How to Become a More Positive Person
18 Nov 2020 · 15 min
Brendon TEST Burchard draws on 20 years studying behavior change to explain how mindset and perception shape motivation and emotional well-being. He covers strategies for improving focus and resilience, and discusses his coaching program and supplements.
Foreign hey, my friends, it's Brandon Burchard and welcome to a special episode of the Brendon Show. Hey, I'm Brendon Burchard and I'm honored to be your high performance coach today. With this episode, I've spent the last 20 years studying human behavior change and writing, coaching and training literally at the top levels on the topics of motivation, focus, productivity, confidence and more. My goal, inspired by my own personal journey, is to help you and my audience live love and matter, which means to feel more vibrant, more connected and and more fulfilled in every area of your life. That's what we're doing today. If you like today's episode, grab a screenshot and share it on Instagram. Just tag me Enonbruchard so I can see you and give you a shout out or a hello. And if you want to go to another level of personal development in your life this month, be sure to join me live every month in my coaching program. Just visit HPXCoaching to get signed up. I teach a brand new personal development session every single month. Meaning it's like a personal development seminar for you. Live every single month on the first of the month and then after I teach that for about 75 minutes, then we do live breakouts where you get to meet new people, network with people, set your monthly goals and establish real accountability for your growth. Listen, you know that expert guidance and real consistency and an inspiring community is critical to your growth. So join me this month on the 1st. Just go to hpxcoaching.com that's hpxcoaching.com it's time to level up, my friend. It's time to take your year back. It's time to find that focus and that confidence and that vibrancy and that vibe.
Again.
Go to hpxcoaching.com and and let me be your coach into fuller levels of high performance in every area of your life. Now, without further ado, let's jump in to today's episode.
Now I want to share with you what I call the ladder of perception. It's just a way of understanding how your mind works. So often we go through the day, something happens and turns us into a bad mood. And for the rest of the day we were kind of wrecked and ruined and upset and frustrated. And it's not until we go home, have five glasses of wine that we finally chill out. Right? So what can you do in the middle of the day to get yourself back? It's just helping you understand, well, how do your thoughts work how is it you're getting into these times in your life where you're just emotionally so upset or so frustrated or you feel like you're just not in control? And how can we use that same reasoning to figure out how can you shape a more positive mindset? Because we all want to feel better, right? We want to have more positive thoughts, and it's just hard when the day is crazy. We all want to have a lot more buoyancy and vibrancy and pop to our life, but it's hard when we keep taking in so much information that's not always positive, right? So this is going to be a way to explain how to get you in a better mindset. And it all begins with this first part. The first thing that happens to shape your way you think is you get some information, right? Super basic, I know, but hold with me for a second. Sometimes we don't realize how much information is coming in that is turning us into a negative person. And sometimes information happens and we grab hold of it and make it more than it is. I mean, has anyone said to you in the last couple months, hey, it's not a big deal, calm down. If they had, it's because there's this information coming in and you're grabbing it in a specific way that's turning your mind towards negativity. I know this sounds very, very basic, but I promise you, we have to start with what's coming in, right? It's just that old saying, garbage in, garbage out. So what I tell people, if you want to have a healthy mind, first and foremost, pay attention to the information that is coming in. What are you consuming? What are you looking at? What are you watching? What are you reading? Who are the people who are around you? All of that is shaping your mind, which I know you already know. Here's the question. When's the last time you did sort of an assessment or an analysis of the people and the information coming in? Like what blogs are you reading a lot? What do most of your emails seem to say? Who are the people who are around you? What's the emotion and the energy and the information they're giving you? I know this sounds really crazy, but I am so, so controlling of that in my life.
I don't have a lot of negative.
People who are always giving me negative information. I don't consume very much media at all. I don't watch horror films or. Or I don't consume a lot of information that just tends towards the negative at all. Not because I'm Pollyanna because I understand how it's going to affect me long term. So pay attention to the information you have coming in second as the ladder goes up. Well, we get the information and then we interpret it one way or another. This is where obviously we know we see something, some information comes in, we interpret it as bad or good, positive, negative, something I need to interact with and react to or not. The challenge is most people take little pieces of information and they blow it up and they interpret it to mean something very personal and very negative. If you're in a place where you feel like you have a lot of arguments and fights, it's rarely about what's coming in because we all deal with negative information or bad things or the day gets interrupted. It's how do you interpret it?
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Then as we move up we move to identity, right? This is. What did I see? What does it mean? Positive or negative? Then it says, what does this mean about me, specifically? Right? And this is where people take things very, very, very personal. You know, someone comes in to work and says, well, I have some bad news. We're gonna have to let some people go today. And then they interpret it, oh, my God, this company's gonna fail. Oh, my gosh, I'm gonna have to quit. Oh, my gosh, I might get fired. Oh, my gosh, what's gonna happen in the future? And then identity. Here it is again. I failed again. Here it is again. I never seemed to get good things from me. Here it is again. I just don't seem like I'm deserving of anything. And people take things at a personal level into their identity over a period of time. Now you can see how this ladder is building because negative information can come in. You interpret it negatively, and then you take it personally negatively. And this is what happens to people.
They don't realize.
Little simple things. Little simple things. Someone cuts you off in traffic. How do you interpret that? See, when someone cuts me off in traffic, I go, oh, well, they didn't see me. Or, oh, they were trying to get ahead of you. Other people, you know what they do? They're like that son of a.
They get completely angry.
They completely freak out. They say, all drivers are horrible. I hate this commute. This sucks. And then they say to themselves that I did take it so personally. They say, you know what? I'm going to get back at this person. I'm not going to be wronged. I'm not going to be disrespected. So they speed in front of them and cut them off because they took someone passing in front of them to be what? Disrespect to who they are? Because they're a person who always feels disrespected. If you always feel disrespected, what are your thoughts going to be like? So you see how all this is starting to build to how you feel, and then it shapes what you intend in the world. What are you going to do? Right? Your mind is all focused towards this one simple set of questions. It's what does all this information mean? How do I need to interpret it? Pay attention to it? Not pay attention to it. Important, not important. Good, bad. Then we take it to us. What does this mean to me personally? What does this say about me as a human? What am I dealing with here? And then it ultimately shapes our intention. What do I want in this world. So the next time you find yourself in emotional craziness or. Or you feel really upset, or you're saying, I don't know why I'm thinking this way, you can step it back. What did I hear? How did I interpret that? What did it mean to me? What do I intend to do? Because all of that led to what you ultimately do, the initiative that you take in the world, what you're actually going to be doing. So here's the payoff. When you're doing things that you are not proud of, when you are doing things that you think like, I don't understand why I'm not taking more action. I don't understand why I keep beating myself up. I don't understand why I keep getting in fights with the people that I love. I don't understand why I can't stay more persistent towards my goals. If that ever happens, just take a pause and go, you know what? I need to think about what is happening here. Because it's the way that you're perceiving the world that is controlling how much you progress in the world, right? And a lot of people, when they're having negative behavior, they just think it's happening to them. And I say, oh, let's just step it back, okay? You. You were mean to your husband. Okay? You found that you were really short with them. Where did that come from? And then we can just step back. How are you feeling about yourself in that circumstance or that situation that led this this way? What happened? What did your husband do? What did he not do? And how did you interpret it? And ultimately, what did you see or not see and experience? I know it sounds so basic, but try it. If you can work this through on a couple different examples from your recent past. Just think about those times when you really struggled or you didn't feel good. Go through this, write it down, journal it, and you'll start to feel a lot more understanding about who you are and how your mind works.
All right? Hey, my friend. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. If you're ready to go to another level, don't Forget, go to hpxco coaching.com Let me be your coach. Let me spend the first of each month with you, giving you a personal development seminar. Let me help you get unstuck, break through your emotional blocks, find your real.
Clarity, your real passion, your real purpose.
And implement the habits that you know you need to implement. Change your life by getting a coach, getting some expert guidance. Listen, you got as far as you could get you're here. You've achieved so much in your life. You. But to go to another level requires another level of mindset, another level of discipline, another level of direction and community and consistency. And that is what my coaching program is all about. So go to hpxcoaching.com and listen, if you're ready to go to a whole other level, I'm hiring. Please go to brendon.com hiring for our open roles. I got a big secret project that we are rolling out and you'll only find information that@Brendan.com hiring we've got, I don't know, 10 or 12 open positions there. If you ever wanted to work with me, if you wanted me to be your leader, you wanted me to literally employ you and help you grow in your career and do what we do, serving this mission of helping people around the world achieve their dreams faster, helping them improve their lives. We live every day as a team to do that. And we are currently hiring. We're building out a new product and we need some people to help us do that. Brendon.com hiring if you don't know how to spell my name, don't even think about it. We're looking for people who are pros. If you're interested in internship with me, don't go there. We're not hiring interns. If you're interested in starting your career with me, don't go there. We are an A team here. We've got people who are really experienced. So if you're new to personal development or you're new to marketing, you're probably not going to be the person we're looking for. We're looking for people with at least three years of professional experience in a lot of different roles because we take.
This role very seriously.
We get to change lives and millions of them every single day. That's the work. So we're looking for real pros, top of your game, ready to come on to an organization that reaches just as many people in the world as any other personal development influencer or trainer on the planet. And we'd be excited to have you join us in a big new initiative we're rolling out for the beginning of the year. I can't even tell you any more about that. Go to brendan.com hiring if you'd like to work with us. And if you just want to go to another level and have me as your coach, not your boss, go to hpxcoaching.com, so I can give you a brand new personal development session this month to help you set your goals, get on track, get unstuck, and achieve your ultimate difference. Go to hpxcoaching.com for that. Thanks again for listening to the Brendon show. You all mean so much to me. I have so much coming out in the next couple months for you here that's gonna be unique and special and I know you're gonna love it. So keep your head up. I know it's been a hard year. Please remember, as always, you are stronger than you think and the future holds good things for you.