The Attitude Of Service

Hey, my friends, it's Brendon Burchard and welcome to a best of edition of the Brendon show. These best of episodes feature training that I have done live, sometimes on online to tens of thousands of people or live on stage where I was speaking.

On some stages across the world.

Or these might be some of my monthly training programs and highlights of those that I do every single month with our monthly students. So I know you're gonna really enjoy these because these are a little bit more of a deep dive look at some of my training as a personal and professional development trainer. You know, I focus so much on helping you find that deeper level of motivation and start practicing some of those high performance habits with. Well, you hear me talk about many of those concepts in these special episodes here. These are my best of trainings only and exclusively right here on the Brendon show. So I hope you enjoyed them. Please note that as you hear me speak in many of these, you'll hear me reference something because sometimes I'll have been training live or on video or on stage or through a broadcast. So you might not be able to see something that I'm suggesting or motioning to or maybe even drawing out on a flip chart or motioning towards on a presentation, but you'll get the gist of it. So but make sure you bust out your journal, take some good notes here because this is really valuable insights on the mindset or the strategies that you need to adopt in order to improve your life. And if you want to go and get more content like this, but much more deeper and have more of an interactive relationship with me in this type of training, make sure you join our high performance monthly training program. That's our monthly subscription program where I go live with you and our high performance students every single month and I train on a new topic or a new piece of research that we've created from the high performance institute and I train on that and then I do Q and A and actual live coaching, interactive coaching with people every single month. That's called high performance monthly and you can Access it at brendan.com monthly, that's brendon.com monthly B-R-E-N-O-N.com monthly to get deeper dive training similar to this. So if you like this, you would love that training program. But without further ado, let's jump in right now to one of the Brendon show's best of trainings.

What are the secrets of the world's most successful wealthy, happy, fulfilled people? What do they know? What do they behave like? How do they interact with other people? And how do they stand out from the crowd to live the life of their dreams? We've been talking a lot about it and I'm happy to hear about the momentum in your life. When I stood on the crumpled hood of this car in another country after my car accident, thinking about my life and feeling life sort of drain out of my body, I mean, it was a real sort of earth shaking moment for me, realizing a young man that life can bleed away from us, that. That our time here is really limited. And it made me ask this question of did I matter? Did I make a difference? Did I change the world or change somebody's world? It was so real and raw for me in that moment that I've never stopped thinking about it. And today, that was so long ago, 18 years ago now that I had that accident and it just made me continually think about how am I going to matter? How am I going to make a difference? Now of course I realize everybody matters, but for me, where do I have that personal definition of making my difference? What does it mean to me? And every person I've ever met in the top 2% always talks about this time in their lives when they learn to develop the service mindset. And I'm guessing if you're still here, some part of your life, somewhere you've already developed that something happened in your life or there was a decision or a turning point or a situation in your life where you decided to make your difference, to make your mark in the world. Where was it? Do you have a story about that? What was that time when you realized it wasn't just about you on this planet, that maybe you had your first child or maybe you had an accident or you lost somebody, or maybe you just narrowly escaped being hurt? Something happened that made you really think about life and realize that life is more than just pleasing and getting our own little simple pleasures, that we can do something meaningful, that we can serve humanity or serve our family or take care of others, or what was it for you? I'd love for you just to pause this program for a moment and think about what helped you develop the service mindset. Because I can tell you, I've never met people who are in or wanted to be in the top 2% who, who didn't have that in their heart, that desire to want to make a difference in some way or another. So where did that come from for you? Was it a family member who inspired that? Did something happen? Did you Just decide one day I'd really like to. Before we begin, just pause this program and think about, what is that story for you that made you want to make a difference, to live a meaningful life? Where did that come from for you? And here's my question about that story. Do other people know it? Does your family know that story? Do your friends know that story? Or stories? Does your marketplace, your team? Do people know that story about you, that thing that made you develop your service mindset? Because if they don't, then you're leaving one of the biggest narratives of leadership on the table. Our personal narrative about how we developed our service mindset is one of the most important stories we'll ever tell our children. It's one of the most important stories we'll ever tell our team because it explains to people why we do what we do, why we are doing what we are doing to make our difference, why something is meaningful to us. So if you've never told people that story, we just changed your life today. Because so much part of the legacies that we leave in life to other people are those stories about why we do what we do, about why we care, about how we find our own meaning in life. And I would encourage you, as you share the story more often with people, you'll start to hear their stories more often, and you start to realize everyone's got a story about why they want to make a difference and why they serve what they care about. And you deepen your relationships with people, you deepen your influence with them just by asking them that questions, by understanding why they have this service mindset about what made them develop this desire to make their difference, to serve other people. You learn so much about people that you become somebody important in their life because you're one of the few people to understand. I'm still blown away. I've traveled the world teaching people how to share their voice with the world. And so many people don't have this story down yet. They've never really told it. And I'm like, why it's such a critical part of our life. I mean, it's why we're doing what we're doing. And everyone has a reason why everybody has this story, but maybe they haven't honed it down yet. If you haven't had the reason yet, then this is just a good time to journal and sit down and think, what's the difference I want to make in the world? What is it really about? How do I want to change other people's lives? What do I Want to contribute the top 2% at some point, have developed their service mindset. They have that developed story, and they share it a lot. Every time I interview them, I ask them, what made you want to make a difference in the world? And they always have an answer. It always surprised me they had an answer. But I learned a lot from it. You know, to me, I've also learned that service, I mean real service, not just customer service, but service to humanity, really equals this idea, this conception of designing experiences for people, right? The world's greatest customer service companies are constantly thinking about customer experience design. How do we design the experience that our customers have when they first meet us, when they come into our marketing funnel, to what's the customer experience when they interact with our company, to buying a product, to what happens after they buy a product with us over their entire life cycle with us. That customer experience design is so important. When I walk into a restaurant, what do I experience there? When I walk onto an airline, what do I experience there? When I rent a car, what do I experience there? The world's best companies in those areas become obsessive about that. Apple thinks about, when I order something from Apple and I get it, when I unpackage that thing and open it, what's the experience I have working with that new product of theirs? That's customer experience design. But we can even broaden it further. But before we do, by the way, if you haven't done that soup to nuts, end to end for your company, that's something you need to do with your senior team. Sit them down and say, okay, what do we want our customer experience to be about? How do we want them to interact with our brand and feel about our brand? What can we sort of insert in our interaction with them to surprise them with value and excellence? What can we really do to shock them when they have this experience with us? It's such a good experience. They tell their friends, like, man, you wouldn't believe what happened over here with so and so company. You want to achieve that with your brand and your business. So think about customer experience design. But real service to the world is thinking about what experiences can I give people as I'm serving them. And it's funny, sometimes service, this concept of service lives at such a theoretical level, almost a philosophical level in people's lives. And I always try to say the best way to land that is to think about a specific person. You know, I'd like you to think about who could you provide some more service to specifically? And what experience could you give them that makes their experience with you more meaningful, more impactful in their lives. Is there somebody in your office who you could provide some more service to? You know, maybe there's a receptionist in your office, and that person, he or she you really have never really had any interaction with? What experience could you create or design for them that would deepen your relationship with them or increase their happiness at work? You know, what could you do for them? What about your spouse? How is your service to your spouse doing? Yeah, you have service to your spouse. What could you design? What type of experience could you design to deepen your relationship with him or her? What could you do for them? You know, think about the next date night you're going to have. What experience could you create that they'd be talking about with their friends and they'd be texting their friends and telling them about? Right? Because some of us just like, let's go to dinner, honey. You go to dinner, you eat, you comment on the restaurant, you go home, you go to bed and you fart. You know, it's like, that's not sexy. That's not impressive. That's not serving your marriage, serving your spouse. Yes, you should serve your spouse. Care for them. I know some of you are watching, like, I'm tired of serving my spouse. They don't give back. Hey, you know what? Keep doing your best. It's all you can do in life, you know, keep doing your best. So what's the best service you could provide to your spouse?

What about your kids?

What experience could you create for them this weekend that they're going to remember and tell all the kids on Monday? You know, real service in life, it's developing that mindset. You start finding joy in doing this, thinking about all the little things you could do to do two people and four people to surprise them, to add some value and joy and enthusiasm, excitement in their life. What could you do? I mean, really dork out about it? I love to sit and think about, what could I do for this person? What could I do? This person's added so much value to me into my life and my brand. What could I do for them? And I sit and I think about it, and I take joy in it. I brainstorm it just as much. I brainstorm the growth of my business. I brainstormed the nice things I could do for the people who've interacted with me, and my business makes sense, right? So spend some time really thinking about, what experience could you design for your customers? What experience could you design for Your spouse for your loved ones, maybe for your family. What could you really do for people? What about your friends? And if you ever read my book, the Charge, there's a chapter in there where we talk about friendships and we talk about this concept about growth friendships, right? You have growth friends, you have maintenance friends, and you have old friends, right? Old friends. You had them. You don't really keep in touch with them. Maybe you send a card once in a while. Maintenance friends you might talk to once or twice a year just to maintain the friendship. But then you have your growth friends. This is a group of people where you do stuff together actively once or twice or several times a year to develop and deepen that relationship. Well, what's an experience you could design for them for us, like we used to do. Like we do New Year's trips, or we do summer trips, or we might do a golf outing, or we might do a trip to Vegas, or we might do a trip down to Mexico or a trip over to Fiji where we go together and we do something. Sometimes it's as simple as just getting together and all hanging out for a movie night. Sometimes it's really going out and doing some grand adventure together. But you have to design that. Otherwise it never gets done. And I know it's challenging. I struggle with it, too, especially as the business builds and builds and builds. You know, it's hard. I get it. But it's about thinking about those experiences that creates the magic in life. Because if life is feeling very mundane and boring for you, it's because you haven't been doing this well enough. You haven't been thinking about what service could you provide to your friends to create a great experience with them? What service could you give your spouse? Design a great experience for him or her? What service could you give to your family by designing a great experience experience for them? It doesn't always cost money. It can, but it could just be simple things that you do together to have a great day, have a great weekend, have a great trip. And designing experiences for your customers and your teams, that's what great leaders, that's all they're doing. A great leader isn't just someone who's bold and strong. They're getting outside of themselves. They have a humility in which they want to take care of other people. And that is what ultimate influence equals. Ultimate influence comes from consistent demonstrations of caring. Makes sense, right? Great leaders, great people to influence care the most, why do we honor, you know, Gandhi, Martin Luther King? Why do we honor Mother Teresa? Why do we honor the great leaders of our time, the ones who maybe they weren't their highest profile, but everybody loved them because they had so consistently demonstrated caring for other people. And so your job is this word right here. It's what we get away from often. I know you care for people.

There's no question.

You wouldn't be here if you did not. But we often lose track of this guy right here. Demonstrations of caring. And not once in a while, demonstrations. See, what happens in a lot of marriages and relationships is people, they go out for Valentine's Day, they go out for New Year's, they go out once in a while on a Friday night. But that's all there really is there. There's no magic, there's not consistent. I mean, what could you do? Could you make some coffee for him.

Or her in the morning?

Could you go. Could you think of the thing they wanted and go run and grab that for them? Could you show them in some way? Yes, show them. And some people say, well, showing them is not their thing. No, everybody's thing is showing them. We all have, you know, if you've ever read, like the five Love Languages, we all have different ways in which we appreciate how people care for us, but we all have to be shown it at some level. We might favor being told it. We might be favor of being kinesthetic and being touched or held, but it still matters to be shown it. And influence in your work life comes from demonstrations of caring, demonstrating, making the right decision for your team because you care about their work life balance. Making the right decision when for your team because you care about how they feel, like passionate about their work, it comes from caring about other people. And it's a real thing that matters in your sales. I'm sure there's somebody in your life, if you think about it, who needs a demonstration of caring. Maybe an old friend who hasn't heard from you, maybe a spouse, a loved one. But somebody might need that. Who is it and what could you do for them today? I'd really like you to think about that. Is there somebody on your team or in your business who just you're lacking some influence with? Maybe you're at odds with them or having conflict with them. How could you demonstrate that, you know, that they're an important person and they're a valued member of your team or a valued person in your life? I think that real mastery in life comes from this, you know, real deep influence with other people, comes from how much we care for them and how much we demonstrate it and I can only encourage you to do that more often.

All right, my friend, I hope that you enjoyed that best of episode. Was that inspiring? Were you fired up? Did you love it? If you did, make sure you do me a favor, go out on social media somewhere and share that episode. You know, just go out, post it somewhere, post yourself listening to it. Make sure you hashtag the Brendon show because when you do that I can look you up and we can find you on Instagram and post that on the social media. And sometimes we do all expense paid trips to people we find. We just randomly select people, we send them gifts, autograph books, swag T shirts, all expense paid trips to some of my seminars. So make sure you, you let us know, share what you thought about this episode out there on the social media worlds and then we can find you and celebrate you. And also I would love to invite you to join us in our high performance monthly program. So just go to brendan.com forward/monthly. That's brendon.com monthly. That's where we do deeper dive trainings like you just heard. But we do that every single month. And there's some live Q and A there and I do some giveaways and we give students in that monthly program tickets to myself seminars and some extra special training on leadership. So make sure you check it out@brendon.com monthly. I appreciate you being part of this community of so many people dedicated to finding that deeper drive of motivation and practicing high performance habits so that they can become extraordinary in their careers, in your personal life, in your health, you can live an extraordinary quality of life. And sometimes you just need a little bit more training and a little bit more nudge, a little more energy, a little bit more drive and consistency. And I'm hoping that being part of this community with the Brendon show, I'm providing that to you in some way. So thank you, my friend for listening. I look forward to seeing you or listening with you on the next episode of the B R E N D o N show.

Sam.