Whitney O’Halek on Working Out Anywhere, Motherhood, and Healing Through Grief

Hey everybody, I'm Amy from BodyFit by Amy, and welcome to the Be Where You Are Today podcast. We often are connecting with professionals in the health and fitness and nutrition space so we can help you wherever you are in your journey, but we also like to speak to other professionals and people in our own community, and that is what we are doing today. Today I am joined by Whitney O'Halleck. Whitney is a longtime BodyFitter, a good friend of mine, has been a personal client of mine, and is a member of our BodyFit Athletic Club. She is also a travel writer, an author of 9 books, entrepreneur, master packer— I need to learn from you— runner, heavy lifter, and dessert enthusiast. Me too. She and her 19-month-old daughter Iris, who is the cutest. I love her. Travel around the world together and work out together. And Iris is also a weighted vest, so really good for workouts, and they only get bigger, by the way. Whitney's accent is from Tennessee, which I love. Feels like home. I'm from Virginia, but she's lived in the DC area for 2 decades, and her website, quickwittravel.com, is a massive resource for all things travel. And she has a new website, Half schoolpassport.com that focuses specifically on single parent travel. Welcome to the podcast, Whitney!

Thank you so much for having me. I've been really looking forward to this.

I'm really excited to talk about travel and to just talk about your journey through fitness because I feel like it's been through a lot of different stages, and I think that's really relatable to a lot of people. And it's one of the things that I want to highlight here on the podcast too. We can talk nutrition, we can talk fitness, but I feel like relating those to our real lives and the things that we go through is really important. So thanks for being here.

Thank you for having me. Thanks.

All right, so let's start. You are a travel writer, and I would love to hear just the origin story of that. How did you get into travel writing?

So I have always wanted to be a writer, ever since I think I probably learned how to read. I wanted to write books, and I have always been interested in travel, always been interested in other cultures. But when I was younger, I just thought that wasn't for me. Like, I'm from a very small town in Tennessee. I didn't know anybody who really traveled like I travel now. But I had an opportunity to live in Japan and teach English for a summer while I was in college. I was 20. And it just totally gave me the travel bug. I basically— my friends like to tease me that I basically went to Japan and never unpacked.

I love that. Yeah.

So I, I started writing emails home. That was like my original blog in 2006. And I just loved every minute of it. Like it was life-giving. It gave me so much confidence. I was a little bit running away from a bad breakup.

Yeah. Sometimes that's the best things come from that.

Yeah, I know. Right. Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.

Yes.

It just totally created the person that I am today. Actually, this kimono right behind me is from that trip. Oh, I— yeah, still permeates my life.

Yes.

So that was really how I became a travel writer was just writing these emails home. And then I started a blog, Quick Wit Travel, and just, I wanted to help people understand that they can do this too. If I can do this, you can do this. And the whole time I was in Japan, and pretty much anytime I do anything difficult these days, I remind myself that people dumber than me do this every day.

That's what I say about parenting.

Yep. That little bit of wisdom has gotten me through a lot.

Oh, I love that. And I feel like especially with travel, I relate so much to that because I also grew up in a tiny town of Virginia where it just wasn't common to hear about people like taking trips to Europe or even like getting on airplanes or things like that. And it does feel a little unattainable, or just this mystery of how would I actually do that? And as someone who like— I'm a big overpacker, I'm not really good at like itineraries, things like that.

That's where I have some resources.

Yes, you do. Yes, that is— thankfully I have a producer husband, but I feel like just knowing like how many of us are like, I want to go to Japan, but I would have no idea where to start, or what to see. And I feel like that's what you've done so well, is do it, but also do it like on a budget. Do it in a way— you recently in the last year and a half have done it with Iris, with a baby. Like, never in a million years would I think about traveling, like going to all these fun places with a baby, and you've done it so well. So I think it's like such a great resource for, for parents and single parents, and also just those of us that are a little apprehensive getting out there and traveling, especially with our kids. Yeah. So within that, I would love to hear about your, like, fitness journey of how— I know you've been a runner in the past, and I know a little bit about your story, but of how you started in fitness and how it's evolved. And then obviously, how do you work that into your travel schedule?

So that's the trick, right? I never— much like with travel, never thought it was for me. I never thought of myself as athletic. I didn't play sports. I was in the band. I just, I didn't know how to work out. I didn't know that was something that people did for fun unless you played a sport. Like, why would you work out? And I, so also, just like in this, I had an eating disorder from the time that I was 5 until the time I was 27, so for 22 years. And so I did not have a healthy relationship with food. I did not have a healthy relationship with working out. I started working out in high school, my senior year of high school, and did a very restrictive dieting, lost 60 pounds. Everybody thought I looked so amazing. And so I— it was really unhealthy, but at the same time, like, that's where I got the bug for exercise because it did make me feel good. Like, I didn't have a great relationship with it, but it also— I definitely saw the benefits of not the weight loss or the muscle tone, but like the endorphins, the better outlook, that kind of thing. So all things work together, right? So even the bad stuff, there's some good things that come from learning those lessons. So in college, I finally started getting help for my eating disorder, and I think that was spring 2007. And I had this group of friends. So I went to an engineering school and I was a writer.

I love it.

So like They, they told me that I was an honorary engineer, that I was a syntactic engineer because I could put sentences together. I love it. And so we started rock climbing and hiking, and just this group of friends that I had was so healthy for me. And I had shut out like relationships, like I had that bad breakup that I mentioned. In this summer, I took this giant adventure to Japan, and then I come back and I'm like I need to get my life. Yeah. And I just discovered this love of hiking. The strength that I got from rock climbing was epic. Talk about a confidence builder.

Oh my gosh.

I— and I would only do it with my engineering friends because they knew how to do all the ropes and stuff, right? Super safe. But that was really the start to my healthy relationship with exercise. And so I started— so I moved to DC after college because there were no jobs in Tennessee. It was the bottom of the recession. And so I was looking for a job up here, started running because you need an outlet for things and started to really fall in love with running. And so I would run like 4 miles a day, about 6 days a week, and I got injured a lot. So here again with the unhealthy relationship, right? Yeah, with exercise. But so like I was having these hip injuries and knee injuries and I'm like, I'm 24, like, why is this all falling apart? And it was because I wasn't cross-training, you know?

I was like, I can tell you why. I can tell you.

Yeah, you can. Yep. So I stopped running for a while, went through some times of depression. There were job issues and just all the things in your 20s that are such a big deal, living on your own, like away from family, like trying to pay rent and all the things. And I was still traveling as much as I could here, again with the budget travel. Yeah. And I went to Prague, Czech Republic, to meet up with some friends who are going to be running the Prague Marathon. I was not going to be running the Prague Marathon, but I wanted to go to Prague, so I went and met up with them. And that is where I met my husband. Oh, and we met because of the Prague Marathon in 2012. He was running it for his 40th birthday. And so I met him like 2 days after he turned 40 and I was 26, I think. And we basically started talking and never stopped.

Yeah.

And after that, it wasn't just him. Like, we, we didn't start dating right off the bat. It was still several months before our first date. But I was like, being in the atmosphere of the marathon, I was like, This is awesome. There's such an energy to this. I want this. I want to start running again. So I started running again, got injured a lot, talked to Steve about it. That's my husband. And we started dating in the fall of 2012, went for a lot of long walks, which is also exercise, of course.

Yes.

And we got married in 2014 and started working out together in the mornings. And that's really my sweet spot, is to be a morning person and work out in the mornings. And so for us to do that together, we really inspired each other. Like, neither one of us made the other one do it, but like, we wanted to do it together. Yeah, we did that throughout our marriage, which I loved. I thought that was unique about us. Like, a lot of couples can't work out together. Didn't do the same workout, but working out in parallel was nice. And running together, like, all the things, it was just extra together time as like a common hobby, and I really loved that about us.

Yeah. So when did you start your strength training journey?

I started strength training, I guess, 2015. I wanted to stop getting injured with running, and so my husband and I joined a gym that was right across the street, and it was fabulous. It was Crunch, and we loved it. It was close, it was convenient, it was really affordable, but they closed closed in 2021, in December of 2021. Like, they didn't even give January 2022 a chance. And so we were super bummed. And so we started using our condo gym, which is super tiny, but we made it work. And so I saw a trainer when we were going to the gym like once a week for years, and I was in probably the best shape of my life, was not getting injured anymore, and also had the socialization of that. And so when the gym closed for COVID and then closed for good. I was like, I didn't have that anymore either. And so I'm like, I've got to find something like that feels like I'm working out with a friend. And so several of my friends who also work out were like, oh, you should try BodyFit by Amy. It's on YouTube. It's totally free. I was like, I'll give it a try. And I had tried several apps. I think I had written about all of them for the blog. Yeah. And Amy, like, hands down, BodyFit by— I'm not just saying this because I'm on the podcast. Honestly, I felt like I was working out with a friend. It was different every day, which I loved. I hate repeating stuff. And it was so much variety, like the kickboxing and the strength training and the cardio and the especially the mobility work. That was all the stuff that I really needed to balance out my running.

Yeah.

And so I've been with Amy Schemper since 2022.

Yeah. And you joined the BodyFit Athletic Club, I think, pretty quickly too.

Pretty quickly after that, when y'all started the app, that was the thing that pushed me over the edge. I was like, okay, she's got an app. I don't have to watch the YouTube ads anymore. I can just use the app. Yay! Yeah, I love the app. I love so many things about the app.

Ah, thank you, we do too. And also I will say when— because people have said that a few times— if I feel like I'm working out with a friend, that is like the highest compliment because that's what I want it to feel like. It's just you and me just working out. And that thing that we love about gyms or like group fitness of like feeling that community feel, I think that's also what we have in the BodyFit Athletic Club too. If you're talking to people who are doing the similar workouts or the same workouts or in the a similar life phase as you and connecting in that way. So that's awesome. I also love this part of your journey, just going back to what you said in the beginning about how you lost a lot of weight and people do that thing that they do, which is well-meaning, but of, oh, you look so great, which I think is a common response with weight loss. The alternative is, oh, what about before? Or it is— I feel like so many of us, we grew up in a time of diet culture, and we learned exercise as a means to an end. I feel like so many people have the story of, that's all I've ever known is exercise was to be skinny, to look a certain way, to not be flabby, to whatever it is. And I love that sort of while you're saying you didn't have a great relationship with food or exercise, you also caught the bug of, oh, it actually makes me feel really good. And I think that is more rare. Sometimes people get that way later in life after they've really had not a great relationship with exercise or strength training or cardio or whatever it is. So I love that, that those two things can coexist and you can come out on the other side of knowing, hey, not only is this good for my body in a lot of different ways beyond just how I look, but I actually feel really good. And I also think being a runner— and I was in the same boat, I loved running, I don't do it that much anymore— but Also got injuries when I wasn't doing enough strength training or cross-training. But you think, oh, I'm not going to get that same— this is— there's a reason why it's called the runner's high, right? The adrenaline. I'm not going to get that from strength training. I'm not going to get that from a video. And you absolutely can. I think of this every time I do a kettlebell swing and I'm like out of breath and I'm like feeling— I'm like, oh yeah, that you can get that runner's high. So I love that that was a part of your journey of realizing early on that it made feel good, and things like hiking with friends, the community aspect, things like rock climbing, the confidence aspect. Those things are all— have all been such a part of your journey. So thank you for sharing that with us. Yeah, back to travel, because this is what you do the most of. Tell me how you're able to make working out— I will tell you, Whitney is very consistent in her workouts because we talk, and because you're in the BAC, and because you're commenting and posting and things like that. How do you make that work with your busy travel schedule?

Amy, I'm here to tell you I take you with me wherever I go.

Yay! I love it. I wish I really could go all the places you go.

You can. You're welcome to come. I always need an extra set of hands. But yeah, I love the app. I love that I can download videos. So because you don't always have great Wi-Fi, believe it or not, right, or places without great Wi-Fi in the world, and I go to a lot of them. Yeah. But yeah, I can download workouts. I love the calendar where I can go through all of my playlists and say, okay, I know I'm gonna be exhausted from travel this day. I know the next morning I'm gonna need to do a mobility workout. Let's do one that I love, put it in the calendar. All I have to do the next morning is push play. Yeah. And you're doing all the work for me. I'm just showing up.

I love it. That's all you gotta do.

Just keep moving.

Yes.

So that's really the key to my consistency. But I also take resistance bands if I know that there's not a gym or the gym at the hotel or whatever only has a treadmill or something. I take resistance bands. Amy has lots of resistance band workouts. I also use steps and benches however I can. I was just in Spain for a month and the downstairs neighbor had an issue with me working out at 7 AM. I told Amy about this.

Come on, it's not even that early.

I had a friend come to visit and she watched Iris and I went outside and did my workout and found a lovely concrete bench that I did box jumps up on, all the stuff. But I try to use stairs wherever I go. If there's a bench, I love— there was this one time, I think, I think in Hawaii somewhere, we were at this condo, a VRBO type situation, and they didn't have a gym, but they had this fabulous oceanfront lawn with like squishy grass and palm trees. And so I used the palm trees like an obstacle course. I did some cardio and— I love it. Oh, it just was— I love getting creative with my workouts and travel forces me to do that. Like it allows me to do that and it forces me to do that. Just like fitting it in however I can. It's just how I do it. My one non-negotiable is that it has to be a morning workout because that is how my body knows it's time to be awake. Yeah, helps me get over the jet lag. It lets other things not get in the way because you put it off and put it off and then all of a sudden it's bedtime. So for me, that's really the key, is like having that non-negotiable morning workout and having resources. So like bands take up zero space, and weigh nothing. Yep. The app makes it so easy to just push play and go. And there are so many bodyweight workouts, so many resistance band workouts. You're doing more stuff with a bench and a step-up lately. And so I'm loving that. Yeah. So yeah, that's how I make it work when I travel. And also walking is exercise.

Totally.

So you just find a way and make it work.

Yeah, I think those are such good tips. One, yeah, just to have— having an app that you can download, resistance bands take up no space, bodyweight, all of that. But I think also we forget of realizing that like movement is movement. Yes, I'm gonna tell you that you need to be doing this type of strength training and you need to make sure you're getting in your different heart rate zones and all of that. But when you're traveling, like, there are so many ways to move and also get out there and see the sights. Yeah, I don't necessarily do all the travel that you do, but when I— we are traveling, I do like to be like, let's get outside, let's take a walk, let's do a hike. Like, all of that. Getting creative is key. And realizing that, like you said, walking is a workout, running around palm trees is a workout, carrying your baby as a weighted vest is certainly a workout.

Yeah.

So I love that reminder of you can find ways to move wherever you are. It just, it might look different, and that's okay.

Yeah.

Do you have any favorite places that you've gotten workouts in? Because this is one of the things I love about having you in the club, is when you post post a picture and you're like, got my workout in, here's the ocean, and somewhere I've never been and want to go.

Yeah, so some of my best workouts have been— let me think— so on the Nile. Oh, on a Nile cruise ship called a Dahabeya, there was not a gym. And so my husband and I, the first time we went, would just go up on the upper deck and just work out with the view of the Nile. It was pretty epic, like watching the sunrise over the Nile. And getting my bodyweight squats in.

Oh, I love it.

And hiking Mount Sinai was an epic workout. Yeah, it was just amazing. Loved it. And that was actually 6 months postpartum for me. That was my 6-month postpartum goal, was to hike Mount Sinai with my daughter attached to me up and down.

And I did it.

Um, Hawaii is always a winner. Like, you can't get a bad view in Hawaii. I love working out with a view. Running in Sydney, probably one of my favorite places to run is in Sydney because you've got the Sydney Opera House, you've got the Sydney Tower, you've got the bridge, the Sydney Harbour Bridge, and oh, it's just, it's so beautiful and so iconic right there by the water. That's probably one of my favorite places to run is Sydney. All over the world are— there's good workouts all over the world.

Yes.

Yeah.

Oh, Sydney is definitely on the list for me. Awesome. Make sure that you follow Quick Wit Travel on Instagram to see all of these fun places as well. We'll make sure that we put all of your information also in the, in the notes, in the description. But speaking of your adorable weighted vest, I would love to talk a little bit about your journey to motherhood and how fitness has played into that. You were married for many years before having Iris, and I think a lot of women relate to this, just general fears on everything your body goes through with, or not necessarily fears, but anxieties or worries or stresses. So I would love to hear about your journey to motherhood.

Unexpected is the word.

Okay, I love it.

Yeah, my husband and I were married 10 years before I had Iris, and I was very surprised and shocked to find out that I was pregnant, but that happened. And I, you were one of the first people I told because you had known about my fears of being pregnant and childbirth. And I went, I think I came to you like 2 months in and I was like, Amy, I'm so winded. Yes.

I was so different.

This can't be like, yes. Like I cannot catch my breath. And you were like, we can work on it, but that's just how it is in pregnancy.

It is. Your body is working double time.

Your body's working really hard. It's hard because you're working hard, right? Yes.

Yes. That's what we would say.

And you were with me the whole journey. That was when we worked together one-on-one. And that was incredibly helpful to me just for the, am I doing this right? Am I formed right on this when my belly is this big? Is, is this a normal thing that happens? Fitness related or not in pregnancy? So you were the essential resource for me throughout my pregnancy. If you didn't already know that, now you know for sure. And I just tried to stay consistent with you and you really helped me with that. Like you reassured me like, no, you can do the things that you want to do. It's just modify when you need to. And like you reminded me that like I know my body and I can trust my body. I think I needed that reminder most of all was that I can trust my body to tell me when I don't need to push it any further. And especially with my relationship with food and movement and exercise and my body, just like throughout my life. But I still needed that reminder from you. And so, like, I was able to do all of the new workouts and all of the monthly calendars in my prenatal journey, filled in with the prenatal workouts that you have in the app and on YouTube and things like that. Yeah, yeah. Just made the adjustments that we needed, but I didn't have to feel like I was behind. And I really appreciated that, like, a lot of your work— all of your workouts can be modified for pregnancy. And I really needed that because I didn't want to get behind on the workouts, and I didn't want to feel like I was losing, losing out in the community because I wasn't doing the workouts. And so I love how flexible your plans are, and that was really essential for me. And then after having Iris, getting back into it with the postnatal, postpartum workouts that just really helped me regain the confidence, regain the strength in a way that wasn't going to cause damage. Yeah. And I really— I'm the person who's going to push as hard as I can. And that's not necessarily the best way when you're—

yes, when you're healing.

Yeah. When you're healing. And so to have you guiding me in the videos and also in person, like to have you be like, this is our 20-minute workout for the day, and I don't have to do more than that. Like, I can be satisfied with that. Yeah, that was just so incredibly helpful.

I think we all need this reminder. I did too, even being educated in prenatal and postnatal with my pregnancies.

Of you—

you're still you, your body is still really strong. In fact, your body is strong in so many different ways. But reminding yourself you don't have to like completely stop doing what you're doing during pregnancy. There are a few things we'll modify. There are certainly things that we will modify, especially early postpartum. But trust your body, trust the process. And I so remember having a like kind of an early conversation where we were working very early postpartum deep core pelvic floor, and you were like, I think I'm ready to run. And I was like, let's give it a little bit of time. Not that you you couldn't have gone out there and you could have gotten out and gone running, but it wasn't the best option that early for your core and pelvic floor. So we just talked about some strategies of, can we give it a couple more weeks of just strengthening, doing the things that you can do at home? But again, I think that's so common. You're like, I'm ready. I want to do this.

But also I was eager. I was so eager to get back to it, which I love.

And I was like, I get it. I totally understand. And we're still pretty early in this process. Your body is healing, and recognizing that is not a failure on your part. Your body is doing exactly what it's supposed to do in the healing process, but you're having to take care of an infant, and your body has been through a lot. So we have to give it a little more time and build up more strength and resilience and things like that. But, and you were, you were not defiant about it. You're like, okay, all right, but we need We need that reminder sometimes, and just the reminder that you will get back to running, and you have, of just— it will be there for you. I was so proud of you throughout all of that and your delivery, knowing that you have literally trained for this, that your body was strong, your body was ready, and mentally you were prepared as well to know, like you said, you can do hard things, you can do things that maybe you're unsure about or if you've never done before. Yeah, that was really— it was really an honor for me to be on that journey with you. And then Iris came and she's perfect. I love her.

Yeah, she's pretty great.

She is amazing. Yeah, so we got back— you— we got you back into doing all the things again. You— not that you had to give up that much. And very quickly with that tiny baby, you started traveling. Which I was so impressed with. And again, like, you're carrying a backpack on the back, a baby on the front, rolling a suitcase, whatever it is. That is what we train for.

Yes, that's literally what I was training for.

Yes. And then walking a million stairs or trudging through airports or like hiking or doing all of that. That's been really, really fun to watch as you've regained that strength. And again, I don't know how you do it, but traveling with a baby is seems so effortless to you, but I know it's not. That's why you give us all the tips on the blog.

Yeah, definitely. I'm glad it looks effortless because it is totally not.

Yes, I think every parent who's traveled with a child knows that, especially a baby. But I feel like even down to things like— I found this is the best backpack that you can wear with a baby carrier, that kind of stuff. I find so, is so helpful. That's the information that, that we all need, even before just taking that backpack to the park and not across the world.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Good.

I would love to talk about Steve, your husband Steve, and I want to be really mindful of it just because this is a hard thing to talk about. But when Iris was 6 months, right, 6 months old, you guys took—

6 months old. Yeah.

You had taken multiple trips again She's got a million stamps on her baby passport. So you took a trip to Egypt and on the flight back, I don't know if you want to tell us what—

I can tell it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

The reason I want to tell this is because it might save someone's life in the future on a plane or just in regular life. So my husband, my very healthy, running, strong, healthy eating husband choked to death. On the flight. We were about an hour and a half into a 9-hour flight and he took to death. They tried the Heimlich maneuver and it didn't work. I didn't know that it doesn't always work. And so we continued on to our home airport in Washington, D.C. We made that decision to keep going instead of to stop because it wasn't going to bring him back and it was it was going to be— not that it would be easy, but it would be easier for me to land and have him declared in the States rather than in London, which is where we would have stopped. My whole life changed in about 3 minutes. That's about how long it takes to choke. And people were— to say people were shocked is maybe the understatement of the millennium because he was so strong, he was so healthy, he was so careful. And he loved Iris more than anything except maybe me. And if he had been able to get that thing out, he would have, but he couldn't. And I had to figure it out. I had to figure out how to plan a funeral, how to sleep train my baby by myself, how to feed her. That was hard because we had just started solid foods. And so I'm like crying. Trying to get my baby to eat solid foods because she needs to learn, but I don't want her to choke to death because like I saw that happen. So it was incredibly difficult, but, and still is, but the very next day, like the day— so we landed at 9 o'clock at night. It was a very late night for us. A friend stayed with me that night, came over to my house and stayed with me, and the next morning I was like, I need to go to the gym. And I felt like that was not an appropriate response to this, but it was what I wanted to do. It's what Steve and I would have done together. It was the only thing that was gonna give me any hope of getting through the day, to get some aggression out, to get some— and like, I cried over at just at our little condo gym. And I, I just went through the motions, and you were there with me. I was doing an Amy video, so you were there with me getting me through it.

I—

because it was something that we did together, it was something that I knew he would want me to continue. I needed to work out. I needed to get back to as much normalcy as possible because everything else was not normal. And that was really what helped me through those first days of grief, was getting my workout in, which again sounds so incredibly inappropriate, but grief is not appropriate. It's just not. Having— I told the BAC, and I think you had mentioned it in a live, one of the things that we get to do in the BodyFit Athletic Club. And the whole community really surrounded me with prayers, donations, encouragement, just like reaching out to me. And even still, like, I'll post something about me and Iris and people will be like, Steve would be so proud. And so not just working out, but also the community has really helped me through the grief. Journey that I've had in the last year. Yeah.

Thank you for sharing that. It's— yeah, you're right, shocking. It doesn't even— can't even describe it. I think I remember hearing from you pretty shortly after. I think like we had an appointment scheduled and it just— yeah, nobody could believe it. It was just so unbelievably tragic. And I so appreciate you just saying doesn't feel appropriate, but nothing about grief is appropriate. And also, I, I think, and I know you've heard this a million times, that people are like, oh my gosh, I can't imagine going through that, especially with a baby. Like, you had a baby to take care of. You couldn't stay in bed. You couldn't. I'm like, how do you get through that? And I think it's been really beautiful to see, heartbreaking as well, to, to again be alongside in some capacity to be with you in this journey, but just how, you know, you knew you had to keep taking care of yourself. One, because that's exactly what Steve would have wanted. And let me just be the first to tell you that I'm— I feel very honored that I got to meet him. You guys came out for an event. He fell in love with Bingo.

He loved dogs.

He loved dogs. But just the way that he supported you in everything you did in your business all of that, but also just in your fitness journey of, we're gonna make time for you to meet with Amy even when we have a newborn. I will— he stepped up in so many ways. And just to see, like, nobody ever doubted how you guys felt about each other, but how he felt about you. And that support is so key, I think, in health, in fitness, and in life. But I think remembering that, like, most of us are over here being like, I would wouldn't have been able to get out of bed, but you were like, this is what Steve would have wanted, this is what Steve would have done, and this is how I keep showing up for Iris and for yourself. I think just, just, I'm just in awe of how you've been able to keep doing that. And just hearing the stories of that helped you keep going. Like, you had a baby, you wanted to keep traveling, also something Steve definitely wanted you to keep doing, right? Because he was your travel partner for many years. Yeah, but I just— it's been— I can't imagine it. And it's so heartbreaking to, to know that that grief is always gonna be there. But you have found ways to take care of yourself and keep showing up for yourself, and that's been an honor to watch.

So thank you.

Yeah, I feel like most people in grief would say you have good days and bad days. Do you feel like it's you have some days when it's been really hard to keep moving?

I— yeah, every day is the worst day of my life, right? Because I don't have Stephen. I never will again. And our relationship was so unique and loving. I feel like everybody should say this about their partner, but it's really true that we loved each other more than any two people have loved each other in the history of love.

Yeah. And you always got mistaken for honeymooners anywhere you went.

We did. Even after 10 years, people still asked us. Usually flight attendants on planes, people would ask us if we were on our honeymoon. We should have said yes more often.

I know, right?

Maybe we could have gotten some upgrades. So I definitely have days that are when it's easier to get up and work out. But there are some days when I have something planned on the calendar that I've been looking forward to, like a new workout that just came out. And I get up and it's— I just don't know if I can. I want to, but I don't know if I can. And so that— those are the days when I go to my favorite mobility workouts and I pick something where I just move my body and get some mobility and do something easy, do something calming. And so on my bad days, that's what I do. I just change to plan, and, and I get my movement in, even if it's just a 10-minute mobility workout. I just get it in, and then I go on with my day because I've got my movement in. I worked out with my friend Amy, and I set a good example for Iris.

Yes. Yeah. And Iris knows me, and I love it.

Yeah, she knows me.

So sweet. She knows me because we do video calls sometimes, but also like from the— and I love when people tell me that too, of my know you and have grown up with you. Because again, that is so important, especially for our girls, but for all of our kids to learn, like, this is something that makes mommy happy, that makes her feel good, that makes her feel strong. And not what we grew up with of you do this to be skinny, or you do this to look a certain way. And I think this generation, like, we are changing that for them. And I'm seeing it even in my daughter who loves to— she always wants to be in videos. She wants to work out. So I love that Iris is already so into it, which is—

she is. Yeah. I have like my 40 pounds that I'm doing my deadlift with, and Iris will come over with her little 1-pound pink weights that I use for the mobility or for kickboxing. And she's, she's ready.

She is ready.

I tell her all the time, you are so strong. I love that about you. I love that you're so strong.

I love it. Yes, we are so proud. And Steve would be so proud because, you know, you guys, again, you guys took her out running, you took her out in all the places. And I feel like she's— and she knows him. She will know him through you. I know that you've talked about that before, how that's been a really hard part of just— he loved her so much and he's missing everything about it. But she knows him because of you and because of others. Who are continuing to honor his memory. And she has so much of him in her.

Yes, she really does. Yeah.

This was really amazing. I have loved talking to you again, and even some things that I feel like I learned a few things that I didn't know about you. I felt like we've—

Oh, good.

Talked. Yeah, I know we know a lot of things about each other, but this is something I do with anybody who comes on the podcast. We call it Where Are You Today? I would love to hear where are you today in your workouts, in your healing process, what travel you have coming up, anything that you want to share?

Where I am today is I went for a run with Iris this morning through the snow because we still have snow from the big January snowstorm, and it's the middle of February now as we're recording this. We went through just a few snow mountains, but mostly the trails are good. So good, we got our 3 miles in with the stroller. Excellent. And I just got home right before this. I had a grief counseling appointment. I do that every other week.

Excellent.

Until I don't need it anymore. And I leave for Kenya on Saturday.

That's so exciting. You and I— Yes. Oh my gosh, I can't wait to see all the updates on social.

I know, I'm so excited. If you don't mind, I'll have everybody follow me on— Please. Half Full Passport on Instagram and Facebook at Half Full Passport. And halffullpassport.com is where you will get all of the content, all of the helpful stuff. Right now, I— we're recording this in mid-February. I still have some posts that I've got going live about our month in Spain, which was pretty fantastic, and Kenya will start up after that. So enjoy and send me a message and let me know that you found me from the BodyFit by Amy me, Be Where You Are Today podcast. Come find me.

It's amazing. And again, reminder, Half Full Passport is specifically for single parents traveling with kids, right? Whether they're babies or big kids, whether you've been through a divorce or going through grief, like, I feel like that stuff is needed, right? Again, you don't have to stop— you don't have to stop traveling because you have kids, or—

yeah. And there's a huge gap, yes, in help for single parents when it comes to travel, we are the ones who need the most help.

Totally.

So I wanted to fill that gap.

Yeah.

The name Half Full Passport comes from the half— the glass half full or half empty. And when life feels half empty, you need to remember that your passport can still be half full. So that's where that comes from.

I love that. I love that so much. Oh, good. So Half Full Passport, quick wit travel. And I'll also obviously We'll be putting this out there and tagging each other and collabing and all that, but I'll also make sure it's all in the description so you guys can follow Whitney, get lots of great tips.

I'm still trying to learn how to pack, but I'll send you my packing page.

I have a whole page dedicated to all the packing tips. Kurt will love it because he loves a good spreadsheet.

Thank you, Whitney.

This was really fun, and I always love catching up with you, and we are going to take a trip together. Sometime. So yes, be on the lookout for that, guys. We have talked about it and the timing just hasn't worked out, but when we get to do it, that will be a fun thing to do. So thank you for being here.

Thank you for having me. I love this. I'm really glad I got to do this.

Thank you so much for being with us today, Whitney. I'm Amy Schemper, reminding you to show up, keep moving, and be where you are today.