Self-Awareness and Courage for Alex

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We're talking today about what makes you a more inspiring leader. So once you've started to express your vision in the world and share what lights you up, then the next thing that really makes a difference is to have a little range of emotional expression. In so much of business and maybe lots of society, we're taught to sort of, and especially for the men listening, watching, we're taught to kind of keep the emotions in check and not be so expressive. But we care deeply about things and there's a lot of power in that and it engages people and it lights people, but it has people want to work, work with you, for you, around you, partner with you, buy from you, like that kind of thing. So if you're willing to start to look to bring some self awareness, how do you feel right now?

It could be good or bad.

You could be feeling really heartbroken, you could be feeling discouraged.

Right.

Whatever. It is like getting in touch with your own kind of feelings and then being able to express them out in the world. Take strength, take, encourage.

Even if you're having a bad day.

Sharing unreservedly about how you're feeling can be very powerful, especially if you leave them with something like your stand in the matter. So I was coaching a guy a few years ago, Alex, and he had a setback. At some point he didn't even really notice. And a couple weeks went by and he started to get in a funk. And then he came to our next coaching session and he was like, bill, I think that maybe it's time for me to end this, that I think.

I'm not the right CEO for this company.

Maybe this isn't the company for me. He was ready to quit and there was a dramatic change from when I'd seen him just a few weeks prior. And so I started to look with him at what had gone on. And what happened is that he just had a setback on a project or something he was working on.

And.

And then in a subtle way, he started to decide that this wasn't for him, it wasn't going to turn out. And not all these thoughts were conscious. Right. You know what? It's like that voice in your head that's not always on your side that's filling you with fear and doubt, like, oh, maybe this isn't going to go well. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut, or maybe I should stay home. Maybe I should have stayed in bed today. That little sort of negative voice that we all have very often started playing out for him. So some of the thoughts were conscious, some were unconscious. But after a couple weeks, he. He started to get really discouraged and want to exit his business and let somebody else take it over. Obviously, you can't lead strongly from that. After conversation with me, he realized what had happened and what he decided. And then we rehearsed a little bit of how he was going to talk to his team about it. But all he had to do was go back to his team and said, hey, guys, I don't know if you noticed this, but I've kind of been in a funk and I didn't really know, but I had my coaching session and I realized that I had this setback. And then I started to get discouraged and I kept it a secret, and that sort of made it worse. And anyway, I just want you to know that I'm not giving up. And I am going to be bold and creative and unleashed. And even in spite of that setback. And he in fact, tackled the problem from another angle and found a great solution is people really loved his sharing the struggle. Because, listen, we all go through struggles and you're human just like everybody else. And if you'd actually let a little room for your own humanity and be open about it, but also leave people with your stand, your power, your conviction, your commitment, then they'd also have room for their own humanity and rise above their own challenges. So open up, share with them how you're feeling, but then really take them all the way through it to the victory on the other side and then go to work on it. You don't have to have it finished.

Or handled yet, but really it could make a big difference because we all go through it.

No matter what level of leader you.

Are, you all go through moments of doubt, of setbacks, of that kind of thing. A big range of emotions and it's appropriate for all of us.

I hope it's been helpful for you. I think it's made a difference for me and our clients over the years. My name is Bill Gallagher, Scaling Coach.

And host of this Scaling Up Business podcast. We bring our show to you once or twice a week and with everything that you might want to deal with and improve the people, the strategy, the execution, the cash and the leadership that.

Takes your company from where it is.

Today to where you'd really like it to go.

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