My Employee Quit Mid-Meeting. Here’s the Next 10 Minutes (Real Footage)

Do you need to have clearing conversations?

I don't know, probably.

Cool.

I'm leaving though, actually.

Okay. Yes, that is exactly what it looks like, an employee quitting in the middle of my morning meeting. Now you're going to watch what I do over the next 10 minutes. So if you're a founder who's had a meeting go super sideways and then watched everything you decided after that quietly just not get done, And you also watched it turn into a draining gossip mill on top of that, then this one is for you because those are the real problems. It's not the blowup, it's what you do with the emotional collateral damage that happens and how you get people thinking clearly again in that room so you can still make good decisions that get followed up on. If you don't know who I am, my name is Luke Murray. I'm a former physician. I've been an entrepreneur for about 20 years. I've done over $100 million of revenue during that time. My current portfolio does about $3 million a year, and I make these videos because I would like to have ambition without the bullshit, and I'm guessing you would too. Now, 2 things before we jump into this live recorded video of my meeting. One is it's about 40 minutes into the meeting, and the woman who quit was 1 minute late, and we'd spent a big chunk of that meeting on what the expectation is when someone's late, just to use it as an example of how to apply that to that communication to other things. And at one point she said, hey, I kind of feel like I'm being called out here. And totally get that. My point wasn't to make her feel like shit. It was just to teach the team how to make clear agreements, which you'll actually see us do at the end of the video. I'll probably do a separate video on how I could have done that better, but I just wanted to be fair that this didn't come out of absolutely nowhere. Second, we're jumping in while I'm going around the room following up on a list of action items that's actually on the board behind me. And what I'm addressing at that point specifically is whether people had had clearing conversations, which is how we structure communication to operationalize one of our core values, which is speaking with candor. And so we're— I'm trying to do that with each person in the room. So that's the question that she's answering when I finally get to her. So let's get into the, to the meeting. Cool. So she might have needed to All right, so we're good. All right, cool. Fantastic. Leads not helping within a day. Cool. All right, thanks guys. What, what do we need to change now? Will you drop to our stage, please? Thank you. Hi. What do you think we need to do right now to— are people feeling strong emotions?

Yes.

Yeah, me too. Let's acknowledge those emotions. I know that we're gonna be late to things, so we're just gonna text Falmouth, who cares? It's a super— that was a Pretty triggering thing to happen. I'm sure she was probably very triggered as well. And—

She's been going through some stuff anyway.

Yeah.

It's not just— it's not just us and this. It's— she's got a lot of other shit going on too.

Yeah, I'm sure she does.

She just can't handle it right now.

Totally understood. Understood. Well, we want to honor that decision. I'm not going to chase her. I'm not going to— we're not mad at her. Or maybe we are, but we're allowed to be a whole bunch of things. Okay. What do you think we should do, Floyd? Why do you think I'm asking you specifically?

I guess because I came in late and don't know what's going on.

Nope. Nope. Super strong emotions I'm feeling right now. Is anyone else feeling super strong emotions? I feel super strong emotions. Why do you think I'm talking to you about what to do when you feel super strong emotions? Okay, I gotta stop and tell you this one because it's just— it's too good. So the guy with the hat around backwards, his name's Floyd, and the reason I'm asking Like, hey, what do we do when we get strong emotions? And it's because he gets nervous super easy. And a few months ago, I'd had him present something and he like couldn't think straight. And so I assumed it was because of the emotions he was feeling. So I asked what he was feeling like, what the energy wanted him to do. And he's like, I want to get out of here. Like, I'm so anxious. And so I said, okay, let's go. And so we left the actual meeting and like, I was like, all right, you want to run? Like, we ran down the street and he fell and he broke his elbow. Oh my gosh. And so anyway, all in the service of trying to move energy or process his emotions. Everyone in the room, because they're not freaking out, remembers that story and is— it's kind of like why we're smiling. I mean, they saw him in the, in the office with a sling on for a few weeks. So I'm asking him because that's what we're about ready to do right now, is move energy by moving our bodies. We're not going to like run outside. But emotions are just energy moving through our body, or at least trying to move through our body. And I'm just hoping that he remembers that. So, and he can't, ironically, because he's also freaking out right now. So let's keep going. I'm gonna let someone else guess why I'm asking Floyd what you do when you feel super strong emotions. Have you ever felt super strong emotions with me, Floyd?

Oh yeah.

What happened? What did I tell you to do?

Find out where they came from, I guess?

Sure. You guys can keep laughing on the inside. Everybody keep laughing.

What is it?

Cool. All right, go ahead, Jeremy. Go ahead, Jeremy.

Shaking them off?

Yeah. So get— everybody get up. I want everybody to get up. Okay? So what's happening inside me right now is like, Shit's like buzzing, like in my chest it's buzzing, down my arms it's buzzing. So I am going to go first for a second to try to like express this a little bit, and then you guys are going to go, and then we're going to like check our energy, and then we're going to do it again. Okay, so I'll go first, trying to breathe. Don't fall over. Oh gosh. Okay, hold on. Is it still there? I'm still kind of freaking out a little bit. That's way better. It's still there. All right, go ahead and join me, guys. Do your version of it. Ready, set, go. All right. Okay. Deep breath. Check it again. How are we doing? Has it moved at all? No. No? Okay. Yeah, you were the worst at all that, by the way, so I'm not surprised yours didn't go anywhere. All right, here we go. Let's go again. Deep breath. Make your body big. At least make your body big, okay? And then do whatever you need to do. Okay. Okay. Deep breath. Make your body big again. And out. Yeah, I know. You need to be careful, dude. All right. We've moved, we've moved some energy. It's certainly not gone. I still feel anxiety. I still feel probably some fear. I still feel some stuff down my arms, but it's just, it's moved a little bit. I'm glad we're not walking around completely emotionally constipated. Maybe a little bit, like we fully didn't get it all the way out. We've moved it a little bit. So Action items. What needs to change today to make all this stuff work? I need your help today. Yeah.

If

you can

help me out.

Oh yeah, so yeah, you've got a, you got a job now. Okay, cool.

Can I steal him?

Yeah, you can have him back. You can have him back. Uh-huh. All right, in terms of like action items around that, uh, I'm gonna let Nikki know that she quit, and Nikki's gonna process whatever she needs to process. What else are we gonna do eventually?

Do we have to connect with everybody? Hmm? Do we have to connect with everybody?

Go through the emotions?

Go through the emotions, yeah. Is that what you mean? The emotion thing?

Yeah, I mean also like with the whole team.

Yeah, I don't— yeah, what do you think is the right move? What do you guys want to do? This is like not a standard protocol thing, right? Like tell HR is like a thing and Nikki's gonna do her process. What do you guys think would be most in line with our values? You have to be honest about what happened. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

I think connecting with the team sooner rather than later.

Sure. Yeah. Sorry. Because what I'm listening for, what I'm listening for is—

A clear agreement?

Yeah. So when you have an idea, please express it in the form of a clear agreement.

Okay. So who? Jeremy or me?

Who? That's not a name.

Who? Jade or Jeremy.

Jade. Jade, good job.

Sends a message out to the team. Okay. The team specifically.

Yeah, the team. Is the team— does it— does not include— so that is the team is all peers?

Yes.

Okay, cool.

So the team might— by the end of day today.

Do you want to do it right now before you leave? To like not have it hanging in your head? Because what I expect to happen if we don't do it right now is that she's in pain. She's going to call people and all that stuff. And so like, and I don't— I want her to do whatever she needs to do to process the shit that's going on in her life. So do you think it would be helpful to send that text message before you leave?

Should I send it in our HBH chat?

No, you— I want to know what you think, leader. I don't want you to take a survey, and then you decide, and then everyone can give their feedback to your decision as the leader. Okay, so you said group chat before you leave saying— or yeah, what are you gonna say? Cool. Everybody cool with that message? Great. Cool.

Yeah. I think I will—

What else do you want to add to that message? Because people are like, what happened? I mean, it's like super juicy gossip when people quit. It's like the best gossipy gossip there is. So to get ahead of that, what would you like to address?

I guess that we are unsure why.

Yeah, not— yeah, sure. We

don't know why.

Not sure why. Okay, cool. That'd be great. What else? Anything else?

Um, if you have any questions, let me know.

Sounds good. Yeah, I'm okay with that. You guys okay with that? I would like for you to add, like, we'll do the emotions processing thing at some point. So that sounds like a— everybody good with that? Cool. All right, so Jade is gonna send a text to certain people that says exactly what we just said that it says before she leaves, and Luke is Is going to— I've already texted Nikki, but I will talk to Nikki by 9:30 today. By 9:30 today. I want you to tell me just with your face, your voice, that you got it done. And if you don't get it done, let me know. Like, tell me. Mm-hmm. I will close the loop on my end by telling you, hey, I've talked to Nikki. Which I'm definitely gonna forget. Remind me by 9:30 this morning— no, remind me by 10 AM this morning to tell Jade that I talked to Nikki about quitting. There we go, guys. We just did all that shit in action. I know this took for freaking ever, so hopefully it'll take less time next time, okay? Proud of you. Anybody else got anything else? I know you've been sitting here for freaking ever, so thank you. Really proud of everyone here. Great job. Hey, Luke. So there you go. Somebody walked out on us and I had like 10 minutes before we had to end the meeting. So starting with the point where I had 5 grown adults on their feet, like shaking their bodies out, like, I know that looks super weird, but this is why I'm not embarrassed about it. Watch me on the tape. I say it out loud, like my chest is buzzing, my arms are buzzing, and I'm the guy running the meeting. Like, I can't think. And I'm about to start assigning work to people, like, and I'm the boss. So imagine what everyone else in the room is feeling like. That's not a state in which a clear, rational decision is about to be made, and it's certainly not the place where those decisions are going to be remembered and acted upon with certainty and clarity and reliability. So as much as, as much as it does look weird and feel weird to do that, I'd rather just do it and accept the judgment of my team or you or even of myself. And then feel physically better and also get the benefits of making better decisions and minimizing the amount of gossipy sideways energy that happens. So in my opinion, dealing with, uh, that is better than dealing with the missed tasks and just managing the rumor mill. Um, I just rather would just feel weird for 30 seconds. And honestly, you don't get to skip the emotion anyway, even if you don't express it. It's in there messing stuff up whether you want it to or not, and we don't move it, it makes the decisions for you. Again, it could be like a shitty text message that you wouldn't send, or just a call you wouldn't make on a normal Tuesday, or again, more likely in this case, just a whole bunch of dropped balls because people are freaking out. And notice that I actually didn't fix it completely, and I say that on the tape, like the emotion's not gone, it just has moved and it has improved the clarity that I'm able to think. That's all I was going for, just so that we could be like— have a chance to do the next part. And this is the part I actually want you to steal. Watch what I did to Jade. She says the team should get a message, and that's not an agreement. That's like a decent idea. So I said, who? And she says like, oh, it's me or Jeremy. And I said, no, give me a name. And then it was like After who exactly? It's doing what exactly? By when exactly? What happens if you don't get it done by then? And how do you close the loop so that I know that it's done? Those 5 things. I make her say all 5 of them out loud, and then I do my own half in front of everybody. Like, I'm gonna talk to Nikki by 9:30 or 10, and I was definitely gonna forget, so I sent myself that reminder. I didn't trust myself in that room either, so I put my own failure into the agreement on purpose just to show what was going on. So if someone's ever said to you, communication is bad around here, it's almost never that people aren't saying stuff to each other, like talking. It's that nobody ever said who is going to do what by when and how the loop was going to close and what would happen if that didn't happen. And it could also be that when people are making these agreements, they're just in an emotional state when The stuff wasn't gonna get done anyway. So here's what I actually want to know. When you watched 5 grown adults standing in the room shaking their arms and, you know, moving energy, what did you feel? So if it was nothing, then why? And if it was something, I want to know that just as much. And what would you have done instead in the 10 minutes after somebody just walks out on the job? Let me know in the comments below. And as always, thanks for watching.