Mastering Change: Your Life Themes

Welcome to the Charged Life. This is Brendan Burchard. Hey, my friends, it's Brendan. And welcome back to another special edition of the Charged Life where we're talking about how to master change. You know, as you go for that big next new level, you try to achieve extraordinary things and live the best quality of life you, you possibly can. You gotta learn how to navigate change. You gotta do a good job at that. You know, if you want to change a behavior, a habit, a belief, a mindset, change or influence another person, the way to do that, well, you can go about it kind of just off the cuff or you can learn some new strategies, new tools, new approaches to doing that. And that's what this podcast series is all about. We've been talking about how to master change in our last two episodes. If you missed them, highly recommend you download those and listen to those and then listen to this one as well. Because I think you'll find that these are progressing in a way that's purposeful, that this special series we're doing on how to master change progresses very similarly to the character in the book that is inspiring this series, which is the book called Life's Golden Ticket. If you're not on my list, my email list, make sure you go to Brenden.com that's B R E N-O-N.com sign up. So you're getting these updates. But what I've been doing is promoting Life's Golden Ticket. It's a story about redemption, about personal change, about second chances. And in this campaign I decided, well, let's answer the most frequently asked questions we get from our podcast community. And that has been how do you change? How do you make it stick? How do you do a good job of that? So we have a special right now. If you haven't heard about it, go over to lifesgoldenticket.com that's lifesgoldenticket.com and you'll see that you can order Life's Golden Ticket on paperback or Kindle on Amazon. And when you do that, you just enter your receipt number on that page. Life's Golden Ticket. And I give you brand new online course called the Four Gates to Lasting Change. This will help you master the next big change in your life, whatever it is, whether it's in your health, your relationships, your career. You'll also get a video on the lessons that I learned writing and launching a best selling book. So book authors or potential book authors, it's worth doing it just for that. And you'll get a new webinar. I did a short 45 minute power punch packed webinar called the Five Productivity Habits, the World's Most Successful People. It's just 45 minutes on how to get ahead faster no matter what you're trying to do. And it has some of my favorite habits and tactics and strategies in it. You get all that when you just get a paperback version or the Kindle version on Amazon. Just do it all via the link and the instructions@lifesgolden ticket.com so in this session of the Charge Life, what I want to talk about on the topic of mastering change is understanding your life's themes. Your life themes. A lot of people don't realize that, you know, essentially our life is really a story and that throughout that story emerging themes are always present, but we're not usually aware of what they are. And I thought today I'd help reveal some of those. You know, if you've heard me talk about this topic before, you know that really there's only two narratives in the human story and those themes are struggle and progress. But there's also a more fine level that we can look into our lives and understand the themes that have been developing that are also now, currently, subconsciously or unconsciously that we may be unaware of, that are dictating our beliefs, our behaviors, and setting limits what's possible for us. Sometimes we just don't understand the power of the past in shaping who we are today. The good news is we can always wake up, choose to be different. Because you know what, no matter what someone goes through in their life, including the character in life's golden ticket, at some point, no matter what you've been through, no matter how much you diagnose the past, it comes back to today. Who are you going to be today? What energy are you going to choose to exude today? Today? What are you going to share about yourself today? What are you after today? What are your aims? What amount of discipline or habits will you choose to enact today? All these things shape our lives, obviously. But I think it's important that we also look back once in a while to see what has been shaping us, what shaped us from the past and is still shaping us today. So here's what I like to do, help you get an indication of this. I'm actually going to read a little segment of life's golden ticket to you today and it'll give you a feel for the book, but also the lessons that I want to impart, probably more succinctly that I could do rambling. And if you have not read life's golden ticket or gotten it, it's, again, a story. It's a parable. A lot like the Alchemist is a. Is a parable. It's a story of a guy going on an adventure who learns about his life and learns what's important. Well, life's golden ticket's kind of like that. It's just my character goes to this abandoned amusement park, and when he walks through the park gates, it magically comes back to life. And he's there because his fiance had disappeared. And she turned up 40 days later in a hospital bed, claiming to have experienced all these miracles at the amusement park. As her last wish, she hands him this envelope, says, go to the park. Find out what happened to me. He takes the envelope, goes to the abandoned amusement park. When he walks through the gates, it comes back alive. And he suddenly meets all these characters, these carnies, these clowns, these people who work at the park who know everything about her and everything about him somehow. And he meets this sort of guide through the park. His name is Henry. Henry is the groundskeeper, and Henry is sort of his keeper as well. Through this adventure, Henry is the one revealing to him why his life turned out the way it did, why he thinks, the way he does, where he got stuck and why, and what he might need to do to change. He's kind of like his high performance coach, if you will, you know, in the language of what we usually talk about in the charge life. But I want to read you this excerpt. What's happened is Henry, moments ago, put this character on the Ferris wheel. And as the character was put on the Ferris wheel, it started speeding up faster and faster and faster. And he started seeing images and scenes from his life. And now, after that experience, Henry and the character are sitting on a park bench, and Henry is trying to help the character learn the lessons and the themes that have sort of dominated the character's life. Now, the character does not have a name. That's one of the questions we always basically get in some way or another, because people say, oh, Brennan, I love life, school, and take a. Change my life. It saved my career. It saved my relationship. It made me start anew. What was the character's name again? And what they don't realize is it was a writer's trick. The character's never named. Instead, you're reading it from first person. So I looked at this. I saw that, I experienced that. So the character never has a name. The protagonist, the main character of the story has no name. It's you. And that's why the book affects so much change in so many people's lives, because you're reading this and it starts to feel like your story at some point. So I share all that to give the context of where we're at in the book. For those who have the book or want to read along, we're at page 50. We're on the chapter called the Parkes theme. It's really about the themes of our life. And that's the value I want to add to you in this session today, going back and looking at a few of the conflicts or challenges or blessings from the past that have shaped your today. So Henry and the character sitting on a park bench. And Henry asks the character to reveal to him what were the scenes he saw on the Ferris wheel when it sped up? What did you see? And the character begins with this. The first thing I saw was an image of my dad. He was angry. Henry asked, what was he upset about? Me. I did something I wasn't supposed to. What was that? I ruined the remote control to the television. Thinking about how trivial of an incident it was, I almost laughed. We had a fish tank. I thought the remote would make a good submarine. Henry chuckled. Did it float? Not even close. It did what submarines are supposed to do. It sank to the bottom. My arms were too short to reach, so I went to the closet and grabbed a wire coat hanger and tried to fish it out. But I got distracted and tried to fish out a fish. Dad walked in, and there I was holding a fish in my palms, standing on a stool above a tank filled with nervous fish, a coat hanger and his remote control. Henry laughed again. So what'd your dad say? Not much. He screamed at me for being a pest and came storming toward me. I got so scared I dropped the fish as he got closer. I panicked and jumped off the stool to get away from him and landed on the fish. I remember looking up at my father in horror. You landed on the fish? What was your dad's reaction? The image of my father's furious face flashed in my mind. He said, you, you stupid little. Look what you've done. Then he unbuckled his belt. I tried to get away from him, but he pinned me on the couch and. Well, anyway, that's the first image I saw on the Ferris wheel. I stared off into the crowd. Henry let a few moments pass. The kids on the Ferris wheel seemed so happy. Finally, Henry said, I know it's not easy to talk about that sort of thing. I've had some experience with it myself, so I appreciate you telling me about it. I know that happened a long time ago, but if you could go back and step into your young mind, what did you begin to think about yourself at that time? Think about myself? I asked reflectively. I don't know. I guess I just thought I was an idiot. A pest. An idiot and a pest? Henry asked. So did you change your behavior after that incident? Sure. I stopped being a pest. I kept quiet and stayed out of my dad's way. That's what you do with a tough dad. How'd that work, staying out of the way? Did the abuse stop? Sort of. I mean, when I was out of his way, there wasn't a problem. Were you scared of your father? I laughed. Who isn't scared of their father? I think a lot of people grew up like I did. The world isn't full of rainbows and ward cleavers, you know. Listen, do we really need to psychoanalyze this? I know what my dad did was wrong, and I got over it a long time ago. Do we really need to talk about it anymore? No, henry said softly. Not right now. But understand that you saw that scene because it undoubtedly became a theme in your life in some way. But yeah, let's move on. What did you see next? I told Henry about my grandfather's death. He had suffered for weeks in the hospital, battling liver cancer. My family visited him often, especially in his final days. My dad would work to keep the visits light hearted, but the second we walked out of the hospital, he would curse Grandpa for his years of drinking. The night before Grandpa passed away, there was an argument. Dad didn't come back the next day because he was so angry. As Grandpa began to die, I was the only one in the room. Mom had gone to call dad and beg him to come. Grandpa's last words to me were, you tell your dad I forgive him and that I always loved him. I stood crying as he wheezed his last, final breath. A nurse came in when the buzzers went off. She saw me crying but didn't say anything. She just unplugged Grandpa from the machines, pulled the sheet over his head, and told me to leave the room. Later that night, I told my father about my grandpa's last words. Dad looked at me and teared up. Then he smacked me to the ground and called me a lying little shit. He said I had made it all up just to make him feel better. How old were you when that happened? Henry asked. 12 what stands out to you about that incident? Just how sad I was when Grandpa died. How uncaring and cold the nurse was. How dad didn't believe me at that time. Why did you think your dad didn't believe you? I think I just thought I was a bad kid, A bad communicator. Like I couldn't even explain what Grandpa had said to me. Did your relationship with your dad change after that? Yeah. We grew further apart. He never really mentioned Grandpa again. Neither did I. As a matter of fact, we didn't mention much of anything to each other after that. I looked to Henry for his next question. Letting him know that I was ready to move on. Okay, he said, picking up on my signal. Next scene you saw. The next scene was from my sophomore year in high school. I was one of the smallest guys on the basketball team, but not the smallest kid. A kid named Jimmy Smelts was 2 inches shorter. We called him Smally. He and I took a lot of guff from the other older varsity players. We were the only red shirts, and they were sure to let us know we were below them. One day I walked in the locker room and found Smalley tied up naked to one of the metal posts in the communal shower. He was gagged with a sock and duct tape over his mouth. Tears streaked his face above the tape. I grabbed my pocket knife to cut him loose. As I bent down to cut the rope from his ankles, Clark Jones, our point guard and the most popular kid in school, snapped a picture capturing me and Smalley in an awkward position. Clark said he was going to print the picture and plaster it all over school. I tried to get the camera away from him, but he wouldn't give it to me. I broke his nose an hour later. My mother pleaded with the principal not to expel me. I received six weeks of in school suspension and was kicked off the team. Clark Jones went unpunished and won us a championship. My mom took my side and told me never to blindly trust a person of authority again to help. Dad just ignored me and called me a troublemaker from then on. You must have thought the world was pretty unfair after that, Henry said. I think I knew long before that. So what stands out to you about this one? Just how damn mean people were to tie Jimmy up like that. I mean, how bad was that for him, man? And then the principle to punish me and not Clark. That was ridiculous. It just goes to show that if you stick your head out to protect other people, you're just going to get whacked. Did you do what your mom told you? Henry asked. What's that? Not trust authority figures again. In a way, I definitely made people earn my trust. Did many people ever earn it? No. Why not? The next scene popped into my mind. Because you can never really trust anyone. Wait till you hear my next story. The fourth scene I saw atop the Ferris wheel had taken place in a white, cold office. A consultant was sitting in front of me, thanking me for my eight years of hard work. Unfortunately, he said my salary was too big a burden on the company and I had to be let go. I was being replaced, he said, by a cheaper resource. I asked who would take my place, thinking that Benny, one of my senior managers for the past five years and now a new dad, was ready and deserving. Instead, the consultant coolly told me that my job was being outsourced to a 21 year old in India. Don't worry though, he said. We, we're offering a very nice severance package for people who gave so much to this company. I got six weeks pay. Two days later, Benny was laid off too. How does that grab you for fairness and trust? I asked Henry. I gave them eight years of my life and they gave me six weeks and a slap in the face. It just goes to show, you never know what's going to happen. You think it was unfair, a slap in the face to be laid off? You better believe it. I was so pissed. It was. It was like I wasn't valuable enough for them to pay me. Or even. They didn't even have the decency to offer a pay cut. They just replaced me with some kid. How unlucky can you get? Sounds like you're still upset about it. I am, I said peevishly. The more I thought about it, the more my blood boiled. Okay, so let's not get stuck there. What did you see next? The scene that played next in my mind cooled me down instantly, flooding my senses with sadness. I saw Mary slamming the door behind her, I said, feeling a lump growing in my throat as I recalled the night my fiance left me. I couldn't believe she had left. I just stood there. I didn't say anything, didn't do anything. I knew she was unhappy, but I didn't know how unhappy. I just felt like, you know, I knew she felt like we weren't heading anywhere. I think she always thought she'd marry someone who made her feel better. And, you know, a few months after we got engaged, I think she came to the realization that I might not be that person. I wasn't good enough for her. And in the last few months, it was like she really got intent on changing me. When I didn't get with the program, she became more and more upset, and then she slammed the door and disappeared. Do you really believe that you weren't good enough for her? Henry asked. Yes, no doubt. Mary was always an angel to me. I just. I wasn't an angel back. What did you think when she didn't return? When she disappeared, I immediately thought something was wrong. It was always bad luck for people. All I could think of was all the terrible things that could have happened to her, all because I pushed her away. And something terrible did happen. She I stopped and looked Henry in the eyes, remembering suddenly why we were all talking about this. You said all this was something to do with the themes in my life. So what do you see? You want to know? Henry asked. Yeah. Okay. Let me reflect back to you what I've heard, and let's see if we can figure it out. I think there are some powerful patterns weaving through the scenes you just described to me. Let me give you my take. First, there might be a theme to what you've been taught about the world. I think you've learned that the world is a pretty dark place. As you said when talking about your dad, the world isn't full of rainbows and word cleavers. Your father's abuse taught you that the world was a dangerous place. Your grandfather's passing taught you that the world was a sad place. You learned that the world was unfair from your high school principal, that if you stuck your neck out, you'd get whacked. Your layoff taught you that the world was un unappreciative and uncertain. When Mary disappeared, you learned the world was out to get you. After all, you were always bad luck for people. Am I on track so far? I nodded. Okay, I think there's another theme. This one concerning what you learned about other people. Your interactions with your dad taught you that other people were unkind, hurtful. That there weren't a lot of dads like you see on tv. Your grandfather's nurse taught you that people were cold and uncaring. Your basketball teammates taught you that people were cruel. Your principal taught you that they were unfair. The consultant who laid you off showed you that people were generally cool, even uncaring about other people's circumstances. Mary may have taught you that the people who love you might leave you if you're not good enough. Am I making sense? Another nod. Finally, I think there's a theme to what you learned about yourself. You came to believe that you were an idiot and a pest because of your father. You thought you were a bad communicator after delivering your grandfather's message and getting smacked for it. You learned you were a problem child after standing up for yourself. Losing your job taught you you weren't valuable. And your relationship with Mary taught you that you were not good enough and that you were a lightning rod of bad luck for others. Is that about right? I stared at him, dumbfounded. Yes, I said. So the themes that have woven throughout your story sound like the world is a dark place. Other people are unfair and hurtful. You yourself are inadequate. Now let me ask you something. Do you think these themes might have affected how you lived your life? Of course. Do you think you adopted a positive or negative mindset? Negative. Do you think you were more open with people or more closed with people because of your experiences? Closed. Do you believe you deserve happiness and love or unhappiness and heartbreak? The image of my dad smacking me to the ground after Grandpa's death flashed in my mind. Heartbreak, I suppose. Hmm, henry muttered. So the people and events in your life taught you to be negative, closed off, and doubtful of your worth. That's a pretty good prescription for a tough life, huh? I guess, I said, feeling myself closed down even as I said was also a prescription for running Mary right out of my life. Henry stood up. Well, if that's a prescription for a tough life, I gotta tell you something. You swallowed it whole. You let the themes in your life become your beliefs, and you let those beliefs guide your behaviors. You swallowed what the world taught you hook, line, and sinker without ever questioning it. Now, maybe you were too young to question those lessons then, but you should have questioned, or at least revisited them as an adult. But you didn't. And it cost you big time. He must have seen the surprise on my face. Sonny, I'm just calling it like I see it. You want to know why you lost Mary? I stared at him blankly, afraid I already knew the answer. Why would she want to stay with a pessimistic, shut off, moping smo like me? Henry nodded as if he could hear my thoughts. Then he shook his head. She left because she felt even worse than you did. He paused while his words sank in. Worse than I felt. Why don't you come with me? He said. There's something you have to see for yourself. I can't explain it to you. It's too sickening. That ends the chapter called the Parks Theme. Those are seven pages in Life's golden ticket. If any of that resonated with you, maybe it's good that we're here today to have this conversation. I don't want to ruin the rest of the story for you, but I know a lot of that sounds like some pretty heavy stuff. And in a couple chapters, what this character learns and discovers through viewing some scenes of his past is that he also had some very positive influences in his life. Very positive moments when he was surrounded by his family, when there was love, when his grandmother taught him something, There were some just beautiful moments of his life. And Henry ultimately helps him realize that when he thought of his past or he thought of himself, he always zoomed in on the negative stuff. And he obsessed about him, he worried about him. He felt victim to them, he blamed them. He used them as excuses for bad adult behavior. And Henry ultimately says, you know, I think it's too bad you've been kind of returning to the wrong ride in your life because you had these beautiful moments and these great memories that you didn't revisit those as much as you revisit the negative ones. Because, you know, our attention is so easily drawn to negativity, to hurt, to hardship, to the difficult times of life. And then we don't pay as much attention to those maybe smaller, less dramatic moments that were filled with beauty or learning or breakthroughs or just simple, every day blessed moments. And that's the reality of a lot of folks. And that's the problem. When we develop themes or ways of being in our life, we often are developing those based off of the negative things of the past, even though there were positive ones too. So where is your attention going when you think about yourself, the world, other people? Is the attention going to the great things of the past where you can have at least a moment of fondness, satisfaction, fulfillment, nostalgia. That's beautiful. Or are you always going back to the wars and the conflicts and the bad things? Because look, your memory is a weapon. It can shape you today. Where you aim that weapon is important. You can aim it into the land of grace and heaven, or you can aim that thing right into the ground, right into hell. You get to choose your focal points in life. Maybe it's time to explore the positive things that you've learned as much as the negative things. I know you probably already know that, but sometimes. A good reminder. Yeah. And what I'd like to share in today's lesson is that there's been themes that have woven throughout your life. And there's three dominant themes that are shaping your dominant psychology today. The frames in which you see the world, and those are what you have been taught about the world in general, what you've been taught about other people and what you've been taught about yourself. See, a lot of people, they grew up in a very positive, joyful, loving, abundant world. You know, there were nice people on the block, trusting people at school, happy people all around them. And so their frame of reference was happiness, joy, abundance, safety. Not everyone had that experience. You know, I grew up in an old Irish mining town in a place called Butte, Montana. Beautiful, beautiful people. Hard working Americans there, but, you know, an economically depressed town for almost a century. And it was tough. Safety was a concern. There was, you know, always empty lots and vacant buildings. People fought growing up, lots of people fought. I mean, families fought, people fought. And when I say fought, I mean physically fought. If you did something bad where I grew up, you got smacked, you got punched. When you did something bad at school, they busted out the paddle. Do you remember the paddle? I don't know how old you are, but we got the paddle. When I grew up in school, that's that board with a bunch of holes in it. And somehow I think they put the holes in it to make the air go through it faster so they could, bam. Get you a better pop. And that's where I grew up. It was maybe an uncertain world, scary and dangerous world. This character's story in life, school and ticket, by the way, is not mine. There's nothing autobiographical in this at all. It was just, I'm trying to convey a message. But I grew up in a pretty tough place. But I was lucky too, because my parents, they kind of overrode that message a little bit because in my family there was a lot of love. Even though my dad was tough on us, he had served 20 years in the Marines. Tough guy, three tours in Vietnam. Gunnery sergeant, good man. But I can share with you it was a tough town and it could make a person untrusting. But I lucked out. Sometimes the people around you can override the messages of the environment around you. It's why right now, in a negative culture, right now, where the world, you know, so often, especially because the media is communicating dark, negative messages, it's important to have positive people around you who can help you have a better mindset. And I hope you're that positivity for somebody's life who's living in what they feel like is a dark world or had those experiences where they grew up in what felt like a dark or dangerous place. Because sometimes you being that role model of good, positive energy that shifts the world more than writing a check to a nonprofit. It's how you show up. And the energy in which you are giving the world is a recurring theme I keep talking about in Life's Golden Ticket and in this series with you. It's so important that we realize we're emitting an energy into the world. And to be more conscious about that is to ultimately not only make a greater impact, but to live a better life. You know, what have you been taught about the world? Safe, dangerous, good, bad. But I know that might seem basic, but now I'm curious. Who taught you that? Like the way you think about the world, good or bad, by the way, positive or negative in general, who shaped that and when they shaped it and how it's formed in you? Did you give their voice too much or too little an ear? Meaning? Are there some people you shouldn't have listened to so much? And are there others you should have? What about what you've learned about other people? Are they good, kind, trusting? Are they helpful? Are they like you? Or are they bad, scary, dangerous? Unlike you? Is there a division between you and other people? And who taught you those things, positive or negative? Who were your influences that taught you about other people? See, we should always be conscious of that. If you feel one way about a certain demographic of people, why do you feel that? Who taught you that? And did you listen to them too much or too little? It's good to know our major influencers in life so that when we have an unconscious thought or we have a sudden impulse or intuition, we can identify maybe where those seeds had been sown. What about yourself? Are you a pest? Are you a troublemaker? Are you a maverick? Are you a jerk? Are you an ass? Are you a nuisance? Are you an angel? A blessing, gift, Unique, important, loved? Who told you about your identity? You're good enough. Not you deserve happiness. You don't. Who told you these things? You know, as we're talking about mastering change here, all this might sound very random, but I bet you can put the pieces together where I'm going with all this. We've all been influenced in our worldview. We've all been influenced in our relationships. We've all been influenced in how we think about ourselves. And if we never explore those influences and then choose to override them consciously in one way or another, then we're caught in a world of unconscious reaction. You know, you're having this fight with your spouse, and it's the same fight you heard your parents have. You feel negative about finances because that person in your life hated rich people. You think tomorrow is going to be worse than today. You're a doomsdayer because you grew up around somebody who is a pessimist pro parading around as what they called themselves, a realist when they were really an apocalyptic person. You know, it's important to evaluate our past. What themes keep coming up for you? You know, there's themes of all those big areas. How we think of the world, how we think of others, how we think of ourselves. I just think sometimes right before a major change, it's good to sit down and think through those. If you're going to quit your job and try to start your own business. Finally, before you do it, before you do it, remember that the first gate of change is awareness. If you haven't bought life's golden ticket, please do. Because you get this online course called the Four Gates of Lasting Change. The first big gate to change is awareness. And I walk you through how to get there. But it's important to be aware of. How do you feel about starting your business? Where does that feeling come from? Who influenced the way you think about entrepreneurship, wealth and finances? And with whatever those influences were, what are you going to consciously choose to feel and think about as you approach this new endeavor? See, most people are lacking conscious intention as they move into a new change. So they move into doing something and they're just kind of going by the seat of their pants. Well, I'll feel this out, they say, and they're in a good way. They're going with the flow. They're being spontaneous. But those also have their costs. When going with the flow means being operated by old beliefs, patterns, behaviors that someone instilled to you that you never explored as an adult and chose. So as you go into any next big change, I want you to sit down and say, okay, I'm an adult now. Let me choose how I'm going to approach this. Let me, before I go into this, what do I really think about the world? And more importantly, what would I need to think about the world in order to succeed at this? Okay, what do I think about other people who might be involved in this business? My customers, my clients, my partners, my friends, my employees? And where do those feelings come from? How do I think about them? Why? And then to ask that again, that conscious adult question, okay, what would I need to do? How would I need to perceive these folks in order to make myself successful here? Because Sometimes we have to rewire our past. We have to rewire our brain. We have to rethink everything to approach a new endeavor. What about how we think about ourselves? See, a lot of people make the mistake of saying, well, I'd love to be successful like that person, but I'm not like them. And I like to say, how do you know you're not like them? And they almost always say, well, you know, I wasn't like that as a kid. Or, you know, you know, people told me I can't do that. Or they say, well, I just, I don't see myself being able to do that. And I say, why? And it always comes back down to at some point they hadn't actually thought about it. They're operating off of what is an impulse of fear versus an intention to grow and be or become something that would be necessary for them to have their dream. Does that make sense? If any of this is resonating with you, then I'm glad we got to connect here. Yeah, you know, I don't spend a whole lot of time going back into people's lives and doing past regression. I don't do a lot of work trying to hypnotize, which I don't know how to do. People, you know, and to have them rethink their past. Because I'm a coach, I focus more on today. Because even if we do that big, long journey into someone's past, even a psychologist, even the deepest hardcore old school psychologist, psychiatrist, therapists would tell you that no matter how far back they go, there's still the same goal that we all have, which is then to arrive to today, to this moment, to this hour, and to ask, what new healthy decisions and habits can I make for myself moving forward despite the past, despite where I've been, despite what I've been told about myself, the world and others. Now, this moment, this magical, blessed second of our lives, who are we going to choose to be? How are we going to treat other people? What are we going to do out in the world that you can choose that today, regardless of the past, that is life's golden ticket, the perennial second chance. The every blessed day that we get to wake up, take a nice breath in, have air in our lungs, says, hey, this day can be different. Today I can treat my kids more kindly. Today I can say thank you at work more often. Today I can make that call and finally apologize. Today I can take three new steps towards something that scares me instead of keep sputtering and going backwards. Today is the day the power and the beauty of that simple, elegant statement, today is the day is what changes so many people's lives. Because some of us, you know, I had to go through car accidents and bankruptcies and broken bones and difficulties and ridicule and in building this thought leader industry, building my career, that new industry. But as I'm here, as I think back to all of it, I'm so glad that when I was a 19 year old kid, I had a car accident that made me question life and made me say what's really important to me. Who do I want to be now, regardless of who I was in high school? Because we all have the blank page tomorrow. How are you going to fill it? Who's the character that's going to start showing up in the next chapters of your book of life? What's the pivot point? Because if you're still here, if you haven't hit pause and bailed on us, if you're still listening to this right now, there's a reason. I don't know if you believe that, but I do. I just believe that there aren't really coincidences. There's people we're supposed to listen to, there's people we're supposed to learn from. And if I'm still in your ear, if you haven't bailed, if something is resonating with you, then right now it is a second chance for you. It's a second chance to be an even more extraordinary business person. It's a second chance for you to be even more kind and loving in your relationship. It's a second chance to be a role model, a leader, even more than you've been in the past. Because that's the beauty of second chances. They allow us to not only just sometimes start anew, but they allow us to catch momentum. They allow us to become better. They allow us to become more. And that's the beauty of each moment of second chance. Because you know what? Don't think that you need some big amazing event for your moment of redemption to show itself. Because there's power in now, in this moment, in this peaceful place that we have between this second and the next second in which we get to live with a little more intention. And if we can do that, we start to earn it. I hope you enjoyed this session today. Yep. I'll be back again tomorrow talking about some more themes like these that come right out of the pages of life's golden ticket. Do me a favor. If you enjoyed this podcast, share it, tell a friend to listen to it. If something resonated with you and you know your kid needs to hear it, your spouse needs to hear it, something, someone grab the link, share it with a friend, help spread the message. Again, I'm only able to do all of this work that I do by your support because we have and have chosen never to have a sponsor or advertiser on the podcast, on the YouTube show and on the blog. I don't sell ads, I don't give sponsorships, even though we turn down multiple seven figures a year in terms of sponsorships for that type of thing. I just want this to be about you and this community and I always want to be in your life. And the only way I can do that is if you support. You know, grab a copy of life's golden ticket today and if you do, I'll give you those bonuses I talked about. Just go to lifesgoldenticket.com for full details. But yeah, it's by you sharing this podcast that maybe more people buy a book, maybe more people join an online course or come to our events one day. And it's in that process that I can self fund the entire endeavor. And so I appreciate your support in any way you can. Sharing this podcast, getting a book, whatever you can do, I honor it and I appreciate it because you all make my world a much more positive and beautiful place too. Until tomorrow, go out there and realize that you know, the next moment you have, do something magical with it today. Surprise somebody, give some kindness or positivity, do something today with this. If you got any depth or inspiration out of this, use it today. And then as always, make sure that you live fully, love openly, and you make that difference that you have been brought to this world to make.