Feel More Engaged and Fulfilled

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Hey, my friends, it's Brandon Burchard and welcome to a special episode of the Brendon Show. Hey, I'm Brendon Burchard and I'm honored to be your high performance coach today. With this episode, I've spent the last 20 years studying human behavior change and writing, coaching and training literally at the top levels on the topics of motivation, focus, productivity, confidence and more. My goal, inspired by my own personal journey, is to help you and my audience live love and matter, which means to feel more vibrant, more connected and and more fulfilled in every area of your life. That's what we're doing today. If you liked today's episode, grab a screenshot and share it on Instagram. Just tag me Enonbruchard so I can see you and give you a shout out or a hello. And if you want to go to another level of personal development in your life this month, be sure to join me live every month in my coaching program. Just visit HPXCoaching to get signed up. I teach a brand new personal development session every single month. Meaning it's like a personal development seminar for you. Live every single month on the first of the month and then after I teach that for about 75 minutes, then we do live breakouts where you get to meet new people, network with people, set your monthly goals and establish real accountability for your growth. Listen, you know that expert guidance and real consistency and an inspiring community is critical to your growth. So join me this month on the 1st. Just go to hpxcoaching.com that's hpxcoaching.com it's time to level up, my friend. It's time to take your year back. It's time to find that focus and that confidence and that vibrancy and that vibe again. Go to hpxcoaching.com and and let me be your coach into fuller levels of high performance in every area of your life. Now, without further ado, let's jump in to today's episode.

You need three things to feel like you're going to consistently be at your best so that you can perform. Okay, we need these three things. Number one, full engagement. And you've heard this huge conversation worldwide about mindfulness. All it's saying is get here, get in this moment, put your body and your mind like right here, like bam, get present. And you've got to be able to do that consistently over the long term if you really want to succeed. And I know you already know that, but how many times you know have you found yourself Just going through the motions. You know, you just kind of get up, you go over, you slam down that coffee or that morning shake, and then you're off to the day. But then you realize it might be three, four o', clock, and you haven't felt yourself all day. You know what I mean? You haven't felt your heart, you haven't noticed your breath. You haven't really observed your own attitude and your own thoughts. You've been sort of oblivious to other people because you're typing along, they come in and express a need, and you found yourself answering something, but they left the room. And you don't even remember what you just talked about with them. You ever been there? So maybe you can score yourself. Let's be honest. If I parachuted into your life here and I followed you around the last 30 days and I said, how present are you? Being one, you were not present. You were checked out, going through the motions. Ten, man, you were just, like, aware. I mean, you had like that Dalai Lama awareness thing going on. You were just like, vibrant and in the moment, you were just like, right there. And people could feel it. Where were you in the last 30 days? So I hope that as I talk through this with you today, there's not a sense of, like, I figured everything out. You and me, we're going to work on these high performance habits our entire life. When I talk about high performance habits, it's very different than other books about, you know, habit. Most books about habit are about just how do you form one so that it becomes unconscious and you don't have to think about it again. And I'm like, that's not the kind of habit that makes you succeed over the long term, ever. It's not unconscious competence that keeps somebody winning over and over and over. It's mastery. And mastery requires us to fully engage, and it requires us to be deliberate about our thoughts, our feelings, our emotions, how we're doing our work. And so these practices we're going to have to work at for life, and engagement is one of them. We all have our ups and downs of engagement throughout the day. Our goal is to get you to higher levels of those. And let me just give you a simple tool right off the bat. You need to set up some kind of trigger or triggers throughout the day that bring you back to presence in your work and in your relationships. I don't know what they are for you, but a trigger is when something happens, you teach yourself to do something else right? It's like a cue happens. You trigger Yourself. That's like the basics of like habit development. And what we're trying to get you to do is if A happens then you do B to make you more present. Let me give you simple examples of mine. When I'm at home and let's say I'm working and family team, somebody comes into a room. One of my ways to get present with people is when I'm sitting down and somebody walks in and they want to talk. Like if somebody comes into my office as an example at my house or here, one of the things I try to train myself to do is if somebody wants to talk, I stand up out of my chair and I engage them. Because if I'm sitting down I might be like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I don't really see them.

So soon as someone, hey Brendon, I.

Try to get up. Yes. And it's just a simple thing, right? Same thing with presence. For me on my phone, if you looked on my alarms, there's all these little labels that go off throughout the day. Same thing on my computer throughout the day, these little alarms are going off that are helping me kind of get back into the moment. You know, I for myself personally, I meditate every day. And sometimes, sometimes it's twice a day. In general, it's at least one meditation per day, 20 minutes. If you want to know how I do that to stay present and more engaged and fulfilled throughout the day. I have a video on YouTube you can check out called the Release Meditation Technique RMT. We've taught RMT to over 2 million people now have watched that video. I mean, I don't know how many thousands or hundreds of thousands of downloads by now of the tools or the sheets for those and just Google release meditation technique and my name and watch that. But it's a practice that's conditioning presence for me. And we found a lot of high performers do meditate. Here's the interesting thing though. We did not find that that one specific thing correlated with their long term performance more important than the other things that are in this book. Meaning maybe meditation was a part of the them generating energy which we'll talk about. But it wasn't the only thing that gave them the performance edge. Does that help? Because I think what's happened in personal development especially today with like hackers, they're like do this one thing and that one thing will make all the difference forever. And I'm like, no. I know a lot of people who meditate who are jerks. I know a lot of people who meditate they're very calm, but they couldn't be productive out of a paper bag. Okay? So it's never just one thing. What we found is it's a set of deliberate practices and habits that will.

Help you get there.

Okay? So trust that I'm not giving one silver bullet here. We're doing a comprehensive training and approach to this conversation. I need you to be more fully engaged in your work, more fully engaged in your relationships, more fully engaged in your health. Because, you know, what people do is they disengage. And when you disengage from your relationships, you're out of presence. You're out of that finding of fulfillment. Because a lot of people ask Brendan, how do I find fulfillment? And maybe they see something that I'm doing online or something someone else is doing in their world, and they say, oh, they must be so much more fulfilled than me because they're doing X, Y and Z. And that's a big mistake. Don't make that. You know, I remember when I was, you know, coming up in the industry, I'd see some, you know, special, you know, some famous CEO, and I'd see him, you know, traveling in luxury, or I would see somebody, you know, oh, they had a big team or look at their big fancy house, and my mindset would be wrong. And it would be thinking, oh, well, they must be so much more fulfilled than me because they have those things. But more things aren't going to make you more fully engaged and more things aren't going to make you more fulfilled. What will bring high performance but that sense of engagement and fulfillment in life is this. How are you engaging the moment, the situations, the persons around you and your craft, Those things are what really are mattering. Like, how are you engaging what you do have? I know people who say all the time at the top levels, you know, who aren't high performing, they might have financial success, but they're not high performing in their life. Does that make sense? Maybe they're achieving a lot, but they're burning themselves out and they wreck their relationships. And, I mean, who wants that life? But maybe they got some money. And I hear the ones who are not performing well, but maybe they got lucky or maybe they did work really, really hard, but they blew up the rest of their life to do that. They'll often say things like, man, Brendon, I wish I could go back to a time when it was so much easier. I got all these things. A nicer house and higher thread count and fancier shampoo and whatever else they Buy I don't know. And they'll say, I got all these things, but I'm not happy. And their lack of fulfillment isn't going to be fulfilled by filling up their bank account a little bit more. It's just not where it's going to come from. Your next level of fulfillment and high performance is going to come from training yourself to more fully engage in the moment. Let me say it again. Your next level of fulfillment in life, literally, life fulfillment satisfaction and high performance are both correlated. And we can measure Life Satisfaction Scale, High Performance Indicator Scale, both those are strongly correlated with how you are deciding to engage in the moment. Where there's engagement and presence there really matters. If we can up those things, then the research in my interviews suggest that you'll be more fulfilled and you'll be higher performing. So score yourself. How are you really engaging the day? Are you conscious? Are you deliberate? Are you aware? Are you present? Or are you just going through the motions, man? And if you're just going through the motions, don't make the mistake I made when I was a young person, okay? I'm still young. Don't make the mistake I remember making in my 20s so often in that I would say, well, I'm not engaged because the work sucks, this job sucks. You know, I'm not engaged here because.

I don't like that co worker.

And you cannot blame your level of engagement on anybody else. You control your level of engagement in life. You cannot blame anybody else. And soon as you do that, you're tearing yourself from your personal power and you're guaranteeing that you're not going to fill your dream because what you'll end up doing is you'll just, you know, it's almost like blade by blade of excuses and blame. You're knocking down, you know, your own potential. And so be very careful to ever blame engagement on other people or anything else.

Hey, it's Brendan and I want to jump in the middle of this episode here real quick and tell you about something I'm really excited about and something that answers a question that many of you have for me all the time, which is, Brendan, where do you get this crazy focus and energy in your life? And the truth is, I've developed a supplement line that really helps me do that. And frankly, I needed to. I don't know about you, but sometimes when you're trying to achieve big things, a lot of stress comes along. And as you're trying to achieve bigger things, you need to be on your A game more often. You need to be mentally sharp, you need to be mentally prepared. You need to be mentally energized and productive. And not once in a while, but like every day, you have to be on. And sometimes guzzling more coffee isn't going to do it. You have to use what we call nootropics, which are, you know, basically supplements that help optimize your brain. And yes, we have a product for exactly that. It's called HPEX Optimized and it is our most popular product. And you can get it. It's back in stock@HPX wellness.com that's HPX wellness.com you'll find HPX Optimize for your mental focus and energy there. You'll also find my favorite powdered energy drink that we created, this 100% organic and vegan. And you'll find my essentials, which is my daily multi that I take, that covers my energy, that covers my longevity, that covers my immunity, that covers my brain and body health that I absolutely love. And you will feel the difference. Go to HPX Wellness.com right now. HPX Wellness.com.

The second big one, though, is joy. Joy. If you're not as wealthy as you wanted to be, you, you're probably not as joyful on the wealth journey as you should be. I was amazed by this. The level of happiness that high performers have. I mean, that's a big life outcome in the measures of psychology, right? Whether or not people are happy. And there's lots of scales that have been conducted and used over the years to determine that. And we leveraged a lot of that to make sure that we validated our sort of our overall construct here. It was amazing to see how happy high performers are worldwide now. You think, well, no doubt, Brendan, they're performing well, of course they'd be happy. Yeah. But one thing was really interesting. We think often the cart before the horse, we say, oh, well, you know, they became happy because they're high performing. But in my interviews, I often found that when somebody switched their attitude and became happy, in other words, generated happiness, then they started performing higher. It's like they're not happy just because they're wealthy. They got happy and started feeling wealthier in all areas of their lives. Right. The abundance came into their life. It's not like abundance came in, thank God, now I'm happy. It was reverse order. It was, they chose positive emotions over and over and over and over and over. Meaning they chose their attitude, they chose to be an optimist, they chose to be happy. And by choosing happiness in their life, it became easier to perform even the mundane tasks that you and I wouldn't like. And maybe we complain about a little bit, meaning coming from that place of a deep sense of gratitude, happiness or joy, experiencing lots of joy. Not because necessarily something gave you joy, but you brought the joy that helps you get better. Like, if you are around me, it's pretty rare that I complain. I'll be very factual about, like, what I'm doing, like, how's it going? I'm like, it's bananas, crazy. But I won't complain about it because I feel joyful in the opportunity to serve. I think that if you have the opportunity to serve, you don't complain about the work required to do it. You know, it's like you honor that part, that struggle, that difficulty to serve, but more than just like begrudging it, bring the joy. Look, there is a reason why worldwide, that people understand the concept of whistle while you work. As soon as you say it, people go, oh, I know what that means. And it's not just because of Walt Disney, though, did a pretty good job on that one, right? It's because we know we should be happy engaging our day and not waiting for some delivery day when we finally become happy. If that sounds too common sense for you, okay, if I jumped into your life in the last six months and I looked at how much happiness you brought to the day, not took from it, you brought. I don't mean like, oh, Brendan, you could follow me around. My children brought me so much joy. I'm like, okay, that's one level, right? That's joy that the situations of the world can give you. But you know what? There's been a lot of turmoil in the world. Earthquakes around the world by other major storms, by political turmoil, by, I mean, real difficulties of life. And I know that hardship because I grew up with some very difficult times. And I have supported people in the most difficult times of their life, including death, by doing hospice work. I've seen a lot. And having coached for a decade, you can imagine I talk about people's problems all day. I'm pretty familiar with people, how they handle them, and the person who can will themselves to choose happiness, even amid that and bring it into the situations. But if you ever go volunteer at like a. Like, let's say a soup kitchen, it's so obvious when you see a good volunteer. I mean, it's like it's this. It's not that they know where everything is. It's that they are happily doing the work that Most people would see, like, I mean, you're like, well, man, the guy's sweeping the floor, volunteering. And you think, I'm glad I didn't get that task right. You could think that. But the guy would be whistling and having a good time and just so happy to be helping out. The people who are happy to be helping out are bringing joy into the situations of life. That's making them feel more happy, more engaged. And, yeah, they perform better. Because you know what sucks? When you're just doing the grind and it's 10pm at night and you hate the process. You know what I'm talking about? When it's 10 o' clock and you know you need to stay up till two in the morning and it's a grind. And you identify as just, I just.

Gotta hustle and I just gotta grind right now.

Guess what? That 10:00pm till that 2:00am, you know what that's gonna feel like.

It's gonna hurt. That's what it's gonna feel like.

I know I was there last night at 10pm going, I gotta go to at least 2am minimum. How am I gonna approach this next block of time? Am I gonna be like, oh, I can't believe I have to do this again. Then we're like, I'm gonna grind it out. I'm like, okay, I'm gonna bring some joy to this process because if I can put some positive emotion on this. And guess what? 11 noon. 1, 2, let's rock. Okay. Yes, sir. 11 midnight. 1, 2, let's Rock. But I'm enjoying it. I'm having it. Like, if you actually saw me work, you're like, he must be on something. Why is he like that? And it's not caffeine, trust me. Ask my team. I have no caffeine in front of me right now. Sometimes I do, but nothing right now. Because I, you know, I'm very susceptible to that. Some of you guys are too. You know, it's like, if my arm got cut off and you gave me an Advil, it'd grow back. It's like I'm very susceptible to things that I put in my body because I'm pretty clean in general. So I'll tell you, it's like, it's not that that gets me through. And what gets me through is joy. Write it down. I really mean this. Write it down in your journal. What gets me through is joy. What gets me through is joy. That attitude didn't just change my life. I found it over and over and over again in the top 15% of the top 15%, they engaged the work even when it wasn't sexy, because of the attitude they brought to it. And you know this again, I know it's common sense, but not common practice. But Viktor Frankl talked about it. The last of our human freedoms is the ability to choose one's own attitude. Next up, confidence. You got to start approaching your work with confidence. Same thing. Listen to this. You think, and this might be your big stumbling block. So please listen. You think just as soon as you get more success, just as soon as you get more accolades, respect, support, money, experience, competence, a better community of people around you, then you will now have earned the right and the blessing to be more confident. Is it true? People wait for something to give them happiness. They also wait for something to give them confidence. And that was a stunner. Confidence was so strongly intertwined in the conversations between the six habits that we'll go through. It stunned me. Even though I have a program called the Confidence Course, I still didn't know until we did this data to understand how important that is for people, but not to have it, to generate it. Your next level of performance at what you're doing does not only need to come from competence and community, which usually that's where people take it from, right? I get better at what I'm doing. So the more experience I have, the more easy it is for me to do, the more confident it is, right? That happens from experience. You might have the same thing in your genre or your career or your life. You've done it so many times, no problem, right? But there's an unconscious competence to that because you've done it so many times. But then there is a willed confidence that you're just saying, you know what, I'm going to do this confidently. Write it down, my friend. Just write down, literally write down the words, I'm going to do this confidently. Just choose that. See, most people, they start bumbling into something and then they want it to give them confidence. When I first started doing videos or books, like, my development was a little slow over my first couple years, I don't think I performed that much better. And it was because I kept waiting for something like some kind of, like size of a stage or I don't know, I don't know what I was waiting for to be more of a confident speaker. And then I was talking with a person who's very high performing and not even in my industry. But he was telling me about how he just decided to start owning his role in his business. He was the CEO of his business. He said one day, Brendan, I just, when I walked in the door, I don't know what it was for me, but I walked into the door, Brendan, and I knew I owned that space. You know, I was leasing it. He said, I didn't really own it because I owned the space I was in. And I realized, these are my employees, this is my space. And he said, I just stepped in full to the ownership role of who I was. And he goes, instantly I became a better leader because I owned it. Now I was confident that that's who I was and what I did. Nothing happened for him. No bigger paycheck, no more team, not any smarter. Well, maybe smarter by choosing a different disposition, right? I think a lot of intelligence is choosing the right disposition for how we need to serve. And he said, I just owned it. Well, I know it might be simple to think about, but let's ask about maybe are you in a relationship right now? Maybe you're married or you have a significant other, or maybe it was just. If you think about a relationship you have with a family member, have you fully stepped into owning that role yet? Like with confidence? You know, I was working with a friend. Right now he's having, he's having some challenge with his relationship with his wife. And I was over visiting with them and I saw even the way he brought things up. And so he was, he was very emasculated. He was a confident guy, but he wasn't being confident in his ability to love his wife. That makes sense. I've worked with Olympic level athletes and if they don't bring the confidence on the field, they're going to get smashed. And it wasn't like they needed 10 more training sessions. It's the mindset that we're walking into things. If we're not, you and me on the same page here about this, it's going to be hard to make you another level of success for yourself, right? Because you can't feel like you're gonna be self made unless you finally say, I'm gonna own this moment. I'm gonna bring some joy here and I'm gonna do this confident. Maybe it's time for you to be more confident in the relationships and the roles that you play in your life to really own them. If you're gonna be a good wife, own that and be a great wife. Like, know that as part of my identity, feel that, you know, if you're gonna be a great leader with your team, own, own that. Walk in the Office tomorrow. More confident than you have in six months for no other reason. I promise. People go, whoa, what's up with you? And that feeling that you have, like, that emotion, these things, presence with your team, joy with your team, confidence with your team. Social contagion, baby. It'll spread, but you gotta bring it. You can't wait for your team to give it to you. You can't wait for skills to give it to you. You can't wait for support to give it to you. If we can get you pulling these three feelings into your life, we're putting you on the same deck as high performers.

All right. Hey, my friend. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. If you're ready to go to another level, don't Forget, go to hpxcoaching.com Let me be your coach. Let me spend the first of each month with you giving you a personal development seminar. Let me help you get unstuck, break through your emotional blocks, find your real.

Clarity, your real passion, your real purpose.

And implement the habits that you know you need to implement. Change your life by getting a coach, getting some expert guidance. Listen, you got as far as you could get.

You're here.

You've achieved so much in your life. But to go to another level requires another level of mindset, another level of discipline, another level of direction and community and consistency. And that is what my coaching program is all about. So go to hpxcoaching.com and listen, if you're ready to go to a whole other level, I'm hiring. Please go to brendon.com hiring for our open roles. I got a big secret project that we are rolling out and you'll only find information that@Brendan.com we've got, I don't know, 10 or 12 open positions there. If you ever wanted to work with me, if you wanted me to be your leader, you wanted me to literally employ you and help you grow in your career and do what we do, serving this mission of helping people around the world achieve their dreams faster, helping them improve their lives. We live every day as a team to do that. And we are currently hiring. We're building out a new product and we need some people to help us do that. Brendan.com hiring if you don't know how to spell my name, don't even think about it. We're looking for people who are pros. If you're interested in internship with me, don't go there. We're not hiring interns. If you're interested in starting your career with me. Don't go there. We are an A team here. We've got people who are really experienced. So if you're new to personal development or you're new to marketing, you're probably not going to be the person we're looking for. We're looking for people with at least three years of professional experience in a lot of different roles because we take.

This role very seriously.

We get to change lives and millions of them every single day. That's the work. So we're looking for real pros, top of your game, ready to come on to an organization that reaches just as many people in the world as any other personal development influencer or trainer on the planet. And we'd be excited to have you.

Join us in a big new initiative.

We'Re rolling out for the beginning of the year. I can't even tell you any more about that. Go to brendan.com hiring if you'd like.

To work with us.

And if you just want to go to another level and have me as your coach, not your Boss, go to hpxcoaching.com so I can give you a brand new personal development session this month to help you set your goals, get on track, get unstuck and achieve your ultimate difference. Go to hboxcoaching.com for that. Thanks again for listening to the Brendon show. You all mean so much to me. I have so much coming out in the next couple months for you here that's gonna be unique and special and I know you're gonna love it. So keep your head up. I know it's been a hard year. Please remember, as always, you are stronger than you think and the future holds.

Good things for you.