RIP the Gentleman

Happy holidays, my friends. Every year end I spend some time thinking about not just my life and my year, but a bigger picture of what's been going on in our world, in our society, in our culture. And I'd like to spend some time also thinking about what virtues I demonstrated in the world or didn't, and also what virtues may have been lost or sometimes neglected in the turmoil of the year. And of course we had some very difficult turmoil this year in terms of the political process. And it brought up a lot of challenges in the ways that people demonstrated and conducted themselves. And so, as I was thinking this year, what is the virtue that I feel like society kind of lost or lost an example of or a struggled with the most? I decided to write this little piece. I posted it today and it went pretty darn viral. And I just like to read it to you and get you, if anything, just thinking about what do you think society lost this year? What were some of the messages that weren't there, that were usually there? How did people used to conduct themselves and how do they conduct themselves now? Not in terms of doing this as an activity in judgment, but an activity of self reflection and an activity in which hopefully we can all become better people and better leaders. The post was called Rest in Peace the Gentleman. Much was lost this year. Let us hope that the ideal of being a gentleman has not gone extinct too. The gentleman is honest, kind, and strong in character. His actions show a deep respect for women and care for all. He looks people in the eye and welcomes them into the moment with genuine warmth. He is courteous and so he does not lash out like a child, call others bad names, say crude things, stew, rumor, or minimize others. He issues no fake gestures and promises, does no pandering for position and popularity. He is centered and real, and so he is disarming. He creates the safety in which others freely speak and learn and be. He is generous in giving time and praise. His duty is above self promotion. So in his presence, others are empowered to rise and lead. He is stoically loyal in relationships, but wildly independent in thought. His opinion is formed slowly, built on the foundation of listening and careful study. He admits his wrongs and in doing so does not make the other wrong. He is quick to forgive. He does not incite the crowd with anger simply because he can. He can stare into the abyss of fear and intolerance and not be consumed because he recognizes his own weaknesses, sees good in others, and trusts the better angels of our nature shall prevail. He has humility. He is above no one but his own weaker self. He does not turn his nose at the words that sound like work those like discipline, duty, dedication, devotion. For this he is distinguished among men yet he is rarely boastful except in celebrating others. He is comfortable with himself and finds pleasure in simple things and wit in all occasions he faces adversity with dignity and boldness. He has the good sense to know when to quit and avoid a needless fight and still the spirit to be committed and firm when moral influence is needed. In the steady manner in which he faces all challenge he inspires others to be thoughtful to believe in their own powers to persevere. His good manners make him a welcomed guest his reverence for life makes him a cherished friend. His example is rare but it is needed. So let us celebrate him let us resurrect him in our time of mean obliviousness Let us ask who in the new generation will carry the torch of the gentleman sa.