3 key confidence lessons from High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard

Welcome to the self esteem and confidence mindset with me, Johnny Pardo. Do you want to feel more confident in life? Well, today I'm going to share three key lessons from high performance habits that I really learned from Brendon Bouchard's book that I'm going to share with you. And if you stay until the end, I have a special additional lesson for you then as well. So this is a book by Brendan Bouchard who is one of the, if not the top high performance coaches in the world. His work is incredible and you may have come across Brendan. You may not just watch him on YouTube or listen to him. His energy is outstanding, his charisma is amazing and he's built it up over time. And actually that's, that's part of his book. Two of the concepts are energy and courage to the main things he teaches in it now he talks about actually he shares his story. When he was in points of serious like downs like he was in debt, he really didn't like life and real low points. And then he changed his life around which is often a common thing in personal growth. People have really transformed their lives and we can learn a lot from these kind of people. When I started applying quite a lot, what have he said? I could start feeling this certainty within myself when perhaps I go into certain situations, whether it's personal, professional, before, and I'd be like doubting myself, be like, who am I to do this? I'm not worthy of being here. When I started doing some of the lessons, some of what he was teaching, I felt more on the ball, more prepared, more energetic. I felt like I had more influence over certain situations. Now, like I said, Brendan is one of the most charismatic leaders I've known out there and the six main areas he teaches in the book, Clarity, being really clear on what you want. Energy. Being able to create energy. Because energy is everything. Necessity. Really, really having a driving why for why you're doing things. Productivity. We live in a world full of destruction, destructions. Well, it is destruction destructive to you sometimes, but I meant distractions. Being able to be productive. Talks about creating great levels of influence. Again, you can't control other people. You can have a high degree of influence over certain things though. And then courage. Being able to really utilize courage and courage. Once again, I want to be really clear. Courage is not the absence of fear. Every single human being has fear. If you think, oh I'm scared of this, I'm going to back out of it and your brain starts coming out of BS excuses, you are not the only one. Pretty much everyone I've spoken to has experienced admitted to experiencing this. Not everyone admits it. It is a human thing though. We all have fear. Courage is pushing through it anyway, even if it involves little steps. So that's his six step. Now I want to ask you this. How are you going to carry on with the way things are now? If you're listening to this and your life is amazing and you don't want to improve anything, great. I'm so pleased for you. And I want to add more value now given what I create. Trying to improve self esteem, confidence and mindset working for your personal growth. That's not usually the case for people. So you'll know if it's true for you or not that you want to improve things. But how is it going to serve you carrying on with the way things are or do you want to make a shift? So I'm going to give you three key lessons I learned from the book. Now that really helped me. The first thing, find a reason to succeed. A real driving why. Now I've, I've had this many times in my life. My, my why was just to look significant, look impressive to other people. And that doesn't drive you as much as something deep and emotional can drive you. And a lot of us are driven by like I want to look more important, I want to stand out a little bit more. So you've got to have a true, deep, meaningful reason to succeed. That's the first one. Something that and a true reason, a deep why is something that is both for you, something that you really love and also something where you're helping others. So that fills both the ego and the soul needs within you. So for example, I, I have money targets I want to hit now it's not. I don't want just numbers on the screen or notes of dead people on it. I just want, I want money or design money for certain reasons. Some of them are for me to have more freedom like grow like go to growth events, go traveling. I love going traveling and going to different countries and having different experiences. And then the other reasons are to do deep meaningful reasons like giving to Great Ormond Street Hospital to save ill children because I lost a family member who didn't survive. So that's a true reason to succeed for me to really keep going even when times are hard. And that builds confidence as well because when you know you've got a meaning rather than just I want to look more important, I want to look better. You've got a more Deeper desire. The second thing is weekly reviews and self awareness. Brendan talks about having weekly reviews a week. How'd you get on this week? Did you get the priorities done? Did you even set priorities for your week? I mean, we get so busy, we don't even take time to think of our priorities. This is a key takeaway. Reviewing your week every single week. Like, what am I intending to do next week? And not getting frustrated if it doesn't go to plan. Just ask yourself at the end of the week, why, what, what made it not go to plan? What can I do in place to implement more things that I wanted to achieve, I want to achieve in the coming week? Making sure you've got weekly reviews and do not come up with the excuse, I don't have time to review your week. If you can't take even 30 minutes a week to review your, your week. You do not have a life. Like, you are not going to have a life if you do not find 30 minutes to review your week. Okay? And Brendan talks about this, reviewing your week again and again and again. It allows me to ask myself, go through this as a process. Ask yourself what you want, why you want it, and what you're going to do about it. Rather than, I've got to do this, this and this and this and this and this. Need to take a step back from that and be like, okay, what are priorities now? Probably something like, your family, your friends are going to be priorities. So, yeah, you want to schedule that in your calendar. Of course, then you might think, well, well, I'm currently working the job, but I'd really like to run my own business. And instead of think putting all the stuff in, like, oh, you know, gotta go to the cleaners that day, gotta do, I'm gonna do some hoovering, then I'm gonna do finish this. I'm gonna design a nice logo for my website. Even though that's absolutely a waste of time, if you're starting a business to even create that kind of thing, you will actually go out and prospect anyway. That's a side note. You then need to start thinking, right, what the priorities, Okay, I want to start a business. I'm going to dedicate 20 minutes each day to working on my business, for example, so you know what you want and how you're gonna do it. You want to get promoted in the day job. What are the things I need to focus on at the start of my day that are really going to move the needle? Not tidy, not answering emails is probably one of them. Okay, what do you need to proactively do so weekly reviewing, being really clear on what you want and what you need to do to achieve that. Then the third thing he talks about, and this really helped shift that second thing. When you start doing things that really matter to move the needle, you will build confidence within yourself rather than getting caught on this cycle of busyness that everyone claims. Okay, then maybe that's an exaggeration. The majority of people I meet are always claiming they're busy, ever. It's true. Everyone is always busy. I believe you could be busy watching Netflix. You could be busy scrolling your phone for five hours a day, which Pete, which is the average screen time between five and eight hours, I do believe. So we're all busy in some kind of way. It's just about prioritizing. The weekly review is key. I'm very, very passionate about this second point. As you can tell, self awareness and weekly reviews is really, really key. Otherwise you get caught in a cycle, you're not doing what you want to do, and you lose trust within yourself. And then the third point that I learned from this, the third lesson is deadlines. Setting yourself deadlines. Like, I actually coach people on how to. On starting podcasts as well. And I've got some brilliant clients that I've worked with and both pot and also in the confidence space that I coach on. And I'm bringing back that. Again, people who I've spoken to weren't quite a right fit for, like, what I'm doing. They're like, yeah, I might do it a few months down the line. And they've not given a date. They've not given a clear date. And I'm like, really trying to cut them down to it. And they're just like, yeah, I don't know. And that tells me they're not ready to prioritize podcasting, which therefore means immediately. I don't want to work with them. Not, no disrespect to them as a human being. They're usually amazing people. Like, they're being proactive in the first place, yet they're just not willing to prioritize podcasting. I want to work with people who prioritize it personally. So you need to put deadlines on things when you're going to do things. Now, obviously you can't do everything, so you got to be reasonable. Again, it comes back to setting your priorities and deadlines. When people like, likewise. Whether that's confidence and mindset space. Space. Sorry, let me say that again. Whether that's confidence and mindset coaching. In that space, or whether it's podcast coaching or whether it's even just general sort of live coaching or support I've done with other people. If people are slow getting back to me and they don't put a deadline on when they're going to start something, I know they're not the right fit because they're not going to prioritize it. So do this for your own life. Start putting deadlines on things that really matter, else they're never going to get done. Just gonna keep going again and again and again. And then you put deadlines on things that don't really matter. And you wonder why you're stuck in life because you're not prioritizing the most important things I put. Like, I'm launching a new podcast and it's actually a podcast on podcasting. Because so many people reached out that I'm in a point. I'm like, look, I'm just gonna make a podcast on podcasting. I'm gonna keep this podcast of. Of course. Yep. I've got bed clear deadlines when it needs to come out. Now, you may not meet your deadline. Something may come up. That's okay. That's life. Yet you adjust it. Don't adjust it too much, obviously, if it's really important to you. But putting a dead and putting a deadline to something is going to make it really matter and therefore move the needle in what matters to you. As you can tell, I'm quite passionate about those because I just say, like, I so much rubbish. And I used to say this as well. Like, I'm not going to sit here and say, you know, I'm perfect. Well, no one's perfect anyway, I'm like faultless in any way, because I used to be, like, putting things off again and again and again. And I had to catch myself out for it now and then something can happen. I could catch myself out doing this. But I hear people say again and again and again, I'm gonna work on myself when I'm gonna do this. When the most dangerous words I hear, basically you're telling your subconscious mind it's not a priority to work on yourself. When you start putting deadlines on things, you start prioritizing, taking time out to prioritize you to identify what are your keys for a week that really matters. And don't use your, like, the people with the most challenging circumstances, busy, like crazy lives. Again, we're all busy. I won't use that. We're all crazy. Like, you know, single parents, multiple businesses, all sorts of Like I found I've seen people like that find a way to make time, a business grow something, do something they really want because it matters, even if it's a smaller amount of time. So if we combined all the lessons I've learned from Brendan, his book High Performance Habits, which I really recommend you read if you've not all listened to the audiobook. I believe it's an audiobook. I actually read the, the paperback. It's got me an audiobook. It's Brendan B. Shard, but sorry. And I would say the overarching thing is really finding a reason why something's important to you and making time for it because then you're signaling you matter and what you really want matters. And when you don't, you signal. I'm not going to prioritize me. I'm not gonna listen to what I want and I'm not going to give me what I want. Imagine saying that to like a three year old. Look, I don't care what you want. I'm just going to be busy and ignore you. That's what you're saying to yourself when you don't start focusing on what the priorities and wider priorities in your life. That's definitely an overarching theme I've learned from the book. Now I want you to go away and think about what are you gonna make changes in your life? Okay, so go away and think about what I've said today and think about what's a priority in your life now. Just before I go on to the final point, I want to thank you for listening. I really appreciate you for being here. And I also want to mention something awesome coming up. A huge offer where you can really actually look at what the priorities in your life and move you towards what they are. So I've got an opportunity to, for you to personally work with me. So if you're intrigued, all you've got to do is message me the word confidence on Instagram or email me the word confidence to coachingparlow.com now I've had people reach out, very proactive people reach out already. This is a very, very early opportunity for this. I'm going to give more opportunities, well, more mentions to this I've had people reach out. Thank you so much. You know, spaces will fill out. So if you're intrigued with an opportunity to work with me, we're just, we'll just have a casual chat for first of all over email, over DM and see if it might be right for you. But just message me the word confidence on Instagram or email me coaching to coaching johnnypollo.com this will be listed in the show notes as well if you want to get early in on this as well. So the final point I want to share with you Habits, your habits must serve you, your well being and relationships. Okay. And other people. So this is the final point. I pick lesson I picked out from the book. Really make sure your habits are actually serving you. So we talked about the priorities. Another step to that. Rather than just scheduling things, do schedule things in the calendar that are important to you know what you want first. Making sure what you do repeatedly, which is a habit, is serving you. So if you got a habit of and we've all got bad habits, right? And there's no one's gonna have outstanding all good habits, no bad habits, that's not going to happen yet. If you got a majority of bad habits that keep coming into your life and not helping you, that's not going to help you. Obviously state the obvious, but we don't know. We're not always using common sense because we just get so caught on autopilot mode going through the same things. Are your habits serving you? So for example, and what this means is, are you, have you got a habit of sitting on your phone for two hours in the morning and then you get anxious, you get stressed. The first thing you do, maybe even an hour, maybe even half an hour, 30 minutes is going to do that. Or do you have the habit of getting up, sitting in silence and reflecting on how you're feeling and then just writing down your goals or whatever it is like and make sure the habits work for you. Some people like meditating for an hour, one hour. That's not me. Some people like exercising in the morning. That's not me either. I like exercising midday, love it. I like just going for a walk for an hour and just thinking. That's what I do. Just one hour thinking. And I come up with ideas like this because I'm allowing my brain time and space to think. No distractions, not even music, just thinking. So make sure your habits serve you, your wellbeing and others. Okay? So that's what I've got for you. Today went a bit longer than I wanted to, but it's really important lessons I learned from the book. So I appreciate you for being here. You're bettering yourself, improving yourself and you're improving others by being the best you. So thank you so much for doing that for yourself and others. And remember, you are in control of your own self esteem and confidence.