what language you're speaking. But essentially Eastern cultures believe that we have this life force energy that keeps us vibrant and alive. They also believe that your Qi can be depleted essentially over time if you're not actively taking care of it. And I started to think like, wow, that's so interesting. They have all these systems like Tai Chi and qigong to that not only help you be more aware of your Qi, but actually help generate more of it. And I was like, how in the States do we not even acknowledge that this life force energy exists?

Yes.

I mean, right?

How? How? It's mind boggling to me. Yes.

Right. So but yet we have a word for when it's completely depleted, which is burnout. And now that everyone's realizing what that feels like. So without having to dive super deep into learning Tai chi or qigong or the whole philosophies, it could be broken down pretty simply into self care. Right. Things that we're doing probably mostly when we're stressed out that are depleting our chi, things like over caffeinating, relying on too much sugar or alcohol, or things that we think are fueling us or numbing us to get us through, but over the long term, they're really just wearing out our adrenal glands. They're pumping out too much stress hormones in our body. And over time we start to feel more and more depleted. And. And we wonder why. So it's simple. Things like that. And not to say any of those things are bad or wrong. There's probably room in everyone's life for caffeine, for sugar, for alcohol. But the difference is. Or the discernment is you're running it and it's not running you.

Yeah.

And then on the opposite side is there are energy gaining habits like fueling our bodies with a proper nutrition, hydration, sleep and rest. Positive people getting out into nature. Simple, simple things that sometimes we take for granted.

Mm, it's so true. And this idea of burnout, discernment, right. I've been looking at my colleagues, my team members, my clients lately. I'm like, man, we do not have a problem finding things to do. Like, life just keeps happening. We're like, okay, we gotta take care of that, Gotta take care of that. Okay, add that to the tulip too. Get that? Did we get that done yet? Right. It just keeps coming. So this idea of discernment, like, as you're evaluating, how do I want to live my life? Where do I want to spend my time? What do I need to focus on? What do I need to do? How do you. How do we pull this through in everyday life?

I'm sure you're a master at it. Because when I'm thinking of someone like yourself with three children and businesses and clients and all of that, you're probably using discernment all the time. Maybe just not, you know, super conscious of it. But if you think about it, you know, everyone is discerning where they spend their time. Everyone's discerning where they spend their energy, being, you know, self aware of that and actually choosing. Really, really choosing is important for your business, for your life, for your well being in general.

Yeah, I, I like to think I'm good at it. But some weeks are better than others.

Like, oh, of this week, like, oh.

I got that Friday deadline. I got this Wednesday deadline. There just are not enough hours. So sometimes it's just block and tackle, block and tackle. Like, and today I wasn't gonna go. I've gotten in a really good routine here. In my movement, I use the word movement instead of exercise because I had some resistance to begin. Like, I just have to move. And so I've gotten in a good movement routine. And the person I've been working with leaves in less than 90 days. And they, they move. It's gone, it's over. I'm gonna have to figure out new routines. But I wasn't gonna go. My husband Today said he's like, oh, I can go this morning. His schedule worked. I'm like, oh, well, if you're going, I gotta go. And I was like, you got deadlines. I don't know how this is gonna work. I just know it's gonna work right on time. I'll work out, I will come home, I'll shower, I'll get ready, and then I'll get a jump start on my day. Jen. I was going to meditate, to recharge for 20 minutes. I get that in. I probably heard one minute of my meditation and I napped for an hour and a half.

Wow. You needed it. I needed it. Yeah.

I don't know how this is all gonna fit. Somehow it's gonna fit.

Yeah, yeah. That's 23. When I nap, when I used to nap that long, my sister would say, that's not called napping. That' called going back to sleep.

Especially in the morning.

That's a good point. All good.

Nice call, sis. Oh, that's great. I'm so loving this. I want to ask you about, and then I'm going to share too on my self defense. I've got, I've got some stories in there, but you mentioned that there was an event that shifted your life. Can you tell us about that?

Yeah, absolutely. And not only mine, but probably tens of thousands or more people around the world, but mostly in New York City and D.C. on September 11, I was living in New York City and working three blocks south of the World Trade Center. When I got into the subway, nothing was wrong in the world. And when I got out at Wall Street, I looked up and you know, black smoke is billowing out of the towers. Obviously everyone's like confused and screaming and pointing. And I just go to my place of work. The doorman won't let me upstairs, but he says, you can use the phone in the lobby. And thankfully, because I stepped in, dialed my mom's phone because I'm like, I guess I'll call her. And within seconds, the first tower fell. So a swarm of people come, you know, barreling into the lobby. I get pushed into a utility closet with this bunch of strangers. And for the first time in my life, that absolute panic set in. And I froze, like, couldn't move my body. Just remember crying. Until this woman came over to me, put her hands on my shoulders, asked me my name, which forced me to take a breath and kind of move me out of that frozen state. Jennifer, she said, jennifer, I'm Nancy. And the two of us were going to get out of here today. And it was like I had just met my guardian angel of the day. And the two of us, sure enough, we got evacuated from the building. We were running for hours together looking for safe places, kept getting kicked out of different places until finally I had the idea to take Nancy to the dojo, the martial arts school I'd been training at that year. So for the first time that day we arrive, I start to, you know, breathe more deeply, relax a little bit, understand what's happening. And you know, this became this safe place, like our little refuge for me. And, you know, the moral of the story is that I basically wanted to spend as much time as there after the events, obviously I was definitely shooken up for a few days, went out of the city. When I came back, all I wanted to do was go to those mats, you know, get out of my street clothes, put on this crisp white uniform, just focus, mind, body, spirit on the task at hand. Punch, you know, kick, sweat, leave it all on the mat and go home. And that really started this complete love, desire, passion of this, this new practice that I had in my life. Wow.

Oh my gosh. Nancy and you taking her to that. Oh, oh my gosh. And this is. So when did you shift away from corporate into this journey that you're now on? Speaking publishing.

Yeah, it's funny. So I really never, I feel like I say this, I never had a corporate job. I had a corporate job for like a year and a half out of college, then a couple of different things. And then when I was working near the World Trade center, it was for an event space where I was going to be doing event marketing. So not really corporate. But after that, building was shut. So I lost my job on that day and I was bartending to pay the bills for a while until I figured out, well, I love this martial arts, how can I earn money doing this? And someone said, well, why don't you just come to this gym, this boutique gym in the West Village and become a personal trainer. I was like, okay. So there was no like plan. Being that young, you know, I wish I could look back and say, you know, you could have planned it out a little better. But at the same time I just kept saying yes to different opportunities and getting different certifications to help me up level my career, up level my business. But essentially I've been running my own business for 22 years now.

Oh my gosh. And you've spoken at on stages of companies, brands that we know use, engage in. How did you get some of Those first deals, how did you break into that space?

Well, so when I was out here in LA and I had that vision of public speaking, which the seed was planted even back in my 20s, I was doing a lot of self development work, going to Tony Robbins, like I say, concerts, conferences, loving it, soaking it in and just thinking, like one day, if I could just do a sliver of that kind of work, have a sliver of that kind of impact on folks, like that would make me a really happy person, you know. So I started on college campuses in about 2014 and taking my self defense. You know what's easy for me? Well, teaching self defense. Okay, let me take it to college campuses. A lot of sorority women, where it could really be beneficial. And I started doing trainings on campuses. But then I realized there's this whole speaking market. So if I just took my same information, dressed it up, put on a blazer and a pair of heels, all of a sudden I can kind of 10x my revenue, increase the perceived value of what I'm teaching and now call it more of safety and self defense or sexual assault awareness and self defense. And then from there I said, well, if I could do this for the college market, I could do it for corporate too. Started doing that and then started developing different programming as well. So the art of badassery was born as a keynote in about 2017. 18.

Oh, my goodness. Ah, I love your journey. You said something in there, or you said, you know, what would make me happy if I could do. Oh, that's the question I came up.

With because you said if I could.

Do a sliver of that, that would make me happy. And you asked this question, what would make me happy? This would make me happy. And then you followed each nut. Yeah, yes, yes, yes. To opportunities as they unfolded, which is, I mean, part of this journey as we're looking back. Like, it's incredible how things just line up so, so beautifully. Was this an unexpected journey for you? As you look back now, you're like, no, that was exactly the path that I intended. Or how do you look back on it?

I look back knowing that I'd be doing what I'm doing now. I just didn't know how I would get there and I didn't know how long it would take. I think that's the biggest thing is, is the length. And sometimes I go, well, we compare ourselves to others, which is not a great habit. I understand that. And I see sometimes younger folks, what it seems to me as getting to where I'm at more Quickly getting the book out, getting on stages, doing these things. And, you know, I beat myself up for a few minutes and then I go, look, everyone starts out from where they're at. Right? And not everyone starts out at the same starting place. So I look back and think, when I was coming up, there was no social media. There was no way to share my message like there is today. There was no way to learn how people were doing it. Right. In such an easy way where now there's, like, TikToks and constant information coming at us. There was no LinkedIn. There was no, you know, I couldn't look at someone. I would look at Tony Robbins, say, how did he do it? But other than that, there wasn't, like, thousands of people to watch their journey and see how they were doing. It makes sense.

Yeah, it totally makes sense, man. And you said something in there. I lost it. But it reminded me of the bounce back. Like, okay, how many do you. Did you have moments on this journey when you're like, okay, set back, bounce back, set back.

Hundreds. Yes. I think every entrepreneur does, don't you think?

Yeah. What would be. What was one of the most challenging.

I would say, besides the financial challenges of, like, trying to make this work on my own for so long, would be, I was on this reality TV show. For me, it's always like, these things that feel like they're going to be life changing, right? It's like, oh, this is going to get me to that next level, whatever that means. So I audition, and I wind up being chosen to be on this reality TV show. It's on ABC tv, blah, blah, blah. I'm thinking, okay, Jillian Michaels, watch out. I'm, you know, I'm coming. And to make a very long story short, I essentially had the client, right? There was, like five or six of us that were the weight loss experts, and then we each had our client. And, you know, on every reality TV show, there's one person that always has, like, the biggest drama. Well, that was the client. They paired me with, and I really tried my best. We got along for weeks. I'm down in Atlanta filming. And to make a long story short, she just, like, lost it and lost it on me, and then I lost it on her, and then she quit the show, and I technically got fired from the show on the second to last episode. So when it aired months later, I'm, like, cringing, thinking, like, this is it. My career's over. I'm going to be the laughing stock, the health and fitness world. And sure enough, when it did air. It wound up being. There was a definite silver lining, which was people were reaching out to me, thanking me for bringing a different conversation to weight loss. And the conversation that I brought to weight loss was that it was more about mindset than it is about exercise and, you know, nutrition.

Yes. Oh, my gosh. What was the name of the show? Because I feel like I watched it.

It was called My Diet is Better than Yours.

Oh, maybe I didn't. I'm gonna look. Everybody go look for this.

John T. Was the host. He was. If you know him from.

Yeah, of course.

Beachbody. Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I feel like I did watch this. Oh, my gosh. This is wild. You have, like. I'm just thinking about you saying yes. Like, things are folding. Okay. Yes. Try that. Try this. Do you have any other. Like, would that be your top story? What's your favorite story?

I mean, there's so many. You know, it always feels like there's peaks and valleys. Another peak was that I was traveling around the world with a private client, Right. A Saudi billionaire, super nice man. I trained his family, his colleagues. We traveled to Africa, to Asia, all over Europe, South America. I mean, it was like a year and a half of on and off travel. That was like a dream come true. A seed that I had planted, you know, in my subconscious mind years before at a Tony Robbins event, saying that travel will be part of my work. And I loved it. And then, of course, that came to an end, and it was kind of a sad ending, you know, like, so there's. Again, I just kept saying yes to the opportunities, and then certain opportunities don't work out in the way you think they're going to. And that's okay because I still have that lived experience.

Oh, my gosh. Okay, I have two questions. One easy, one, maybe harder. Favorite. Well, this is two part. One question. Favorite place to travel, Favorite place that you've been around the world.

I would say Italy. I'm just. It's, like, in my DNA, and I feel very just at home there. I love it so much. And great food. Best food.

Yeah. Great food. Yeah.

Yeah.

You can't go wrong. I really like Italy also, but now I'm. I'm a little partial to Africa, obviously.

And I love South Africa.

Okay. I was gonna say favorite place in Africa. South Africa.

Yeah. Cape Town is so beautiful. It's like California. The. The weather and the temperament, so.

But so much more.

So much more.

Tabletop Safar. Yeah. Okay.

Outdoor adventures, hiking, the. All the things that I love.

Okay.

Good.

That was the easy question. Harder one. You mentioned your subconscious. You planted the seed and in your subconscious.

Yeah.

Well, how does this work? How do we make the subconscious work for us?

It's always working for us. It's always whether you're feeding it not so positive things, you know, your fears, then it's going to attract more of those fears. And I say this with a, not with a grain of salt. I believe it to be 1000% true. I say it with humbleness because I have had to do so much work on my subconscious on planting those positive seeds because I've lived with a lot of doubt. I've lived with a lot in those positive seeds because I've lived with a lot of doubt. I've lived with a lot of doubts in my abilities, doubts in my credentials. I'm not smart enough. I don't have this all the things imposter syndrome. I don't belong here. You know, especially traveling with. Can you imagine traveling with a billionaire and walking into these places like I don't belong here and then having to say to myself, I do belong here, I belong here. I belong here. So just things like that where I'm constantly recognizing my negative thoughts, my self doubt and doing my best, which is not always the best, but doing my best to plant the positive seeds and really focus and spend more time, right. More time and energy on actually focusing on the things that I want to bring forward into my life. So every morning in my meditation, I move right into a visualization process where I visualize the life that I am bringing forth. And I don't even say that without any doubt, like I am bringing this forth.

And this begins the shift from those negative thoughts that are popping up and in our subconscious with what we want and what we are becoming.

Becoming. Yeah, absolutely.

That's so good. I'm going to do this. So I mentioned I've got like, I have this realization that, okay, you got some survival mode stuff happening. And I was speaking with a kinesiologist that I work with last night and she's like, man, this story, this has been playing for a while. Like, yes. And we pinpointed when in my life it started really happening. Eight years old.

And then that's usually the age there's where the first thing happens, right? The first big. Yeah.

And then she's like, where in your life still are you in survival model? Like, well, I just looked at my budget yesterday. Feel there. Like, and I'm pointing out some things and you know, am I doing well? Yes, but I feel this gap between where I am and where I know there's a potential, where I have a desire, where I have a calling, where I have this nudge, this right on time nudge that keeps. So I am gonna. I meditate. Highly recommend. This was a hard thing for me to do. Is it? Was it hard for you to build your meditation practice?

Oh, yeah. I mean, so all those years in the dojo, we practice meditation, but I never took it home with me. That was the difference. So I did it there, but I didn't do it at home. I acted like I didn't have time. And it wasn't until really five, six years ago that I truly dedicated a daily practice to it. And yes, it's hard, just like going to the gym every day or building your biceps or you know, like, because it takes practice and then you only start to really. And I'm using air quotes for listening. Get good at it. Meaning that you can just drop into it pretty quickly. That takes practice. So it's not going to happen at first and you're thinking you're doing it wrong. And you're thinking it's never going to work. And you're thinking, you know, this is a waste of time. But once you hit a groove, I truly believe that you pick up time in your day, you become more efficient, you make better choices, you use better discernment, you don't get angry or reactive as quickly. So you're saving time and energy throughout your life. The more that you dedicate to the meditation practice.

Oh my gosh, this reminds me. Well, my meditation practice, I've done it like on and off over the years. But similarly, it didn't really sink in for me until actually about five years ago when I was in Ethiopia and we were living in Addis Ababa. And I'm like, you know, my mornings are quiet, the kids go to school, get them ready, get them off, and I've got this space before clients start waking up. And like, this is your time. You gotta like keep this space sacred and practice your meditation. And that's when I really started sinking into it. And then when I was in Sedona. Have you been to the Sedona Vortexes? Yes, that was where I was like, oh, that is like dropping into it fast. That was wild.

Yeah. Did you see a guy named Robert or something? And he gives out heart shaped rocks and he plays a flute on top of the.

I didn't hear it. Bell rock. I didn't see him there.

Okay, that's just random. Sometimes I Ask people that and they're like, yes, I saw that guy.

Everybody, if you go to Sedona to meditate at the board, watch for what was his name?

I think it's Robert, but you'll notice he's. He's playing a flute on the top of like a giant rock.

I love that. Oh, my goodness. And then so meditation, visualization. Do you have a visualization that you do? Because I have visualized in the past, believe in it, like all the things visualization. But as you said, I'm dropping into it fast. That was wild.

Yeah. Did you see a guy named Robert or something? And he gives out heart shaped rocks and he plays a flute on top of the.

I didn't hear it. Bell rock. I didn't see him there.

Okay. Sometimes I ask people that and they're like, yes, I saw that guy.

I'm like, you know, I really haven't made a decision. And define like, what do I want to be visualizing to? But I need to like, things are clearing. It's coming. So I've got to pull this practice back up. How do you embrace and walk through the visualization?

What I've learned is that it's less about. Well, you put yourself in a situation that you want, right. So whether it be the home that you want to be living in, the people surrounding you, all of that stuff is great. But truly it's about the feeling that you want to be feeling. So if you had the house, if you had the income, if you had.

Everybody, if you go to Sedona to meditate at the board, watch for what was his name?

I think it's Robert. But you'll notice he's. He's playing a flute on the top of like a giant rock.

I love that. Oh, my goodness. And then so meditation, visualization. Do you have a visualization that you do?

Because I partner the family, whatever it is that you want, how would you feel?

Yeah.

Once you can answer that question, feel those feelings and then the visualization becomes a little easier. But you're aligning your vibration. Right. I usually don't get to talk about this stuff on other people's podcasts, so.

I love that we're have visualized in the past, believe in it, like all the things visualization. But as you said, I'm like, you know, I really haven't made a decision. And define like, what do I want to be visualizing to step. But I need to like, things are clearing. It's coming.

Are you able to talk about this, Amber? Thank you. I'm such a big believer and in the power of all.

So I've got to pull this practice back up. How do you embrace and walk through the visualization?

This, you know, the power of your subconscious mind. So. And without even having to be too woo woo about it, if you think about it, if you're constantly focusing your mind on something, right, you're going to be drawn to do the things that it takes to get there. So it's not magic. Manifestation is not magic by any means. It's being in alignment with the things that you want to occur and then actually getting into action and doing them.

Yeah, so true. And you're right.

What I've learned is that it's less about. Well, you put yourself in a situation that you want, right. So whether it be the home that you want to be living in, the people surrounding you, or all of that stuff is great. But truly, it's about the feeling that you want to be feeling. So if you had the house, if you had the income, if you had the.

When I first read the Law of Attraction years ago, the first edition, I was like, I just. So I just think it and then it happens, like, well, okay, now there's a little bit more to it and there is a lot of research around it because I love to like, all right, this is what I'm hearing, this is what I'm practicing, this is what I'm seeing.

I.

But is there data research to support it? And there is like, what you believe, what you want to happen.

If you don't believe the partner, the family, whatever it is that you want, how would you feel?

Yeah.

Once you can answer that question, feel those feelings and then the visualization becomes a little easier. But you are aligning your vibration. Right. I usually don't get to talk about this stuff on other people's podcasts, so.

I love that we're your chances of actually getting there. Okay, so how do we step into the belief? And this is part of that. And what do you even want? Like, if we don't have a decision on what we're going after? There's a lot of research around this. So I'm a little bit obsessed with everything that you are throwing out here.

I have another able to talk about this. Amber. Thank you. I'm such a big believer and in the power of all this, you know, the power of your subconscious mind. So. And without even having to be too woo woo about it, if you think about it, if you're constantly focusing your mind on something, right. You're going to Be drawn to do the things that.

So I have a question for you. And it ties my experience with self defense. My self defense program.

Yeah.

Wait, first, what did you love about like when you first went to the dojo and you first experienced it, what was your reaction?

Well, it's funny, my dad had been doing martial arts for over a decade at that point. And he was, he's like, he's passed on now. But my dad has always been my biggest cheerleader. Him and I were always into the self development. I got it from him. I would listen to his tape cassette tapes when I was little and you know, all the things. So Tony Robbins, Dale Carnegie, like all the pioneers, I would say of self help called what it takes to get there. So it's not magic. Manifestation is not magic by any means. It's being in alignment with the things that you want to occur and then actually getting into action and doing them.

Yeah. So true. And you're right. When I first read the Law of Attraction years ago, the first called it back then.

So he was a martial artist. And when I was in middle school and high school, I was like, that's corny. I want nothing to do with it. But for some reason I'm living in New York City, I'm on the subway one day, I'm like, you know, I'd really like to try it. It was more of a way to. I was bored of going to the gym and really to. To stay fit. So that was the idea. I had no idea.

Addition, I was like, I just. So I just think it and then it happens. Like, well, okay, now there's a little bit more to it and is a lot of research around it because I love to like, all right, this is what I'm hearing, this is what I'm practicing, this is what I'm seeing. But is there data research to support it? And there is like what you believe, what you want to happen if you don't believe.

Yeah, that my life would completely change from the benefits. And the benefits that are not just physical, they're mental, emotional, spiritual as well. There is mental. Yeah. So I started to feel really good. I remember like throwing my first couple punches and kicks and being like, gosh, this feels really good in my body. This is foreign to me. I've never done anything like this before. And all except for Taebo, which was a VCR tape at the time of working out.

I remember that.

Love him. Love Billy length. But yeah, it was new and different and felt really good. Empowering.

It's so true. My experience, I wasn't going to go to this class and my husband. Your chances of actually getting there. Okay, so how do we step into the belief? And this is part of that. And what do you even want? Like, if we don't have a decision on what we're going after and there's a lot of research around this, so I'm a little bit obsessed with everything that you are throwing out here. I have another been said. It's so good. You got to go, you got to go. Okay. And my daughter, my oldest daughter is here too. Like, oh, come with me. We both went and it was amazing how to your point? Yes, Empowering. And I've done like. Yeah, exactly. Taibo type stuff as well. I'm like, oh, man. But when you're hitting and someone is pushing back and you start to exert. So I have a question for you. And it ties to my experience with self defense, my self defense program.

Yeah.

Wait, first, what did you love about like when you first went to the dojo and you first experienced it, what was your reaction?

Well, it's funny, my dad had been doing martial arts for over a decade at that point, and he was very.

And like, oh, I do have this power within me and I can. And you know, it's funny because one of the instructors would really like, give it to us. Like, I want you to know what this is going to feel like and start to simulate those experiences and emotions. And that was the most empowering for sure. Like, okay, I got a couple skills, I got out of that. But then I come home and the kids are like, all right, let's test it out. I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing. Step away. Quit uncle.

He's like, he's passed on now. But my dad has always been my biggest cheerleader.

It's interesting because we practice and really this applies in many life situations. Like, you practice, you practice, you practice.

Him and I were always into the self development. I got it from him. I would listen to his tape, cassette tapes when I was little and you know, all the things. So Tony Robbins, Dale Carnegie, like, all the pioneers, I would say, of self help called what we just.

And then it's go time. And I now know I am not ready for go time. Like, you need more practice. You gotta keep this up.

Well, I have a couple things to say about that. One is, yes, you're right. I mean, obviously doing a class one time is not the, you know, the more you do it, the more you practice, the more you Embody it and it becomes more natural with anything. Yet called it back then. So he was a martial artist. And when I was in middle school and high school, I was like, that's corny. I want nothing to do with it. But for some reason, I'm living in New York City. I'm on the subway one day. I'm like, you know, I'd really like to try it. It was more of a way to. I was bored of going to the gym and really to. To stay fit. So that was the idea. I had no idea. I have plenty of stories of women being able to fight off an attacker with one class, with just the basics. But more so because it comes from the inner right, the primal instinct that once we know is there and is accessible to us, and we have the belief that we have that power that can make the difference in some cases, not in all. I don't want to.

You know, that makes so much sense because with my kids, I'm like, oh, I don't want to hurt you. I actually have to think through. Through this.

Yeah.

But if it were something like, oh.

Yeah, idea that my life would completely change from the benefits, and the benefits that are not just physical, they're mental, emotional, spiritual as well. There is just mental. Yeah. So I started to feel really good. I remember, like, throwing my first couple punches and kicks and being like, gosh, this feels really good in my body. This is foreign to me. I've never done anything I would be full on.

And again, this is in my subconscious now, and there are things that I know would just pull right out.

Mm, exactly.

Yeah, that's a very good point. They talked about something at this experience called getting off the X. Are you okay? So this is something where if you're going into a situation or you're in a situation, you're like, oh, you think like this before.

And except for Taibo, which was a VCR tape at the time of working out.

I remember that love him.

Love Billy Lanks. But, yeah, it was new and different and felt really good and empowering.

It's so true. My experience. I wasn't gonna go to this class, and my husband. My intuition is telling me that may not be good over there. Or you're right in the middle of it, and you're like, oh, my gosh. You know, I'm not gonna stick around to figure out what's going on. I'm just gonna get off the X.

Got it.

And this really sticks in my head. And it's funny. I had an experience actually just Three days ago, we were driving to our workout session and yelling. Lots of yelling, Lots of. Just chaos. Like, it sounded like a big crowd of people. We drive a little bit more, and in the past, I might have been like, oh, what's going on over there? Right. And. And just those little things that you pick up. And that was so interesting to me because wherever our intuition is dropping in, like, get off the X or what you have shown us in this episode, like, follow the yeses, like, follow those things that you're drawn to, right?

Oh, yeah. I mean, I think the more that you, again, meditate or have any kind of mindfulness practice, really, it doesn't have to be meditation. If you're out there thinking, like, I'm never going to meditate, this is not for me. There's something. Maybe you're a journaler, maybe you do a walking meditation. Whatever it is, the more you connect, unplug from the devices, connect with your inner intuition, the more it's available for you. And it's going to pull you towards people, places and things that light you up and it's going to turn you away from the people, places and things that drag you down.

Yeah. Oh, my gosh, Jen, I so love speaking with you. Thank you for this time.

Thank you, Amber. I appreciate this great conversation.

I. I love it. I love, love it. And I'm so excited for everyone to listen to this as well and know that people are going to want to learn more about you. Remind us, where do we find you? How do people connect with you? All the things.

Sure thing. So if you want to dig into the book that's available on Amazon, it's called the Art of Badassery. Unleash youh Mojo with Wisdom of the Dojo on Social Media. I'm Jen Cassetta. Two N's, two S's, two T's. Or actually, I'm a big fan of LinkedIn these days. So I'm there just at Jennifer Cassetta. Easy to find my website is my name jennifercassetta.com.

Linkedin'S Hoppin. Good.

I like it.

Yeah. I'm gonna go find you on LinkedIn.

Less trolling, less trolls, A little bit more focused.

Thank you again, Jen. So good to see you, Amber.

Thanks everyone for listening.