How to Create Your Best Self From Scratch

Yes, Pursue those passions. Yes. Be awesome to people in your transitions. When you realize both are possible, then every day is a new day and opportunity to keep steering your ship in the right direction while still maintaining connection and meaning and fulfillment with others. Today's topic is on yolo. This very popular concept of you only live once, which I absolutely love and agree to. I've always believed that mortality motivation is one of the greatest lessons in all of personal growth. The truth that our life, while here on an earthly existence anyway, is finite, that each of us will only have so much time, and we should consider simple questions of, hey, in, you know, if three years from now I was not going to be here, what would I want to achieve or do or contribute or say, or connect with? Who would I want to love and open up to and forgive and have a conversation with? I think that those types of questions are important that we always contemplate towards the end of our lives. What questions would I even ask myself to see if I was happy with my life, which has been the primary teaching of my entire life? And if you ever saw anything on Facebook or on everything where it's, you know. Brendan Burchard, live, love, matter. It comes from my car accident that inspired me to realize that, hey, I'm going to pass away. And I learned from a car accident at the end of my life. My particular questions are, did I live? Did I love? And did I matter? And so I contemplate those questions each day. And so I think yolo is a good thing because it's this idea of like, hey, you know what? Let me remake the decisions in my life and really consider, is this the track I want to be on? Am I really living out my passions or expressing my creativity, my authenticity? Am I doing things that I'm interested in and that I feel like, contribute in a unique way that actually helps other people or fulfills my dreams? And these are all really important topics, right? But I do think there's a one caveat, because the idea of YOLO contemplating, you know, you only live once had a great philosophical underpinning for about a good, you know, 5,000 years. Okay. The new modern version of YOLO would be something I would warn everyone about, which is more of the Instagram yolo, which is the effort mentality, which is, you know what? Let me just blow up my life. Eff it. I'm just gonna, you know, no one else matters. I don't care what anyone else thinks. Screw them all. I'm just gonna throw away my life and my relationships. And my, you know, stuff, and I'm just gonna start anew, which is more of a modern version of a glamorized midlife crisis. And so to those who just want to throw it all away and start over, I often say, also, part of considering the end of your life is looking back at regret. And sometimes regret is, you know, what you threw away. Relationships, right when they got hard, you quit the things that had some potential because they got hard. And sometimes the yolo mentality from the Instagram crowd becomes, well, if it's. It's hard and you're not completely perfectly passionate about it and it's not exactly right for you at exactly this right time, then bail and. And go do something else. And I think part of regret at the end of people's lives, having spent literally decades studying this topic and talking about end of life, is that it's very easy to forget that regret is often about quitting too soon or not chasing the things that mattered to us with real great discipline and ferocity and focus. And so I just. We'd love for you today to contemplate maybe some things are hard right now and you do want to quit, but you know what? They are on path for you, and they are hard. And, yeah, you're only living once. And part of living once is you want to know you mastered something. The human mind loves competency. We want to know that we dug deep, we tried something, we committed to something, we stayed with something, especially when it matters to us or has responsibilities to other people who we care about. And that, yes, we can make transitions in our lives elegantly, with true authenticity, with true assertiveness, when we have to change something, when we have to leave a relationship. Because, yeah, you only live once. When we have to quit a job, yeah, you only live once. When you want to start something new, yeah, you only live once. But you can make those transitions in responsible ways without crashing and destroying other people's lives. And I think that's the difference maker, is that the philosophical understanding, mortality, motivation wouldn't be to throw it all away and destroy everyone's life or destroy, you know, the responsibilities you have at work or at home. It's more of like, oh, I need to make a responsible, dedicated, slow transition from this thing that isn't part of my life's path, that isn't part of my creative passions, interests, or contributions. Let me make a thoughtful, caring transition into what is more appropriate for me, into more what is an integrity or ambition for me. The idea that we should throw away everything On a heart's moment, because we don't like things, I think has become part of the modern era, which is why so many people aren't happy, too. Because really what they're doing is chasing one distraction after another. That's a little bright, shinier object versus asking about meaning, fulfillment, responsibility. And I think that's the secret of understanding what the ancients were teaching us versus what Instagram would teach us is that, yes, pursue your passions, yes, go after the things that are meaningful and exciting to you, but also don't be the bull in China shop and destroy everything along the way. That there's been times in my life, I'll give you an example, I transitioned from the corporate world to into the entrepreneurial world. I did that very diligently over, you know, a year. Amount of time in planning and thinking through and sort of organizing, architecting that so that my teams were taken care of, so that I had a good reputation, so that everyone, you know, understood or felt good to the extent that I could actually try. Some people didn't like it, but ultimately they had time to digest it. And I've left relationships in my life. When I was dating and single, it was like, okay, this isn't right, but I'm not going to just all of a sudden show up and say, I'm out and leave and have no conversation. It was going to be a transition. And I know that might sound something like, where it's easy to say, oh, that doesn't matter. Who cares? F them. I like that. You know those books that just say, f everybody else. Do your own effing thing. And I'm like, yeah, okay, let's see how that mentality ends up at the end of people's lives. Because at the end of their lives, they've destroyed almost every relationship thinking that way. Because you know what? Other people have feelings, Other people have unique contributions that they're working on that you were tied up in, and when you quickly leave, it can destroy their lives, too. And what we don't want at the end of our lives is destruction of everyone else's, because we just decided to do our own thing. Because I'll tell you what, one beautiful part of the best people I've been with towards the end of lives is a sense of service and selflessness. It's okay to dedicate yourself to something and work to something for the next couple years that isn't exactly perfect, but is responsible for the moment. Now, you might say two years too long. Brendan. I'm going to give them Two months. I'm like, that's cool. That's cool, too. Like a little heads up. That's nice. Before you go on your YOLO adventure, let everybody know around, you know what's happening. You know, give a little bit of heads up so people's lives aren't completely destroyed or their businesses aren't completely compromised. It's okay. Yes. Pursue those passions. Yes. Be awesome to people in your transitions. When you realize that both are possible, then every day is a new day and opportunity to keep steering your ship in the right direction while still maintaining connection and meaning and fulfillment with others. Remember, we're social animals. We don't live on islands by ourselves where we can just say f it all the time. If we did, we'd never get food. We never have relationships. We never feel deep connection or be able to contribute something significant. We need other people in our lives to bring that sense of aliveness, connection, and true meaning and growth. And so it's something to think about today. I hope you enjoyed this simple personal development perspective from the ancients to today. Because guess what, angel? Every day we can learn something new. Every day we can check in how we're making our decisions. Every day is a good day to grow, as Vince Lombardi always taught us. Hey, listen, if you're not fired with enthusiasm, you'll be fired with enthusiasm. You know, there's no chance in this game of life for you to win without that enthusiasm for a new week. I know. It's so easy to wake up on Monday and think, oh, my gosh, I have so many things to do. Here we go again at work. Here we go again with the kids and the finances and the things. Here we go again. And to get bothered by that, to feel like that is a grind. But you woke up with breath. Today you get the opportunity to live out this day the way that you have actually architected the last years of your life. It's always hard on Monday to accept that, that our Mondays look a lot like what our behaviors are, our choices, our strategic decisions have set out to be years ago or months ago. And that never sounds good when a Monday looks challenging or frustrating or you're dealing with ill health, you know, challenging team difficulties in the marketplace or just a bad mood. But you know, when we can accept that truth that we've been setting ourselves up and that, you know what, even when bad things befall us, we still have that power of choice today, that power to choose our attitude today, that power of where should we direct a little bit of our Focus today, how can I bring some joy today? How can, even if it sucks today, how can I honor the struggle of this day to make myself better? How can I see the challenges before me as something that had been put before me to grow me? These challenges aren't bigger than me. I am bigger than these challenges because I will survive them. I will learn through them. I will adapt over them. I will seek help if I need it. I will learn my way around and through life's challenges because I believe in my ability to figure things out. No guilt, no ego, no problems from the years gone by. Right now, today, what is the feeling that you want to have about life? Right now, today, what is the direction you would like to be moving towards? Right now, today, what energy could you create? Summon project that would support your relationships, your creativity, your path forward? Every day you can start new habits. Every day you can reignite your attitude. And that's a big, important thing today. You know, I always like to give you guys a new theme or a new topic in personal development, but I'd like to talk today about something unique to you that's a blessing no matter where you're at and what challenges you're facing. And that is that idea that you have an X factor, that there's something unique to your spirit, your energy, your gifts, your capabilities. Tap into that this week, summon that week. Have the guts to sit down with your planner today or to open up your growth day app, go into your journal or go into your plan and think, what could I uniquely contribute this week? That's your X factor. You know, when I've had the blessings of working with Paulo Coelho in the past, he's the author of the Alchemist, and if you read the Alchemist, he talks about the idea of a personal legend. And I've interviewed Paulo multiple times and met with him, and he's as awesome as you would hope he would be. By the way. I just love this man. And he has this idea that our sense of personal legend, or what you and I might call a personal calling or a purpose. He says the hint of that is enthusiasm. Enthusiasm where we focus on something or we think about something, and this unique spirit of enthusiasm comes up. Not dread, not upset, but just like we love learning about that or love contributing to that. That's part of your X factor. It's part of your given spirit of interests and passions that just evolve over your lifetime that might shift and change. Like when I was a young kid, I mean, martial arts was everything, and then photography was everything. And then personal development was everything, and then business was everything. And each of these areas all aligned to me someday, leading to me getting to do what I could do today. I didn't know those things would line up to this exact career or this exact business model. What I knew was, gosh, I love those things. And so follow those things this week. Those things that uniquely bring you alive. We talk about this all the time in our growth day model, which is aliveness. Those things that bring you aliveness and enthusiasm. Hunt those down, focus on those. Give those time this week. Because you know what's so easy is to just go into your work or go into your work world and just do what everyone else needs of you. And by the way, that's required of servants, that's required of leaders, but it's also required for you to step back and say, okay, where can I input or focus on those unique things for me that bring me alive? I don't care if you only get an hour of that this week or you get 20 hours. It's the whole week. Congratulations. But you got to move towards that and skate towards that this week. Where can you amplify or. Or summon that unique part of yourself? The X factor. The X factor is that enthusiasm, and the X factor is also your choice to lead and serve. Because how you're going to lead and serve is going to be different than how anyone else is going to lead and serve. So you might as well be intentional about it, right? So much of what we talk about growth day and all of personal development is about that intention. Well, I'd love for you to have the intention to open, tap into, or expand your X factor. Your uniqueness, your enthusiasm, your passion, your leadership, your style. This week. Let that thing hunt, man. Unlock that thing. Unclothe that thing. Let the world see what excites you and what your passions are. Stop holding those back and stop failing to schedule time for those and blaming the kids, the project, that dumb boss, those people up there, those over there. No, no, no. Take control of how much you get to ignite that. You know, my. I think my entire business model has been built to support so many of my life's enthusiasms and passions and the things I'm uniquely good at. There's so many things I completely suck at. And you know what? Those things, you can hire, you can delegate. You can choose simply not to do them, and you can start moving more and more of your time at home and at work, more and more of your energy into alignment with that thing that makes you uniquely, enthusiastically, passionately, you. What a beautiful thing to have this week. Remember, you woke up with breath today. You get to choose your attitude and your energy moving forward today. That is a blessing that you get to do all those things that you can make this day that great. Remember, the future holds good things for you, and you're stronger than you think. And every day is a good day to grow. So go in this week.