074: Maria Sipka - What Does a Meaningful Life Look Like?

Are you thinking about how to grow your business with near and offshore staffing, but you're also wanting to make sure that it's reliable, cost effective and really well done? I think docsa talent is the way to go. Here's why. They don't just fill your jobs. They bring integrity, top talent and a people first approach that's hard to find. I've known the people at Doxa talent for over 20 years now and I say that you can count on them. I have. Talk to Docs of Talent and you won't be disappointed. Go to docsatant.com Bill G. Again, that's doxatallent.com Bill G. One more time. Doxatallent.com bill G. Check it out today. What does it look like to create a life from somebody who's created a billion dollar company? That's the story of today. That's the story of our show. That's the story we'll tell. Stay tuned. Hello and welcome again to the Scaling Up Business Podcast. I'm your host, Gazelle's business growth coach, Bill Gallagher. On the show with us today is Maria Sipka. Maria is a friend, a business friend, a personal friend and an extraordinary and passionate woman. I can't wait for you all to meet her and hear her story and all of that kind of. Now, Maria created her first company at the age of 19. By 21 it was a $2 million business. And then over the next six years she had 50 properties in her name. She had in fact the perfect life. But she gave it all up and she went in search of something else. She ended up co founding the LinkedIn of Europe, Zing as the COO and co founder there. It's now over a billion dollar valuation company. But she left that too. She came to San Francisco. She's now the co founder of a company called Lynkia. She's the chief evangelist for that business today. It's an extraordinary influence marketing company. We're going to hear her views on life, the adventure and how she's created these things one after another. It's super cool. Welcome to the show, Maria.

Thank you so much, Phil. It's an honor.

Well, let's go back to the beginning as we like to do. And tell us a little bit about this beginning. Tell us about, I don't know, 16, 19 years of age and how you kind of began your entrepreneurial journey.

Well, it actually started with my childhood sweetheart who I was madly in love with. And basically we got to a stage in our relationship a few months into it where he's just like, like, lady, you really need to up your game in terms of personal development and so on. He was a high performance athlete. I'm like, what do you mean by that? And he's like, I'm going to take you to an Anthony Robbins seminar. And I'm like, okay, this is like, this is the experience that will bond our relationship or break it apart. So I ended up at an Anthony Robbins seminar and was absolutely blown away and forever grateful that I did it at the age of 16 and did the whole thing of walking across the hot and walked out a new person. You know, had an entire toolkit of how to actually exist in the world and make decisions and set goals. And one of my goals was to become financially independent. You know, to me, having money at that age or over the course of however many years that I could accumulate some level of wealth meant I could do what I wanted, when I wanted, with who I wanted, it equated to freedom. So at the same time that I set that goal, my parents came to me and said I was about 17, I was working part time in a real estate agency. And they said, you know, one day you're going to get married. And I'm thinking, why are you talking about marriage now? I'm 17 years old, like, sure, I'm in love with this guy, but I have no desire to get married. And they're like, well, hang on, listen, listen. One day you're going to get married and as the parents of the bride, it's additional to pay for your wedding. But you know, that might happen in like 10 years. And who knows when we're going to give you the opportunity to take the money now and invest it. And I'm like, huh, interesting. I'm like, I want to invest it. I was working at that real estate agency. I immediately went to the best agent that I knew and said, listen, I've got $20,000. If you could buy any property, which one would it be? And he outright said, it would be this one. It's got dual income. It positively ge. You know, I learned all the lingo at that stage. And before I knew, I went and bought my first property. And I'm like, okay, good. I'm on my path to financial independence to some degree. At the same time. I finished my. Shortly thereafter, I finished my studies and basically got tapped on the shoulder by the Lowy family. And the Lowy family, basically, you know, what they needed. I'd studied communications. And they're like, you seem to know what you're doing, you know, in terms of, like, new ways of marketing and communication. Can you come in and help us? And before I knew it, I had my first business. I was 19. Shortly into the role, I realized that I was completely out of my depth. And I'm like, all right, I've got to hire somebody. I've got to hire somebody that has had two or three years experience. And that way I'll be able to fulfill on what this client needed me to do, which was the Westworld shopping centers. And I was working with their corporate division. So started a company and then before I knew it, started to build up a customer base, of course, started to get referred. Ended up over the course of the next eight years, accumulating about 100 customers. Within a few years, we were generating a couple of million dollars in revenue. A lot of that was like profit. And my childhood sweetheart, who I was still with at the time, joined me in the business and introduced me to his personal trainer. And over a conversation, his personal trainer tells me that he owns over 100 properties. And I'm like, how does a personal trainer own over 100 properties? How do you even make that a reality? And he shared his formula with me. And I was so taken back because I was completely on the wrong path when it came to investing into real estate. I thought, hey, I'll earn this money. I'll just buy properties outright and have five or 10 properties. He taught me a completely different way. I went home that evening, put a spreadsheet together, and basically by the age of 40, if I followed his formula, I would have a billion dollars worth of property. It outlined exactly how many properties I would buy every year, assuming that the market was growing at a certain clip. So basically, over the of the next eight years, we had accumulated 50 properties using his formula. And that's where everything changed. I was 27. And basically the next stage of the chapter began.

There you are, 27, 50 properties. The perfect life. At that point, or so it looks like it. Still with the boyfriend.

At that point, I was with the boyfriend. I was living in this beautiful waterfront apartment where Russell Crowe was living as well. I literally would wake up to the sounds of the sailing ships just clinkering along. I'd go for a walk to the botanical gardens and sip a cup of coffee, go into the office for a bit. Had joined EO Entrepreneur Organization, had a phenomenal group of friends, a really great relationship with my family. I mean, living in Sydney, life was perfect.

So what happened then? How did. What did you throw it away? Did you move from it? Did you see something else? What was the shift then? Because I know we've got a whole new chapter.

We do. So really it was joining the Entrepreneur organization that blew my entire world open. I went to the Switzerland University, and suddenly I was amongst 400 people that had been on some kind of a journey. Everybody had a story to tell, a phenomenal story to tell. And I remember sitting with one of my fellow EO members from Sydney. We actually went to Rome after the university, and I was so deeply moved by all the conversations and the possibilities, and I said, you know, I really want to go in search of what my purpose is. I want to live in Europe. I want to completely go on this journey of. Of discovery. And, you know, I cannot fathom going back home and then for the next 10, 20, 30 years doing more of what I've just done over the last eight years. You know, I put money first and foremost, financial independence. I don't want to climb that mountain anymore. You know, I want to discover, like, what is my purpose in this world. I love entrepreneurship, but how can I invest into something that's actually going to create a new, meaningful impact to people in the world? You know? And that's a journey. I need to go on that journey. So I came back. I came back from that university. I remember, you know, my childhood sweetheart was, you know, in the bathroom, and I sort of knocked on the door and I said, you know, darling, we need to transform our relationship. I love you so deeply, and you have had such a profound effect on my life. And, you know, he was going down a spiritual path and meditating, and I'm like, I'm being pulled to go down a completely different path, and it doesn't make sense for me to join yours, and it doesn't make sense for you to join mine. And so I left. I wound my business down, and I traveled around the world for two years, and I really leveraged the Entrepreneur organization as a hub. I would go to every university, GLC local event, regional event, wherever it was that I was traveling. And I was just absolutely fascinated to hear hundreds of stories from entrepreneurs and also just to meet grassroots local people in places like India and China and all over Europe and America. It was like, you know, if you're going to go in search of your purpose, then you've got to sort of figure out, like, what. What makes the world tick. Like, it's not a subset of a population that lives in Sydney. There's a whole world that's out there. And so that journey was phenomenal.

So did you create a purpose statement at that point or how did you do that?

No, I didn't have a purpose. When I went, I went in search of my purpose. And so first and foremost I had to really discover who I was. I felt like I was wrapped up in cotton. You know, I had a very inspiring and dominant mother and father that helped guide me. My boyfriend at the time was beyond anything that I had ever imagined. You know, he like read a thousand books and taught me everything that he knew and took me to every personal development course. So I felt like I needed to just be the fish out of water and truly connect with, you know, who I was. One of the first things I did was attend day silent retreat. And the 10 day silent retreat was necessary. You've got to remember when I was 16, I walked across hot coals and said, right, I'm going to be financially independent. It's like that didn't work for me anymore, right.

I needed to just go for it, declare a big thing. Being completely goal oriented was no longer sufficient and just confronting fears was no longer the thing it was.

I felt like I was an engine that was well oiled and I needed a new framework to operate within. Essentially what I did, I did a couple of things. First, I completely surrendered to this notion of synchronicity and serendipity. I bet every single one of you that are listening have had these moments with people or circumstances have come into your life and it's completely changed the course of your life. That really became my guiding light was that, that surrendering. In order to surrender, you know, I needed to go and do this silent retreat because we're so distracted day to day with everything around us, we never really get a sense of who we are. And so I went deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep. It was an incredible experience. And I actually arrived at a point of nothingness. Really the whole point of doing it is you arrive at a point, point where you just feel the vibrations. And so you know, that, that, that experience became my metaphor. It's this notion of like you can go on this journey where you don't actually know where you're heading and have the courage to do it. And no matter what, what, what, what you experience along the way, whether it's loneliness or fear or anxiety or pure joy, it's okay to experience that. So that, that was the first experience that set the metaphor. That has really become an experience that I've drawn on every single day for the following 15 years. The second thing I did was this notion of, like, what's your story? Who are you? How do you want people to describe who you are?

Right.

If you're going to go out on this journey, people are going to want to get a sense. And I didn't want my story to be like, oh, I'm an entrepreneur from Australia that did this and, and this and this. You know, I wanted a new story. And so the way that I looked at life was, you know what? One day I'm going to be on my deathbed and I'm going to look back and really look back and go, okay, what if your life was a storybook and every year of your life was a chapter of that book, you know, and tie that in with this notion of surrendering to synchronicity and serendipity, what would unfold? Let me try it on. So, you know, the first year was the year of peace. And that's where I did the ten day silent retreat. That's where I read books on Zen Buddhism. I went and lived in the rainforest, you know, with, for a short period of time with a dear friend, Jochen Ginsburg, and his family. The next year was the year of adventure, you know, where I went traveling. I was not in one spot for more than four days. The next year was the year of living. And that's where, you know, moving to a new country and experiencing a new language and learning how to create, in the meantime, being in search of this purpose. So that became my modus. And I've been setting those themes every single year for 15 years. My storybook is like half complete or a third complete, depending on how long I'm going to live.

So what did you see for your deathbed, for the end of it? Is it to live an invented life or what, in your words, is it?

So what I wanted to see was that one, first and foremost, in the earlier part of the journey, I got a real good sense of like, who am I? What am I passionate about? And like most of us, especially being an entrepreneur, this deep, deep, deep passion for other people and coming up with a solution to solve some kind of a problem or uncover opportunities. I wanted that to be around this notion of storytelling. Storytelling is everything. It has been for thousands of years, even going back to the days of the Aborigines. So I'm like, you know, how can I leave a legacy around storytelling enabling people's voices to be heard in some way? And the third element was, you know, how can we address something that's so fundamentally wrong in society and Find a solution to fix it, right? And to me, that was the world of advertising. You know, if you have a look at 7 billion people live on the planet, you know, we are all influenced by media and up until that point in time, the amount of money that has been wasted in creating messages and experiences, right?

It was.

It's what's wrong in our society today. And so, you know, I said I set out on a mission to change that, to solve for that. And that was part of my story when I look back on, you know, on my debt, on my deathbed.

So before you continue that, I have, I just want to come alongside what you said and underscore it. I've used this exercise of the deathbed, or not so much the deathbed, but what happens at your funeral, your memorial service? What do people say about you as an access to discovering one's personal purpose? And I think it's really powerful. Imagine your funeral, your memorial service, and everybody who loved you and knew you and cared about you is gathered around and now they're going to say things about you. That's a very powerful thing, because what you want them to say about you starts to give insight to the core of your why, the why of your life and the thing that you care about. Then if you look back at what you come up with there, some of the things that you're proudest of and what you're most moved by, it'll be iterations of that. The only thing to modify, though, is that some people, this is a little too confronting, a little too morose for them to think about dying, even though for the most part, we're all going to die, so far as we know, every last one is going to die. Now, my son and some future historian folks think that we're on the verge of living forever. And you may have religious notions of a next life or like that, but. But for the most part, so far as we know, in practical terms, nobody gets out alive. So if that's the case, what's your story? What is the purpose of this life then can be revealed in imagining what you'd like said about you at that. But if that's a problem for you, then just imagine your retirement party. So as late in life as possible, that celebration of your life, your accomplishments, what would you like other people to say? What would you like to be able to say about yourself in that situation along the way? I think what you discover is the thing that you'd like to be able to say to yourself right now in the mirror. So When I just thought about it, I imagined my friends and family and coworkers and everybody who'd survived me gathering around. And I just, you know, I know that people gather around, they say nice things and then they go have lunch and life goes on for the people who remain. But. And so there's a kind of an absurdity to it. And really all I wanted them to be able to say is that I was someone who made a difference for people, that I lived a life of contribution. Right. That my life was in service of something bigger than myself. And when I look at all the things that I'm proud of now, from this moment to the next, it's those moments where I was a contribution, where I shared myself, where I gave of something, right?

Absolutely.

I think when you have that purpose, then the stories that you create for yourself, that you imagine, they have the right motivation, that character has this motivation, her motivation. They know what they're doing in that story and what you're creating there. Right. It's not, it's not truly random. It has a backbone.

It's not random at all. And I think the more that you can simple simplify that as you've just simplified it, then that becomes your guiding light. And it's not about having an elaborate. Like the notion of having annual themes is the romanticism in it. You know, think about when you read a fairy tale. I've got a four year old and a six year old and one of the greatest joys we have, like most parents, is reading books to them and just the sense of wonderment and then bonding experience that you have together. And so the notion of having the chapters is more to enrich the journey. Right. And we all need a journey. You know, all of us are here to serve and we're only as valuable as the experiences that we've had, the stories that we can share, how we show up and listen and the network that we've built. You know, all of the people that we've met along the way, every single person you meet, you really get a sense of who that person is and you know, what, what their vision is, what they care about. How incredibly valuable is that as part of your toolkit to impact others? Right. And so the storybook is a container for you to go on a journey. The vision and the goal setting is like the tools that you need to be effective. Right. But you know, going back to your question around being, you know, either on your deathbed or having some, some kind of a celebration, you know, for me it's very Similar to you. Like, I want to be known as somebody that catalyzed others. The word catalyst, as opposed to being a leader, is something that I adopted about again at an EO event. It was through the Starfish and the Spider, the book written by Ori Brafman and Rod Beckstrom. And they talk about, how do you show up in the world? And hands down, a catalyst is an incredibly inspiring way to show up, because what it means to be a catalyst is to inspire others to take action. You're not telling people what to do, you're inspiring them to mobilise them. And so once you lock in on how you want to show up in the world, then everything else just falls into place. Right? The relationships that you build, the businesses that you build, the. The organizations that you join, the books and the podcasts that you read, all come into, you know, this notion of being this bright light that can truly impact others.

Have you. Have you read the Surrender Experiment?

I've started to read it and you're probably the fifth person that's mentioned that book in the last two months.

Well, it does sound like you're talking about a very similar concept. Right. And it's nice to connect these things because we've had. Including John Ratliff on talking about the Surrender Experiment and his. I'm just blanking the other book right now, but the other book as well, it's a powerful story of what's happening when you sort of open yourself up to what might show up in the world. But in your case, and there's also an opportunity to actually create something, to imagine something and invent something and then see those things show up for what you're sort of dreaming and imagining. And the other thing, you didn't really say, but when you create your annual story, I imagine sometimes you're in a high and sometimes you're in a low, sometimes you're dealing with a crisis. It's not all like watercolors and painted pictures and, you know, I don't know, glitter and sunshine and rainbows. Right.

Well, you know, so. So when I first used to come up with the theme, I'd always do it at midnight, New Year's, and I'd start to think about it and ponder over it. And I really wanted it to be an intuitive process. Right. Like, some of the themes have been, as I mentioned, the year of peace, the year of living, the year of adventure. But there were years of perseverance, taking things to the next level. There were Year of New Beginnings, you know, where our daughter was Born every single chapter. I can tell you a series of stories around and that becomes, you know, incredibly powerful. But a couple of years ago, I went to Burning man and really wanted to experience this phenomenon, this community, and how that would impact, you know, how I showed up in the world, like really taking things to the next level. And so when it actually came time, you know, to setting the theme for this year, I worked with a coach three months before midnight. And. And I wanted to be, you know, a lot more deliberate and intentional because what I worked, what I walked away from by experiencing Burning man is this notion of hyper generosity, right? Like, generosity is one of the most beautiful traits that somebody can have. Generous in spirit and nature. And I'm like, you know, well, what, what would the year of generosity look like? And I'm like, I need to be a little bit more focused about it. So I started working with a coach and setting a series of metaphors. And what I realized by working with a coach was, you know, for me, generosity means being able to unleash a phenomenal amount of energy, you know, in a certain way. Because I, I came to San Francisco six years ago with a six week old baby to launch a technology company, like completely again. Walking like, you know, alone and blind in some way. And you know, the last, I would say, five years prior to setting this theme, I was literally Rapunzel in the ivory tower with a headset and just trying to be build the customer base in lightning speed. It was beyond anything I've ever done in my life. One of the most grueling five years of my life. Having a second child in the process and building this company in a very high stakes environment. And I again got to a point where I felt like all of this, you know, what you have to give and what I have to give is positive energy, right? Like it's a gift to be able to manifest that energy and to be able to give it to others. And being locked up in the ivory tower just wasn't working for me. And so I was working with this coach and I'm like, you know, I feel like an elastic band that's just being pulled back and back and back and back. And I said, I want to let it go, right? I don't want to let it go like a mad woman. But I just imagine this slow motion video that's just like, like letting go and starting to like unleash. And I'm like, that's it, that's it. This year is going to be the year of unleashing. But we took it a step further and this is, you know, for the first time in 15 years I've done this because I was actually moving away from goal setting and visioning in a very rigid way. And that being my only methodology. Right framework. I'm like, no, no, I want to quantify what unleashing means. You know, I've always wanted to have a seat at some table to be able to give back and contribute. And I feel like I can do that now on so many different levels. And I said, all right, well what unleashing means and this notion of hyper generosity is that, you know, I'm on a mission to identify and work with 100 change agents around the world. They could be at the beginning, embryonic stages of their journey. They could be middle way through because what change agents. And they could be entrepreneurs, they could be professors, philosophers, you know, just somebody that has an idea that's going to create significant impact in the world and not line just their own pockets. Right. It's for a high purpose. They're the people that I want to spend the next five years with. And so, you know, this notion of unleashing got tied to, to this quest of spending 25% of my time working with 100 change agents from all different walks of life. Now that year of unleashing, we're like how many months into it? Nine months into it and I'm already working with 25 change agents. And it has been the most transformational experience I've ever had in my life and starts to really transcend from this. Like I'm an entrepreneur building a company, building value for, for the shareholders and the ecosystem to like, wow. I'm now taking all of these skills and these experiences and insights and working with these change agents on helping them unleash their ideas onto the audiences that they need to mobilize. And that's where this whole thing setting becomes extraordinarily powerful. Takes it to a brand new level.

Well, let's talk about your daily code for a minute to begin to close the the show. And why don't you share folks, the give code that you use as kind of a daily. I don't know if you call it a mantra or whatever it is, but the way that you reflect and do that, share us that.

Yeah. So about six months ago, I started working with a woman, Joanna Blore. And funny enough, we're both extremely passionate about this notion of storytelling and what's your story? And I'm like, I really want to work with you to understand like what, what's my story, right? As I. As I transcend into. In terms of having a seat at the table, what does that story look like? Exercise. Over the course of four sessions, we're down to, you know, like, what can you teach? Like, what is fundamentally, like, you and part of your DNA. Like, what has got you this point over the last 42 years of your life? What's got you to this point?

Joanna's, by the way, is a past guest, so if you want to hear more about Joanna, you'll go find Joanna's show on our podcast as well. So you can get a little taste of Joanna.

Yeah, she's amazing. And. And so by walking through the story, what we ended up identifying were four attributes that one needs to have in order to really be the rocket fuel for whatever their vision is for. However, they show up day to day, right. And really make things happen. So what the Give code is about, you know, G stands for generosity, which is what was spoken about earlier, having this filter of just as soon as you meet someone. It's not a transaction. We're so programmed to think in a transactional way. It's more like, help me understand, understand what I can give here. Can I make a connection? Can I share an insight or a story? Like, what can I do? Right? And who are you? So I can then plug you somehow into this greater ecosystem. So coming from this generous nature is first and foremost, you know, I stands for seeing the world as infinite. It is. I'm a huge fan of, like, Edward de Bono that, like, thinks creative thinking and thinking, like, without any restrictions and going crazy. But, you know, seeing the world from infinite rather than scarcity is also incredibly rewarding. That's where you really uncover the opportunities. V stands for vulnerability. So, you know, sometimes through the stories that you share and how you show up, people can make an interpretation of, like, oh, you're so perfect, right? Which none of us are by any means. And, you know, I remember I did a podcast once, and, you know, this. This woman who was driving in a car in Ireland, stopped the car, listened to the podcast, sent me a LinkedIn message, and within a week, we were having a drink in San Francisco at a bar called Amelie, and we spent like three hours together. And subsequently we started spent a whole lot more time together. And it wasn't until about six months into the relationship, you know, our friendship, we're on a phone call, and I was really upset about something, which I very rarely am, and I started crying. And for her, it was like a moment of like, oh, my God, you're really human. It's like. And she had the opportunity to actually help me. And, you know, it's not to say that we always, you know, we're our heart on ourselves sleeve and so on. It's just like, you know, sob and tell sob stories. But like, that's when our relationship changed. And the most profound part of it was she's like, honestly, knowing you, Maria was setting this unrealistic expectation of who I needed to be and it was really stressing me out. So when, you know, when I heard what was upsetting you and you actually released and I was able to help you, it brought me so much closer to you. And it was such a wake up call. Right. So vulnerability is what makes us human and forms those deeper connections. And then E stands for energy. How are you manifesting your energy when you walk into a room and people don't know you or know you? On a scale of 1 to 10, where are they going to peg your energy? Is it at a 2, a 5 or a 10 without you even opening your mouth? Right. Like, energy is so incredibly powerful. And so how this gift code is what every single day I use as a mechanism to hold me to account in how I show up to myself and how I show up to others. And that is what's got me to this point. All the highs and lows.

Yep, brilliant. We've got a full show giving people a lot of things to think about, challenge their approaches, stimulate them, have them in. So hopefully it's been valuable. If you'd like to learn more, more about influence marketing and some of the lessons. There's just a ton of great content on the Lynkia website, Qia. So L I N Q I a dot com and we'll put that in the show notes as well so you can read more about the work that Linke does and what they've learned about influence marketing and being influential. And they're a B2C. You can learn about the company too, but. But there's a ton of great resources there for you. Thanks so much for being on the show. I want to remind our listeners that we bring a new show every week with thought leaders and entrepreneurs and other coaches and authors and so on, on everything to do with scaling up the entrepreneurial journey and not so much the startup, not the big company stuff, but the journey of growing the business. So that's our world. We bring a new show to you every week also on our website if you'd like to get started scaling up your team. We've got an introduction to Scaling up as well as an outline of how to run quarterly planning sessions with your team. Not your personal planning so much, but your team planning agendas, worksheets, things like that so that you can begin to do this work with your company, getting your company going. So hopefully that's helpful. You'll find that at scaling up business.com you'll find the podcast wherever you get your podcasts at. And thanks again so much. Thanks to Maria for joining us and we'll see you next week. Are you ready to turn your goals into daily wins? You should check out our Scoreboard software. Powered by Align, it's the official software for Scaling up. With Scoreboard, you'll get an AI driven coach for priorities and KPIs and it'll help keep your team focused on what matters most. With Align, you can track your goals in real time and you'll even see results on the go. With their mobile app, you can rest easy knowing that Align has world class onboarding and support to set your team up for success. This is really more than just software, it's what I actually use to manage growth in our Scaling up client teams. Unlock clarity and results with Scoreboard by Aligned. To try it now, go to aligntoday.com Bill G One more time aligntoday.com Bill G that's aligntoday.com Bill G Check it out and try it now.