How to Start a Dream (even when you're scared)

How do you start a dream that scares you? I get this question all the time. People say, brendan, you know, I know you started your books and you left corporate America and you've been through a lot and you've built all these different brands and these different web properties and these different things. How did you do it all? Weren't you scared? And I say, yeah, I was scared, but that didn't stop me. And I know how hard it can be, though, if you've got a big dream and you're just trying to figure out, how do I start it? Especially when it scares me. It scares me because I don't know how it'll turn out. It might compromise my position at work. It might freak out. My spouse, my wife, my kids might not understand it. Anytime you go to change something, it's scary. And starting a dream is ultimately change, right? Starting anything is change. So it's first and foremost to realize you're just responding to starting a dream. This is same way you respond to almost any change, right? It's not. People say, well, I must not believe my dream enough. No, you probably just are scared of change in general. Once you master change, then anything starting a dream or starting any new thing, period, gets a little easier. So let's talk about what the real heart of matter is. It's dealing with change. You know, starting a dream is learning how to deal with change. And so let's talk through. How can you do it in a way that, that supports you, but it gets you going? Well, first and foremost, primary thing you have to do is be honest. Why haven't you started the dream? If you got the dream and you haven't started, why haven't you started? Well, it's convenient to say, well, because I'm scared. And most people are lying to themselves. They're not scared. They're just. They're uncertain. They don't feel capable. They're not really scared. It's not fear. It's very popular to say, well, people are just fearful. And the reality is they're not. Often they're uncertain. Often they're worried. Often what's really driving them is that they don't have competencies or capabilities in that area. And if they did, they would do great. Sure, we can say, well, they're scared they're going to fail. But most people, I think as adults, they come more conscious. They just get in a rhythm of how much action they're willing to take during the day or not. So more often, its lack of discipline and sustained motivation is an Issue more than it is fear. They don't want enough, they don't hunger for it enough, and they don't orient their days to go get it. And that's the honest truth. The honest truth is not. Fear is putting them on the couch and they're curled up in a ball and terrified they're gonna fail and no one's gonna love them. No, they wanted it. They never stayed focused on it. If they don't focus on it consistently, they'll never start the dream. See, it has to be something that you obsess about a little bit. You pay attention to a lot. You start willing yourself and working yourself each day to move towards. That's how you start. It doesn't have to come with, look, I don't even care if you deal with your past stuff or your past issues at the beginning. Starting a dream, I just need you to go, okay, let's get in the game here. Let's start, let's do something. Let's take some action. So after you're honest with yourself. Honest with yourself also requires you. If you're like, well, Brendan, I'm very strong. I'm not one of these weak willed people who are driven by fear. You don't understand, Brendan, I, I am a perfectionist. You know, if you are a perfectionist, you're also not being honest yourself. If you have not started the dream, then, and you're saying it's because of perfectionism, you're lying. Please watch my YouTube video on perfectionism. If you were actually a perfectionist, at least you would be accurate. And every perfectionist by accurate definition would understand that perfectionism to perfect something can only happen after you've completed and released something after you've already done it. Perfection comes after you've done it. And now you start perfecting it and getting better at it and zooming it in and dialing it in. It only comes after you've done it. So if you haven't done it, if you haven't started, don't, don't fool yourself and tell yourself you're a perfectionist. What you are is scared. What you are is uncertain. What you are is incapable. So far, you don't have the competency, the confidence, the will, the attention, the energy, whatever it is for you. And by the way, I'm not here to tell you what your issue is. I'm just here saying be honest. Discover what it is. Is it really fear? Is it lack of hunger, motivation, focus, attention, energy, health? What has it been that has delayed you from starting that Be honest. Once you're honest with yourself, you take back the power of your life. You start to activate your personal power again. Now we can start moving on. Second thing you do after you're being honest with yourself is set up a learning journey map. What do you mean by that? If you got a dream, decide, okay, what would I have to learn and master to be able to start that dream and do it well or get into that dream and improve upon that means? So, for example, when I want to do these videos, I said, okay, well, I'm going to have to learn some stuff about online marketing. I'm going to have to learn some things about lighting. I'm going to have to learn some things about cameras. I'm going to have to learn some things about communication and get over my own stuff about talking to a lens or talking to people. I'm going to have to learn these things. So what did I did? What did I do? I scheduled my learning. I said, okay, this week I'm going to learn about cameras. This week I'm going to learn about lighting. This week I'm going to learn about Facebook. This week I'm going to learn about YouTube. And by scheduling the learning that was necessary to start the dream, I gained real competency. And with competency comes confidence. And with confidence comes action. And with action comes more competence in learning. With more competence comes more confidence. And you start getting this momentum along the way just based on your learning. Now, you can't learn forever at some. I mean, you can, but you need to at least start. Set a start date. It's like, learn as much as you can. But I had all these things lined up on a map. Okay, I'm going to learn this, learn this, learn this. Then this day, I'm going to shoot my first video. I'm a release it. Here we go. So it's necessary for you to schedule your learning and your start date. Otherwise, you will never start it right. You will never start the dream. You just won't. And you can't fool yourself in thinking you have to. You're like, I'm not going to start until it's perfect or I'm going to be great. I mean, the great Zig Ziglar said you don't. The great Zig Ziglar, what did he say? He said, oh, I love this quote, Travis. He said, you can't. You'll see. You don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to become great. I always love that. So don't worry about Having everything dialed in and everything perfect. Just start learning and schedule the date. I tell people often, they say, well, Brendan, what if I want to quit my job and start a dream? I say, great, Set a date. If you really hate your job, set a date. When is it going to be? 2 months out, 3 months out, 6 months out, 9 months out? If it's not in the calendar, you're never going to quit. You're going to stay there forever. Put it in the calendar. That's D day. That's freedom Day. That's day you're going to leave. What would you have to learn and what skills would you have to start acquiring before that date? So when you leave, boom, you hit the ground running. That's what you have to do. A learning schedule, a start date. Very simple. Be honest. Set a schedule for your learning and your start date. And then third, as soon as you're ready to go, take three actions every single day to keep your dream going forward. That's it. Just wake up every single day. Just. People say, well, how do I start, Brenda? I go, just give yourself three things to do each day. Just three things. Say, these are my three goals today that I'm gonna do to move towards my dream. Everybody can do three things to move their dream forward every day. You can't tell me you can't do three things. They could be simple things. They could be one phone call. They could be a series of emails. They could be one video. They could be, you know, one page of writing. They can be one thing of creation. You can be one PowerPoint, one keynote. You can do simple things. But don't say you can't do three things. Because if you can't figure out a way to do three things every day to move your dreams forward, then you're not living. You're trapped somewhere. And you're trapped in a series of bad routines and bad habits and false expectations about how to do everything for everybody else. Before you ever do anything for you, your dreams are necessary. They were given to you. You have them. You dream of something. You're excited to start something. Your job, your mission is to overcome your fear, to overcome your inadequacies, to start to schedule it, to start developing competency and capability, confidence. To start moving towards it. That's why you were gifted with that hunger and that drive and the desire. Listen to it, apply it. Start moving towards it, and you'll start to experience what we call the charged life. Hey, everybody, it's Brendon. Did you enjoy this episode? If you did Would you do me a favor? Just share it with your family, your friends, your loved ones, some that you care about, your co workers, someone you think could benefit from having this positive message in their life. And if you'd like to hear more from me, just go over to itunes and download my podcast. It's called the Charged Life. And you can also get my book for free@motivationmanifesto.com until I see you next time. Go out there every single day of your life. Live fully, love openly, and make your difference today.