Are You Triggered Too Easily?

Foreign. Hey, my friends, it's Brendon Burchard. And welcome to a special episode. An episode I usually don't do in that we're posting this one both on the Brendon show and over on HPX podcast. And I'm doing that because we just happen to have a deadline coming up and I wanted you all to be knowledgeable about it and ready for it. And that is on Wednesday at midnight, we are closing down my coaching membership enrollment. So if you would like some coaching from me, every single month where I go live for two hours, I teach a brand new strategy related to high performance. So you can improve your career or your wealth or your health, improve your relationships, improve your finances, improve your overall well being and ability to get ahead. Well, that's what we do in our coaching program. And you can just go to hpxcoaching.com that's hpxcoaching.com and right now the reason we're about to close it is because we have an open enrollment there. And you will see that right now you can save something like I think it's like 50% off for the year of coaching. So make sure you check it out. And what I'd like to do is share some perspective in this episode that I posted recently about on Instagram that kind of caught a little bit of fire and a little bit of flack. And I thought I'd share it as a reason to always seek some outside perspective as you are growing in your career and in your life and trying to make a greater difference, that it's easy to get sort of, you know, trapped in your own house or at your office and not really be aware of the ways that you can grow and the ways that things are interpreted and the real personal power you have in all of that. So I posted this quote and it said, if you are easily provoked, angered, weakened, scared, stressed or discouraged, then it's time to face that fact that you are easily provoked like that. To commence a great exploration of personal development, to learn meditation, to take the reins of your emotions, to decide to no longer be triggered by the world, but rather be a steady observer of it and yourself. We are reactive adolescents or we are mature adults and role models. Some never make the choice and society suffers for it. Now, I know not everyone loves a quote like that. When I'm saying that some people don't make the choice between being reactive adolescents or mature adults, but I'm sure you know people like that. And if you're honest, just like I can say you Know what? Sometimes I am a reactive little brat. Sometimes I don't manage my own mind. Sometimes I get triggered too easily, sometimes I get frustrated and upset about dumb stuff. I think that's just part of being aware of ourselves, aware of how we are interpreting and receiving and reacting to the world. And while some people say, well Brendan, that's really awful because you know, someone literally said, by the way, shame on you Brendan, for, you know, dismissing people who find life difficult to get through. And I kind of laughed because I thought, well you know, I appreciate the shaming but however, that's exactly what I'm saying is that life can be difficult. It's what I'm saying is that because life can be difficult because there is suffering, because there injustice, because there are haters and jerks and rude and a holes out there, then guess what? We'd better learn to manage our own internal mind and world. We'd better anticipate that things are going to make us upset. We'd better be better and proactive in managing our mind in those moments to stay centered. And that takes a life long effort, doesn't it? It's not like one day you're Zen Buddha for the rest of your life you will still get hooked, you will still get angry, you will still feel scared or stressed. No matter how successful you become or how perfect you get at your yoga breathing practice, or that you get at your qigong in the morning, or that you get, you know, when you're all zenned out in the forest, we all can easily be provoked. And knowing that we can be triggered, knowing that we can be upset, knowing that we can be very reactive from small stimulus, that's a good thing to know. I love that I know I can be a jerk or a child about things. I love that, that knowledge that self awareness is in itself personal power. Because I'm like, oh, you know what she just said that thing that really upsets me. Take a breath Brendan. Breathe in like five times. Breathe out like five more. Don't hold your breath, don't grit your teeth, don't get angry. This isn't a big deal dude, calm yourself down. That ability to calm ourselves down and not be reactive animals is one of our great blessings as human beings and we have to really leverage that. And I speak to you with deep respect because I feel like our society is suffering right now because we have so many people who've never actually made that choice. They've never done the homework on themselves. They've never thought or explored what triggers them. They Just keep getting triggered. They've never taken personal responsibility for their own emotions, their own feelings, their own behaviors. So they keep blaming everybody. Oh, well, it's my negative environment, my negative spouse. Oh, this person keeps making me so angry, or this thing keeps happening. And you don't understand, Brandon. You don't understand, Brendan. I go, oh, well, be careful when you start saying you don't understand to anybody. Not just me, to anybody. Because, you know, there's only two things to understand about human beings. We all experience struggle and suffering, and we all experience progress, and we can all experience perspective, and we can all grow and get better. It's pretty simple. Struggle, progress. We're always, you know, in between the two or on one side or the other in every domain of our life at all times. We can understand that of each other. I can understand when a person is going through financial troubles, even if I'm not right now, because you know what? I've been there. I can understand when a person has been left or hurt or lonely or lost somebody. And I can understand people who are going through things that I've never even gone through, because I can understand as a human being, hurt and pain and disappointment and sadness and those difficult days when we have to make choices about how we're going to show up or live. Those difficult days when we have to do things that we don't want to do. Those difficult days that we all feel and sense and experience. And I think it's important this conversation, because I feel that there is a lot of negative energy in the zeitgeist right now. There's a lot of vitriol in our culture, and there's a lot of people who are getting so angry, whether it's at the news or some, you know, text or some tweet that somebody said, and they get so fired up and so angry, and they pull out all the weaponry to fight and go at it. And sometimes they just need perspective to take a few breaths and realize, wow, is this something I'm really going to spend time arguing and getting upset and, like, causing conflict about and screaming and getting, like, stupid or, you know, spreading a bunch of hate online? I mean, don't you wish we could pull aside every kid in elementary school or middle school? And when they act out or they freak out or they scream or they throw something, we just pull them aside and say, hey, I know that you're angry, but you don't have to take it out on other people. I know that you've been hurt, but you don't have to accuse everybody else. I know that that one person did this one thing, but not everyone's like that. I know that it feels really unfair, but it doesn't mean everyone's against you. I know that you're sad, but doesn't mean there's a brighter tomorrow coming. You know, we all need perspective. I think one of the most beautiful and greatest gifts of having a coach or doing this personal development work that you're doing here is the power of perspective. You know, it's like every time I get really upset about something or down about something or, you know, I do a little woe is me, Brendan, stuff that we all do. I think of the people who I've met and coached, advised help seen in my seminars, who don't have a family anymore, who lost their family in some tragedy, who don't have use of their legs, their back, their arms, who financially are living in their car, who lost somebody close and dear to them, who are going through a mental illness or a major health issue, who got fired from their job, who face discrimination, who have to deal with injustices. And I go and, brendan, you're complaining? Come on, kid, get your act together. Get some perspective here. Let's remember what's important. Let's ask, what can you do now? Let's take better control of your emotions and your energy. And it's not always easy for anybody, just like me. Two stories, right? Struggle and Progress. Just today I did an Instagram joking. You know that? An Instagram live. I was joking about how I shared with my wife earlier. I was like, gosh, I don't feel motivated today. Which anytime I say that, she totally laughs. Because of course, I'm the guy that wrote, sort of, I think as of today, it is the best selling title on motivation of the century so far, if I have my numbers right? So no other book with the title Motivation in it has done what Motivation Manifesto has done, Both the hardcover but also the audiobook and the course that we released behind it. You're talking about millions and millions of views and downloads and listens and purchases. I mean, it's a monster. And here I am saying, honey, I don't feel motivated. But that's okay, because when I don't feel motivated, it's not like something happened to me. It's like I always say, you didn't lose Motivation. You lost your focus on the very thing you're supposed to be fighting for. It's a focus problem. So all I gotta do is, okay, let me get my body, my mind right okay, let me bounce in place 10 times, take 10 deep breaths. Let me do some qigong. Let me do some yoga work. Okay, great. That took seven minutes. I feel more energized. There's breath going through my body. Thank you for this oxygen. Awesome, then. All right, let me write down three things I need to achieve by the end of the day. Got it. Here's three things. Let's go work them right away. Bam, bam, bam. Good job. I feel better, you know, and so, yeah, I gotta motivate my own self. I've gotta raise my emotional level and raise my focus from where it can get just like anybody else. That's the work. We always have to do it. We all have to take command and personal responsibility for how we are feeling. And we have to seek to. To improve it or at least ask what is required of us right now? What's the emotion or the energy that the world really needs from me? Cause sometimes, you know what? Yeah, you don't feel good, mom, but you gotta get yourself there for the kids. I know that's unfair, but the kids need you. I know it's unfair that sometimes I don't feel like going into the office, but my team counts on me to be the inspiration, and I gotta rise up to meet that need and that point of service. Yeah, that's what life's about. It's about getting perspective and then taking personal responsibility and activating that personal power we all have. And if you're into this or you recognize that you simply need service or help in this area, please go over to hpxcoaching.com it's gonna redirect you to our coaching membership. And I hope you become a member, because you know what? Sometimes we just need some training. Sometimes we need some perspective, some new strategies, some expert guidance from somebody who's been there, done that, and spent a few decades studying human behavior. You know, I'm never surprised that much anymore by human behavior, because I've spent my life studying it. I'm fully aware of why we do things or why we act the way that we do. And sometimes you need some of that education to get to that place where you better manage your emotions and your feelings. And again, if that's you, just go to hpxcoaching.com because maybe we could give you some new strategies for improving your relationships, your mind, your body, your career, your personal finances, your ability to actually reach that next level of success more sanely, more quickly. Maybe we can give you some community people who will support you and cheer you on in our online community in the coaching program is astounding. Maybe you just need to be able to ask a few questions and I can take your questions finally, because certainly that's not happening. Through podcast and through the coaching program, you're able to ask questions. And I take questions every single month in that last, whatever, 30, 40 minutes of our live coaching. And I just guide people through what they're dealing with. Sometimes they're dealing with marital problems, financial problems, health problems, motivation problems. It's a challenge. I get it. But I'd love to share with you what we've learned through all of our research at the High Performance Institute, through all the work I've had as a been doing as a coach since what, 2006, full time, with all of the tens of thousands of people. I've been blessed to train in live environments and taking on some really tough issues. I'd like to bring some of that perspective to your life, especially if you're trying to go faster, especially if you're trying to let go of some old stuff, move in new directions. You're in a major transition. You recognize you need a little bit of support, a little bit of help, maybe a few more cheering voices, not just, you know, from a podcaster or someone on Instagram or on social media, but somebody who actually spends their life helping people coach to better human behavior. That's my work. People always say, well, what makes you different, Brendan? I said, well, I just don't. You know, I was blessed to be doing real work with people before social media and I still do. You know, a lot of people who call themselves coaches on the Internet now have never actually had a full time coaching client or full time coaching practice. You know, they're teaching, they're inspiring on the Internet. But calling themselves coaches is a little bit of a stretch. You know, they're being an online influencer, call it that. But to be a real coach, to be certified at it, to do the work and to put in the decade to learn it, to have spent decades in personal professional development, I think that does make me a little bit different. It's why I get the call when the Oprah Winfrey Network, they want their team to be trained on something, or when Usher wants his team to be trained on something, or when Fortune 50 CEOs, millionaire entrepreneurs, stay at home moms, people who are real, real, real interested in making great progress in their life. And I get the call. I get the call when someone has to turn around the company, but I also get the call when Someone's like, oh, my gosh, we just had our fourth child. My mind is going crazy. I get the call when people are like, my finances. I mean, I just, I just sold my company, Brent. I'm richer than I've ever been, but I'm unhappy. I also get the call when people say, I'm just starting out and I ain't got no money. And I've had the blessing of coaching and training people in pretty much every area of life at this stage. And I think I might be able to serve you, but you kind of make the call. So here's what I'd like to invite you to do. Go to hpxcoaching.com hpxcoaching.com, get yourself signed up. You can sign up for as little as $49 a month. There's multiple plans. But if you sign up at $49 a month and you attend our live training, which happens to be next Friday, if you don't love it, ask for your money back. No harm, no foul. And if you stay with us and one month, you don't want anymore, cancel. But listen, you're going to spend 49 bucks this month. You're going to spend 49 bucks. Probably this week. People are going to spend 49 bucks on a night out in the town, but very few people will spend 49 bucks to deeply improve their life. And either 49 bucks is going to give you a night on the town or it's going to give you two hours with me working on your life. And I just say give it a shot. Especially if you've never had coaching or virtual coaching or virtual training, you're going to love this high performance program. It's incredibly powerful. We call HPX coaching now. Just go to hpxcoaching.com you'll be redirected. Get yourself signed up because we go live next Friday and you only have tonight, and I think actually tomorrow night, your ability to become a member for that one expires. We'd love to have you in hpxcoaching.com I hope you enjoyed this conversation tonight about how easy it is to get provoked, but how we must all get perspective, take control of our personal power, start designing the life that we want to experience. And the real life that we want to experience comes through managing our emotions and our feelings better. I hope you get that and I appreciate every one of you. Being a member of Team HPX is what I call you guys. HPX stands for the High Performance Experience. I call you my team because I feel like every day you wake up trying to do the same thing I do. How do you live a vibrant life today? How do you live love matter? How do you deliver with excellence today? How do you lead today? How do you live your best life today amid all this chaos and this turmoil and this difficulties of life? I am honored to be on that journey with you. And I'd like to sign off tonight with something that Denise was saying all throughout Transformation Week. Remember, you can choose to be ordinary, or you can choose to become extraordinary. So my friends today go be extraordinary.