Meditation & Prayers for Peace, & Developing Emotional Resilience

Hello, and a warm, warm welcome to our live event today with myself, Ashok Gupta. I'm the founder and CEO of the Gupta Program. And I really want to thank you for being here with us today on this very important event where we'll be talking about how we can develop emotional resilience in the face of world events that we're seeing unfolding on our TV screens right now. And also later in the session, we'll be offering our thoughts and prayers and love to those who are caught up in conflicts around the world, especially Israel and Gaza. So I want to thank you for joining us and give you a bit of background as to why we are putting this event together. Now, I know that many of you are coming from different backgrounds. Some of you may have friends and family that are caught up in the Middle east right now. Others may just be finding this situation very difficult. And essentially this event has been put on because we've received so many emails at the clinic. People with chronic conditions, with anxiety that we treat, who have said that they're finding the current situation really, really challenging. And some of people have emailed saying that they've not been able to sleep. Others have said that their anxiety has been skyrocketing. Others have said that they really lack that feeling of safety, which is has made their brain retraining a lot harder, or just in general, life has become more challenging. And I really want to address this today. So in the first half of today's sessions, we'll be looking at how the underlying psychology of why we react in this way to world events, what's going on within our physiology, within our brains, and what we can do about that. And then in the latter half of today's session, we will then go through our prayers and meditation for those innocent civilians caught up in the conflict. And as many of you know, within the Gupta program, we have free daily healing sessions on the app. And it's open to anyone. It's free. Essentially, you download the app, search Gupta Program, the App Store or Play Store, and we have daily sessions Monday to Friday at 10am Eastern, and that's 3pm UK, 4pm Europe, where we have some breathing, some meditation, and it's in a group. We have hundreds of people joining us each day. So if that's something you could benefit from, please do download the app or tell friends and family about this, especially with the current situation, that daily healing, that daily relaxation is incredibly important. And before we go into today's session, let's just take a moment to breathe and center ourselves, because I know many of you once again are finding the current situ situation very challenging. You may be experiencing stress, anxiety and all those types of symptoms. And therefore, let's just take a moment to breathe and center. So let's close our eyes and let's take a slow, deep breath in from the stomach. And let's breathe out slowly through the nose. Once again, a deep breath in from the stomach. And breathing out slowly through the nose. And keeping our eyes closed, we can center ourselves by grounding ourselves within our bodies, by really connecting to our feet on the floor. Right now, just feeling grounded with our feet on the floor. And feeling that connection to mother Earth. Breathing slowly and deeply from the stomach with that sense of grounding, Just loosening consciously your shoulders, loosening your arms and just coming back into your body, Falling deep into your body, Connecting to the earth. Let's take another slow, deep breath in. And breathe out through the nose slowly with a gentle smile on our face. And now let's take in another energizing breath in. And breathing out slowly through the nose is coming back into your body, back into the room. Another energizing breath in. And breathing out. And when you're ready, when you feel comfortable, you can just gently open your eyes. Okay, welcome back, everybody. So the first part of today, we're going to address our own emotional regulation and why that's important and how we can accomplish that given what's unfolding. And I know that we have many of our retrainers and friends who are tuning in directly from Israel and from Gaza. And I hope, especially for you, that this is comforting in some way, and in some way you can benefit from this, despite what's going on around you. Now, let's start off with the brain. Our brain is wired for protection and survival. That is his priority. It's not directly wired for a feeling of safety. And as we know, in the modern era, we're finding that levels of anxiety and depression are skyrocketing around the world as a result of many different factors. And therefore, first, I want to validate what you're going through, that the emotions that you are experiencing, whether it be sadness, grief, fear, anger, in a lot of cases, all of these emotions are perfectly normal and understandable when we are seeing what's unfolding on our TV screens. And there's nothing wrong with emotions. See, emotions indicate to us something that we want to change in our environment, or something that is either external that we can change, or it reflects something internal within ourselves that we can transform in some way. That might be a belief System, it might be an attachment that we have. And emotions indicate to us either something that's of real danger, something that we need to deal with, a fight or flight response, or if those emotions continue, it means there's something within ourselves that we can reflect on, observe, and let go. And so in normal cases, these emotions are quite valid. And okay. The issue is sometimes these emotions continue and they get out of balance with the actual threat that's present. So we all know about the fight or flight response. That is a physiological response that's designed for physical dangers. And yet in our modern era, we are bombarded with loads of negative images and messages which then trigger that physiological fight or flight response, the cortisol, the adrenaline, which then keeps our nervous system highly stimulated. And many people have written in, as we've said, saying they can't sleep, they're experiencing anxiety, they can't cope with the situation. And it always reminds me, actually, when I once went horse riding, and I was riding the horse and we were supposed to follow in a line, but my horse was very distractible, and he would go off and sniff some trees over here and go off in this direction and do something over here. And I had to keep pulling back the reins and allowing it to come back on the path that was set for us. Otherwise, the leader was saying, why is your horse going off in different directions? And in a similar way, our emotional mind is like the horse, and we are like the horse rider, the conscious mind or the intellect. And it is valid for the horse to go off in different directions. But if it starts doing it too much and getting caught up in different situations, it takes us off our path. And therefore, sometimes in these situations we have to observe what are the underlying beliefs which are making me dysregulated emotionally, making my nervous system be overstimulated. And let's come back to some evolutionary biology that really underpins this. I think our brains are designed to experience a level of empathy, and it's called an adaptive tribal state. So we all used to live in tribes. And so for 99.9% of our history of human history, our civilization lived in small tribes. And in those tribes, it was important that we felt empathy for those around us. And during that history, we would only hear about bad things, so called bad things that would happen within our tribe. And we would feel empathy for those people that were going through that suffering so that we could support them, and that enabled tribes to succeed, to flourish. So we may think of the selfish gene and how each of us are supposed to be selfish. But actually that contradicts a lot of history now learning, which is that we lived in tribes and we were cooperative and we supported each other. And empathy is an adaptive strategy to support that. But remember that that empathy was based upon the news that we would receive about around the hundred people around us in our tribe, let's say. But now that same brain that has evolved over millions of years is now exposed to the nightly news, to all the bad things that are happening around the world. And what is the news? The news is essentially, let's take all the bad stuff, let's feed it to you in 20 minutes with emotionally stirring videos. And this creates something called a maladaptive empath strategy, which essentially means that that empathy, which is very normal and helps us survive, is now maladapted to our modern world. We are now receiving all the negative news from the world. And that part of us that is empathic now gets overstimulated more than it's designed to. And then what happens is this causes the cortisol, the adrenaline, which then creates the draining of our energy. Because the number one thing that drains us of energy is worry, anxiety, fear, depressive states. So it drains us energy and it reduces our resilience to what is happening around us. And people who naturally would describe them as themselves, as highly sensitive people, HSPs or empaths, they are particularly affected by this maladaptive empath strategy. And therefore they will feel that they could become easily triggered by these types of events. Especially if we have perhaps religious connections to the Middle east, or we have family and friends who are there, or indeed we may experience a lack of security in our own living experience. And therefore it's recognizing that the news that we're watching is a vital part of this. And that's what's changed in the modern world. And therefore, when we resist what we're seeing and we see so much of it and we start doom scrolling watching the news, 24 hour rolling news, we probably addicted to it. This is not good for us at all. It's not designed for the way our brain has evolved. I mean, they've done studies where they found that just 14 minutes of watching news can actually increase our levels of anxiety, sadness and cortisol in the body. Just 14 minutes of watching the news can do that. So I hope that that helps us, as a starting point, clarify why we are having this overstimulation is this maladaptive empath strategy. And it doesn't help, because what help can we be to those who are suffering when our own nervous system is dysregulated and it creates that feeling of lack of safety for those around us and also for ourselves. How do we expect peace on earth if we don't have peace in our own minds? And therefore, this process of creating resilience within ourselves in the face of calamities is incredibly important. Let's take the example of a teacup and a teapot. We're all seeing what's happening on our TV screens and we may feel helpless. We may feel, I want to do something, I want to support those in suffering. So imagine their lives are like a teacup and we are the teapot. And the teapot is always filled with tea first. Yeah, I'm English, so this is obviously an energy that, that works for me. And so we want to be the teapot that is able to pour and support others around us. But if we ourselves are being drained of energy in these situations, we become empty, we become drained. We're not able to be there for others and therefore it doesn't help anyone. We become what we call a disempowered empath. And during the course of today's talk, I want to take us from being a disempowered empath to an empowered empath that can really be resilient in the face of what's unfolding and then be there for friends and family and people around us. But the starting point is that self care. And so what causes this maladaptive empath strategy? What makes us suddenly feel so much empathy for what people are going through that we ourselves become highly affected and traumatized by these experiences? Well, there are three main belief systems that I notice in a lot of clients. And one of them is this idea that worrying is caring. We may watch the news, watch the suffering, see what people are going through, and feel that our worrying, our care, and watching that 24 hour news is somehow meaning that we are showing our support in some way, we're honoring them. And sometimes we may feel guilt for not caring enough for others suffering. But the issue here is that nobody benefits from that. And that's a belief system that we have. And therefore, I want you to consider the possibility that worrying isn't caring actually and won't help. And what's more of a priority? All love starts with self love. That self love and self care is a starting point to being an empowered empath and being there for others around us in whatever capacity. And when we make that shift, when we recognize, oh yes, I am watching the 24 hour news because At a deep subconscious level, I believe that that's supporting and caring for those around me and those in Gaza and Israel. Whereas actually I wonder if we can challenge that particular belief. And one way that we can do that is let's just take a moment now to embody a new belief that we choose in that particular arena. So rather than worrying is caring. And I need to watch all of this to show that I care. How can we actually pull into our own self care? So let's just take a moment to close our eyes. Let's take a slow deep breath in from the stomach and breathe out. And let's with our eyes closed, despite what is happening in the Middle east, can we give ourselves permission to prioritize our own self care that I matter, I'm also a human being on this planet and that it's okay for me to prioritize my own health in this situation so I can fill my teapot, Take a moment to sink into that new belief system of prioritizing self care. And let's take a slow deep breath in. And let go. Another deep breath to embody self care. And breathing out slowly through the nose, relaxing the system. And when we're ready, we can open our eyes. Good. So it's that giving ourselves permission in these scenarios to prioritize our self love, our self care, filling our teapot and then we can see how we can support others. Perhaps that's donating your time. There may be donations of money you choose to give. It might be just supporting loved ones around you and that's your contribution. Or indeed your contribution may just be in that self regulation of your own nervous system and just sending positive love and vibrations to those in suffering. Whatever you choose is right for you. And on a practical level to overcome this unconscious belief that worrying is caring, something that I advise all of us to do if we are finding ourselves overstimulated and dysregulated is is to stop watching the news. And I know that's hard, but we can keep ourselves abreast of a situation by simply reading what is going on, which is less emotionally stimulating for our nervous system. And we can stop that doom scrolling, just keep ourselves abreast of the situation and send our positive vibrations. That's if you're feeling dysregulated by the situation. Because often the more we consume of this media, this 24 hour news, it can in fact trigger some of our own survival strategies and lack of safety. If we've experienced perhaps past mild to moderate trauma or violence or authority figures it can trigger some of our own lack of safety and therefore reducing our exposure to the news is incredibly important. Okay, now a second belief system that can over trigger our nervous system and make us dysregulated. And as you know, we treat a lot of people with chronic fatigue syndrome, long Covid, fibromyalgia, mold illness, and those types of conditions. And many people have become a little dysregulated and finding it harder to do the brain retraining. So a second belief system that we can challenge is when we are given these emotions like anxiety and fear and anger. We're given these emotions because at some level our amygdalas, which are an emotional centers, they want us to control or influence this situation and change something. And yet in the face of these situations, apart from the few things we might be able to do of contributing money or our time or supporting in some way or sending positive vibrations, there's not a lot that we can do. We don't have control or influence over this. Even world leaders and politicians have little influence over this. And therefore it's letting go of that belief that I can somehow influence or control this because that creates a sick feeling within us that I can't do anything. I feel helpless in the face of this, which also drains our resilience. Instead, it's letting go of that control. And something that some of you may find controversial is this idea of the grief cycle that many of us are experiencing grief right now. And let me just share a slide actually around the grief cycle that some of you may find useful. So in the grief cycle, the grief cycle is something that occurs within us when we experience loss. Some of that loss is the loss of normal functioning of the world. And we can be in shock and denial, like on the left hand side. When these things occur, we can experience anger at the authorities and how could they allow these things to happen? And this can also contribute to those depressive feelings. And that's a lot of what people are experiencing right now with the outbreak of what's going on in the Middle east and ultimately the. And we may not be ready for it right now, but ultimately the journey of the grief cycle is coming to a place of acceptance. You might say, Ashok, how can we accept what's going on? This is unfortunately the restriction of words that we have in the English language. Acceptance doesn't mean we accept it, but we accept the situation within. So we're not saying it's okay, we're saying I'm okay, that I accept the present moment and what is Unfolding, it doesn't mean we accept the situation in the sense of saying it's okay. And that is a journey that we go along. And that acceptance is important because it moves us from this idea that we can control or influence the situation to a sense of, I accept the present moment. And that allows us to become more regulated in our nervous systems. And on that point, we can therefore help ourselves by regularly meditating and breathing. And I hope you will join us for the Daily Gupta size on the Gupta program app, the free sessions where we have one of our beautiful coaches leading us through the breathing, the meditation, the healing. And it's such a lovely experience and people have had breakthrough experiences through attending that each day. So I hope you can join us for that to help you regulate your nervous system. And finally, before we go through our meditation today and sending our positive vibrations, a third fear I want us to be aware of is the fear of the future, that when we experience these challenges, we can have something called a Darwinian contingency planning process. Essentially, it means that when we hear of bad news, we think this is a turning point and now things are going to be worse. And I know a lot of people feel like that where they think, oh, look at humankind, look at what we're doing. The world's a bad place. I don't want to raise a child in an environment like this. But once again, this is a cognitive bias. This because of the way we are flooded with news and media compared to even 20, 30 years ago. The advent of rolling news and rolling social media is giving this cognitive bias of feeding us with, with all this negative stuff and thinking that mankind has gone off track. It's terrible. And yet something that can help us reorientate from a more logical perspective is actually, if you look at most factors, the world is getting actually a better place. How can that be? Give an example. When you ask most people, are there more wars and conflicts on the planet? Are more people dying and injuring and getting injured from these situations? People would generally say yes. And yet the official statistics show that compared to all of human history since the Middle Ages, we now have a 20th of the deaths and injuries from war than we ever did in our history, certainly in the last 20 or 30 years. So actually, war deaths are a 20 for what they used to be. They're much lower. The world has become a lot more of a peaceful place than it ever has been. It's just that we are fed, obviously, the news of all the worst things happening. Life expectancy has gone up Democratic processes are there. Life expectancy has actually almost doubled this in the last hundred years. Healthcare, education has improved, poverty has decreased. So I'm not saying there aren't bad things going on or things that we need to improve as a human society. But once again, let's not allow that cognitive bias of what we're seeing on TV to define our perspectives on life. And the hope that we can give ourselves is humanity has been through this before, it will get through this, things will improve. As bad as it feels now, once again, we're all at different stages of that grief cycle. Some of us may not be able to feel that, but just embodying that in the meditation breathing that we do each day can really help us. So in summary, what I'd love us to do is to observe our minds and how it's reacting to the situation and at a practical level, minimize our exposure to video news and really challenge those beliefs that worrying is caring. And instead saying it's okay to give myself permission to self care in these situations and prioritize that and that I secondly, don't have control. So acceptance and surrender to what is so is the only way forward to fill my pot, to fill my teapot. And thirdly, that we as a civilization have been through so many challenges the whole of human history and we will get through this together so we can reflect on that very easily. Self care, acceptance and surrender. And together we'll get through this. And I hope that that's helped us just put these things in perspective and once again, side by side. Joining us for Daily Gupta sais on the Gupta program app. And in whatever way you want to support, whether it's through praying, donating, volunteering, that's also something that can give us a channel for that anxiety and the worry that we may experience. So thank you so much today for joining me and going through this process of really understanding at a deeper evolutionary biology level why we're experiencing this dysregulation, the underlying belief systems and what we can do about it. I hope that's been beneficial for you. And please do share this video with your friends and family, with other people who are going through these traumatic periods right now. And I hope this can bring some comfort to them and support them in their time of need. So now see, what's important is now we filled our cup, I filled our teapots. We can now be in a better state, a resilient state, to then offer our positive vibrations to those in the Middle East. So what we're going to do is we're going to end this particular video now and I'm going to start a new Facebook Live on the same page. So I'm going to end this stream. And what I'd like you to do in a couple of minutes time is to refresh the page that you're on, the Gupta Program Facebook page or the YouTube video, wherever you are joining us, refresh the page and you will see the new feed. And please join me giving our prayers and meditation to those in Israel and Gaza. So thank you for watching and we'll see you next time on the Gupta Program app. Thank you.