The BREW Method: Amy Reczek on Transforming Corporate Sales Communication

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50% of your clients are not a good fit. Half, half of your clients are not a good fit. That doesn't mean forever. That means right now. So offboard them as fast as you can so that you can give space to those that are. We tend to get on that hamster wheel because we're pushing the goal instead of being present. So shifting it that way also, to your point, gets you excited to even talk to somebody. So it's not this mundane, oh my gosh, I have to talk to them about this pitch that I don't, you know. It's a, it's heavy. Sales can be very heavy feeling. So it brings a little bit of that joy back into how do I, how do I just learn about what's happening in this person's world and their business? Then maybe I can support them and that would be awesome. Let's see how that goes.

Step into the world of success with Your Brand Amplified, the ultimate podcast designed to unravel the intricacies of thriving businesses. I'm your host, Anika Jackson, and I'm on a mission to uncover the stories, strategies, and secrets that have propelled entrepreneurs and business leaders to success. I am thrilled to have Amy Rezac from down the coast on the show today on Your Brand Amplified. So Amy, thank you so much for being here and thank you for letting us dive into some of the things we're gonna talk about today.

Yeah, I'm very excited. Thanks for having me.

Of course. So I'm going to just go right there because I think where we start and some of our origin stories are so important. Obviously, you're here because you are a certified body language expert. You are a corporate sales veteran. You talk a lot about nonverbal communication and you have two books, So You're in Sales and then Connect to Close, your latest book. But I also want to go back to those early days. You were born with congenital heart disease. You had 3 open heart surgeries when you were still a baby and a toddler, if you know, if that. So I know that sometimes that story can lead people in many different directions. I've met people who had health issues early in life and they kind of always fell into being that personality, right? And not progressing. And obviously you've done so much with your life. So can you talk a little bit about how that affected or how people around you, you know, how they acted around you affected who you are today?

Yeah. First I have to give you a shout out for bringing that up. Fabulous. So I have had 3 surgeries. I had 2 when I was little, one at 6 months and one at 2 years old. And my last one was 34 years old. I'm now 48, so I, I'll have to have more. It's a, it's a lifelong non-fixed condition, if you will. Congenital heart disease is. It's also the number one birth defect in the US for infants. So a child, one child every 15 minutes will be born with CHD. So, uh, I guarantee you listeners have met somebody with CHD and you probably just didn't even know it. So, you know, there's a lot of things with that growing up. You know, I have a big scar cuz I've had 3 surgeries. I know that that was something that I had to kind of overcome early. You know, I remember my mom telling me, Would never wear shirts that weren't like up to my neck because I was so nervous about the scar when I was little. And being a kiddo with those things is so difficult no matter what you have. So that was a lot. And then it's so much better now. There's so many advances now with things, but there's a lot of mental health that also goes into having a chronic illness. And it really was not recognized as I was growing up, so I dealt with a lot of unchecked anxiety. And then when I got to college, it really amplified because it was the first time I was on my own. I was 2 states away from home, 10 by 10 hour drive. So it was really isolated, you know, in the world all by myself all of a sudden. And so really recognized in my freshman year the power of counseling, the power of— I call them head meds. So depression meds, head meds, when we need them. Is really all really powerful tools. So I looked at it as lifting myself up and out instead of, oh, I have this, right? And that was more prevalent to me honestly, than the heart condition. And if anyone is watching this, you'll probably also be hyper-aware that I don't look like a heart patient. I just went in for like a regular physical the other day. And the doctor was like, you look You kind of look really good for a CHD. And I was like, oh my gosh. Okay, thanks. I'm trying, you know, but I think there are a lot of people walking around with really silent chronic illnesses that they're not prevalent. They're not super aware of that. Right. And so that was my whole life of not being able to run a mile in high school. Couldn't do it, could not breathe, but really, again, not really checking why, like it didn't correlate to me on, on the why behind that. I just felt less than, if you will. So I think that it didn't— the anxiety part of that and the depression part of that was more amplified than the actual condition. That said, I was pretty stable in my, my early years, so it didn't affect from my day to day, if you will, or others judging me, if you will, or coming at me at a different different way, and I guess I really don't care if they do. I have always been very stubborn from day one, and so if that's an issue for you, then you have bigger issues, I feel like, and that's not on me, and good luck, and I hope that you find what you need to find for that. But I really took it more as a superpower of, I technically am not supposed to be here. You know, my, I had a sister that died before me, a year before me. With a congenital heart defect, a different one, but a heart defect. Mine was one of the ones that early on was studied more, luckily, and they had a little bit more advances. However, when I was born, the percentage of living to 18 years old was still under 50%. So, you know, there's been so many advances after that. I'm pushing 50 now, stable right now. So it's pretty impressive to me of like, I have taken the mindset of, We only get one chance, so why not just do what we wanna do? Why not just show up when we wanna show up, change careers when we wanna change careers, dive into something that we're passionate about when we're passionate about it, take a break when we need it. Really, there's not enough of that. And I think that it peaks for people when there's a crisis or when there's a loss. So it's really clear in those moments, you know, like I've, I've lost parents. People close to me, obviously, and it comes clear. Your whole world becomes very crystal, if you will, in those moments. And then you, you're kind of like, okay. And that's where you see people making a lot of big changes sometimes too, is through those moments. And then it goes back to your day to day and the mundane, and you kind of get back into those old habits. Usually I have never fallen into that. I've always fallen into the what's next. What are we doing? And the, my medical condition is a direct driver of that.

Kudos to you because again, like I said, so many people let that, that get themselves down. They use it as an excuse. And the fact that you just said you use it as a driver, right? You use all the things that went along with your congenital heart disease as a driver and as something to figure out, okay, what am I gonna do to fix this? What is this going to propel me forward to do and to continue doing and to finding the joy and the purpose in it?

Yeah. And I will say too, I mean, for all those listening, I don't get me wrong, I have hard days, I have crap days, I have, gosh, I, I just can't move today, whatever that is. We all have those and that's part of life. So recognizing those things and recognizing seasons that we're in too. I always look at it as like, this is a learning season for me of maybe not taking on too much. And, and slowing it down a bit. Or maybe this is a learning season of, hey, I'm feeling pretty good, so I can ramp and, and make sure that we get in what I want to get in. It is very obvious to me that it may be tomorrow, because we just never know, that I may not be able to work anymore, that I may have something that kind of side swipes me a bit and I'm, and I'm offline. So what can I do now? What can I do while I'm here, while I'm feeling good, while I've Got the family. Well, we're living it. So it's a day-to-day, just like everyone else. It's a little bit more amplified.

Yeah. And, and you learn those things before most people do. I think most of us get to the point where we're working so much that we're starting to have health issues because we've ignored other things going on. I mean, I experienced some of that recently on a smaller scale, right, than obviously what you have had to experience, but just going through and going, oh, I probably just didn't even go to the doctor and, and get tested for any of these things because I'm a woman and we just think it's part of being, you know, and we just go, we're just going to keep on going through until we can't anymore. And so many times I have people on the podcast who talk about that inflection point, that pivot point, because they were in a corporate job and they had a health issue. And that's the moment that they have to change because they have a moment in crisis. So instead, you've chosen to be proactive about your life. So yeah, I'd love to hear a little bit about how this has shaped who you are personally and professionally and how you've made the decisions to get where you are today.

Yeah, I'm really great at winging it. I'll say that, you know, I don't think too much about the fallout of what if, you know, I, when I started in, in my career, my corporate career, I really just needed a job. I had a psychology degree, you know, I, I loved the communication connection. Driver of social science and what that is. However, I did not know what I was going to do with that or how I was going to pay bills with that. So I limped along for a while after college and then got a job in inside sales at the time, and then quickly moved into outside sales. And what I recognized on that was that I could tap into what I enjoyed. So I loved the communication side of that. I loved the connection side of that. Like, how do we dive in for your client, you know, you client success? How do I support you with that? How can we have mutual success together? And it was a really fun learning experience on how to level up what I just already was passionate about and then bring that into corporate. So I think, you know, one of the beautiful things about corporate is that there's going to be— I don't care what job you're in, there's going to be stuff you don't love. But there's, there are these moments and things that you can focus on that you really do love and that you're really passionate about, whether that's in-person connection and having more of that, or how you do your processes on the backend to support on the frontend, right? There's things that every one of us are really passionate about within the cycle of what we call corporate. And I really loved that. I loved that process. I loved having a team. I loved, I loved everything about sales and corporate. And then I kind of shifted. I was in that for 17-some years, moved from company to company at the time because, you know, companies sell and things happen and, and shifts happen. And then I really was like, I'm stuck. Then I came to my, I'm stuck. I'm not really feeling it anymore. I can't move up or I can't, I can't move at all. Like, I'll be in this position until I retire. I know that I'm not learning anything anymore. The people around me now are not leveling me up anymore. So it really was one of those like check myself of what am, what am I gonna do? There were a lot of tenured people were in the industry that I was in, phenomenal people who I watched be in this lifelong and then retire to it. And I still had so many years to go that I was like, is that what I want? Do I Do you still want to be the one wearing heels through the airport at like 55? And I was like, I don't think so. I just don't think so. Not in this capacity. And so I really took a minute to decide, okay, do I stay in corporate? Do I not? A couple of years prior, I was working with a career coach and she said, you'd be phenomenal at coaching. And I said, absolutely not. Never. And here we are now. So she really was the one who kind of put that nugget in my brain without me realizing it. And then fast forward when I was kind of shifting out, I was like, all right, let's have a conversation about this with her. Because my big thing was I didn't want to be out of corporate. Like, I need to bring something to corporate that's going to resonate with teams, with that type of setting still, because that's where I want to sit. So that's what we created. Created everything from what I knew, what I loved about my role, and within the nuances of a company, and then listed out everything I was missing. Not what I didn't like, everything I was missing. So that's a big thing. I think, you know, when we're shifting, when we're starting to feel that shift, it's really easy to focus on the things you don't like. Like, those become magnified. And I was like, I don't— you know, we're always going to not like things. Like, for example, in my company today, I finally have somebody else that does all of our PowerPoints. But for the first, like, 4 years, I was doing all the PowerPoints. And I have to tell you that, like, a glass of wine was always involved or a cup of coffee, like my favorite coffee. Like I had to— it was like trudging through water. I cannot— that is not me. So there are things we're not going to like, but it's like, what are those things I actually am missing that would still get me excited. If you think about the first couple years in your career, like, what was really exciting about that? And a lot of times it's the learning, it's the things coming at you in different angles. And so that's what I created kind of in this next chapter of these are the things I was missing that I wished I had in my career. And I just put it out to the world to see if it would work and if anybody else would resonate. And we're 7 years in. With a second book and it seems like they're resonating. So it's wonderful. Yeah.

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And Doug, there's nowhere I wouldn't go to help someone customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Liberty Mutual. Even if it means sitting front row at a comedy show.

Hey everyone, check out this guy and his bird. What is this, your first date?

Oh no, we help people customize and save on car insurance with Liberty Mutual together. We're married. Me to a human, him to a bird.

Yeah, the bird looks out of your league anyways.

Only pay for what you need at LibertyMutual.com.

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Yeah. And I think one of the things that we do as coaches is we take everything that we learned that was good and bad and all of the tests and iterations we had to do, and we help other people shortcut them, hopefully, at the best part of it. Because you were in the top 10 at your company, you were, you know, you had countless awards, but you still have said that you learned things the hard way. And so how has that helped you? Create your philosophy, which of course we want to talk about the Brew Method and some of the other things that you bring to the table. So what was it? I mean, you, you did perform fabulously. So what was it that you had to learn the hard way?

Everything. Everything beside product. Yeah. So, you know, now I look at it and I think it's amazing for this, these younger generations coming up. You can, you can get a degree in sales, which I think is fabulous. That did not exist. People when I was in college. So, you know, there's different elements now that are coming into play. I think that there's better training within how you communicate. That's getting out there. It's getting better. I know we obviously are part of that, but really the training, quote unquote training, you know, it's, it's like trial by fire when you're in sales. You either sink or swim really, and you figure it out on your own. And that's exactly what happened. So, You know, I got training on the products and the services and the pitch deck and all of those things, of course. But then in real time, it's much different. It is much different when you actually get someone asking you questions around, well, how would we pivot our entire team to do this? Right? Those are those real human elements that come into business where that's the trial by fire. That's the, jump in and, and sink or swim. And for me, what was interesting about that, and I had really great leaders in the beginning, I had a great team in the beginning, still there were gaps, right? So the very first time that I ever traveled, I was on my own. First time I was ever in person with large companies in like the center of, you know, downtown in a high-rise, all on my own, just hanging out. And I was like, so I really had to figure it out. And so what I leaned into was everything again that I, I really tapped into with the psychology side of things and the human experience and, and how we're going to do that together because I did not know what else to lean into. Everyone has their own story with that. Definitely the people that I worked with have their own story with that. They all figured it out too. You know, I worked with amazing people, but it's really kind of how you do that. And it's a human element exchange. It has nothing to do with product or service at the end of the day. It's really those, those small nugget things. So that was the trial by fire that I had where I kind of had to figure it out going forward. It also were those small nuggets and those gaps that we created to, to support and fill now for people.

Yeah. And one of those obviously is you learned that nonverbal communication was a huge part of this too. So was that during your corporate time? Is that when you decided to invest in learning more about that part of communication?

Yes and no. Yes and no. So I was a very quiet, curious child. I would always stay really quiet in a room and then ask 8,000 questions. And my questions were always, why was that person standing the way they were standing? Why were they wearing this? Why did they say it this way? So I was always kind of the geeky observer, if you will. And then my childhood throughout through college was on stage. So I'm trained in vocal and then was in theater for a long time, musical theater. And so that is where it actually really started. Did I know that at the time? 100% no. However, it really taught me things like positioning where my body is, things like, you know, how do we lean in in real time? Where are we shifting? The eye contact, the head movement, all of those things that are very specific to theater. And then in choir too, there's an element, although it's not discussed or even probably most people are unaware of it, there's a lot of elements in how you stand in a choir, you know. So if you're in a professional type choir, you will notice if you ever watch them, they do not move much. And that's a learned skill, I will tell you, especially for college students. I'm like, wait, we can't move at all. We can't move our hair. We can't shift. We can't. So all of that is a presence. That's what that is. That is focus. That is forcing you to be present in the moment when you are checked into yourself and your body language that's coming through. So I had all of that and was not really aware of that. I was actually doing that in real time until I started walking into these larger offices and recognizing Okay, there are certain elements of an office that I'm recognizing that I need to tap into every time I go in, which is when you walk out of the elevator, you're either in a hallway or you, you get dumped into the lobby of a client and there's always a front desk person or someone, security, something that you are immediately engaging with. So I recognized those things really early on of, I need to, these are gatekeepers. These are people that know so much that if you can be friends with them or if you can interact with them and impact in a great way, you're going to get some information. Now, I will say that needs to be authentic. Can't be inauthentic, but really leaning into that. So recognizing, oh, my meeting doesn't start when I finally get in the boardroom. My meeting is starting the first person I see and well before the meeting. And so really starting to tap into those movements and how I showed up and took space before I ever spoke really started coming into play. And then when I was creating the company and doing what we do now, one of the things that was really important to me is that I wanted to take the nonverbal and put that pretty center to what we do because it's such a high level of how we communicate. I needed to get certified in it though. If it was going to be a corporate element, I needed it to be a little, have a little bit of weight. And so that's where the certification comes in. I'm also going to get certified from a different company and person that is very well known in the fall, which is very exciting. So that will level that up as well. So we're continually in my state of I want to be curious and learning. I want to do that for me, but then it also benefits all the clients and everybody that we we come across to level that up. So, that's kind of the progress of how that came to be.

One thing I really noticed in the few minutes we've spent together is that you haven't been using my name in every sentence or every other sentence. And I love people who've been trained that way as traditional salespeople, but I don't like it. I feel like it's a much more genuine flow and conversation that we're having right now. And you're, I mean, I'm paying attention to every single word and just because your, your body contact, your eye contact, the way that you're presenting is impactful. So I just wanted to note that for those of you who are listening and are wondering if that's still a tried and true tactic.

Yeah, you and I so could have coffee on that for hours. That, so any, I would say this on any tried and true tactic, any one of them can be overused. So double-edged sword or flip of a coin for anything that is something that has been said to be useful or is a great tactic to use. Be highly mindful of the amount that you use it. I agree. I hear that all the time too, where my name is repeated over and over again, or, or thank you for that question. You know, and that's overused as well. The best way to balance that is to ask yourself if you would do that continuously with a close relationship, right? Because you would not. Yeah. So take it out. Take it out. Once in a great while is fine, but yeah, it's definitely one of those things that's highly overused in sales.

Thank you for confirming that for me. I would like to hear a little bit about the motivation between writing your first book and then deciding, ooh, there's something else that I still have inside me that needs to get out in print.

Yeah, the first book honestly came up because I was thinking, you know, I come from corporate, so I was thinking if I'm on the road, if I'm talking to clients, if I'm face-to-face, I need to leave behind. That was the corporate mentality, right? Uh, I'm sure lots of people can relate to that right now where you do not go into an office empty-handed. You have PDFs, you have books, you have whatever you have for a leave behind. If nothing else, a business card. And so it was a real, that was the mindset on that first one. It's just a quick small book and it has 3 key areas to cover on a high level. So it doesn't go real deep. And I will say I wrote it this, I think my second year of the company being in business, and I was still finding a lot of things. And so it's an early-on book. And then I was done with that. And I will say I'm not a, I'm not a natural writer. I'm not one that's like, oh, I would love to write a book. That has never been on my bingo card. Like you ask me, so you're gonna be incorporated, you're gonna own a company? No, I'm not. You're gonna write books? No, I'm not. Like those would all be a hard no, hard pass for me. But we had, going from that one to this, is that we had so much growth, not just within the company, but within the companies we were working with. So the growth that they had in our mutual success and our working with them, the stories that we started hearing from clients in working with them and putting some action behind some things, that's what generated this book. So we, we really took from client real life. We took from interactions that we were having with teams and corporate and the trainings that we do and the speaking that I do, took all of those things that we're really hitting over and over and over again that are just a constant within sales and business. And we put that into a methodology that's easy. And then one step further, because it always drives me nuts when you get a great theory and a great method, and then they're like, great, now go do it. And you're like, but how? How do I do that? Which is a lot. I think that the sales space is loud, and I did not want to add to just the loud of sales. And so we— I wanted the how in there, those micro moments, those 1% shifts. So we put that into the entire sales process. So you get the methodology up front, but then the entire second half of that book is Okay, here's a typical sales process, right? Prospecting, outreach, networking, meeting, next step, next step, follow-up, all of those things. And so we put the methodology into each one of those with examples of how to do that. So I think the thing that the biggest part that was missing for me and that I see consistently and what this is what we train on is the how in between. So for example, I'll give you a live example for people. If you followed up with a client or potential client and you've had great meetings, let's say for the last 3 to 6 months, they're like, yes, we want to move forward. We're going to do that in March. Get the contract over to us. Fabulous. Then all of a sudden now we're pushing the end of month today. So then we get contacted by our boss, right? Well, in the pipeline that says this is closing, is it still closing? And you're like, well, I haven't gotten the contract back yet. This is just classic, right? And so then you move it to your, in your CRM to April, and then you're going to come back and get questioned of why that's not closing in March. And then they say, so follow up with the client and find out where it's at. Well, thank you for that guidance. I mean, do you not think that that's, that's an awareness of what I know I need to do, but I have followed up now. Like 3 to 4 times. So here's where we get stuck. We don't know what to say. That's where we come in. That's the communication piece that is missing in sales training. How do you not say, hey, just following up again. How's the contract looking? How do you actually make it impactful, intentional to where they will respond? In real time for you. That's what's missing. So those are those things that we come in and do. And I will say the best of teams, the best of managers, the best of companies, all can be great leaders and all can be great in coaching in some aspects. However, this is very specific and, and it's, you have too much going on to dive into how do you even begin to do this with teams. And so this is where we kind of really elevate that. For them is to teach people how to do that.

And this is all a perfect segue because I was going to ask you to talk about the BRUH method and how you came up with that framework and what it all entails.

Yeah, so there's 4 different elements of communicating. So we have a communication wheel of thinking, listening, speaking, and nonverbal. When we think of meetings, let's think of in general, we're, we're going to go have a meeting with a prospect or a client. We have an agenda And we know our talk track and that's what we think about. So we're missing, we are missing 3 elements of communication there. The other fabulous one that I think we recognize a lot because it's buzzy in business right now is how to listen well. I'll tell you, in, in seas of teams where there's hundreds of people in the room, I will always ask who here thinks they listen well. It's always a show of hands of over about 60%. And I will push back on that and say you do not. Listening is a very hard skill, and if you are not highly present, you don't listen well. Most of the time we're asking questions to answer them, not to hear them. Also, the only test that we really have on if we do listen well is if the other person feels heard. So we have to ask, we have to start asking. How they feel about that. Yeah. Get more reaction from them instead of just moving on once they say something. It's a learned practice, lifelong skill. So you put that into the non-awareness of nonverbal communication, and then we're all moving fast these days. So the thinking element is more of that prep time of what are you preparing and how are you doing it different to be impactful? Uh, we don't think about that enough. We're running from meeting to meeting. You're like, oh, I got my 3 talking points, I'm good. So all of those things come into play, and of course they're kicking around in real time all over the place, all 4 of them. So we took that model and put that into the BRU Methodology to separate it, to really start thinking about how are we doing these pieces to raise you in your confidence, the confidence of the room to interact with you. So the BRU method is broken down to be the momentum. So we are going to drive that momentum forward. What does that mean? So if I'm prepping for a meeting, I have my agenda, I have my talk track. Now what I wanna do is prepare everything around it, which means I'm gonna check in with myself to make sure that my nonverbal is on point and that my meeting starts before the meeting. So if I get outta my car, It starts then within my awareness, within my presence, within where I'm at. So that means I'm not on my phone. Uh, that's completely away. So there's those things that I'm now preparing. I'm also preparing things like how to stay curious. That helps you listen more. So I have a thing, I still do it today where I, I put stay curious at the top of my note, my notes, every single meeting I have, stay curious. And we talk about this a lot in real time. And I just had someone that, that we have on our team that we're coaching message me and say, hey, they, when they get a little anxious, they start talking really, really fast. He's like, so instead of stay curious, I've been putting slow down at the top of my page. He's like, and it's helped so much. So this is what's brilliant about this, is that you make it your— these aren't these sales tactics from 1990 that are, that are these big You know, really kind of things that don't work in real time. They're great in theory. These are things that you make your own. So we want to level that up. That's be the momentum, right? It could be things like if you're sending a calendar invite, how can you do that to be memorable and impactful? I had one client a couple years ago say, I'm going to send the menu to where we're going to lunch. And I just put in there, hey, I'm eyeing this, looking forward to meeting with you next week. And the person walked in that day and said, I have been so looking forward to this lunch. I have been eyeing the menu as well. And I think this is what I'm having. That has elevated you. We all, all, all talk about how do I be a differential in the sea of same? That's it. It's not your product. It's your service. It's you. You are the difference and how you communicate is the difference. I don't know about you, but I've never in my life had a prospect walk into lunch and say, I have I've so been looking forward to you pitching me over lunch today. So I was like, kudos to you, kudos to you, right? So finding the momentum in that. And then the R is raise confidence. So we're gonna raise confidence for the entire room. We're also gonna raise your own confidence. That's the nonverbal that comes in. So now that we've done the thinking with the being the momentum, we're gonna talk about the nonverbal, how that's present, how that impacts. And then the E is engage. So, all right, now we're in it. How do we engage differently? If you've asked the same questions on the last 3 meetings the exact same way, it's time to reframe those questions, right? There are certain words that impact and sell. There are certain words that lower your credibility. Do you have those? Watching those. So really being mindful of how we're engaging, but also still continuing to build that momentum through obviously the raising confidence throughout as well. And then the W comes all around with what about the crap? Really? What about when things go wrong? What about when somebody hijacks your meeting? What about when your slides don't work? What about when your camera won't turn on? It's all the stuff that happens in real time. Cause I don't know about you, but I have never had a meeting go 100% smooth. There's always something because there's a human element involved. And so really preparing the first 3 are going to set you up for success no matter what comes into play. On the what-if, the unknowns that we cannot know and we figure out in real time, all those other 3 things are going to set you up for that. Nice. Yeah.

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Yeah, that's—

it's—

you're adding a lot of fun into the process as well. Because of these different elements. So, and I, I've never heard a sales process like this. So obviously you have really hit something that a lot of us need. How many of us have been on those sales calls where people, you know, do a, a cool reach out or some kind of reach out in email or LinkedIn or wherever, and then you get on the phone and they're just sell, sell, sell. There's nothing else personalized about it. And then obviously You know, that's for small businesses like myself, but then going into larger companies and thinking about the in-person selling, you're just adding like something that would make me think to be excited about being a salesperson, right? Bringing some of that joy back into the process.

Yeah. If you can stay curious, one of the biggest shifts there is thinking around not what do I sell, but how can I stay curious about learning about this other person today to see if there's a fit. I just was listening to something before we jumped on around disassociating from outcome. It's one of the hardest things to do. If you can do it in sales, you will be so successful. And one of the things that you need to remember is that your goal is the outcome. The goal that you put yourself, the financial goal, we all have a financial goal. If you work for a company, they have a financial goal for you. Right? That's out there. That's out there Q1. What is the goal for either the quarter, the month, the year, whatever? That's the outcome. So now what we need to focus on is the habit in between, the habit that gets you there. So if we can disassociate from outcome or goal and really focus on the pattern and the habits to get there, then you're gonna be successful no matter what. It's when we focus continually on, I get, you know, I have a call with somebody and all I'm focused on is getting the contract in. You're pushing to goal. Gotta wait, go way back to, I just want to see if we're aligned. 50% of your clients are not a good fit. Half, half of your clients are not a good fit. That doesn't mean forever. That means right now. So offboard them as fast as you can so that you can give space to those that are. We tend to get on that hamster wheel because we're pushing to goal instead of being present. So shifting it that way also, to your point, gets you excited to even talk to somebody. So it's not this mundane, oh my gosh, I have to talk to them about this pitch that I don't, you know, it's a, it's heavy. Sales can be very heavy feeling. So it brings a little bit of that joy back into how do I, how do I just learn about what's happening in this person's world and their business? Then maybe I can support them and that would be awesome. Let's see how that goes. Yeah.

Yeah. Much better perspective framing. One of the other things that you really focus on is women in leadership. Making sure women feel credible, visible in their credibility, that they feel supported. So can you talk a little bit about that?

Yeah, so the word leadership and leader, I will say anyone, anyone can be a leader. It's not your title. So any female can be a leader, any male can be a leader. We've seen the best of the best leaders in our own lives that don't quote unquote have titles. It's It's the barista that knows us by name, right? And, and really kind of is the outlier for us and always has a smile on their face, asks us how our dogs are doing, whatever that is. That's a leader, right? Because they're being present, they're taking action into moving confidence for you to engage and be confident in talking to them. That's a leader. So, so many people get that kind of, we can have titles all day long, but I, I know everyone out there is listening to this. Has known somebody with a title that's not a leader. So, uh, take that to heart and be a leader. I don't need a title. So for women, a lot of that is the confidence value that comes with that, and that there's a lot that goes into that, right? There's a lot of nuances within a corporate space, different interactions from, from team members, all of those things. So, and it's all different for every single person. So that makes it complicated, obviously. However, we can do stuff for ourselves as women to really rise that. And a big part of that is our nonverbal first, because it actually physically gives us confidence. If anybody's ever seen the one episode of Ted Lasso where she's standing in front of the mirror, she's got her hands on her hips and she's doing this little lady power pose, and then her child self comes out in the mirror and they're smiling at each other, that's literally what you need to do. There's lots of science that backs the psychology around you actually gaining confidence by just having high power pose, which is a good posture. So really tapping into your own body language and how that's working will help you tremendously start that confidence line. So when we're talking to women about this, we're always talking about centering with that first. How you are sitting, your posture is really important. Eye contact. If we do have some level of confidence that's lower, we tend to lessen our eye contact. So making sure that the eye contact is visible in there and then showing your hands. I know that that's one that may sound odd, but our hands are trust factors. They build trust with people. So no matter what, no matter if you're trying to be, you know, more in a leadership role or just gaining confidence for a room, making sure that those are visible. So resting them on a table, if they're in your lap, pulling the chair back a little bit so they're seen. If you're at a networking event, don't have things like a phone in your hand. A drink is fine. Make sure that it's out though, not cross-body. Want to keep our posture up, right? That will help that. No pockets, things like that. Those are the 3. Those are your power skills for nonverbal. And then really from there, it's all the different nuances. We work a lot with women on how to speak up in a meeting. They have great ideas, then they say it after the meeting. And I will tell you, I used to be one of them. So when I go back to thinking about my career and my first beginnings as an outside rep, I would always go into those boardrooms with the sales team that I was on. And not say a thing. And my mindset was, I'm too green, I don't know enough. And I, by the way, I hear this daily from teams. I don't know enough. There's, there are very tenured people in this room, and then we're in sales, which means everybody likes to speak, so I don't need to add to that room, right? That was my mentality with that. And then for a while after the meetings, I would always then go back to my manager and say, hey, You know, I took some notes on this. I was thinking about this. I was going to give you feedback on this. And about the third time I did it, he was like, so here's the deal. Can't walk in here and— you have to engage in the meeting, start speaking up in the meeting. You have good ideas, start talking about them with the group. That allowed me to raise my confidence, having someone that supported me. That I knew would support me in that, that also was aware of my confidence level at the moment to be able to help rise me in that, is the world. So the other part of that is finding your people. Find your people. So when you're in those— and you have them, I guarantee you have them. They might not notice that you're working on this or want to work on this. Give them the opportunity to to support you in that. Let them know what's happening. Say, hey, I really want to work on engaging a little bit more in these meetings. I know this may sound kind of strange, but would love to know if you have any feedback for me, or when I do, if you can give me feedback on, on how it goes and what I could do better, right? You know, people are in your corner, which gives you the space to be able to be a little bit more confident. So find those people. I guarantee you have them, lean into them, because then you'll be more confident to say, okay, if this goes wrong, they're going to come in and say, eh, well, maybe, well, have we thought about it this way? And they're going to help and support and support you in that journey. So give yourself some grace. Nobody does anything alone. So find your people, start with your confidence of your nonverbal, and then really take those accomplishments to heart. So even if you walk into a boardroom tomorrow, or a meeting tomorrow and you are working on your posture and your eye contact. Come out of that meeting, you didn't say a thing, but then you go back and you're like, I worked on my posture and my eye contact and I felt better about it. I want you to celebrate that. I want you to celebrate that, whatever that means to you. For me, it's always coffee. So I will go get a coffee at any point in time if I do something amazing. So you have done something amazing. Go celebrate that and then go do it again. That's, it's practice. Confidence doesn't happen overnight. No one is born with it. It is a practice. Practice to learn behavior.

Yeah, 100%. And if you, I, I love that you said find your people because if you don't have people around your everyday life, then it's, chances are you're a phone call away, you're an introduction away from finding those people. Cuz that's happened to me recently. I realized most of my family, not actually none of my family and most, none of my close friends are entrepreneurs. So I found a couple of people through different introductions or somebody was on my podcast and then another person was introduced to me by one of my students that changed the way I looked at myself and my brand after learning from them and going, wow, they're where they're at and this is how they got there and they see this in me. And I need to see this in myself. And it came to like pricing for products and things like that, you know, and not— yeah, appreciating our own value in the world.

Yes, yes, yeah. It is so hard to do that, especially going back to the beginning of this conversation. We are in the mundane a lot in our lives. Everyone has so many things going on, whether that's, you know, family, kiddos, animals, travel, house, it's everything that we all have. And so it's really easy to get away from having a specific or planned support system. If we think early on in our life, those were kind of built in by having school, and then it's built in, especially, you know, in the workplace a little bit too. Now everyone, a lot of people are working from home so that, that can separate that very easily. And then if you're an entrepreneur, then, you know, game on for being isolated. So, so it's super easy to do that. I remember when I first started, I was so embedded into the corporate lifestyle that I felt like I wasn't ever doing enough if I wasn't doing some sort of work from 8 to 5. I was at home, right? So it was like, oh my gosh. So if I took a minute and like threw a load in the laundry. I felt like I was less than focused on work enough because I wasn't putting in the time. It took a long time to figure out that I actually could get more done from 8 to 1 and then be totally done with my day than I ever did in corporate. So it's that shift that takes a long time. And if you don't have those people to say, oh yeah, I went through that too. And who cares if you got it done? It's great. Go spend the afternoon doing what you want or clean the house or whatever that is. And then to your point of value with, with pricing that comes in, that took me a long time as well too. And really starting to think around the value of service and not time is really an important shift. And then the more that you surround yourself with people who think like that, the easier it is. To move and just say, this is it, this is, this is the pricing, you know. So I think to your point, it just, it does, you have to find those people. I was talking to a nonprofit the other day who's doing fabulous work for young, young people going into the workplace. And they have this, they have a community where it's a specific community that's very safe where they can come in and say, I'm really struggling. With how to represent myself at work. I'm really struggling with how to get a job. I'm so, you know, it's all these things. And here's the success story that I just had, right? But they actually get together and meet and do certain things to level that up. And I looked at him and I was like, do you have this for 40+ people? I want to be in a group like that. Like, how do, you know, middle-aged people find the right group? So it's a pattern in, in our lives that we have to keep kind of bubbling up and, and really put the effort in to find that. Yeah.

Amazing. Okay. We are going to link your LinkedIn profile, Sales and Presence website, which is such a beautiful name, and your book Connect to Close, which I believe is available on Amazon and other retailers.

It is. Yes.

Fantastic. Love it. Amy, do you have a favorite quote, mantra, verse, poem, family motto, words that continue to inspire you to bring the light that you're bringing to this conversation into everything you do?

I love that. I don't have like a favorite quote. There's a few there. Dale Carnegie has, to be interested, be interesting, which I love. Amy Purdy, who is a— she's a success story in her own right. You can look her up, P-E-R-D-Y. She had mentioned something that I use a lot of, how do you want people to think and feel from and have their experience from your presence, which I think is really beautiful. But my word always, I have it tattooed actually on me, is the word inspire. So if I were to say one thing, it would just be that word has— I actually have it up here too. I don't know if you can see it behind me, but that word has really meant a lot to me in my life of like, how do I show up to inspire others? I'm constantly inspired by these phenomenal people doing phenomenal things in the world. And so if I can light one person up, that's amazing. Yeah.

Great word. Great word. Great quotes. Thank you so much for being on the show. Thank you to everybody who's watched this episode or listened to it on your favorite platform. Leave us a rating review. Tell us what you like. Those 5 stars and those reviews make a big difference in our discoverability. And I'll be back again with another amazing guest to share their story their journey and some tips and tricks to make your life better every day. Thanks for listening or watching to this episode of Your Brand Amplified. Don't forget to leave us a rating or review on your favorite podcast listening platform. And if you want to learn more, check us out at yourbrandamplified.com.

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