How to Get People to Follow You

Hello my friends.

I'm Brendon Burchard, host of the Brendon show and founder of growthday.com and I'm honored to be your high performance coach today. I believe that every day we can be inspired. We can live with intention and purpose. We can bring the joy and honor.

The struggles of each day to push.

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Now let's begin my biggest belief, my biggest teaching in all of leadership. And it's five simple worlds. People support what they create. People support what they create. This is the defining leadership principle of my life. Every time I'm working with a leader and they're frustrated with the co worker, they can't get the team to be motivated and energized. The down line isn't performing, the upline isn't listening. We got this problem where you know, you can't mobilize a movement or you started a political action committee and it didn't stick, or you started your nonprofit and no one contributed. It always comes down to a fundamental misperception about this topic of leadership. Leadership's fundamental principle is that people support what they create. If you want people to follow you, they must create with you. They must Feel enabled, trusted, empowered, autonomous, capable, rewarded for participating in the journey in what we'll call the vision today. Right. If they don't have any hand in shaping it, and if they have no reward, autonomy or trust in participating in it, they got no skin in the game. They got no reason to be enthusiastic, excited, hard working, excellent. So what happens? Well, as you see around the world, it's like we have these command and control old models from, you know, the past, these dictatorial ways of leading where it was like, do this, do this, do this, you know, very like, you know, early 1800s stuff that should have been done by the 1950s, but people are still learning. And so you have this situation where a lot of people still think of like, oh, I have positional leadership, I'm the boss, or I'm this leader. Everyone needs to only do these things and it becomes a one way street or it becomes something where the leader doesn't have the connection with everybody else because no one has a part in it. They can't play yet, they don't believe in it yet. Even if they like you, even if they think you're an okay person, even if you had great successes in the past, if you don't get them collaborating to create where we're going, how we're going there, and how we'll be together, they're not interested. They'll pretend they'll take the paycheck, but they'll be gone in six months. Or when the tough times hit or the stock price goes down, they're bailing, man, because they're thinking, you know what? I'm not part of this, I'm not part of this. The new buzzword of the last decade was certainly culture in organizations, even in our homes, right? Create a culture, Create a culture of openness, of diversity, create a culture of enthusiasm, create a culture of accountability. Culture, culture, culture, culture. What does that mean? Culture is the outcome of the philosophy that people support what they create, that we're collectively shaping a culture. Well, we collectively shape the leadership journey too. And so if you don't feel like you have buy in from people, which is the number one complaint of all leaders worldwide. In my research at the High Performance Institute, the number one thing I ever found was that leaders are disappointed, discouraged or demotivated because they don't get buy in from their teams most of the time. They blame the teams, they blame the organizational structure, they blame the old leaders, they blame their spouse, their partner, they blame anybody they can. Why won't the school board listen to me? Why Won't this person, they won't do this. I have this idea. No one comes along. It's because you have this idea and you didn't invite anyone to come along. You just told people what to do, you told people how to think, you told people how it's supposed to go. And I'm telling you, we live in a participative global culture now where people want a voice. And so much of leadership is understanding where to open conversations to allow diverse voices to come in, have a perspective on something. Even if you or the leaders maintain that decision making authority, which we'll talk about later, the active participation and enrollment of conversation is the difference maker. And your job as a leader, listen to this, is to hold that space, to set the standard, the expectation, the structure for that space for other people to participate. Now I know some of the leaders out there like, yeah, but that's super hard, the timing of that and when. And some people have a voice, but they don't know what the hell they're talking about. They're not an expert, Brandon. Why would I listen to them? And oh my gosh, does this mean more meetings for me? Don't worry, this isn't about you doing more meetings. Just to listen casually. We'll get to those practices later. The principle I want you to write down. People support what they create. The five most important words in all of leadership. People support what they create. If you get that principle, we can change the world. When you don't get that principle, you don't get the followers. Now with that I want to introduce a concept, you know, that I've literally been teaching for 21 years now. I don't like the word followers. I don't like the word leaders versus or the position leaders versus followers. If you study with me before, I really believe you have leaders and instead of followers you have collaborators. It's just a different way of defining things. Unfortunately, in our world, because of popularity and ego, when someone follows you on the Internet, it all became about a one way street. And, and so now we've ingrained in people's human behavior this idea that I broadcast my world and you should follow it. That's coming to organizations. I tell you what to do and you should follow it versus hey, we're co creating this organization together, we're co creating this team, we're co creating this marriage, we're co creating this family. Soon as you get that you're co creating your family together, you're a different styled parent.

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Most troubles in parenting relationships and familial relationships come from an old model that it's the parent versus the kids and you do what I say or you're not loved, you're dead to me. That really didn't work so good. We've learned that to have healthy and adaptive children, they need to feel part of the family process. They need to feel connected, cared for and collaborative literally in how their day goes, how their life goes. They need to have a voice in it or later in their life, they're more passive towards chasing what's important to them. They never develop that autonomy early enough. So now, unfortunately, they do. They follow whatever's happened at school, they follow whatever's happening with that peer set, and they follow it often right into places you didn't want them to go. And so by controlling them too much, it removes their autonomy. By removing their autonomy now, they'll follow often the wrong people at the wrong time, stay in the wrong relationships because they didn't develop personal autonomy. Why? Because someone in their life too late failed to realize that this person had to be participating in shaping their life, their days, their weeks, their dreams, their destiny earlier. And I think that's so important in this world today, where you get a lot of blind followership to ideology or darker, kind of like the darker side of humanity, where people don't question or they don't think because they haven't been participating in shaping their life. And we have to be aware of. Of that is leaders. It's like, oh, you're going to have some people on your team who are super participative, and other people, they were never given autonomy or trust or a voice, and they're super smart, but you're not getting enough from them. They just need to be enrolled to participate in a different way than the person who's always had the benefit of being in communities where they were heard. We live in a world right now where so many people have never actually been heard, then we expect them to perform as high performers in their organizational settings. It's like, oh, you have to be aware of these things. Some members of your team and some members of your family haven't been heard, haven't felt heard, haven't been allowed space for it. And I don't just mean listened to. I mean being allowed space to make decisions together about what's important. And that's just so critical. People support what they create. So you got to be thinking, I would love for you to evaluate yourself as a leader. Go. Okay, on a scale. This is the workshop part. This is personal development, right? We're going to do the work. If you wrote down people support what they create. I'm curious, on a scale of one to ten, one. You don't get that one's a bad number. Okay, one's the worst. I won't give you a zero.

We'll give you a one.

And then there's ten. I'm going to ask you two questions to score yourself here one to ten. First score, how conscious have you been about this principle? Like when I say people who support their crate, you're like, oh, yeah, I get that. I've been doing that. I'm aware of that. That's important to me. One has not been on my radar. Ten. That's been on my radar. Did you know the higher you score on that, the higher life satisfaction you have, the higher connection you have with your employees, the longer your employees tend to stay employees? I know that's not. You're not all organizational leaders, but it basically means that the better you've been conscious about this and practicing it, the happier your culture, your team, and others are. They want to be on that journey. So put that front of dashboard. I call it front of radar. That's on your radar. That's on your dashboard. Have I been leading in this style or at least aware of this? People support what they create. Okay, got it. The second way I'd love you to score that is to take a look at the most critical members of your team. Maybe this is your executive team or the most important people in your life, your family. And look at each of them individually through this lens. It's like, oh, has this person been co creating the experience with me? Have they been active in that or passive in that? And not as a judgment to them like a one, they're bad. It's that, oh, if they are a one, I as a leader need to create a process, a rhythm, a meeting, an opportunity for, for this person to get some decision making authority, to establish some trust, if anything to be heard more in meetings. Maybe this person is never called on, they never get the opportunity. And you're going to like, oh, I'm going to be aware this person has not been participating and I need that participation from them if we're going to have long term success and we need to participate together. So let me have that. So I'm always thinking about that of and when I work with leaders and I coach them in high performance, it's always about, okay, let's work through your team, let's walk through this principle and let's talk about each of these critical team members and do they feel empowered to be part of the process because people support what they create is ultimately people being part of the process. Because guess what, when they're part of the process, they've helped come up with decisions. They're working towards something they had a hand in, they fight for it, they stay focused on it, they have ego and decision making in that process and they want to protect it. When someone has an idea, you know what they want to do, they want to own that, they want to protect that, they want to perpetuate that, they want to ensure that that idea lives. And they'll do that sometimes sanely and unsanely. You could look at across humanity, the worst of the human conditions and human actions in the world came from people who had an idea and they believed it and they shaped it and they fought for it till death when it was destructive towards others. And the most beautiful parts, the better angels of our nature came from those times in which we had an idea. We were participating in that idea, continuing, shaping it, evolving it, making it even better. And as we made that even better, oh, okay, we made it together, better together. We'll fight for it, we'll participate in it, but we'll do it for positive ends. It's a difference maker, isn't it? If you look around the world, even today, like at higher political levels as an example. And that idea of democracy, of a participative democracy, that's a different way of thinking. And it changed the shape of history. And you saw people still, we're still refining what our republic is and how it works together. We're still trying to figure out our systems and our rules. We're still working on an active democracy. And that's an incredible thing and an incredible blessing. And it's one reason why the country leads the world, right? People support what they create. Now, I don't want to get political with you or people like, oh, I don't agree with this, or I love Americans or whatever. I'm just here to say there is definable, demonstratable and great examples across organizations, across political systems, across socioeconomic systems that when people are allowed to participate, better ideas come up, people have more buy in, people stay committed over the long term and humans become more resilient themselves. It's important. It's so important. So please take a. Take an active role in this day. Score yourself, be honest and think about this and how you can amplify this. If all you did is understand this principle and you practice this principle at the deepest levels, you would so far surpass almost everybody you're working with. I promise.

Okay, my friend, I hope you enjoyed this episode of the Brendon Show. Tell some people about this episode. It's on each of us to spread positivity and empowerment during these times of chaos and negativity, right? So I'm asking you to be the dealer of hope and personal growth and education in your tribe. So take a screenshot right now and share the screenshot and this link to this episode with three of your friends today. Post it on social media, use the hashtag growthday. That's growthday, because that's the name of my company and we're always giving away prizes to our community. If you'd like to help me personally, then please rate and review the podcasts on Apple Podcasts. Give us some stars, cheer us on, leave a review. Because believe it or not, that stuff actually really does help. And I read all of them. So my last thought for today, please remember you are stronger than you think and the future holds good things for you. Tomorrow can be an inspired day. Every new morning is a second chance. Every day is a great day to grow. We're thankful to have you here in the Growth Day community, so be sure to go deeper with us@growthday.com.

Sam.